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Dîn-Heru
06-30-2004, 00:12
The wind howled down the mountainside, down towards an ancient longhouse. The sky was covered with clouds, hindering the glimmer of the moon and the stars from bringing hope in a dark night. The longhouse and its surrounding buildings lay sleeping in a weary state. Uneasiness crept around the corners and under the doors. Ten guards patrolled the grounds in the flickering of torches. Inside the Lord, his wife and two sons slept along with the rest of the household. The door opened slowly, but not surprisingly as it was time for a guard change. Ten men entered. Three of the men went towards the Lord’s bed. As they approached the sleeping man they drew their knives. The Lord and his household would not live to see the sun push through the clouds as morning came with new hope. The ten men withdrew from the longhouse. In the longhouse twenty men, women and children lay with throats cut and a look of horror upon their faces. Outside ten bodies lay scattered. The hall of the young hirdsmen was ablaze, its flames testament to the evil that had occurred in that dark night.

Across from the longhouse, on the other side of the fjord, lay another longhouse and several other large halls. As the servants awoke at the first daylight, shouting and much noise could be heard all over. Across the fjord the smoke could still be seen rising towards the now blue sky.

The Lord of the house ordered his ships and men to be readied to sail across the fjord. The water was calm, having settled after the storm last night. As the ships came closer to the shore the faces of the men, save eleven, showed horror of the scene in front of the longhouse. Black burned out buildings dotted the area in front of the longhouse. On one of the two longboats the Lord stood, clad in his finest armour with a great sword at his side and his body was draped in a great red cape, on its back his family crest. The ships shored alongside the burned wreck of another longboat. The men jumped ashore and scattered to search for survivors. The Lord and ten of his men went straight to the longhouse. The ten men began carrying out the bodies. The Lord went over to the high seat. He glance up at the shields and banners hanging overhead. He then glanced over to the body of the dead lord of that hall. A shrilling feeling ran down his spine. The Lord looked back to the seat and the image that was carved into it. The image of an eagle with a branch in its claws. An image which was strikingly similar to that on the Lord’s cape. The only difference was that the Lord’s eagle clenched a sword, rather than a branch. The Lord looked once more to the red shields and banners overhead, their proud eagles looking ready to fly down and strike. The Lord turned and lowered himself into the seat, a smirk appearing openly for the first time. Just as he sat down a great rumble could be heard. One of the shields fell, striking the Lord’s knee with such a force that he lurched forward. Just as he fell forward the second shield fell. It hit him across the neck. The ten men came rushing to help their lord. As they lifted his limp body the hall was filled with light as the longhouse crumbled to a pile of wood and rocks from above.

The men outside had rushed to after the rockslide had stopped and started to dig out their lord. But he and his ten men were dead, crushed under large rocks.

Two lords had died that night and day. Alongside them, many innocent men women and children. They were brothers. One killed by the greed of the other, the other killed because of his greed…

Ludens
07-08-2004, 10:52
Very nice, Dîn-Heru. An appropriate moralistic ending.
But it is rather confusing that you have two characters designated 'Lord'.

Dîn-Heru
07-08-2004, 19:58
Thank You.

Yes I know. but giving them actual names would deter from giving it universal meaning imo.

Also I wrote it at 1 am, so I wasn't exactly 100% awake. http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

But if you got any good norse names I could name them, then by all means I am open for suggestions.

Ludens
07-11-2004, 13:46
Quote[/b] (Dîn-Heru @ July 08 2004,20:58)]but giving them actual names would deter from giving it universal meaning imo.
True, but it is confusing. I wondered wether you had gone back in time halfway during the story, because you wrote the lord was killed, and then there he lived again.


Quote[/b] ]But if you got any good norse names I could name them, then by all means I am open for suggestions.
I am no good at names, I tend to get names for my stories from the MTW heroes listing. But perhaps you could give them a descriptive name. For example: the Lord of the Ship and the Lord of the House.