Do you consider it acceptable to date an ex-girlfriend of one of your friends?
Before anyone gets the wrong idea, it's been almost two years since the people involved parted and I never considered making an attempt on her until now.
A moral dilemma
Do you consider it acceptable to date an ex-girlfriend of one of your friends?
Before anyone gets the wrong idea, it's been almost two years since the people involved parted and I never considered making an attempt on her until now.
Last edited by Kralizec; 10-18-2008 at 22:55.
Re: A moral dilemma
Yes, I do, certainly under the conditions you outlined.
CR
Ja Mata, Tosa.
The poorest man may in his cottage bid defiance to all the forces of the Crown. It may be frail; its roof may shake; the wind may blow through it; the storm may enter; the rain may enter; but the King of England cannot enter – all his force dares not cross the threshold of the ruined tenement! - William Pitt the Elder
Re: A moral dilemma
yeah, you good son... go for it!
Do you hate Drug Cartels? Do You believe that the Drug War is basically a failure? Do you think that if we Legalized the Cannabis market, that use rates would drop, we could put age limits on cannabis, tax it, and other wise regulate it? Join The ORG Marijuana Policy Project!
In American politics, similar to British politics, we have a choice between being shot in our left testicle or the right testicle. Both parties advocate pissing on the little guys, only in different ways and to a different little guy.
Re: A moral dilemma
Two years? Seems like fair game to me.
Though it might be nice to give the friend a heads-up first. Plus if it turns out he couldn't care less then you can stop worrying.
Re: A moral dilemma
My thoughts exactly. Two years is a long time, I doubt he'd mind unless he's still emotional about it. In which case you'd do well to refer him to a psychologist.Originally Posted by Poor Bloody Infantry
Re: A moral dilemma
Couldn't have said it better myself.
Re: A moral dilemma
Coming from someone who had the position of your friend, two years should be fine, but it's always nice to let the friend know.
Re: A moral dilemma
How they parted and what each side of the old story carried further decides the verdict.
It's not like you'd surely be still thinking of someone you had broken up with 2 years ago but this fact does not mean that it wouldn't create sparks in your mind should a friend starts dating your ex.
So many personal and cultural variables effect it. You'd still get a "no problem" reply from your friend if you would be kind enough to ask about your thoughts about his ex, as PBI suggested, however it could still be problemous for him in his mind afterwards during your relationship.
Friends are to stay forever, generally feel even stronger to stay after all girls that pass through your life.
I go for the worst case scenarios when it comes to dating. It's always less painful to turn your head away from a beauty provided you need to act such.
And sorry for being a cautious pain in the a**, maybe it's all about our culture and I'm speaking of nonsense.
Last edited by LeftEyeNine; 10-19-2008 at 00:46.
Re: A moral dilemma
No problems here.
Rest in Peace TosaInu, the Org will be your legacy
Re: A moral dilemma
Seconded. In my situation, my ex asked me if it was ok for "us to date friends of the other person" I said yes. Then when she started going out it was a total surprise the way I felt towards that relationship.
If you take the cautious route, ask him again about a week after going out with her how he feels. He probably will say fine but still...
Re: A moral dilemma
Go for it.
#Hillary4prism
BD:TW
Some piously affirm: "The truth is such and such. I know! I see!"
And hold that everything depends upon having the “right” religion.
But when one really knows, one has no need of religion. - Mahavyuha Sutra
Freedom necessarily involves risk. - Alan Watts
Re: A moral dilemma
Thanks, guys. And Kekvit ;)
They've got a fairly complicated history, but he dumped her when she was still crazy about him and he was only keeping her around for the sake of being in a relationship.
He's not exactly a beacon of calmness and reason either, and I'm pretty sure he's going to be extremely pissed.
I haven't actually asked her out yet; I'll take Pever's suggestion and see if it's going anywhere before I break the news to him.
Last edited by Kralizec; 10-19-2008 at 18:01.
Re: A moral dilemma
Yeah, but inform your mate first. Been in similar waters, it's very awkward. Shouldn't hold back but it's not that good of an idea unless you are serious about it, just a friendly warning. He can hold nothing against you at least, but he will.
Re: A moral dilemma
you haven't met my friends...
I have two particular friends who are very close, they go everywhere together.
well friend #1 got involved with this particular girl, and they dated for about a year, most of the time the 3 would hang out together.
however, they broke up, and a month later, friend #2 was dating the same girl... and the 3 of them would hang out together also!
with all the kissing in public thing
Mini-mod pack for EB 1.2 for Alexander and RTWSpoken languages:
(just download it and apply to get tons of changes!) last update: 18/12/08 here
ALEXANDER EB promoter
Re: A moral dilemma
Oh trust me Lz3, it gets a LOT more awkward than that. Imagine that situation, but add in friend #3. Then add in girl's dissaproving friends, then add in a whole lot more confusion.
Re: A moral dilemma
Are you guys programmers or computer science majors? Because seriously, I see this with computer guys all the time. I think it's because it's so rare for them to be introduced to new women that when they do meet one, she kinda ends up dating several of them.you haven't met my friends...
I have two particular friends who are very close, they go everywhere together.
well friend #1 got involved with this particular girl, and they dated for about a year, most of the time the 3 would hang out together.
however, they broke up, and a month later, friend #2 was dating the same girl... and the 3 of them would hang out together also!
with all the kissing in public thing
Koga no Goshi
I give my Nihon Maru to TosaInu in tribute.
Re: A moral dilemma
Bros before ****. Always remember, friends stay, girlfriends/girls come and go.
So, after 2 years, hit the pedal, but inform your friend first.
Ja mata, TosaInu. You will forever be remembered.
Proud
Been to:
Swords Made of Letters - 1938. The war is looming in France - and Alexandre Reythier does not have much time left to protect his country. A novel set before the war.
A Painted Shield of Honour - 1313. Templar Knights in France are in grave danger. Can they be saved?
Re: A moral dilemma
meh that was high school...Are you guys programmers or computer science majors? Because seriously, I see this with computer guys all the time. I think it's because it's so rare for them to be introduced to new women that when they do meet one, she kinda ends up dating several of them.
Spoiler Alert, click show to read:
Last edited by ||Lz3||; 10-20-2008 at 20:39.
Mini-mod pack for EB 1.2 for Alexander and RTWSpoken languages:
(just download it and apply to get tons of changes!) last update: 18/12/08 here
ALEXANDER EB promoter
Re: A moral dilemma
As others have said, ask first.
One thing you might want to take into account is the amount of time you spend with your friend. Having her around when hanging out with him and others can cause either a) jealousy problems, or b) re-ignite their old feelings. You said it was a complicated relationship, be careful down when going down this path.
The .Org's MTW Reference Guide Wiki - now taking comments, corrections, suggestions, and submissions
If I werent playing games Id be killing small animals at a higher rate than I am now - SFTS
Si je n'étais pas jouer à des jeux que je serais mort de petits animaux à un taux plus élevé que je suis maintenant - Louis VI The Fat
"Why do you hate the extremely limited Spartan version of freedom?" - Lemur
Re: A moral dilemma
oooohhh. i may have a similiar problem, only its been 2 months, not 2 years....
Re: A moral dilemma
Just remember... wrap it before you tap it.
Re: A moral dilemma
I see that everywhere. I don't even know any computer programers. Well, one. But he owns a resturant.Are you guys programmers or computer science majors? Because seriously, I see this with computer guys all the time. I think it's because it's so rare for them to be introduced to new women that when they do meet one, she kinda ends up dating several of them.
I think the real question is, "Is she a hotty?"
Last edited by Yoyoma1910; 10-21-2008 at 02:47.
My kingdom for a
Re: A moral dilemma
Dont do it. Not that soon, unless he broke it off.
Re: A moral dilemma
Re: A moral dilemma
Rather personal.....
Last edited by Strike For The South; 01-18-2009 at 05:42.
There, but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford
My aim, then, was to whip the rebels, to humble their pride, to follow them to their inmost recesses, and make them fear and dread us. Fear is the beginning of wisdom.
I am tired and sick of war. Its glory is all moonshine. It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, for vengeance, for desolation.
Re: A moral dilemma
I give you leave, minion.
This space intentionally left blank.
Re: A moral dilemma
Go For It! But........
https://img100.imageshack.us/my.php?image=org8hp3.jpg
Last edited by ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88; 10-21-2008 at 20:40.
Re: A moral dilemma
No tapping a buddy's ex. Ever. It's in the Man-Code, Chapter 3, verse 5.
Not a buddy? No prob. But you can't do both.
Maybe it's OK in Europe.
Be well. Do good. Keep in touch.
Re: A moral dilemma
If it's a buddy, good ol' codes tested by time are sure to depend on.
Another reason to bow before Kukri-sensei 's wisdom.
Re: A moral dilemma
Go for it, and don't ask him just let him know, you don't need permission, well not his anyway
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks