The stupidest thing you've ever done

[GeneralHankerchief]

Thread title says it all. And if you're a bit hesitant on sharing, let me make you feel a more at ease and tell you mine.

This just happened within the past two weeks. I don't know if it tops my list, but it's definitely a contender, and the pain is fresh in my mind.

Two weekends back, some friends and I rented a cabin for a couple of days in the mountains of Virginia. Beautiful scenery, a great time was had, etc etc etc. That was the good stuff, and is thus not the focus of this story. On Sunday, the final day, we decided to take it easy and take advantage of the weather and go tubing down the Shenandoah River.

If you've never been tubing, it's a fun, leisurely activity: you go in an inner tube and just let the current take you down a couple miles until the designated disembark point. Drinking is totally acceptable if you bring a cooler and aren't stupid about littering. Anyway, we were told that the entire trip was about three miles down the river and would take roughly three hours. Being three hours in the sun, we all put sunscreen on to some extent.

I, being roughly the same shade of skin as Lord Voldemort, made especially sure to do so. I don't tan, you see. I either stay white (sunscreen properly applied) or go straight to red (guess).

MISTAKE NUMBER ONE: I put my sunscreen on as we got out of the car; i.e. before we were in full tubing mode. Thus, I still had footwear on and didn't apply any there.

MISTAKE NUMBER TWO: My sunscreen was easily portable. I elected not to take it with me.

We paid our money, took the bus ride to the starting point along the river, and were finally ready to go.

MISTAKE NUMBER THREE: Not wanting them to get wet, I immediately took my footwear off.

One hour passed.
Two hours passed.
Three hours passed. (note: by all accounts this was how long the trip was supposed to take, and it's not like we were purposely being slow)

By now I could see my feet turning red.

MISTAKE NUMBER FOUR: I fully recognized what was happening and saw my future in front of me and yet made absolutely no move to put my footwear back on.

Four hours passed.

Four and a half hours later, the ride was over. The pain hit, oh, right about the exact time I first put pressure of any kind on my feet.

Agony.
Suffering.
Burning.
Blisters. Dear God, the BLISTERS. I'll spare you the graphical descriptions, but they were rather large.

This fun little excursion happened on July 26th. August 5th was the first day I was successfully able to put on footwear of any kind without experiencing extreme pain (luckily I do about 75% of my work remotely, otherwise things would have gotten really bad).

So yeah, wear sunscreen. Don't be an idiot. I had four separate instances in which this could have been prevented, and took advantage of none of them. And if I ever start to act superior in any way... remind me of this thread.

Anyway, that's my candidate. What about the rest of you? Spill it.

[Fragony]

Stabbing someone. He survived it and never put charges gladly. I had blood all over me but made it home

[Visor]

Stabbing someone. He survived it and never put charges gladly. I had blood all over me but made it home

Agony.
Suffering.
Burning.
Blisters. Dear God, the BLISTERS. I'll spare you the graphical descriptions, but they were rather large.

I see the similarities.

[Marcvs julius]

when i was about four years old in the kindergarden i started a figth with a gril in the cantine line... she punch me so hard that i almost lost my left eye, two weeks later i was wearing glases because my eye moved a bit to the side, many years later i still wear glases...
oh and my kidergardern was prety violent it was rare week whidout confusion...

[PROVOST]

OP - I did once fall asleep on an island beach and my feet were also not sunscreen protected and they got sunburnt REALLY bad.

Was not a mistake I ever have made ever again.

[ReluctantSamurai]

I'm a contractor with over 35 yrs. experience in all phases of construction. Luckily, what follows happened in my own home and not a customers

During the process of remodeling my master bathroom, I'm installing the water supply lines to the vanity. I've already installed the new wiring and the wall behind the vanity is the only place I can bring in the piping. I'm drilling the holes in the studs (two-basin vanity, so I have two directions to go from the feeder lines) while reading note to self to pay attention to wiring location (electric is on).

So what do I do? Bore a hole in the last stud I need to get through and.....ZZzzzzt....hit the line feed for the whole bathroom. @#$%! An hour and a half later, wiring fixed, and I'm ready to resume.

So what do I do? Put the friggin' drill bit back in the same hole to finish and....ZZzzzzzt....hit the same line.......FOR THE SECOND TIME!!! After I replaced the wire FOR THE SECOND TIME, I decided it was time to do something else for the day.

May not qualify for the stupidest thing I've ever done, but it certainly is the most idiotic thing I've ever done in all my years of building.

[Ibrahim]

Well, I once made the mistake of trusting a co-worker, who ended up stitching me up so badly I temporarily lost my job.

[Fragony]

OP - I did once fall asleep on an island beach and my feet were also not sunscreen protected and they got sunburnt REALLY bad.

Was not a mistake I ever have made ever again.

Heh friend of mine did as well, even in tbe Netherlands the sun can really burn you badly but in Spain you get roasted. He had passed out and I found a way to at least cover his legs but his feet I couldn't help, there was no sand to cover them, and I couldn't wake him up as he was completily gone. There wasn't any shadow Icould drag him into either, dragging an unconsious body with the notorious guarda-civil patrolling everywhere is a bad idea anyway. He learned his lesson as well.

[Csargo]

Ah, sunburnt feet lovely thing. Was at a lake when I was a teenager sitting under a tree. Didn't think if was necessary to put sunscreen on considering the shade from the tree. Putting on shoes for the next few days was extremely painful. Worst area to be sunburnt imho.

[Fragony]

Worst area to be sunburnt imho.

Without going into details, trust me it isn't. Que, Spanish beach, drunk, I don't remember anything else

[Csargo]

Without going into details, trust me it isn't. Que, Spanish beach, drunk, I don't remember anything else

[HopAlongBunny]

Skiing. Last run of the day; gentle cruise down Olympic chair at Lake Louise.
Going up on the chair, a sociable gentleman and I split a joint or two; its a long chair and got stalled halfway for a bit.
I decide I might as well just drop off the face instead of taking the trails; its pretty low key. As I pick my way down, I decide to just tuck it.
Flying along I hit the cat track and launch down the next section; as I come into a landing...the flat light reveals moguls just as I'm going to land:
Panic (1st mistake) wipe out, windmilling with skis attached by safety straps; one ski sticks into the snow directly on my fall line.
I straddle it dead centre; most powerful kick in the nuts ever!
Much later, numbness subsiding, I get up and attach my skis: ski patrol arrives with toboggan, I refuse the ride (2nd mistake).
When I get to the bottom I take a dump. Blood in the water! I check myself out: gash on my scrotum and a testicle dangling out (they are attached!). I poke the teste back into my sack and pester my friends for a ride to go get stitches.
The nurses at Banff hospital laughed very loudly (when out of my sight) and I heard the comment: 'needs stitches where!?; several times.

[GeneralHankerchief]

I think we have a winner.

[classical_hero]

I broke my arm as a young child while i was walking on the metal part of a trampoline while the trampoline was broken. But most of my broken bones were a result of stupidity, except for one time while i was riding my bike amongst some friends and they had a one of the big rubber balls that you play with, since they are soft an won't hurt you, except if your bike tyre happens come into contact with said ball stopping the bike and physics takes over and you go tumbling of the bike to get a broken arm.

[Rob The Bastard]

Sun burn? check! Cooked the top of my lower legs so badly that the skin blistered and fell off...
Drilled through power cable? check! only done this once, recently... 1st time in 30 years , so not like I make a habit out of it.

(30 years ago) Used a pair of side cutters to crimp the primer of a .22 bullet, while holding it in my hands... yes, they do go off. Luckily the projectile was pointing away from me.

(45 years ago) As a toddler, I put my fingers into one of the wringer of an old washing machine... luckily it stopped when it got to my upper arm.

No broken bones though!

[Greyblades]

When I was in secondary school I had a very big bag, a giant rucksack of a thing that made me stick out like a sore thumb, but I kept with it because it let me bring in all my school books; less preparation for the next day meant more time to play games. As was common anything that makes a kid stick out would attract teasing both from friends and foes, one of the things they would do is stand behind pull at the straps.

Being the stressed out hormonal powder-keg I was it would usually end with me swearing at the more persistant pullers and occasionally I either knocked them around or chased them with an intent to kill until I gave up exhausted, the latter being far more common due to my aversion to PE.

One day we were lining up for the morning assembly and I thought I felt the familiar tugging on my back. I dont remember why I was so angry that morning but instead of my usual opening of telling them to quit it I exploded, whipping around and slugging the first face behind me I saw.

I took me a few seconds to realize that the person I had knocked to the ground was a girl, one in the same year as me who while I didnt get along particularly well with I had never really had reason to hate. To this day I do not know whether the tugging was real or imagined and I certainly have no idea how I did not become a pariah but I have yet to top that peak of stupidity and I still regret it 9 years on.

Also when I was five I accidentily burned the print off my thumb with a car's cigarette lighter.

[Ibrahim]

something particularly disturbing