Nastiest prank

[Oaty]

Just wondering whats the meanest thing people here have done to there spouse or someone they were dating.

Well tonight at dinner the onion story came about and heres what happened. This happened quite a few years ago before we were married. I was cooking dinner and had half an onion leftover. You know that little devel that floats over your shoulder well he told me to eat that onion. I then proceded into the living room and gave her a big fat kiss, giveing her quit a shock. I think it killed her tastes buds for about 2 days. As for me I'm nearly immune to onions.

Heres another from a boss I had a few years ago. He had eaten something sppicy for dinner. Shortly afterwards forgetting what he had ate, he tried to add a little SPICE to the romance. Well he sure added the spice but in the wrong way as she was burning hot in the right place in the wrong way

[Ja'chyra]

I married her

[Fragony]

A friend told me a true story of woman's sadism. His mother actually. Supposedly his mother (when they were teens) once whispered in his fathers ear 'if you come at my house at 8 o'clock there will be nobody home'. His father of course went, but nobody opened the door. When he asked where she was the next day she replied :'I told you there was nobody home at 8 o'clock'

[Parmenio]

Table for two in a posh restaurant in London:

Her: There is nothing you can say to embrass me.

Him: (raised voice) Two hundred pounds You must be joking - stands and leaves the restaurant.

Later, outside:

Her: Bastard

[Papewaio]

I hope the guy was looking at the menu when he said that otherwise the lady would look like a hooker...

[Fragony]

nice work doctor Watson

[Lord Ovaat]

Within five years of marrying my second wife, I went completely blind from cataracts and totally deaf. While both have been corrected (mostly) from surgery and implants, let's see you guys beat that

[ElmarkOFear]

My mean thing had to do with my wife's engagement ring.

We had looked for a month and she finally found one she really liked. I told her I was gonna put a down payment on it the next day. I did put the downpayment on it, but I called her and told her that there was a flaw in the diamond and we would have to find another ring. I even took her around to look at rings to make sure she believed me.

A week later, we went on a vacation to the Great Smokey Mountains with my entire family (40 people). Everyone knew I was going to ask my wife to marry me that weekend, except my wife, because she was still under the impression I had not bought a ring yet.

Well I drove her up in the mountains at nighttime and stopped at an overlook which was right above the town of Gatlinburg, Tennessee. The lights were glowing in the valley, and we were holding hands and watching the beautiful spectacle below us. I then got a very serious look on my face, turned toward her and began;

Honey, I have something important to tell you . . .

She looked up at me with concern, when she noticed the look on my face.

I then told her; I'm sorry, but I haven't been exactly honest with you these past few weeks . .

Her eyes went big, and I could see her mind was racing, thinking of the worst . . . . .Has he met another woman? . . . Does he not love me? . . . Is he a homosexual?

I then got down on one knee very quickly, grabbed her hand and asked her if she would marry me.

Realizing now, what the lie had been, she pulled me up and lunged into my embrace and shouted; Yes, Yes, Yes



Mean? Yes Effective? Definitely and I have been surprising her ever since.

[BDC]

You should have said I'm gay and leaving you for your brother.. first. Might get a slap then...

[A.Saturnus]

Well, I told that before but before we were together my ex-gf was a very good student, dedicated to do an academic career and rarely touched a glass of wine. Now, after our relationship, she has certifications that she´s mentally ill, is unmotivated and addicted to drugs.
Not that I did any major pranks to her, but it shines a bad light on our relation, doesn´t it?

[Kaiser of Arabia]

LOL This thread is TOO funny.
No signifigant others for me, just me, all alone, and lonely.
J/K.
If I hear one I'll post it.
-Capo

[Beirut]

Oaty,

Good grief. That's the only other time I've heard of that one. I ate a pizza with my customary huge amount of cayenne and crushed chilis on it, and then proceeding to the room, we engaged ourselves in...other matters.

My God did she freak

Do you want me to stop?

No.

[BDC]

You could spray pepper spray in your mouth first.

[ElmarkOFear]

You sure she didn't Mace you Beirut? hehe :) You don't think we are going to fall for the old; I ate hot peppers and . . . line do ya?

[frogbeastegg]

:reads thread, eyes begin to water: I suppose this is my punishment for laughing at that man in the great balls of fire thread.

Nastiest thing I ever did to goldfish, I would say giving him my phone number but he would disagree with that. Hmmm...ok then, one day he came down to vist me and he dozed off. I decided he had a good reason, so I just left him and went to do something else. About an hour later I heard the front door, so I went and prodded him in the ribs until he woke up. The daft lump does this stupidly happy smile on waking up, I soon fix that by telling him my parents just got home. The look of unqiue horror that replaced that dopey grin was quite...exquisite.

He's still annoyed about that, he says I shouldn't have left him asleep for so long, and that I shouldn't try to give him heart failure. He also blames me for the fact he was so groggy he tripped over as he was entering the dining room, right in front of two astonished froggy parents who then proceeded to comment on how tired he looks, how he needs to take more water with his booze, and so on. The frog maintains her innocence in the entire matter.

EDIT: I should probably add that his reason for being asleep was the long evening shifts he had been working.

[ElmarkOFear]

I think Frog just won the nasty contest hehe Poor Goldfish