Think Of Your Own Total War Unit

[Ianofsmeg16]

smeg legions!!! need i say any more?
we are armed with high tech laser bazookoids and ride around in an out of date star freighter named starbug.....kick yo ass!!!

[Evil_Maniac From Mars]

Evil's Light Infantry

Very strong troops with tons of stamina. Encased in titanium armour. Mini-nukes instead of hand grenades, but their special anti-radiation blasts make them impervious. Also armed with assault sniper rifles with mini-nuke launchers. Have tiny Jewish Zealot knives which can instantly slay anyone.

Now have nightmares about my heavy infantry.....

[Cebrus]

Nile Crocodiles
They work by the same principle as wardogs. But instead of routing just the enemy the also rout all of your units. What results is a chain reaction of routs that spreads across the entire battlefield. Ironically, the crocs are just not fast enough to catch anyone.

Fallout Fanbase
The most hysterical and hard-to-satisfy group of fans ever. Run around the map upturning every tree and razing every city to make the game look more like Fallout.

[Colovion]

Legion of Forks
Slow. Heavy armour. Fat. Reduces moral. Each general assigned to guide them will, over a number of turns, gain the "Lazy" and "Glutton" traits. The food in the region of this unit is depleted ever so quickly and the populace begins to post signs on the walls saying "Death to the Forks" and "Forks!? We don't want em!" On the battlefield the best tactic against them is to destroy them before they eat all of the food in the area. When you click on them they say "Use the Forks" for their prompt. Sometimes on the battlefield they get a rumbly tumbly and begin feasting on any nearby elephants, dogs or enemy soldiers. Don't put them near any unit you care about, this unit is renound for their flatulence and burping that has been known to deforest entire regions.

[Brutus]

My new Elite BMS (Brabanconne Mercenary Soldiers) will loot any place once they get there. Not only will this increase your treasury, but any spare money they will instantly spend on more alcohol. Their breath will rout any unit within 20 metres and kill any within 5. Also, their inclination to sing very, very badly when drunk will make the population of entire cities beg you to be enslaved and be send to the other side of your empire.

Therefore, however, they are extremely unfit for garrison duty.

[Kagemusha]

Kagemushas Stinky hangover bastards.(KMSHOB.)
These guys cripple any economies by eating all fastfood reserves and drinking all liquids they stamble upon.This can lead to many disastrous things.Also their hidious looks and terrible smell can and will break down any deacent human beeing.(Tested on humans.)

[British Mutt + Viking]

I would just add in a good ol' British Rugby team unit for the British in RTW and MTW:VI, a unit of rough and ready gits who will politely challenge the enemy to a game with nice clean uniforms, beat the bloody hell of each other, and leave the field in bloody, tattered, and filthy uniforms. The Rugby players would then invite the enemy to drinks at the pub. The idea is to make it possible to weaken your enemy and not have to go to full scale war. He will be beaten up from the game, drunk from the beers, and have to put down a bloody rebellion by the dry-cleaners in all his provinces and cities when they see the uniforms they are told to clean. Not to mention, all the people who will have lost their bets on the home-team will go bonkers when they find out they lost.

[Azi Tohak]

Azi's Drunk ________ Fans

The ______ can be fans of American Football, Soccer, Rugby, Cricket (I guess, or do their drunks just fall asleep?) or any other sport where people find drinking to be more entertaining than the game itself.

Their off (both tune and lyrics) ballads are sure to strengthen any nearby units. However, in battle they are pretty much worthless (think Sparabara from RTR) unless confronted by a similar foe unit. Then will ensue a brawl which would range through any bars on the map, finally ending with both sides in the local jail, where they proceed to make up (as they sober up) and decide to find another unit to go kick the crap out of.

Azi

[edyzmedieval]

Tracy McGrady

The best basketball player, better than Jordan!!!

[Muska Burnt]

it would be cool to see some hoplite where they form up like a hegdehog with pikes in a 360 so they can't get flanked

[Mongoose]

The REAL Ultimate Ninja!!!1!

Ninjas can kill anyone they want! Ninjas cut off heads ALL the time and don't even think twice about it. These guys are so crazy and awesome that they flip out ALL the time.

I love that site.

And if you don't think that they have real, ultimate power, you need to get a life before they cut your head off.

[Colovion]

it would be cool to see some hoplite where they form up like a hegdehog with pikes in a 360 so they can't get flanked

yeah and create something like the swiss did with their hedgehog of pikes covering their archers/ranged soldiers

[Muska Burnt]

o my idea already taken i wouldn't know since i never palyed m:tw

[King Arthur]

I have the ultimate unit which will destroy any other....
the English football hooligan unit ... indestructible

is constantly drunk = good stamina (if it wasn't for his beer belly)

can sustain power water pump attacks from local police.

may charge without orders.(takes orders from nobody ,not even Sven Goran Erikson)

poor armour protection = is often seen in foreign football tournament hosting countries , wearing nothing on his top.

but good charge bonus especially against enemy police.

good at fighting in any weather = because he is up for a ruck at any time

English stiff upper lip = will not rout they will fight to death.

cannot sap = as he doesn't take orders

fervent nationalism= their pride for their country lead them to take any opportunity at fighting Johnny foreigner for his country.

I am as it happens English but i don't mind poking fun at myself

[Arrowhead]

The Arrowmasters. A mix of archers. Light archers, heavy archers and medium archers. 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 unit size.
Very very veryveryveryveryveryveryvery VERY Hardy.Very very veryveryveryveryveryveryvery VERY Fast.
Very very veryveryveryveryveryveryvery VERY good stamina.
Each man has 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 arrows and 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 mini nukes.Oh and they have the strength of 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 men. And are as good at fighting with swords as 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 men. And one man's armour was forged by 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 men. Each man has the morale of 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Arrowmasters. I think thats all...

[ichi]

ichi's fire crew, the ability to shoot fire into enemy formations, the lay fire on the ground to burn through enemy formations, produce smoke to obscure troop movements, and destroy forested areas to remove hiding places. Armed with axes, chainsaws, and shovels for melee combact. Unruly and expensive, this unit must have access to coffee.

Mrs ichi proposed the household faction, which includes giant walking flyswatters (little legs, swatting anything in front of them, they get the Evil Star Wars Theme, da dant da da) playing as they march, and a similar broom unit to sweep the area clean of debris post battle. Any gold that comes near her is instantly transformed into jewelry.

ichi

undoubtedly the best thread in many weeks

[Arrowhead]

ichi's fire crew, the ability to shoot fire into enemy formations, the lay fire on the ground to burn through enemy formations, produce smoke to obscure troop movements, and destroy forested areas to remove hiding places. Armed with axes, chainsaws, and shovels for melee combact. Unruly and expensive, this unit must have access to coffee.

Mrs ichi proposed the household faction, which includes giant walking flyswatters (little legs, swatting anything in front of them, they get the Evil Star Wars Theme, da dant da da) playing as they march, and a similar broom unit to sweep the area clean of debris post battle. Any gold that comes near her is instantly transformed into jewelry.

ichi

undoubtedly the best thread in many weeks

Hold on. Don't tell me. The fire crew can cook burritos on their flamethrowers?

[Drisos]

The Ichi-drisos/drisos-Ichi chef unit.

Excellent chef for in an army. Ability to microwave burrito's. Can power up soldiers simply by creating a meal.

Copyright

ingredients: etc, etc.

Use at your own risk. We are not responsible for any failed burrito's.

Drisos company.

[ichi]

Hold on. Don't tell me. The fire crew can cook burritos on their flamethrowers?

you take your burrito and place it on your shovel, then hold the shovel over the fire. Works best if you smoke while it cooks.

ichi

[Abokasee]

WORM
From worms 3D

These worm are very dangorus and are equiped with every weopon of the past,present and future! 200 hitpoints attack varies on weopon defence N/A

[Jimmytwohand]

International Politicians

Pits all of the above against each other and then plays bridge and drinks port to decide who becomes overlord of the blood drenched, lightly smoking ruins of Earth. Bow down before my protracted debates and ludicrous quantities of paperwork!

PS Hello all.

[Abokasee]

NUKER ROCKETEER MACHINE GUNNER

THESE TOTALY OWN COS THEY FIRE 100 NUKE ROCKETS A SECOND BOW TO NUKULAR OWER

[Somebody Else]

War-mice. A low upkeep unit, that causes havoc amongst enemy elephant units. As they are very small, they are almost impossible to hit. Also effective against screaming women.

[Enoch]

Enoch the great, living among gods and trained in their arts. Walks the earth to deal justice where it is needed. On the battlefield he is a solitary warrior against his enemy.
By his voice they cower.
By his word destruction rains from the heavens.
By his command the ground opens and receives its prey.
By his stare death is distributed unsparingly.
By his mind nothing physical can harm him.
By his touch the world goes under; sic transit gloria mundi.

[Lemur]

The Fightin' Lemurs

They're prosimian and angry about it. I know, I know, they don't sound very threatening, but do you really want to face off against this?

[Papewaio]

Anything that large that can sit in a tree and poop on me is something to fear.

[Crazed Rabbit]

The Airborne Lawyers. You airdrop them into enemy countries in large numbers, and they wreck havoc on the efficiency and production of everything in the country.

And if the first wave doesn't work, you give the second wave parachutes.

Crazed Rabbit

[British Mutt + Viking]

On a more serious note, as I look at the units in this game, I find there is only one type of unit that is really under-represented in most of the games, & that is those who can conceal in the open (or more easily in trees). I have personally rigged several unit types to conceal in the open, but only those which have special reasons to, like celtic-warriors which were famed for their ability to literally rise from the very earth (they didn't mind sleeping on dirt, & they had no trouble sleeping directly in it either!) to ambush enemy columns.

[Advo-san]

The Airborne Lawyers. You airdrop them into enemy countries in large numbers, and they wreck havoc on the efficiency and production of everything in the country.

And if the first wave doesn't work, you give the second wave parachutes.

Crazed Rabbit

An office full of lawyers here found it a damn fine idea!!

[Advo-san]

Archbishops and foot Archbishops

These light armoured, armed with gospels, bearded units when unleached in the battlefield will start to sexually harass enemy soldiers, causing them to flee. During sieges, you can have them stick their foot in their mouth (thus creating the mighty foot archbishops), which allows them to chant so bad that the besieged force will HAVE to surrender immediately.