View Full Version : How wrong is it to fall in love with a girl who has a boyfriend...
Mete Han
03-17-2008, 22:04
... and then try to seperate them or seduce her somehow? What if she is really beatiful?
Strike For The South
03-17-2008, 22:09
Do what you want but you'll probably end up with your head and heart crushed but you'll never know until you try.
ICantSpellDawg
03-17-2008, 22:11
I did it once when I was in high school. It was fun at the time, but then she eventually broke it off with him after we did it a few times and left me for some other dude. Don't waste your time on cheaters. They will do the same to you. Its wrong because it tends to hurt you in the end.
2 cents from an old fogy in training.
Mete Han
03-17-2008, 22:12
Do what you want but you'll probably end up with your head and heart crushed but you'll never know until you try.
the worst thing is that I have to work with her for some project. I am not in love but I might lose control, cause she is just the right type but I I guess I can control it though...
ICantSpellDawg
03-17-2008, 22:13
Fart around her alot, then you won't have the issue anymore.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
03-17-2008, 22:14
I believe it's wrong, for a few reasons:
1) If she's willing to do that, she's casual in that respect, or a slut. You don't want that.
2) If you go around trying to ruin their relationship, either you'll make both of them hate you, she'll refuse and not tell him, or you'll end up with a person who will change boyfriends at a whim, which you probably don't want.
3) It's just wrong. Think of how you would feel. It sounds like a cliche, but it's relevant.
Mete Han
03-17-2008, 22:14
Fart around her alot, then you won't have the issue anymore.
great advice :yes:
Mete Han
03-17-2008, 22:16
I believe it's wrong, for a few reasons:
1) If she's willing to do that, she's casual in that respect, or a slut. You don't want that.
2) If you go around trying to ruin their relationship, either you'll make both of them hate you, she'll refuse and not tell him, or you'll end up with a person who will change boyfriends at a whim, which you probably don't want.
3) It's just wrong. Think of how you would feel. It sounds like a cliche, but it's relevant.
yeah maybe in time I might get my chance but then I can be with someone else but anyway I guess you're right
Strike For The South
03-17-2008, 22:18
the worst thing is that I have to work with her for some project. I am not in love but I might lose control, cause she is just the right type but I I guess I can control it though...
Dude after some trouble earlier in the year I had an ephinay and with it I realized Im the most enlightend man on the planet. there are plenty of girls out there you have to remeber two things.
1. Women are fickle evil creatures who do nothing but suck your life force. They lie cheat and steal they are the lowest form of human life. So just rember this
2. There will alwyas be another no matter what remeber that.
However this is countered by the fact
1. There soft
2. they smell nice
The most logical thing is of course to wait it out, which basically means you'll loose interest, and suddenly your problem is gone. And another girl will catch your interest.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
03-17-2008, 22:19
If she breaks up with him on her own, on the other hand, just go for it. Also, if he seems to be a terrible boyfriend (from a neutral perspective) then you could probably justify it.
Why don't just leave her alone? Go to the plaza, go out to discos or something. You will find something better.
Mete Han
03-17-2008, 22:23
If she breaks up with him on her own, on the other hand, just go for it. Also, if he seems to be a terrible boyfriend (from a neutral perspective) then you could probably justify it.
I don't know the guy and actually I just met her a few hours ago... probably in the morning I'll feel nothing. but she is really sweet with fair hair and green eyes and every sweet little thing. She ain't sexy though, she is actually sweet and beatiful.
Mete Han
03-17-2008, 22:27
1. Women are fickle evil creatures who do nothing but suck your life force. They lie cheat and steal they are the lowest form of human life. So just rember this
I guess this is the exact reason I want to go for it, You know have fun for a few when you are really in love and then get rid of her. I hate attachment and the dark side of my personaility is that when someone starts to control me I want to destroy them in any context.
Yes women suck your life force, and they don't even respect total war!!!
Hey! Adultery and relationship destruction, even in the conspiratorial stage, are Frontroom affairs. :inquisitive:
If loving you is wrong, I don't wanna be right ... (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuk8j_uFNGo&feature=related)
Dont think about him - think about her. Opponent does not exist - objective is important.
Big_John
03-17-2008, 23:23
i wouldn't call it "wrong" per se. but it is poor form, imo, and something i'd never want to do to a good relationship.
but listen to Tuff. if she'll bail on him for you, she's not worth any emotional attachment on your part.
Geoffrey S
03-17-2008, 23:32
Nothing wrong. Treat her as a friend, invite her along to things, stay friends. If she likes you she's sure to show it, then it's up to you what to do with that.
Hey! Adultery and relationship destruction, even in the conspiratorial stage, are Frontroom affairs. :inquisitive:
But It doesn't fit at all.
Women who cheat are nothing but trouble. Best thing you can do is get her out your head or atleast wait until they break it off.
Tribesman
03-18-2008, 02:38
If she's willing to do that, she's casual in that respect, or a slut. You don't want that.
Why not ? sluts are fun .
ICantSpellDawg
03-18-2008, 02:55
Pile-drive her, then give her the people's elbow. If she doesn't tell on you, then you'll know she's true.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
03-18-2008, 03:38
Why not ? sluts are fun .
I mean he doesn't want that for a lasting relationship. I'm not even going to presume that he's going think about breaking up a relationship just for a night with her, because I don't believe he's selfish, at least not to that rather extreme extent.
If she were single, that would be another matter.
Samurai Waki
03-18-2008, 04:39
Be Friendly around her, if she wants to hang out, only hang out casually, reject her advances. If she wants to hang out and her boyfriend is with her, be the bigger better man. If she loves her boyfriend she won't try anything, if she's with him because she doesn't know what to do, then she'll be honest and forthright. You need to gauge her reactions, and read them very..very carefully. Or if you the Seducer Type just have your fling and be done with her... after all you won't have to deal with the consequences unless her boyfriend happens to be the violent jealous type (like me):beam:
Why not ? sluts are fun .
:smash:
Lord Winter
03-18-2008, 05:45
https://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b314/whitehottears/Random/Random_WomenevilLogic.jpg
seireikhaan
03-18-2008, 06:01
https://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b314/whitehottears/Random/Random_WomenevilLogic.jpg
I don't think I've ever seen the equation so succinctly summed up. :smile:
If it's a friend of you it's wrong, otherwise fair game
Adrian II
03-18-2008, 10:35
Sound advice all round. And completely useless, at least when you're madly in love and not a complete weasel. Go for her, I say, even if it is mission impossible.
It doesn't sound like she's a slut at all. Besides, sluts can be fun indeed, Foxache. :yes:
macsen rufus
03-18-2008, 10:49
How wrong is it to fall in love with a girl who has a boyfriend...
not sure if right or wrong comes into it.... but maybe ask the Trojans if it's worth the hassle :clown:
My girlfriend was engaged to another man when we met. The mutual attraction was, as it turned out, instant for the both of us. However neither of us acted on it, or even admitted to it, for a good long time. It was obvious though that her relationship was failing, the love was gone and they were both just treading water. Finally she admitted her feelings to me, and I to her. The next day she broke up her engagement and relationship of four years, despite the risk of significant fallout.
Thing is that I didn't have to seduce her or to steal her from another man. She let herself go because she wanted to. I didn't see her one day and take her the next - our friendship grew until it was so much more than the relationship she was in. We didn't fool around behind anyone's back and no one was betrayed, though obviously someone was hurt anyway.
I would say that if you met a girl yesterday, fancy her today and then attempt to take her tomorrow then you are indeed in the wrong. You know nothing of her, of her situation, of her current relationship. Nothing. You don't know what you are getting into, what you may be damaging, what your chances of success are or even if it is truly worth it. That is the action of a man after a one-night-stand, and there are better targets for those urges than a girl who is already in a relationship.
KukriKhan
03-18-2008, 12:45
Now that we've garnered some backroom reaction, we'll move this to its natural home: the Frontroom of Peace, Love, and Grooviness.
KukriKhan
03-18-2008, 13:04
How wrong is it to fall in love with a girl who has a boyfriend...
... and then try to seperate them or seduce her somehow? What if she is really beatiful?
The "fall in love" part, you can't control. The "try to seperate them or seduce her somehow" bit is wrong. You wouldn't take the guy's lunch just because it's sitting in front of you. You wouldn't just take his car... leave his girl alone. (Quoth the Old Coot).
Or be totally upfront and honest; tell him: "Hey, I have a crush on your girlfriend. No offense. She sure looks nice to me."
That way you're admiring her and him both, without trying to steal.
About 10 years ago, I had a girlfriend.
One of my best friends fell in love with her and he seduced her on some party.
Words cannot describe the anger you feel at such a moment. It's the only time in my life (well, except for a few boxing matches with my brother and one fight with a bully in my childhood, but those hardly count) that I lost my selfcontrol and actually punched a guy in the face.
Leave them be. I think being cheated on in a serious relationship is one of the worst things that can happen to you. It's horrible.
Vladimir
03-18-2008, 13:16
If she's really beautiful, go for it! Just remember that she'll leave you soon because some guy will eventually do to you what you did to her old boyfriend.
Back when the Earth was flat, one of my buddies hooked up with a chick who looked like an 18 year-old Elizabeth Taylor. I looked at her and knew in one second flat what the future held. A year or two later when I was a wee bit drunk at a party, I told her I was going to have her if it took twenty-years.
It took eight.
Never forget, though, you will face the consequences of your actions. Never doubt that.
Yes and no.
It's not odd to "have feelings" for someone who is in a relationship, and I don't think it's necessarily bad to go after someone in a relationship either. It's just not gentlemanly ... not fair play.
Mete Han
03-18-2008, 17:54
If it's a friend of you it's wrong, otherwise fair game
no I don't know the guy actually I just met her yesterday and before that we were perfect strangers. I dunno, I guess I will just wait to see what happens. Today when woke up I felt like I wont fall in love but I couldn't sleep until 4 am. So she has this aura that affects me but I can control it. After all I have bitter experiences.
Vladimir
03-18-2008, 18:20
no I don't know the guy actually I just met her yesterday and before that we were perfect strangers. I dunno, I guess I will just wait to see what happens. Today when woke up I felt like I wont fall in love but I couldn't sleep until 4 am. So she has this aura that affects me but I can control it. After all I have bitter experiences.
Sounds more like lust than love; I'm not sure how the translation to Turkish would go. Think about what you would do with her once you "had" her. Try to develop a relationship and see if she feels the same.
Artorius Maximus
03-18-2008, 20:07
If I found out a beautiful girl was already in love with some other guy, I'd probably stay out of their affairs, and just wait until I find another girl I like. But my opinion could change over time...
pevergreen
03-18-2008, 23:59
Well, I did that exact thing.
I felt terribly guilty even though we are still very happy with each other.
She ended it with him before anything happened between us.
The circumstances turned out to be in my favour:
He lived on the other side of the city
She only saw him once a week
She didnt like him, she just didnt have a reason to break it off.
Mete Han
03-19-2008, 00:08
Sounds more like lust than love; I'm not sure how the translation to Turkish would go. Think about what you would do with her once you "had" her. Try to develop a relationship and see if she feels the same.
Actually it is greed rather than lust for I hardly find her sexy. She is sweet and beautiful though and I am just obsessed with that particular type. However, I dont feel the way I felt yesterday, it is just that I am obsessed.
Mouzafphaerre
03-19-2008, 04:35
.
Nice to meet a fellow obsessive countryman. :freak:
.
... and then try to seperate them or seduce her somehow? What if she is really beatiful?
Ethically speaking, it is very wrong.
Evolutionarily and scientifically speaking, it's natural and expected.
My advice is you beat her guy up real bad, show her who the stronger one is so she will make love with you instead. If he turns out to be stronger, try to escape, there are other girls in the world and they're not worth too much effort, you might get emotionally attached or something. Always remember you're the alpha male, you're the guy and if anyone wants the same girl, beat the :daisy: out of him, it's only natural, science supports this. But keep in mind that if you take too many hits, no girl's worth that, they're only girls, you know.
You can get the best advice by watching Animal Planet or Planet of the Apes by the way, awesome documentaries if you want to know how this whole dating stuff works, can only recommend them. Now may the stronger one prevail and you better drop her when I come along. ~:wave:
Mouzafphaerre
03-19-2008, 13:10
.
:laugh4: Satire meets the satyr. :yes:
.
ICantSpellDawg
03-19-2008, 15:24
piledriver was good advice.
Ethically speaking, it is very wrong.
Why, if she's worth the trouble gaining her she's worth keeping as well. If it would mean tearing apart a family for your own shortlived pleassure ok, but if there is mutual attraction go for it unless it's a friend of yours.
Mete Han
03-19-2008, 18:47
My advice is you beat her guy up:elephant: :elephant: real bad, show her who the stronger one is so she will make love with you instead. If he turns out to be stronger, try to escape, there are other girls in the world and they're not worth too much effort, you might get emotionally attached or something. Always remember you're the alpha male, you're the guy and if anyone wants the same girl, beat the :daisy: out of him, it's only natural, science supports this. But keep in mind that if you take too many hits, no girl's worth that, they're only girls, you know.
You can get the best advice by watching Animal Planet or Planet of the Apes by the way, awesome documentaries if you want to know how this whole dating stuff works, can only recommend them. Now may the stronger one prevail and you better drop her when I come along. ~:wave:
okay I'll see her tommorrow. she is going to visit the company (at which I am an intern) and be there for the whole day but for a project that has nothing to do with me. I will keep you posted about the life in the zoo.
:elephant:
Mete Han
03-19-2008, 18:50
.
Nice to meet a fellow obsessive countryman. :freak:
.
You know how rarely we get those blonds in this country even in Mikligarðr.
LeftEyeNine
03-20-2008, 05:56
Or be totally upfront and honest; tell him: "Hey, I have a crush on your girlfriend. No offense. She sure looks nice to me."
That way you're admiring her and him both, without trying to steal.
Kukri-sensei, this country's men can't dare saying "kiss your wife for me" (which is not offensive unless you say it while licking your lips over there, iirc). Therefore, being that honest would be a pain in the ass. Literally.
Mr. Adanılıyıh Allahın Adamıyıh,
1- You never heard of the saying "Olacağı varsa olur" ? Why mess with someone else's relationship? If she likes you more while you two are together, she'll break up eventually and there you go. That's all about it. Meanwhile be a good guy with manners -not a "nice" one like a puppy. Olacağı varsa olur. :2thumbsup:
You know how rarely we get those blonds in this country even in Mikligarðr.
"Rarely" is too much, ain't it ? We got a good blend over here, me thinks. (no no, I'm not talking about painted coquettes)
Mete Han
03-20-2008, 18:00
Kukri-sensei, Why mess with someone else's relationship?
Life is short and I am obsessed. But I won't mess their relationship, I hope.
I am not those kind of Adanali who goes around saying Allahin Adamiyih. Turcoman blood runs in my veins.
But thanx anyway.
Mouzafphaerre
03-20-2008, 18:13
You know how rarely we get those blonds in this country even in Mikligarðr.
.
You take me back 16-17 years to high school. And that was a real one! :yes:
.
LeftEyeNine
03-20-2008, 18:26
Life is short and I am obsessed. But I won't mess their relationship, I hope.
I am not those kind of Adanali who goes around saying Allahin Adamiyih. Turcoman blood runs in my veins.
But thanx anyway.
Weirdly, everyone I met who is from Adana turned out to be nationalists. I guess you are all running away from the invasion there, eh ? Or do you still live there ?
And, yes, don't mess with their relationship. It's not that hard to knot your...uh..hormones.
Abokasee
03-20-2008, 19:11
.
:laugh4: Satire meets the satyr. :yes:
.
I see no use in the ability to balance a vase on your *todger*
Edit: The Previous rude might have got me another warning point
Edit2: Todger sounds a bit short for the vases on which satyr are on, are there another words?
Mete Han
03-20-2008, 21:52
Weirdly, everyone I met who is from Adana turned out to be nationalists. I guess you are all running away from the invasion there, eh ? Or do you still live there ?
And, yes, don't mess with their relationship. It's not that hard to knot your...uh..hormones.
I left home at an early age. I live in Istanbul but I will have to return soon. I am not just "some guy" from Adana. We are bound to each other. The invaders will learn to obey.
ADANA VICTRIX
Mouzafphaerre
03-21-2008, 02:34
I left home at an early age. I live in Istanbul but I will have to return soon. I am not just "some guy" from Adana. We are bound to each other. The invaders will learn to obey.
ADANA VICTRIX
.
I should watch my back closer in the streets. :stare:
.
Spartan198
03-21-2008, 07:55
If you think she's in a bad relationship,there's absolutely nothing wrong with it.
https://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b314/whitehottears/Random/Random_WomenevilLogic.jpg
So true.
doc_bean
03-21-2008, 09:10
All is fair in love and war, even if the saying is no longer true in the second case.
Just make sure you consider the price you'll pay for your actions, if you're willing to accept that, go for it. Life is short, try to make it interesting.
Abokasee
03-21-2008, 14:55
https://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b314/whitehottears/Random/Random_WomenevilLogic.jpg
You seem to have hit the nail on the head
Mete Han
03-21-2008, 17:51
.
I should watch my back closer in the streets. :stare:
.
you know I did not mean anything like that...
Mete Han
03-21-2008, 17:57
All is fair in love and war, even if the saying is no longer true in the second case.
Just make sure you consider the price you'll pay for your actions, if you're willing to accept that, go for it. Life is short, try to make it interesting.
I mean what kind of price? What could happen even in the worst case? Both she and her boy are perfect strangers. I mean I am speaking hypothetically for I guess won't do anything rash. In the worst scenario she would not talk to me again.. well, that is actually very bad!!!
Vladimir
03-21-2008, 18:06
You could get your camel beat, or stabbed.
Mouzafphaerre
03-21-2008, 18:40
you know I did not mean anything like that...
.
Better safe than sorry... :freak:
.
doc_bean
03-21-2008, 21:41
I mean what kind of price? What could happen even in the worst case? Both she and her boy are perfect strangers. I mean I am speaking hypothetically for I guess won't do anything rash. In the worst scenario she would not talk to me again.. well, that is actually very bad!!!
Well then the price seems pretty low, go for it !
Craterus
03-21-2008, 21:44
If you were to go for it, what exactly is your plan?
LeftEyeNine
03-21-2008, 22:48
If you were to go for it, what exactly is your plan?
- Good morning
- Hey..
- Eat me.
Veho Nex
03-22-2008, 00:54
Women are... in my best experience... something that wraps around you like a snake and forces everything from you. Why not be an above the average man and believe that until the moment you believe you are contempt women were put on this earth for mans enjoyment.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
03-22-2008, 02:14
https://img137.imageshack.us/img137/3445/21146212759ey9.gif
Mouzafphaerre
03-22-2008, 05:40
.
:laugh4:
.
Mete Han
03-22-2008, 09:07
Well then the price seems pretty low, go for it !
I still don't get it? Do you think like I am going to have a conscience problem, no way. No body cared about me when my heart was broken. The only reason I ain't going for it immediately is the fact that probably it won't work.
Mete Han
03-22-2008, 09:22
If you were to go for it, what exactly is your plan?
Well, you see I met her in order to help her with some project. Actually my boss asked me to help her. That was monday evening. Later she started to completely ignore me. Maybe she must be asking herself how wrong is it to manipulate people with her beauty to get what she wants and then walk away?
The plan? There is no plan until I meet her again. the probability that she is enjoying her relationship actually ties my hands. After all I can't dig into that matter with emails or on the phone. And I cant force her to meet me since this is her project and she decides if she wants help or not.
I think I am going to find another one in order to overcome this fixation.
What would your plan be?
Craterus
03-22-2008, 14:01
I think I am going to find another one in order to overcome this fixation.
I'd say that's a pretty good plan.
However, if you're desperate to have this one, my plan would be to just be friendly when you're working with her. That's about all you can do. Especially considering you only just met her, she's already involved (to some extent, I gather?) and she doesn't seem to have shown any interest.
If you think she did show some interest then maybe it's worth doing something more drastic. But I'd say you can just be a friend for now and see what happens. ~:)
LeftEyeNine
03-22-2008, 16:32
No body cared about me when my heart was broken.
So you think the same negligence is valid for you too ?
That's something like the common story: "I used to be such a lovefool for a girl once. She just dumped me. And I've understood that I have to act like a bastard ever after and now girls are only means of sex for me"
If you have a "way" that can be manipulated at the very first misfortune, just give up that way from the very beginning. Weak.
It doesn't mean that you should hit back for no one had cared about you when you had a heart break once.
That's way behind what I call "having principles". My 2 cents though. Have good luck hunting.
:bow:
Ravencroft
03-24-2008, 08:17
Don't man. There's someone other than she who's better.
Plus , like what they say, cheaters will cheat on you too.
Mete Han
03-24-2008, 18:27
okay it is wrong to cheat. on the other hand she said she wants to meet me tommorow and she invited me to her place. It is kinda hard but I will try repress the rush. after all she probably doesnt have any intentions for she is kind of naive. but then when a man thinks that a girl is naive then it means he is doomed to suffer. women are very effective in deception.
what the hell am I getting myself into?
what the hell am I getting myself into?
You're one of but millions of men who have uttered this question, my friend (and you certainly won't be the last). ~;)
All you can really do is play it by ear and see what happens (if anything). Perhaps her intentions truly are innocent, but it's probably best to be wary unless/until that actually proves to be the case.
LeftEyeNine
03-24-2008, 19:32
on the other hand she said she wants to meet me tommorow and she invited me to her place
A girl who has a boyfriend invites you over to her place. Will it be "them" over there or only two of you?
The latter way, the girl will be a short adventure of yours.
but then when a man thinks that a girl is naive then it means he is doomed to suffer.
That's got less to do with girls being doomed and a lot more with men being evil.
Mete Han
03-24-2008, 19:58
A girl who has a boyfriend invites you over to her place. Will it be "them" over there or only two of you?
I think she said that only her room mate will be there. and you are a dj right? just please dont talk about this on air okay please?
LeftEyeNine
03-24-2008, 20:03
It's been months I quit that job, MH, no worries.
But seeing you have shared this with thousands, I don't see what you are up to. :smoking:
:clown:
Mete Han
03-24-2008, 20:11
It's been months I quit that job, MH, no worries.
But seeing you have shared this with thousands, I don't see what you are up to. :smoking:
:clown:
It is very unlikely that she is a Guild member. Also, I trust the Guild in a way. Actually there are no girls in the Guild, right? I mean look at the posts about love and you know what. I told only one person about my conflict and fixation out of the cyber......
Don Corleone
03-24-2008, 21:32
All depends on whether the boyfriend is a friend of yours or not. You can't break the guy code, but if he ain't one of your friends, all's fair in love and war... just be prepared to take a beating if he's bigger, crazier or better at fighting than you.
As for her being loose, I'm with Tribesman. Pro-slut since 1981...
Evil_Maniac From Mars
03-24-2008, 23:55
Actually there are no girls in the Guild, right?
A fair few for a gaming forum, actually.
All depends on whether the boyfriend is a friend of yours or not. You can't break the guy code, but if he ain't one of your friends, all's fair in love and war... just be prepared to take a beating if he's bigger, crazier or better at fighting than you.
Pay attention to these words. If anyone tried that on me, there wouldn't be very much left of him.
It comes down to your morals, Mete.
As for her being loose, I'm with Tribesman. Pro-slut since 1981...
I'm telling your wife. :laugh4:
Papewaio
03-25-2008, 05:28
As for her being loose, I'm with Tribesman. Pro-slut since 1981...
Or another way 'Marry your mistress before you find your wife.' :laugh4:
Mete Han
03-25-2008, 22:42
Pay attention to these words. If anyone tried that on me, there wouldn't be very much left of him.
at the end it turned out that I did not do anything stupid, when the rush came I controled it. She came over to my place instead. Another important thing is that I almost forgot what she looked like until she came over and I saw her again. Which means that all my agony was caused because of my fixation. Okay I though she was more beautiful the first time I met her and now even though I think she is less beautiful but still very... I told her that I really admire her self esteem and trusting charactere and that her boy is very lucky...
but I did not make a single move for which I am very proud because it is really difficult to control it when yoyu like someone so much. And it would be wrong if I did.
she said we should have dinner sometime and should see each other apart from the work. And I know she did not mean anything naughty.
I like her, respect her relationship and I am free of the fixation and the obsession now.
but I still have the chance and maybe some day.....
Evil_Maniac From Mars
03-25-2008, 23:08
Good for you, in my opinion. She will probably become more and more attractive to you over the next little while, and then it'll go away, more or less (this is from a past experience - not saying it's always true). It's quite possible to stay good friends with her, and your infatuation (I don't know a better word for that) will probably die down over that time, or at least be suppressed. On the other hand, if she breaks up with him, go for it, no matter if you still get the "OMG" feeling when you see her or not. :yes:
Mouzafphaerre
03-25-2008, 23:27
.
Lurk in the shadows and snap when the time is right (the other guy is gone). :yes:
.
Craterus
03-27-2008, 18:51
I think this thread is cursed.
Vladimir
03-27-2008, 19:12
at the end it turned out that I did not do anything stupid, when the rush came I controled it. She came over to my place instead. Another important thing is that I almost forgot what she looked like until she came over and I saw her again. Which means that all my agony was caused because of my fixation. Okay I though she was more beautiful the first time I met her and now even though I think she is less beautiful but still very... I told her that I really admire her self esteem and trusting charactere and that her boy is very lucky...
but I did not make a single move for which I am very proud because it is really difficult to control it when yoyu like someone so much. And it would be wrong if I did.
she said we should have dinner sometime and should see each other apart from the work. And I know she did not mean anything naughty.
I like her, respect her relationship and I am free of the fixation and the obsession now.
but I still have the chance and maybe some day.....
I'll have to re-evaluate my opinion about Turkish cultural norms. I thought you guys were more conservative than that. Are you sure she isn't interested in you? What was her eye contact and body language like? If you do eat out with her (gigity) try to get her talking about her relationship. Maybe she's not really interested in it any more.
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 06:05
I think this thread is cursed.
hey, come on !?! I did not do anything wrong...
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 06:22
I'll have to re-evaluate my opinion about Turkish cultural norms. I thought you guys were more conservative than that. Are you sure she isn't interested in you? What was her eye contact and body language like? If you do eat out with her (gigity) try to get her talking about her relationship. Maybe she's not really interested in it any more.
Turkish cultural norms??? what are they? plus as it is the case in most nations, Turkish nation also is not totally homogenous. And do you think an average Turkish guy would play TW and would be a Guild member? You really should visit Turkey.
she was kind a nervous when she first arrived. She said like would really like to finish the work quickly and go back like two or three times. I said the work matters so it must be finished no matter what and then she relaxed. Later she kept asking me questions like why I am choosing to help her. I tried to be the cool guy and reassured her that it is no big deal. Later I was reading this article on my lap. She put her hand on my thigh but I thought she was not aware of it. Her hand was really next to it. And it was so difficult to control myself in order to stop the erection. A few minutes later (which was like years to me) she suddenly and literally jumped away like half a meter. And she had this questioning look in her eyes but I pretended like nothing happened and kept reading. I guess I won her trust for real.
The thing is maybe working in my place is not such a good idea because she was like a football player with nerves at an away game. I hardly made her smile. It is easier to make her talk outside. And all the personal stuff we talked was when we were going back to her house. I mean I took her back.
One thing I discovered was she is really terrified with this project and she is looking for someone to help her. That's her motivation. But what is mine????
LeftEyeNine
03-28-2008, 14:34
That's her motivation. But what is mine????
Hand-on-lap erection ?
She jumped? You must be very uh, blessed :laugh4:
Vladimir
03-28-2008, 17:55
Turkish cultural norms??? what are they? plus as it is the case in most nations, Turkish nation also is not totally homogenous. And do you think an average Turkish guy would play TW and would be a Guild member? You really should visit Turkey.
she was kind a nervous when she first arrived. She said like would really like to finish the work quickly and go back like two or three times. I said the work matters so it must be finished no matter what and then she relaxed. Later she kept asking me questions like why I am choosing to help her. I tried to be the cool guy and reassured her that it is no big deal. Later I was reading this article on my lap. She put her hand on my thigh but I thought she was not aware of it. Her hand was really next to it. And it was so difficult to control myself in order to stop the erection. A few minutes later (which was like years to me) she suddenly and literally jumped away like half a meter. And she had this questioning look in her eyes but I pretended like nothing happened and kept reading. I guess I won her trust for real.
The thing is maybe working in my place is not such a good idea because she was like a football player with nerves at an away game. I hardly made her smile. It is easier to make her talk outside. And all the personal stuff we talked was when we were going back to her house. I mean I took her back.
One thing I discovered was she is really terrified with this project and she is looking for someone to help her. That's her motivation. But what is mine????
Wow, pretty complex. That could have been a test and I think you did the right thing by helping her with the work. I think you could have scored but you did the right thing. Ask Sinan!
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 19:11
Wow, pretty complex. That could have been a test and I think you did the right thing by helping her with the work. I think you could have scored but you did the right thing. Ask Sinan!
why, what did Sinan do? Get slapped? I think she is using me to get her job done.
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 19:16
Hand-on-lap erection ?
It hardly helps!!!
It hardly helps!!!
LOL. Poor Mete Han. :laugh4:
Still, I think you played it about as well as you could've -- and probably better than most, truth be told. If, as you suspect, she's mainly using you to help her complete the job, then it's definitely best that you play it cool. If her interest in you *does* extend beyond that, it's still probably just as well that you're acting nonchalant about the whole thing. While I don't claim to understand women very well, one thing I have noticed about them is that they seem to want you more if you ignore them and/or act as if you're not interested. :shrug:
I'd say just keep going as you have, at least for now.
Vladimir
03-28-2008, 20:07
why, what did Sinan do? Get slapped? I think she is using me to get her job done.
Too many puns in such a short post. Learn from the Master (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=98806).
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 20:13
LOL. Poor Mete Han.
one thing I have noticed about them is that they seem to want you more if you ignore them and/or act as if you're not interested. :shrug:
exactly it's like when she takes 1 step you can take 0.9 steps... however Ithink by saying that she has a very lucky boyfriend which means I wanna be in his place, I broke that rule. She should be in doubt whether you want her or not... The thing that makes the whole thing so difficult is the other guy. They might not break up for a very long time and I am craving for her. And i I take a big step she might back off just to prove that she is not a slut. Women.... :wall:
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 20:33
Too many puns in such a short post. Learn from the Master (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=98806).
wow. so what happenned in the end???
Vladimir
03-28-2008, 20:35
Sinan gets the girl. He always gets the girl.
Then usually throws her away after :thumbsdown:
Mete Han
03-28-2008, 20:43
Sinan gets the girl. He always gets the girl.
Then usually throws her away after :thumbsdown:
by the way it was you who told me to read geza gardonyi's book right?
Vladimir
03-28-2008, 21:12
No. The books I read are far more boring.
RoadKill
03-30-2008, 03:44
There are 3.8 billion women in the world. Thats more then enough for your penis to choose from, horny basturd.
:clown: Don't Ban me.
Mete Han
03-30-2008, 10:04
There are 3.8 billion women in the world. Thats more then enough for your penis to choose from, horny basturd.
:clown: Don't Ban me.
and yet I want her more than the other 3.8 billion... It is not for my penis only, it is test to control my ego as well. That's what makes it difficult.
There are 3.8 billion women in the world. Thats more then enough for your penis to choose from, horny basturd.
No, there are not. Besides, how many of them are at a proper age? How many of them are not "taken"? I think you need to redo your math. :juggle2:
Mek Simmur al Ragaski
03-30-2008, 17:53
Damn, we need a girl in to answer this crap! Ill give a link to prole, she will know what to do!
Relationships never last forever, on the contrary, they rarely last a month (well where i live maybe less) All girls in my school are a bunch of fat sluts :sweatdrop: The boys are even worse (discluding me ofcourse, and a few other selected people who are willing to pay me to edit this post) They make the girls go out with them, snog their face off, adventure above the waist, and then dump them. I wonder if Prole is still on java chat...
Craterus
03-30-2008, 18:56
Answer what crap? I'm pretty confident in my thinking-like-a-girl skills.
RoadKill
04-01-2008, 02:37
and yet I want her more than the other 3.8 billion... It is not for my penis only, it is test to control my ego as well. That's what makes it difficult.
Well it's easy. If you truly really love her you would let her choose you, or her boyfriend. She doesn't have to be your's for you to care about her.
PS: My post before was a joke no need to get logical on me.
PS: My post before was a joke no need to get logical on me.
Oh logic does well in any situation. :whip:
Mete Han
04-01-2008, 17:15
Well it's easy. If you truly really love her you would let her choose you, or her boyfriend. She doesn't have to be your's for you to care about her.
PS: My post before was a joke no need to get logical on me.
the thing we are working on will take about a year and I have to deal with her one way or another. That is the problematic part. I cannot walk away from her just like that because she has a boyfriend, I said I would help her and she is desperate. The only redundant variable in this equation is her boyfriend. otherwise it could have been a great relationship where everyone wins and she in particular would win twice.
I'll walk the walk for her... And if it doesn't happen I got nothing to lose but she does.
RoadKill
04-02-2008, 02:30
Then there is only one thing you can do.......
Kiiillll hiiimmmmm..... dun.. dun.. dun...
But no seriously wait for her, even if it takes years. I understand what you feel when you love a girl so much but u just cant have her. But I've told myself life isn't fair, and it'll never be no matter how much anyone wants it to be.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-02-2008, 21:42
Kiiillll hiiimmmmm..... dun.. dun.. dun...
But no seriously wait for her, even if it takes years.
Waiting is boring. Go with option one. :book:
That was a joke. ~:)
Vladimir
04-03-2008, 16:33
String your bow, ride to his village and hunt him down as the Turks of old did. Aeyeyeyey! :charge:
Oh, use a camel, you'll increase your odds.
Kamakazi
04-03-2008, 16:46
This is waaay off topic but do you think it is wrong to love the daughter of a man your mother married...even if you liked/loved her before they got married and you still do? do you think that is wrong?
This is waaay off topic but do you think it is wrong to love the daughter of a man your mother married...even if you liked/loved her before they got married and you still do? do you think that is wrong?
So you mean she's now your stepsister?
No, I don't think it's wrong. A little odd, certainly, given the situation. But not wrong.
Of course, I'm in a situation that has some of the same parallels, so I'm naturally a little more sympathetic. (My dad's fiance has a daughter who's quite the looker, although fortunately I've not spent enough time around her to feel any real attraction.)
Mete Han
04-03-2008, 18:20
String your bow, ride to his village and hunt him down as the Turks of old did. Aeyeyeyey! :charge:
Oh, use a camel, you'll increase your odds.
Vlad it is not nice of to bring this camel issue up all the time. We don't have camels in Turkey and we hate to be seen as Arabs even though nowadays our regime is quite quickly moving towards Arabian regimes.
It is an effective way to insult a Turk. We percieve ourself differently than the way we are portrayed outside.
Otherwise your advise seems to make sense, I have to get rid of the boyfriend.
By the way I am really having a hard time stopping myself from giving her a call. I just don't want to create some kind of cognitive dissonance in her by pushing it too hard. I'll call her on monday but ömaybe she will call before then...
Vladimir
04-03-2008, 18:54
:laugh4: Sorry friend, no offense intended. I just remembered a story of some people in Turkey halal sacrificing a camel on an airport tarmac. I think it was posted in the Backroom somewhere.
LeftEyeNine
04-03-2008, 20:41
:laugh4: Sorry friend, no offense intended. I just remembered a story of some people in Turkey halal sacrificing a camel on an airport tarmac. I think it was posted in the Backroom somewhere.
With a religiously-in-love gov't, you can expect Winnie The Pooh getting banned from the state TV as well.
Since it had that pig in it.
Ok, Beirut, hey hey. Put that axe down now.
Mete Han
04-03-2008, 22:28
:laugh4: Sorry friend, no offense intended. I just remembered a story of some people in Turkey halal sacrificing a camel on an airport tarmac.
I hate those guys so much.... The problem is our modernisation project did not work and we have to live with them. Can you just imagine what it is like to live in such a country run by imams?...
RoadKill
04-04-2008, 00:31
I can see it now. All in the headlines of the newspaper
BOY KILLS LOVER'S BOYFRIEND WITH CAMELS AFTER TAKING ADVICE FROM FELLOW FORUM FRIENDS
I'll get my lawyer ready.
LittleGrizzly
04-04-2008, 00:41
do you think it is wrong to love the daughter of a man your mother married...even if you liked/loved her before they got married and you still do?
No but i had a friends brother who did this and they ripped into him about all the time even though there isn't anything technically wrong with it.
It can make break ups or arguments all the more complicated as kids usually mention things to thier parents, it is a very awkward situation.
I can understand completely though when i was about 14-15 my dad had a step daughter a year older than me and she was fine.
Edit: funnily enough i was watching a program on incest as i wrote that post, you can get a life sentence for being convicted of incest !! harsh..
Kamakazi
04-04-2008, 16:23
do you think it is wrong to love the daughter of a man your mother married...even if you liked/loved her before they got married and you still do?
No but i had a friends brother who did this and they ripped into him about all the time even though there isn't anything technically wrong with it.
It can make break ups or arguments all the more complicated as kids usually mention things to thier parents, it is a very awkward situation.
I can understand completely though when i was about 14-15 my dad had a step daughter a year older than me and she was fine.
Edit: funnily enough i was watching a program on incest as i wrote that post, you can get a life sentence for being convicted of incest !! harsh..
thas only with moter /father to child incest but it isnt in my case were not blood related in any way...................ive decided to wait it out and c wut happens cuz i think she feels the same or close to it but she wont admit it
Mete Han
04-04-2008, 17:46
I can see it now. All in the headlines of the newspaper
BOY KILLS LOVER'S BOYFRIEND WITH CAMELS AFTER TAKING ADVICE FROM FELLOW FORUM FRIENDS
I'll get my lawyer ready.
You should because they will link the whole thing to you for she is practically from Toronto too. Her parents still live over there. So you go get your lawyer... But we are in it together right, you, LEN and Vladimir and me?
If things dont look so bright after monday, I am going for it.
Vladimir
04-04-2008, 18:52
You should because they will link the whole thing to you for she is practically from Toronto too. Her parents still live over there. So you go get your lawyer... But we are in it together right, you, LEN and Vladimir and me?
If things dont look so bright after monday, I am going for it.
Sweet! I've never caused an international incident before. :2thumbsup:
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-05-2008, 00:14
Sweet! I've never caused an international incident before. :2thumbsup:
I do hate to brag, but if you need lessons on the subject of creating an international incident, please do stop by.
EDIT: And don't use the front door.
Mete Han
04-05-2008, 10:50
I do hate to brag, but if you need lessons on the subject of creating an international incident, please do stop by.
EDIT: And don't use the front door.
please elaborate?
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-06-2008, 00:54
please elaborate?
I'd rather not. They're probably watching me.
:uneasy:
Istanbul, by the main gate of the Topkapı Palace. Come alone. I will find you. :candle:
Vladimir
04-07-2008, 13:52
please elaborate?
Evil_Maniac From Mars
Profession by Day? Creator of dastardly schemes
Profession by Night? Thwarting evil and contradictions
:laugh4: :2thumbsup:
Mete Han
04-07-2008, 20:58
Sweet! I've never caused an international incident before. :2thumbsup:
Dude! It's go time. About half an hour ago I talked to her and she said she sat all weekend getting really bored and doing nothing and that she was so bored she went to the movies all by herself...
Take the other guy out!!! But apparently he seems to be out. I am going to ask her to eat out.
Girls never make sense...
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-07-2008, 21:53
I am going to ask her to eat out.
Wow, already? You haven't even had a date yet, have you? :inquisitive:
Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all night. :2thumbsup:
Craterus
04-07-2008, 21:56
~:2thumbsup: Go for it.
Vladimir
04-07-2008, 22:00
Dude! It's go time. Take the other guy out!!!
No worries.
:fainting:
:rifle:
master of the puppets
04-08-2008, 03:28
don't be a fool, wrap your tool.
srry, just lookin for an excuse to say that, anyway, good luck.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-08-2008, 03:38
don't be a fool, wrap your tool.
Don't be silly, wrap your willy. :laugh4:
Mete Han
04-08-2008, 17:40
Wow, already? You haven't even had a date yet, have you? :inquisitive:
Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all night. :2thumbsup:
No. and I have bad news for one thing I've discovered this morning that she is a complete retard. We have been working on this project for what, four weeks and every time we come to a conclusion she goes back and changes everything and does it all wrong again. For the last two days I keep telling her which way to go and she always brings up something stupid. She is a retard even by girl standards. And the worst thing is everything she said until now has lost its meaning because she does not have the ability to comprehend what she says might have another meaning in the context of boy girl relationships. For the last two days I have been trying to meet with her honestly to get the job done but she keeps doging me and then giving me a call and saying could you please check what I wrote out? And then she completely ignores my comments and goes back to start. We could not even get past the introduction :wall:
Tommorrow I'm gonna ask her out and make it really simple so that she cannot misunderstand. If she refuses its time to move on (unless something changes).
:sweatdrop:
what the hell is she thinking.........
Things base and vile holding no quantity,
Love transforms to form and dignity,
Love sees not with the eye but with the mind,
And therefore is the winged cupid painted blind.
Can't remember where had I read that, but what it says is, that if you really love someone, if you really think that she is the girl for you, atleast express yourself to her once. Who knows she might think the same about you........
Edit :
Oh wow, I never saw that last post, all poetry down the drain then as by what you say she might not understand it anyway eh ~D
Pardon me.
Kamakazi
04-09-2008, 16:41
Don't be silly, wrap your willy. :laugh4:
Wrap it before you tap it.
Treat it before you beat it.
LeftEyeNine
04-09-2008, 19:02
Yo, fellow, doncha know that physical beauty and mental capability are reversly related ?
That's a tragic case but, uh, you either have to get on with it or wait for a loooong time for the one who has a reasoanble amount of both.
I for one can not stand a retard no matter how much she can be the one physically.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-09-2008, 21:13
That's a tragic case but, uh, you either have to get on with it or wait for a loooong time for the one who has a reasoanble amount of both.
Once again, evil triumphs! :laugh4:
Treat it before you beat it.
~:handball:
Mete Han
04-09-2008, 21:34
Yo, fellow, doncha know that physical beauty and mental capability are reversly related ?
That's a tragic case but, uh, you either have to get on with it or wait for a loooong time for the one who has a reasoanble amount of both.
I for one can not stand a retard no matter how much she can be the one physically.
Bad news. She said she did not want to meet me when I called her cause we were supposed to meet today. And then I had to use the worst card, moaning about how things are going bad and that I needed some advice from someone and she said lets grab some coffee tommorrow evening and lets sit and talk. So the best scenario after this is that we can only be friends. And certainly she is doing this for she needs me later for the job. I am dissappionted and the worst thing is I shouldn't be. I shouldn't care. And yet I do. I need patience or else I am really going to become like Anakin Skywalker....:drama1:
so she made up her mind for now...
LeftEyeNine
04-09-2008, 21:40
That's the best situation. It will wane off quite soon. :bow:
Mete Han
04-10-2008, 02:20
That's the best situation. It will wane off quite soon. :bow:
except for the fact that I can't sleep now...:dizzy2:
LeftEyeNine
04-10-2008, 03:35
except for the fact that I can't sleep now...:dizzy2:
I didn't say "you'll avoid suffering", did I ? :bow:
Aye, if a woman is about as interesting as the mortar that holds brick walls together, you're better of alone, in the short term at least
No. and I have bad news for one thing I've discovered this morning that she is a complete retard. We have been working on this project for what, four weeks and every time we come to a conclusion she goes back and changes everything and does it all wrong again. For the last two days I keep telling her which way to go and she always brings up something stupid. She is a retard even by girl standards. And the worst thing is everything she said until now has lost its meaning because she does not have the ability to comprehend what she says might have another meaning in the context of boy girl relationships. For the last two days I have been trying to meet with her honestly to get the job done but she keeps doging me and then giving me a call and saying could you please check what I wrote out? And then she completely ignores my comments and goes back to start. We could not even get past the introduction :wall:
Tommorrow I'm gonna ask her out and make it really simple so that she cannot misunderstand. If she refuses its time to move on (unless something changes).
:sweatdrop:
what the hell is she thinking.........
Tee-hee
Never judge a book by its cover they say. What a silly saying. :sweatdrop:
Abokasee
04-11-2008, 11:12
Originally Posted by Mete Han
No. and I have bad news for one thing I've discovered this morning that she is a complete retard. We have been working on this project for what, four weeks and every time we come to a conclusion she goes back and changes everything and does it all wrong again. For the last two days I keep telling her which way to go and she always brings up something stupid. She is a retard even by girl standards. And the worst thing is everything she said until now has lost its meaning because she does not have the ability to comprehend what she says might have another meaning in the context of boy girl relationships. For the last two days I have been trying to meet with her honestly to get the job done but she keeps doging me and then giving me a call and saying could you please check what I wrote out? And then she completely ignores my comments and goes back to start. We could not even get past the introduction
Tommorrow I'm gonna ask her out and make it really simple so that she cannot misunderstand. If she refuses its time to move on (unless something changes).
what the hell is she thinking.........
Strange they learn there first word faster than boys but its all down hill from there it seems
Women/Girls
Attrative, Sane, Single
Pick 2 :grin:
Iñnsomñni
04-11-2008, 17:36
I dont think you would really like a woman with good looks and no brain, what good is she later in life??? Older women with no looks or brains, the worst combination, if you get the picture... (darn how do i send these things)(joke)
Why not just do it by yourself, if she has no brains, why do you want her to reduce your grades, pfft, id also tell her, but im harsh, my initial response to my friend getting asked out by the village bicycle (everybodys had a ride) was tell her to commit suicide, imagine that ....:skull:
But its a good idea to try and explain it to her first, tell her where she goes wrong, and if she doesnt take in the information, or refuses to (the next part of the sentence may reffur to the second possibilty) was just tell her shes dumb and needs help :furious3:
Doesnt matter too much if she doesnt like you, better looking girls usually have underproportioned private parts :embarassed:, well hope this helps (but i would advise you dont use it, just saying)
Mete Han
04-11-2008, 19:41
So we just had dinner but it was not much of a date. The firtst time I saw her I thought she was really really beautiful (if you guys wanna remmember just read the beginning of the post). The second time I saw her I thought okay she is beautiful but not that much. Now the third time I saw her I thought okay she is cute but nothing special. This is a big help.
I wanted to tell her that I felt I am being used and will not do her job if she continues to give me the cold treatment. I was going to say if she wanted me to help her that she should prove me that she is my friend and I really mean this without anything else in my mind, honestly. But I did not say it for I thought she wouldn't understand anyway...
The thing is she said let's continue to see each other this way. I said I am feeling kinda bad for I think I pushed her little bit too much trying to help her. Actually I wanted to say that I might not choose to call her but I could not say it. I wish I said that.
However I know right now that if she continues to avoid me until she needs me I will tell her where to go...:whip:
And every time I say that I might go to Adana or to England for graduate school or phd she says are you going to really go? And this time she said that I really did not have to go to England for a Masters degree and that I could instead stay here and do it online.
She kinda needs me and knows that in order to get the job done and it kinda freaks her out thinking I might go away. BUt does she really see me as a future prospect for you know.... I wish I could read minds.
Maybe it's time this thread ended, I dont know what should I do...
Dear Guild Members Advice Please
Craterus
04-11-2008, 21:32
Why do you think she's using you just for the job?
If you're meeting up for non-work related things, I think that's a good sign.
Mete Han
04-12-2008, 06:29
Why do you think she's using you just for the job?
If you're meeting up for non-work related things, I think that's a good sign.
maybe because she knows unless she maintains some kinda relationship my motivation to help her will decrease significantly?
whatever I got a job interview in 3 hours, I have to consantrate.
patience young jedi:knight:
Iñnsomñni
04-12-2008, 12:33
Nothing feels worse than failing, nothing feels better than to watch others fail, but thats me, im cruel, id leave her to her dumbness, being used, pfftt id have left ages ago...
maybe because she knows unless she maintains some kinda relationship my motivation to help her will decrease significantly?
I think you may have already answered your own question there, mate.
It now seems pretty clear that she's simply taking you for a ride, and will cheerfully manipulate you to the best of her abilities so that you'll continue to assist her with her work. Don't fall into her trap, man. :no:
Centurio Nixalsverdrus
04-12-2008, 23:57
maybe because she knows unless she maintains some kinda relationship my motivation to help her will decrease significantly?
Hmm, I really feel for you...
To confirm it, you could do the following: Get (a bit) angry and turn your back on her. Tell her what you're thinking she is doing. That would lead to some possible reactions:
1) She will start crying, confessing her feelings toward you. That'd be very positive but not very realistic.
2) She will eagerly deny your suspicion and carry on. That would be the final evidence for your theory that she uses you for work.
3) She will get angry and hurt about your suspicions. This way at least you will have the (relative) certainty that she was not using you. Now you can confess yourself if you like or do whatever you want.
Mete Han
04-13-2008, 12:50
Hmm, I really feel for you...
To confirm it, you could do the following: Get (a bit) angry and turn your back on her. Tell her what you're thinking she is doing. That would lead to some possible reactions:
do u think that's a good idea cause I've been thinking to do the same thing, being honest with a girl who probably is dishonest.
Another question is should I wait for her to call me back or should I be the first to call? I think I should wait for her to call and if she does not call until she needs something then that means she is using me. If she calls for talking or doing something then it still might mean she is using me with a plan or maybe she is indeed interested in me.
maybe it is time to abandon ship.
Being used is the sweetest way to die, if she's using you why not make the best out of it and walk out like a winner, game, set, match. Seems like the affection is kinda gone, when your gutt tells you something listen we are social creatures.
Man, that really sounds like she's using you, best to jump ship before there's nothing left to float on.
Being used is the sweetest way to die, if she's using you why not make the best out of it and walk out like a winner, game, set, match.
Ah, I see where you going with this. :smoking:
pevergreen
04-13-2008, 16:13
Alright. I see multiple ways out of this, but then again, I am a sleazy /b/tard.
Step 1. Continue to pretend to be used
Step 2. Turn it all back on her in public, embarrasing her so much she never tries to work with you again
Step 3. ???
Step 4. Profit
Thats if you want to turn it back on her, if you actually want to have a relationship with her, then either stop her using you, to establish equal footing, or continue being used, but slowly stop it, so she thinks she still has control and maybe she might eventually love you.
That is all in the frame of mind that she doesnt like you, if she does, potential score?
Mete Han
04-13-2008, 17:57
Alright. I see multiple ways out of this, but then again, I am a sleazy /b/tard.
Step 1. Continue to pretend to be used
Step 2. Turn it all back on her in public, embarrasing her so much she never tries to work with you again
Step 3. ???
Step 4. Profit
Thats if you want to turn it back on her, if you actually want to have a relationship with her, then either stop her using you, to establish equal footing, or continue being used, but slowly stop it, so she thinks she still has control and maybe she might eventually love you.
That is all in the frame of mind that she doesnt like you, if she does, potential score?
I think she kinda likes me (as a future opportunity, maybe) but the problem is she has a boyfriend. She may not be able cope with dating another guy and feel like a slut. So I have to make her choose me over her boyfriend in her sub-conscious mind. But I don't have the chance to see her like everyday. And if I call her she will run away. If I wait for her to call there will be too much time in between and I will not have the impact I need in her sub-conscious mind.
pity she was sweet
pevergreen
04-13-2008, 18:12
Alright, I take it that you want to go after her?
There is no problem man, I did this exact thing with my girlfriend, and we've been going out for nigh half a year now.
Keep in contact any way you can, I had to use MSN. I saw her once, for 20 minutes before I started going out with her (the next time we met up, I posted in another thread about it...i might go read it again, was funny)
Organise the meetings around the work, over time, just prove to her that she doesnt really get anything from her current boyfriend, that someone else (you) offers a lot better things for her. You already care about her etc. I had some help, she only saw him once a week. Find the critical weakness in the relationship and exploit it. Bring him into shame any way you can.
Mete Han
04-13-2008, 18:27
Alright, I take it that you want to go after her?
There is no problem man, I did this exact thing with my girlfriend, and we've been going out for nigh half a year now.
Keep in contact any way you can, I had to use MSN. I saw her once, for 20 minutes before I started going out with her (the next time we met up, I posted in another thread about it...i might go read it again, was funny)
Organise the meetings around the work, over time, just prove to her that she doesnt really get anything from her current boyfriend, that someone else (you) offers a lot better things for her. You already care about her etc. I had some help, she only saw him once a week. Find the critical weakness in the relationship and exploit it. Bring him into shame any way you can.
the thing is the first part of her project is over and the next due time is in september and there is no way I can see her for work now... But I don't know what to do. She really needs me for the rest of it but if I don't see her for that long I will stop liking her and I really thought it would be great going out with her. and the worst thing is even if I do go out with another girl when she calls I will start wanting her again unless of course I really like the other girl.
So she has the strings because she knows I like her...
But if did not tell her I liked her then maybe she wouldn't be interested in meeting me outside of the work thing.
pevergreen
04-13-2008, 18:32
At this point does she know you like her? Those last two lines confused me a bit.
Take her out as a friend, in groups if you have to. The problem with advice from the .org is the culture barrier. Something acceptle in Australia, would not be in Sweden etc.
I suggest talking it over with a close friend, if nothing else, you share the load.
Mete Han
04-13-2008, 18:39
At this point does she know you like her? Those last two lines confused me a bit.
Take her out as a friend, in groups if you have to. The problem with advice from the .org is the culture barrier. Something acceptle in Australia, would not be in Sweden etc.
I suggest talking it over with a close friend, if nothing else, you share the load.
I told her she has a very lucky boy friend the second time we met when she came over to my place to work. But I told her while taking her back to her home for she was in big stress at my place. After that she started to avoid me until we met on friday.
My friends have contradicting opinions naturally.
I must be patient I guess....
pevergreen
04-13-2008, 18:53
Do you know the boyfriend personally?
If you do, back off.
But if you dont, either go for her, or wait it out, your choice. Waiting it out will probably cause you to stop liking her enough to think about it, but if you really like her now, give it a while, even before you start with anyone else.
Just my advice. :bow:
Im off to bed now, 4am and all.
Mete Han
04-13-2008, 19:51
Do you know the boyfriend personally?
If you do, back off.
But if you dont, either go for her, or wait it out, your choice. Waiting it out will probably cause you to stop liking her enough to think about it, but if you really like her now, give it a while, even before you start with anyone else.
Just my advice. :bow:
Im off to bed now, 4am and all.
no i dont know him...
i should give it a while unless she makes a move.
Evil_Maniac From Mars
04-13-2008, 23:51
If she has a boyfriend and she's seeing you like that, I don't know about how you do things in Turkey, but here, that would be practically cheating - some other male seeing my girlfriend like that. Does her boyfriend know?
I really don't think she's worth your time. :shrug:
Mete Han
04-22-2008, 20:19
I know someday you'll have a beautiful life,
I know you'll be a sun in somebody else's sky, but why
Why, why can't it be, why can't it be mine
I guess that's it... she is running away too badly and I can't seem to have the power to run after her. I guess I am too sensitive for such a selfish girl.
LeftEyeNine
04-22-2008, 22:59
Well I guess it's a tradition in Turkey that breakups/failures need to be crowned with that famous part of Pearl Jam's Black. I had got the same thing.
Quick recovery, mate.
Mete Han
04-25-2008, 20:19
Well I guess it's a tradition in Turkey that breakups/failures need to be crowned with that famous part of Pearl Jam's Black. I had got the same thing.
Quick recovery, mate.
but it's a great song...
what the hell I will make her be the sun in my sky I just have to be more patient... I guess...
vBulletin® v3.7.1, Copyright ©2000-2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.