Damn you, real life [Archive]

Mikeus Caesar

06-04-2008, 10:06

InsaneApache

06-04-2008, 10:20

I know that you're only a whippersnapper but try this...

https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=103440

:laugh4:

Mikeus Caesar

06-04-2008, 10:28

I know that you're only a whippersnapper but try this...

https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=103440

:laugh4:

Ah, there is a crucial difference, oh elder wise one - your thread involves moaning about things in general life that annoy and aggravate. This is about our own lives, and thus has the potential to go beyond farce and potentially reach a philosophical point of view. Or something.

InsaneApache

06-04-2008, 10:31

Well to be honest, I'd be cheesed off if I'd had to leave Yorkshire (Britains Texas apparently) and go to live in Oz. :laugh4:

HoreTore

06-04-2008, 10:53

I'm actually in a good mood now :2thumbsup:

Which is an achievement, after I've spent a month in depression after the love of my life dumped me... But now that's sorted out, I've come to accept that we should just stay friends, and I'm happy with it too. In fact, I no longer see her as the love of my life, but as my best friend.

So, that's one down, now I just have to find a new place to live and a new job... If anyone here has real estate or owns a company in Norway, be sure to let me know :smash:

PBI

06-04-2008, 11:49

I feel your pain, Mikeus Caesar, working nightshifts is definitely right up there on the list of crappy jobs. I used to work nightshifts in a vegetarian sausage factory and I found it so depressing I quit after a month. I think the worst part was probably having to set off for work as the sun was setting and everyone else was getting ready for bed. It's really not worth it for minimum wage. Plus, as you say, you are pretty much exhausted all the time.

Just to help you sink even further into your manic-depressive fugue, did you know working nightshifts actually kills you? Apparently it shaves something like ten years off your life expectancy.

I also used to hate the fact that if I finished my night's work early, instead of being allowed to go home I would be told to "look busy" until the day staff arrived. Not exactly a great incentive to work hard, I hate having to make it look like I'm working a great deal more than I hate working itself.

That's one of the reasons I'm going into research, because nobody gives a damn how busy you look or even whether you show up for work or not so long as you have some decent results at the end of the year. Of course, it's a double edged sword, I have plenty of experience of working flat-out for a month and having nothing to show for it. But at least I don't go home at the end of the day smelling of rotting tofu.

Wasp

06-04-2008, 12:03

The answer: Philosophy!

pevergreen

06-04-2008, 12:09

i know why you feel like that, you are living in adelaide...

Move up to Brisbane, me and sapi can cheer you up!

Mikeus Caesar

06-04-2008, 12:46

i know why you feel like that, you are living in adelaide...

Move up to Brisbane, me and sapi can cheer you up!

I really do wish i could move to some other city where thing's are happening, but alas, one of the conditions of my residency visa is that i live in South Australia. Until i apply for citizenship and get it, i'm stuck in this one horse town.

LittleGrizzly

06-04-2008, 13:08

I used to work a night shift in a rotating shift pattern 0600-1400 1400-2200 and 2200-0600, the night shift was actually my favourite shift, it fits my sleeping patterns perfectly, after work i would have a little smoke with my friend till about 0800 then sleep till mid to late afternoon, go out for a little bit after im awake and then back home to get ready for work, also on a night shift we wouldn't have the big bosses in who worked 9-5, so work was more relaxed as well as fitting my sleeping pattern perfectly.

on the other hand the 0600-1400 shift was an absolute killer for me, i would be knackered throughout the week and usually at about wednesday or thursday i would end up going to sleep at about 1700 and not wake up until a few hours before work, im not sure if the life expectancy is lower for night shift workers because it doesn't fit into thier sleep pattern or if its just because its generally unnatural, i swear down though if two of me went back there and stayed on a shift permanantly (one on morning one on nights) the mornings me im sure would be dead alot sooner.

My parents keep telling me to move out. I can't find a better paying job that would allow me to have the financial resources to do so.

I feel your pain with this one, parents or mine at least and im assuming yours can't seem to comprehend just how difficult the housing market is for first timers, even moving out just to rent a place would leave you flat broke after rent bills and food, and what kind of life is that just paying to house and feed yourself

LIFE SUCKS!

But im actually in quite a good mood, had an exam today that was ridicously easy, took my time and i finished the 2 hour exam in 50mins, pretty sure i had every question right. The sun is shining and i only have one exam left tommorow and then im off for 3 odd months!

Im probably returning to the place i was on about earlier during that time but for the moment i shall pertend i have a long lazy summer ahead!

Odin

06-04-2008, 14:09

ITT: We rant, even though few people will bother reading it, about what sucks in our life right now. And who knows, maybe offer constructive criticism to each other and have everyone come out if it as better people. Or optionally the topic sinks to the bottom with 4 replies like all backroom threads do, at least the ones that aren't arguments about religion or who's culture has the bigger penis. Anyway, moving on...

The real world sucks. Having only been exposed to it for a while, i can safely say i am right. In the 3 months that i've been working, i've been reduced to a neurotic, shaky wreck from doing night shifts and not having a real sleeping schedule and drinking nothing but coffee and whisky. I have one friend in the world and she isn't available for the rest of the week. She's busy with uni work for the next few days and then is going away for the weekend with her family. My feet are cold. I have a runny nose. The neighbours don't like me. My job is tiring. Wait, moaned about that already. My parents keep telling me to move out. I can't find a better paying job that would allow me to have the financial resources to do so. The music i play isn't anywhere near depressing as i'd like it to be. The weather isn't what i would like it to be, it's just the same slightly over-cast sunny weather. I'm bored and fed up of the same things happening all the time. I'm fed up of only visiting the same websites. I'm fed up of every workshift being the same. I'm fed up of the TV being so mindless and dull.

It's really times like this that i'd just like to scream at my family to bugger off, and then get some stuff together, put on my coat and leave. I don't know where. Go camp in a forest for a few months, despite there being no forests within 100 miles of here. Just desert. So alternately i'd just want to leave and not return. Go somewhere that i can forget all of this. Forget my job, my pile of debts, my cold feet. Go somewhere i can be happy, do as i please and not have to worry about how i get to my midnight shift on a Sunday.

Give me $10000, a car and some clean clothes and i could go. Far off to a bigger city like Melbourne, or Sydney. Places where i can do something. Places where i can live happily far away from my damn family, away from my crap job, away from normal. Just run away.

Anyway, enough about me. Time for a few more people to moan, or comment on my moaning, and then it's straight to page 2.

What I have to offer is an alternative path to you're tale of woe. Now what I am about to say requires that you believe my personal reflections, I cant control that so if your not up for it dont bother to read on.

I am a materially successful person who has a decent amount of personal relationships that have evolved into good friends. The manner in which I obtained this was being an angry, cynical, never satisfied and unpleasant person. Effectively i have been able to turn situations that you describe as the catlyst for moaning into the outcome of prosperity.

It will require you to accept a couple of very important tenets:

1. You cant worry about things you cant control: This tenet is specifically designed to eliminate the burden of worrying about what other people think. This enables you to formulate your own ethical, moral code, which inturn allows you to assign the valuations for your own success (and failure).

2. There is only 1 thing you have 100% control over and that is yourself: Piggy backing off of tenet 1, this allows the individual to take responsibility for their own actions. This sets up the internal scenario for responsiblity of one's self. The question becomes, during the 3 months of hell you were working did you aprehend the person who had the gun to you're head and forced you into the circumstance?

3. Just because you believe something to be right, dosent mean it is: This is the most important concept because it requires humility (something you will not find here at the org often). If you can accept that your system of thoughts and beliefs are not necessarily universal truths this will go a long way to temper your abrasiveness toward others and enable you to have relationships based on mutual respect, formulated through concessions and acceptance of others.

4. Just because someone believes your wrong, dosent mean you are: This speaks to the value of your expirence. Time allows reflection of past events, that reflection tempered with the current circumstance and potential future action is the foundation and formulation of wisdom. If those 3 elements have occurred rest on your laurels and refer to tenet 1.

These are glimpses of thought processes that can take you on a new path. One could reexamine you're situation and proclaim that the 3 months of work were the best thing that have ever happened to you, because now you know what you will be avoiding in the future.

Employment of this thought process, sadly runs counter to popular sociological trends. Individualism is not a welcomed course today, however a large portion of successful people are often the ones who chose not to conform to popular rationals and persued their own approaches to life.

In 10 years will you still be complaining about the choices you have made, or will you be offerring some young soul a tree branch to prevent them from being pulled down by the quick sand of life and human interactions?

Becoming an angry, self absorbed driven person has perils. You will find most people dont want to deal with you, they will whisper about you even attempt to coral your internal instincts into conformity. This will breed two outcomes, you will conform and be unhappy, or you will disregard sociological pressures and continue on a path you largely define. Each has its own plus's and minus's but the later affords one the solace of knowing that the accepted full responsibility for their life, and thus reap the full reward.

Good luck.

Sigurd

06-04-2008, 14:33

You guys should just lighten up a bit. You are all: there is no end to sorrow, no end to strife.
Lift your heads and don’t just focus on where your feet are right now. There must be goals in your life or plans, things to look forward to, hopes or prospects. Don’t be so gloomy.

Hey, I have had my share of bad jobs and depressing times. In the navy I had a few night shifts in an area where the sun never got above the horizon. It was dark when you got up and it was dark when you went to bed. No worries M8, in 6 months you knew that it would be reversed and the sun never went below the horizon. When I ended my service I moved home and contemplated studying, while contemplating I worked in the postal service and lived at home. Luckily I had good relations with my parents. It’s all how you pat the hairs on a cat so to speak. If you are a good tenant: no problems. Then I finally decided on a course in life and started studying. Well I lived at home a little while and paid a few bucks to my mum for it.
If you earn money, you pay. Don’t be a leech.
Being a student you can apply for student apartments and I did and got one. Slightly more expensive than living with your parents, but you don’t have to call saying you’ll be home late and tell them to go to bed and not worry. Besides you don’t have to worry about your girl finding your father on the toilet one morning.
Thin walls in the student home get you worked up and with a beautiful woman next to you, one thing leads to another even marriage. A baby is conceived and you need to move out of the student home and rent a more expensive apartment. Your woman works at a big company and provides for you, because your weekend job can’t buy more than half the food budget.
You get a student loan and take your wife and daughter to Australia to finish your studies there. Luckily everything costs half of what you are used to and you can afford a better apartment in the city. Another baby is conceived before you finish and you send your pregnant wife home with your 2 year old daughter to live with her parents until you get back. The baby is born 2 months after your post graduation and you get a crappy job with a fixed pay no matter how much hours you put in. But all considered real life is not too bad.
You still rent an apartment because you can’t afford buying anything. Then, finally after 3 years you quit, saying thank you for putting some experience on my back. You are now a valued prospect for the bigger companies. You finally get the job you wanted all along and get the pay to match it. You skip all the buying of small apartments, work you way year after year getting bigger and better apartments, and go for the big one: Building your own home. You have two daughters and a wife that can finally start on her career. This time it is you who provides. Wifey have two more years in her 5 year study and you are saving a few bucks to get that motorcycle you always wanted. In 3 years you plan to go back to Australia and do all the things you had neither time nor money to do the last time you were there.
I am not going into finding out you have cancer, but you need to realize that we can change status quo and progress. It only takes a plan and the will to do something about it.

Mikeus Caesar

06-04-2008, 14:49

It only takes a plan and the will to do something about it.

Despite my whining and such, i do have some plans. They also involve large timescales like yours and i look forward to it, i strive for it. I guess things wouldn't seem so glum at this moment though if i had a bit more cash to splash around. Go out and meet people, or just go out and sit somewhere nice drinking coffee. Not sitting here in my damn house quietly cursing everytime i hear my mother go on another of her rants about how she hates this place.

Obviously the only way to do this is with a better job, and surprisingly enough it's proving very difficult to find a better job. Useless city, how dare it be devoid of jobs for unqualified 17 year olds.

LittleGrizzly

06-04-2008, 14:59

Useless city, how dare it be devoid of jobs for unqualified 17 year olds.

heh, been there too, a few years and various crappy jobs and unemployment later i find myself on an Access course to get into university, education really is the way to go, few people seem to find nice jobs that pay decently without starting with some qaulifications (that seems to be more the case as time goes on as well)

so what are your plans ? education or work your way up in the world of work ?

KukriKhan

06-04-2008, 15:04

Wise words from Odin and Sigurd; maybe you're probably looking for info more specific to your situation.

As you describe your situation: you are a young, under-skilled, under-schooled, willing to work, legal immigrant in a foreign (but friendly) country. Wishful thinking about $10K and a car is fun, but not productive. You need a marketable skill-set. So get one (assuming you don't have a native talent like concert pianist, or an intuitive understanding of physics).

How to get one? School, or apprenticeship, or the military. When you boil down your options, those are really your three choices. Find someone to finance your schooling, or find someone to take you on as a trade apprentice, or join the military and let them train you in a skill that you can sell after your honourable discharge.

Sorry to be so blunt, but I think that's what you're asking for: a way out of the vicious cycle you see yourself in.

Mikeus Caesar

06-04-2008, 15:04

naut

06-05-2008, 14:21

Best way to get experience, while your still living with your parents that is, find semi-decent businesses (nothing too flash), get interviews and tell them your passionate and committed and will do a month or so work with no pay just to get the experience. It does work (with a bit of luck), I've done it before.

HoreTore

06-05-2008, 14:49

Also, companies in the start-up phase are good places to seek work.

The owner might be looking for inexperienced people instead of experienced ones, since the former are cheaper, and money is usually pretty tight the first year.

Reverend Joe

06-05-2008, 18:22

A few, much simpler words of advice:

Stop listening to depressing music. Listen to music made by people who were depressed and wanted to let it out and feel better; for example, old Delta/Chicago blues, or Otis Redding and the like.

Stop drinking whisky. Limit yourself to a beer or two a night (day?) during the week, and a six-pack or more when you don't have to go to work tomorrow night.

Start exercising in your spare time. It can be simple as going for a 2-3 hour walk, or doing as many pushups as you can. It will work out frustration, and release endorphins in its place.

Push yourself. Try your damnedest to find a social atmosphere to hang out in to avoid isolation.

Finally, see if you can't get a dual citizenship to allow you to access the rest of the country.

Oh, right -- I don't exactly agree with what Odin said; becoming highly individualistic is not at all synonymous with being cynical and self-centered. So, try just doing things your way, and see how it turns out. Maybe you will become narcissistic and cynical; maybe not. You may actually become a very cheerful, enjoyable person when you stop caring what other people think about you.

Odin

06-05-2008, 18:30

Oh, right -- I don't exactly agree with what Odin said; becoming highly individualistic is not at all synonymous with being cynical and self-centered. So, try just doing things your way, and see how it turns out. Maybe you will become narcissistic and cynical; maybe not. You may actually become a very cheerful, enjoyable person when you stop caring what other people think about you.

Yes Joe your correct. I think I put this cavaet in my post but if I didnt I appologize.

What worked for me might not work for someone else. He is a young man and will undoubtly come in contact with ruthless, unforgiving, cunning, unyeilding people like me in his business expirence. There are many means to an end, and there are many ways in which to conduct oneself, there is no absolute perfect method and one must be able to adjust based on circumstances.

Reverend Joe

06-05-2008, 20:18

He is a young man and will undoubtly come in contact with ruthless, unforgiving, cunning, unyeilding people like me

:stunned: That's a very honest self-assessment.

Odin

06-05-2008, 20:23

:stunned: That's a very honest self-assessment.

I would be unable to conduct myself the way I do if I didnt have the ability to be honest about the type of person I am. Humility for all its romantic connetations, is a vital charecteristic for those who are demanding of themselves and others.

Divinus Arma

06-05-2008, 20:38

To provide some hope.

Real life is amazing. I'll cover some generalities, and then I'll be specific about my own:

General Awesomeness, in no particular order:

Love
Friendship
Sex
Beer
The Ocean
Trees
Balloons
Jets
American Football
Sports in general
The smell of freshly cut grass
The naked female body
Food, in all its variety
Shelter
Warmth
Fire
Marshmellows
The sense of touch
High quality vodka
The feeling when you achieve a challenging goal
The sense of sight
Mozart
Rock and Roll
The sound of a creek
Butterflies
Outerspace
Sharks
Color
Thought
Books
Conversation
Speculation
Imagination
A comfortable chair
Lemonade on a hot day
pools, spas
Billiards
Fine leather
Computers
THE TOTAL WAR SERIES!
The first day you see your very own child
The day your child crawls, walks, smiles, says "da-da", uses a spoon, etc infinitum
The sparkle in your woman's eye when she truly loves you at that moment
Marble flooring
Sleep
A comfortable bed
clouds
rain
the warm sun
cats
dogs
animals in general
ants and their miniature kingdoms
Trains
Legos
Art
Great movies
travel
History
James Bond
grandparents
electricity
Helicopters
Fire fighting!
National identity

...and the possibilities of human acheivement...

Personal: Why my life as a responsible adult in a free society is joyous.

I have a home, a wife who loves me, two beautiful healthy kids, a great job, and total freedom to direct my life. On any given day, I have total control over my future. This is because I live in a country of limitless opportunity for those with imagination enough to see the opportunity, the courage to act on it, and the commitment to follow it through.

Our fathers and grandfathers have died to give us this birthright. I am ashamed of my spoiled and weak generation that asks for everything and returns nothing. I am ashamed of my generation which demands instant gratification and has no patience for earned rewards. I am ashamed of my generation that only seeks to be served instead of serve. They seek to be lifted up, instead of lifting up others. They are lazy, selfish, and ungrateful.

If you hate life and you look in the mirror with disgust everyday, it is your own fault. Have the courage to act and control your life.

We are blessed with limitless opportunity to utilize our talent and craft our own destiny!

Have a nice day.

Husar

06-05-2008, 22:20

Nice list Da, but he lives in Australia now, doesn't have full citizenship, is restricted in where he can go and what he can do and the founders of the country he lives in weren't heroic freedom fighters but a bunch of british criminals. ~;)

InsaneApache

06-05-2008, 22:27

Disapointed in life? Get a hobby. Become a nihilist.

Gaius Scribonius Curio

06-06-2008, 02:20

The real world sucks. Having only been exposed to it for a while, i can safely say i am right. In the 3 months that i've been working, i've been reduced to a neurotic, shaky wreck from doing night shifts and not having a real sleeping schedule and drinking nothing but coffee and whisky. I have one friend in the world and she isn't available for the rest of the week. She's busy with uni work for the next few days and then is going away for the weekend with her family. My feet are cold. I have a runny nose. The neighbours don't like me. My job is tiring. Wait, moaned about that already. My parents keep telling me to move out. I can't find a better paying job that would allow me to have the financial resources to do so. The music i play isn't anywhere near depressing as i'd like it to be. The weather isn't what i would like it to be, it's just the same slightly over-cast sunny weather. I'm bored and fed up of the same things happening all the time. I'm fed up of only visiting the same websites. I'm fed up of every workshift being the same. I'm fed up of the TV being so mindless and dull.

Mikeus, if you think the real world sucks, then it will. I could scream because I just had a massive reply typed out and my laptop died, so this is mk2.

-Night shifts are not the only times that a young unskilled person can work. I (a young, as yet unskilled, person), work in retail part-time while I study at uni. Yes its boring, repetitive and unstimulating, but its money and it doesn't wreck my sleep schedule.
-Lay off the whisky, drink in moderation. Sounds boring, but it worked for me. Not to long ago I was (and this hasn't been confirmed by a professional, but 95% of the people I know agreed) depressed. Now I still might be, but not as badly and part of that is due to me drinking a lot less (it began because I play sport, but I've realised the sense behind it).
-If you've finished school and can get in, go to TAFE. If you haven't finished school you're parents shouldn't be complaining. If you can't get into TAFE, try and get an apprenticeship. Long-term I know but eventually you should be able to get a decent job, but make sure you pick something that you enjoy.
-Adelaide isn't the worst place in the world, you could be in Tasmania! (no offence to the Tasmanians).
-Do some exercise as well. Over the past couple of months, playing football and squash and more football, has kept me sane.

Some advice from someone your own age, whose emigrated from England, and was as depressed as you are (maybe go see a doctor about that as well).

Curio

Samurai Waki

06-06-2008, 10:08

The better you've had it (financially, and legally speaking of course) The worse people seem to be. I'll tell you this, be damned thankful that at least you've got a house over your head, two feet to walk on, and food in the refrigerator. I've found myself complaining about EVERYTHING!!!! Yet, looking back on all of it, I've had it better than 90% of the rest of the US, and this is the United States, not the world we're talking. I mean I can victimize myself because of bi-polar, or for lack of a better word abandonment issues, but when it all comes down to it, I'm just a huge wuss compared to the lot of most mankind. Now that I have two daughters, and a wife who loves me, life hasn't been about poor ol' me, but them and why I should thank god everyday for what I have compared to what I don't have, and what I don't have seems to pale in comparison. Its unfortunate to hear about your situation, but honestly you need to get out more, enjoy the little things (like what Divinus posted) and just be thankful you're not herding sheep. Easier said than done, I know, but there have been times I've had the compelling thought to drop all my things, including my money and any sort of Identification and just have a stab at life the way its supposed to be, one step at a time, and building your way from the ground up. But since I do have a family that I love and cherish more than my own life, I'm going to stick with that, and learn a thing or two on the way the to the end.

naut

06-06-2008, 13:19

I can relate in some aspects. I emigrated from the UK here also. But it has been 8 years since then. School helped on all fronts, socially, physically and mentally. So that'd be my first piece of advice, as Curio said, look at TAFE courses, there are one's for everyone (almost).

Ok problem one:
In the 3 months that i've been working, i've been reduced to a neurotic, shaky wreck from doing night shifts and not having a real sleeping schedule
I can only say the obvious, if it's have such a negative effect on you, you'll have to find a more agreeable job.

Two:
drinking nothing but coffee and whisky.
Ok, coffee is a diuretic and whisky, well alcohol, require nutrients and water to process. Dehydration has alot of negative effects, which seem to be affecting your physical state. (Also save money from not buying whiskey.)

Three:
I have one friend in the world and she isn't available for the rest of the week. She's busy with uni work for the next few days and then is going away for the weekend with her family.
You'll have to find somewhere, anywhere to socialise, be it at TAFE, sport, whatever.

Four:
My feet are cold. I have a runny nose.
Sounds like a cumulation of your lack of sleep and state of stress.

Five:
The neighbours don't like me.
Stuff 'em, your not living to impress them, your living for yourself.

Six:
My parents keep telling me to move out. I can't find a better paying job that would allow me to have the financial resources to do so.
Sit them down and talk to them, if your in a rut they should understand they're your parents after all. Parents often just want to be involved in their kids lives and nagging is one way they do that. Instead try and get them involved, ask them to keep an eye out in the newspaper, etc, for jobs and opportunities, anything to help.

Seven:
The music i play isn't anywhere near depressing as i'd like it to be.
I dunno what you listen to, but if I'm sad/angry At the Drive In kicks arse.

Eight:
The weather isn't what i would like it to be, it's just the same slightly over-cast sunny weather.
At least your not stuck in the UK! The weather could be a lot worse.

Nine:
I'm bored and fed up of the same things happening all the time. I'm fed up of only visiting the same websites. I'm fed up of every workshift being the same. I'm fed up of the TV being so mindless and dull.
Hey, no one is forcing you to do those things, you want different things to happen, well they're not going to appear out of nowhere. As hard as it is you have to get yourself out there on your prerogative to get things to happen.

Good Luck. :bow:

Adrian II

06-09-2008, 18:35

The real world sucks.Welcome to the club. Have a drink and get over it.

Anything else?

Ice

06-11-2008, 06:10

Welcome to the club. Have a drink and get over it.

Anything else?

harsh, to the point, and true