Monk
09-19-2008, 12:48
This was born out of seeing a lot of "Hey what sorta player are you" threads that frequent this forum, so I got together with one Askthepizzaguy and formulated this small quiz. Really, it's just for fun and will tell you exactly WHAT sort of player you are, as well as give you a short - entertaining snippet based upon that style you choose.
SCORING
The way this test works is there are four categories. Each letter is related to a category. One answer in a certain category nets you one point toward that overall strategy.
Get enough points in a category and you’ll get certain “rewards” at the end of the quiz showing you what strategy you lean toward. There are a total of 15 points to be spread among the categories and 3 “levels” that particular strategy sees itself employed in your Total War ventures.
The levels work as followed.
Dedicated: 13+ points in one category means you are a dedicated user of this strategy. Nothing else really matters to you.
Major: 8-12 points in one category means you are a major user of this tactic. Its something you use a lot, but you know how to do other things.
Minor: 4-7 in one category denotes you one minor mastery of that tactic. This likely isn't your main tactic.
0-3 points in a category means that strategy really isn’t your thing, and it’s not something you would generally do given a situation.
If you by chance score three catagories at 5 each, then you are automatically granted the "Dedicated" reward of the D catagory!
If by chance you score something akin to a 4/4/4/3, then you are automatically granted the "Dedicated" reward of the D category
Mark down your answers and tally your score, scroll down to the bottom to see what kind of player you are!
1. You’ve just hit the campaign map, what’s the first thing you do before anything else?
a. Go bankrupt spamming troops and attack the AI!
b. Start building an infrastructure. I need money to conquer!
c. Make alliances. I’ll need friends if I’m to expand!
d. Build troops and develop an economy.
2. Things are not looking well, your faction starts with few provinces and your income is falling fast, what’s your move to get rid of the debt?
a. Raise taxes to maximum and sack as many provinces as possible while leaving no troops behind to defend.
b. Disband the more expensive units in my army and focus on building up.
c. Seek alliances and hope to secure tribute, maybe sell some lands I don’t need.
d. Sack a few provinces but still hold back for defense, I can’t leave myself vulnerable.
3. Your faction is recovering from its terrible start but one of your neighbors seems to be getting powerful. Your strength seems equal for now but if left unchecked they may prove a problem. What shall you do?
a. Attack and pillage their greatest castle, leave their capital in ruins to make sure their economy will be crippled for years to come.
b. I continue to build my strength and tech up so I have the advantage.
c. Seek to ally with them, apart we are weak but together we are strong.
d. Nothing. We are equal now, we will be equal later.
4. The Pope has called for you to stop the bloodshed of your fellow Christians; however you were not the aggressor in the war!
a. I continue the war and wipe out my enemy for daring to attack me. If the Pope continues his pestering, he’ll be next!
b. Victory means nothing if my empire is excommunicated. I pull back my forces and wait out the grace period.
c. The will of God is a fickle thing, I build reputation with the pope through gifts and if that fails the assassin’s blade shall find its way to the holy father’s throat.
d. I take stock of the situation and take whatever action shall benefit me more. If that means excommunication then so be it!
5. A crusade/Jihad has been called, despite whatever is going on at your home provinces it is expected of you to join. What is your choice?
a. I called the Jihad/Crusade myself, and my entire standing army has joined it.
b. I answer the call but only with limited troops, I still must think of my home provinces.
c. I use the chance of the crusade to build relations with the Pope. Once my troops have done the work, I shall gift the captured settlement to the Papacy.
d. A crusade? Sounds like the perfect chance to build a crusader empire to me.
6. Enemy agents are wreaking havoc in your lands, it’s taken you some time but you’ve cornered one on the map and figured out what empire they are originating from. What is your response?
a. Once I eliminate their home faction, the agents will be gone.
b. Place spies in every settlement for defensive purposes.
c. Use assassins to silence them for good.
d. Both B and C.
7. Your greatest thrill when playing Total War is…
a. Slaying the Pope. I am your God now.
b. Building a mighty kingdom whose tech is a marvel.
c. Watching the factions dance as I pull the strings, not even the Pope is immune to my diplomats!
d. One thing? I GOTTA PICK ONE THING!? AAAARRGH *brain explodes*
8. Do you try to get generals with high Dread or high Chivalry?
a. What’s Chivalry?
b. Chivalry. They make much better governors.
c. Chivalry. Exterminating prisoners only hurts my relations!
d. Both, they have their uses.
9. What is the state of your Empire by turn 30?
a. Bored because there’s no one left to kill.
b. My tech and troop quality is amazing, if I wanted I could conquer the world.
c. My reputation with nearly every faction is amazing. I could declare war upon the pope’s own mother and the Holy Father would side with me!
d. My kingdom is formidable yes, but there’s still much to overcome.
10. What is your strategy for dealing with enemy armies in the field?
a. Using low quality troops and mercenaries I kill the enemy general and route his forces at all costs, caring little for casualties.
b. Using the only the best troops I form up in a line and fight them man for man, I try to flank and wear him down but try not to incur too many casualties.
c. Assassinate their general and bribe them. Enemy army? Oh, you mean my loyal troops.
d. I use ambushes, bridges, and forts to force the enemy to fight the battle I want.
11. You’ve run up against a tough enemy garrison, it looks as if the enemy’s got some heavy hitters inside. How do you deal with it?
a. Use mostly cavalry with a high dread gen, who are vastly outnumbered by the garrison, route the enemy force quickly when they sally.
b. I settle in for a siege, I’m in no rush.
c. Wreak havoc with agents by destroying public buildings and try to force a rebellion with spies.
d. Spy opens the gate and our armies rush the center to hold it for 3 min while sustaining as few casualties as possible.
12. The Golden Horde has descended upon Europe, they are cutting a swath through certain factions and are destroying all opposition, what do you do?
a. Outnumber them. Surround them. Show them who the REAL horde is!
b. Defend Chokepoints with fortified positions and highly skilled, heavily armored troops.
c. Use my influence to call a Crusade/Jihad.
d. The horde is of no consequence to me. I’ll let them pick off my rivals while I expand elsewhere.
13. Rome has fallen to an outside invader; the Pope is obviously displeased about this turn of events. How do you react to the developing situation?
a. After wiping our swords clean we turn and finish the Pope.
b. Gift territory to the Pope between ourselves and our worst enemy.
c. I capture Rome from the invaders and gift the city back to the Holy Father.
d. As long as the Pope is alive I couldn’t care less, how else could I crusade?
14. Who do you tend to choose as allies for your Empire?
a. I forge alliances with everyone in exchange for their money, then use that money to build troops and slaughter them.
b. The factions around me, all of them, at least until I can build my strength to be greater than theirs.
c. I enter into long lasting, strong alliances with nations far away from me. That way I may expand without hesitation or hindrance.
d. Alliances cannot be trusted, but they can confuse my enemies and even delay a coming war.
15. Your economy is stagnate, how do you expand your economic base to fuel your empire?
a. Through rampant pillaging, killing, sacking and piracy. When the map is nearly conquered then I begin to think about ports.
b. Ports, roads, and farms will be my salvation. My production and income cannot be beat.
c. Selling alliances and maps will gain me much needed extra income to build a formidable trade empire.
d. I use a combination of merchants and diplomatic maneuvers to gain extra income and use that to fuel my conquests.
CATEGORY A.
THE PATH OF THE BLITZER.
Besides, what good is peace and prosperity when we can build a glorious new future on the broken bodies and charred corpses of the vanquished?
~Pizzaguy.
A. Minor: You have been known to blitz on occasion. You can be aggressive when the situation demands it, and have a firm grasp of the fundamentals of blitzing.
A. Major: You consider yourself to be a blitzer. Aggressive warfare is clearly your forte, you like catching the enemy unprepared, or just prefer to bring the fight to the enemy instead of standing around and waiting. Your opponents are always too passive, and you're too impatient to wait for them to come to you.
A .Dedicated: You're a devastating blitz God. Your armies stand astride the world like a colossus. The idea of trade or diplomacy is totally alien to you, because it is far more profitable and satisfying to destroy your enemies than to sit down and drink earl grey tea with them. The idea of defense makes your stomach turn, and you've never once kept even one stack of troops standing still for a single turn. You've sacked and pillaged your way across the world like a wave of death, and you only know what it is to be a dreadful leader. The ways of chivalry and honor mean nothing to you, and alliances never last. The Pope is your hated enemy, useful only for calling crusades or being an interesting head atop a pike, due to his silly hat. The Mongol horde runs and hides in fear of your vast army. Only Askthepizzaguy truly understands you.
B CATEGORY.
THE PATH OF THE TURTLE.
"All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us...they can't get away this time."
~ Atrrib. to Chesty Puller.
B. MINOR: You know how to turtle, you know it’s basic fundamentals, but you’re not a true turtler. You prefer to be defensive but you’re not unfamiliar when it comes to attacking an enemy faction.
B. MAJOR: You consider yourself to be a turtle. The defensive war is your specialty and you know how to build a faction up on the backs of your farmers and merchants. You forfeit the initiative of an aggressive war to occupy fortified positions and heavy stone walls. Woe to he that would challenge such impressive obstacles. Your opponents are always the aggressor, yet they always meet the same fate; dead upon the battlements.
B. DEDICATED: You are the undisputed master of turtling, the walls of your fortress are a rock upon which the word’s factions have broken themselves. Time and time again, be you in Spain or Anatolia, your soldiers man the battlements and throw back the tide of invaders. Your troops know no equals; they are the finest available and the best equipped. They fear not the rain of arrows safe within their glinting steel armor. Your enemies are numerous but your defenses cannot be toppled. You are the immovable object, and not even the irresistible force can move you. Pity is given to any faction that eyes your land with jealous eyes, for thousands of men shall die trying to take your fortified positions.
C CATEGORY.
PATH OF THE DIPLOMAT.
Every one admits how praiseworthy it is in a prince to keep faith, and to live with integrity and not with craft. Nevertheless our experience has been that those princes who have done great things have held good faith of little account, and have known how to circumvent the intellect of men by craft, and in the end have overcome those who have relied on their word
Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince, Chapter 18
Minors: You're a skilled diplomat who understands how to use charm and grace to solve problems, rather than brute force. You have been known to turn a nation against another, and benefit from it.
Majors: You're a cunning, cold, calculating Orator, who uses his embassies across the world to sow seeds of dissention and bring the profits of other nations to your own doorstep. You could sell snow to a Viking, and trade him a plot of land in the Sahara Desert for his castle near Oslo.
Dedicated: You are Machiavelli reborn. Your forked tongue is so twisted that even the Pope doesn't know you're Satan himself. You could open wine bottles with that thing. Your agents are trained to infiltrate, convince, inebriate, distract, destroy, and overthrow other regimes. You don't need to send armies to do your bidding because your agents could buy and sell the entire world. Your lies are so grandiose and unbelievable that people are certain you must be telling the truth. Your reputation is impeccable, yet all who deal with you are found dead shortly thereafter. Your favorite position is crouching behind your neighbor, dagger in hand, with a smile on your face. You've brought down entire empires with just a trio of men. You know the value of chivalry and have a perfect 10 rating. People know you must be honorable, because you're such a magnanimous ruler. Little do they know that behind that facade of truth and justice you are the reaper of men's souls and the master of destinies. Your black heart beats beneath a coat of gold paint.
D CATEGORY
THE BALANCED PATH
Let your plans be dark and as impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.
~ Sun Tzu
Minor: You demonstrate the ability to change your tactics on the fly, you don’t shackle yourself to one doctrine often and indeed, you have been known to branch into other tenets of war to further your needs given the strategic situation.
Major: A general of worldly views is what you are. You incorporate the better parts of the diplomat, the blitzer, and the turtler to create that which is formidable in of itself, a warrior who looks at a situation from every angle before they act. You have slaughtered factions within only a few turns, you have brought down great empires with the stroke of a pen, and you have slain many thousands of warriors upon the gates of fortresses. Truly for you, war is a beast that is always changing.
Dedicated: You demonstrate a true mastery and understanding of the concepts of warfare, when your enemy is strong you feign weakness, when he is weak you strike hard. You deceive your allies and never expect an alliance to hold longer than it takes you to gather your forces. Your generals are among the greatest heroes of the world and the greatest villains a like. You are nothing if not pragmatic; upon your own shifting tactics your empire has been built, your foes know not whether to fear you.. or befriend you. And in that.. you have already won.
SCORING
The way this test works is there are four categories. Each letter is related to a category. One answer in a certain category nets you one point toward that overall strategy.
Get enough points in a category and you’ll get certain “rewards” at the end of the quiz showing you what strategy you lean toward. There are a total of 15 points to be spread among the categories and 3 “levels” that particular strategy sees itself employed in your Total War ventures.
The levels work as followed.
Dedicated: 13+ points in one category means you are a dedicated user of this strategy. Nothing else really matters to you.
Major: 8-12 points in one category means you are a major user of this tactic. Its something you use a lot, but you know how to do other things.
Minor: 4-7 in one category denotes you one minor mastery of that tactic. This likely isn't your main tactic.
0-3 points in a category means that strategy really isn’t your thing, and it’s not something you would generally do given a situation.
If you by chance score three catagories at 5 each, then you are automatically granted the "Dedicated" reward of the D catagory!
If by chance you score something akin to a 4/4/4/3, then you are automatically granted the "Dedicated" reward of the D category
Mark down your answers and tally your score, scroll down to the bottom to see what kind of player you are!
1. You’ve just hit the campaign map, what’s the first thing you do before anything else?
a. Go bankrupt spamming troops and attack the AI!
b. Start building an infrastructure. I need money to conquer!
c. Make alliances. I’ll need friends if I’m to expand!
d. Build troops and develop an economy.
2. Things are not looking well, your faction starts with few provinces and your income is falling fast, what’s your move to get rid of the debt?
a. Raise taxes to maximum and sack as many provinces as possible while leaving no troops behind to defend.
b. Disband the more expensive units in my army and focus on building up.
c. Seek alliances and hope to secure tribute, maybe sell some lands I don’t need.
d. Sack a few provinces but still hold back for defense, I can’t leave myself vulnerable.
3. Your faction is recovering from its terrible start but one of your neighbors seems to be getting powerful. Your strength seems equal for now but if left unchecked they may prove a problem. What shall you do?
a. Attack and pillage their greatest castle, leave their capital in ruins to make sure their economy will be crippled for years to come.
b. I continue to build my strength and tech up so I have the advantage.
c. Seek to ally with them, apart we are weak but together we are strong.
d. Nothing. We are equal now, we will be equal later.
4. The Pope has called for you to stop the bloodshed of your fellow Christians; however you were not the aggressor in the war!
a. I continue the war and wipe out my enemy for daring to attack me. If the Pope continues his pestering, he’ll be next!
b. Victory means nothing if my empire is excommunicated. I pull back my forces and wait out the grace period.
c. The will of God is a fickle thing, I build reputation with the pope through gifts and if that fails the assassin’s blade shall find its way to the holy father’s throat.
d. I take stock of the situation and take whatever action shall benefit me more. If that means excommunication then so be it!
5. A crusade/Jihad has been called, despite whatever is going on at your home provinces it is expected of you to join. What is your choice?
a. I called the Jihad/Crusade myself, and my entire standing army has joined it.
b. I answer the call but only with limited troops, I still must think of my home provinces.
c. I use the chance of the crusade to build relations with the Pope. Once my troops have done the work, I shall gift the captured settlement to the Papacy.
d. A crusade? Sounds like the perfect chance to build a crusader empire to me.
6. Enemy agents are wreaking havoc in your lands, it’s taken you some time but you’ve cornered one on the map and figured out what empire they are originating from. What is your response?
a. Once I eliminate their home faction, the agents will be gone.
b. Place spies in every settlement for defensive purposes.
c. Use assassins to silence them for good.
d. Both B and C.
7. Your greatest thrill when playing Total War is…
a. Slaying the Pope. I am your God now.
b. Building a mighty kingdom whose tech is a marvel.
c. Watching the factions dance as I pull the strings, not even the Pope is immune to my diplomats!
d. One thing? I GOTTA PICK ONE THING!? AAAARRGH *brain explodes*
8. Do you try to get generals with high Dread or high Chivalry?
a. What’s Chivalry?
b. Chivalry. They make much better governors.
c. Chivalry. Exterminating prisoners only hurts my relations!
d. Both, they have their uses.
9. What is the state of your Empire by turn 30?
a. Bored because there’s no one left to kill.
b. My tech and troop quality is amazing, if I wanted I could conquer the world.
c. My reputation with nearly every faction is amazing. I could declare war upon the pope’s own mother and the Holy Father would side with me!
d. My kingdom is formidable yes, but there’s still much to overcome.
10. What is your strategy for dealing with enemy armies in the field?
a. Using low quality troops and mercenaries I kill the enemy general and route his forces at all costs, caring little for casualties.
b. Using the only the best troops I form up in a line and fight them man for man, I try to flank and wear him down but try not to incur too many casualties.
c. Assassinate their general and bribe them. Enemy army? Oh, you mean my loyal troops.
d. I use ambushes, bridges, and forts to force the enemy to fight the battle I want.
11. You’ve run up against a tough enemy garrison, it looks as if the enemy’s got some heavy hitters inside. How do you deal with it?
a. Use mostly cavalry with a high dread gen, who are vastly outnumbered by the garrison, route the enemy force quickly when they sally.
b. I settle in for a siege, I’m in no rush.
c. Wreak havoc with agents by destroying public buildings and try to force a rebellion with spies.
d. Spy opens the gate and our armies rush the center to hold it for 3 min while sustaining as few casualties as possible.
12. The Golden Horde has descended upon Europe, they are cutting a swath through certain factions and are destroying all opposition, what do you do?
a. Outnumber them. Surround them. Show them who the REAL horde is!
b. Defend Chokepoints with fortified positions and highly skilled, heavily armored troops.
c. Use my influence to call a Crusade/Jihad.
d. The horde is of no consequence to me. I’ll let them pick off my rivals while I expand elsewhere.
13. Rome has fallen to an outside invader; the Pope is obviously displeased about this turn of events. How do you react to the developing situation?
a. After wiping our swords clean we turn and finish the Pope.
b. Gift territory to the Pope between ourselves and our worst enemy.
c. I capture Rome from the invaders and gift the city back to the Holy Father.
d. As long as the Pope is alive I couldn’t care less, how else could I crusade?
14. Who do you tend to choose as allies for your Empire?
a. I forge alliances with everyone in exchange for their money, then use that money to build troops and slaughter them.
b. The factions around me, all of them, at least until I can build my strength to be greater than theirs.
c. I enter into long lasting, strong alliances with nations far away from me. That way I may expand without hesitation or hindrance.
d. Alliances cannot be trusted, but they can confuse my enemies and even delay a coming war.
15. Your economy is stagnate, how do you expand your economic base to fuel your empire?
a. Through rampant pillaging, killing, sacking and piracy. When the map is nearly conquered then I begin to think about ports.
b. Ports, roads, and farms will be my salvation. My production and income cannot be beat.
c. Selling alliances and maps will gain me much needed extra income to build a formidable trade empire.
d. I use a combination of merchants and diplomatic maneuvers to gain extra income and use that to fuel my conquests.
CATEGORY A.
THE PATH OF THE BLITZER.
Besides, what good is peace and prosperity when we can build a glorious new future on the broken bodies and charred corpses of the vanquished?
~Pizzaguy.
A. Minor: You have been known to blitz on occasion. You can be aggressive when the situation demands it, and have a firm grasp of the fundamentals of blitzing.
A. Major: You consider yourself to be a blitzer. Aggressive warfare is clearly your forte, you like catching the enemy unprepared, or just prefer to bring the fight to the enemy instead of standing around and waiting. Your opponents are always too passive, and you're too impatient to wait for them to come to you.
A .Dedicated: You're a devastating blitz God. Your armies stand astride the world like a colossus. The idea of trade or diplomacy is totally alien to you, because it is far more profitable and satisfying to destroy your enemies than to sit down and drink earl grey tea with them. The idea of defense makes your stomach turn, and you've never once kept even one stack of troops standing still for a single turn. You've sacked and pillaged your way across the world like a wave of death, and you only know what it is to be a dreadful leader. The ways of chivalry and honor mean nothing to you, and alliances never last. The Pope is your hated enemy, useful only for calling crusades or being an interesting head atop a pike, due to his silly hat. The Mongol horde runs and hides in fear of your vast army. Only Askthepizzaguy truly understands you.
B CATEGORY.
THE PATH OF THE TURTLE.
"All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us...they can't get away this time."
~ Atrrib. to Chesty Puller.
B. MINOR: You know how to turtle, you know it’s basic fundamentals, but you’re not a true turtler. You prefer to be defensive but you’re not unfamiliar when it comes to attacking an enemy faction.
B. MAJOR: You consider yourself to be a turtle. The defensive war is your specialty and you know how to build a faction up on the backs of your farmers and merchants. You forfeit the initiative of an aggressive war to occupy fortified positions and heavy stone walls. Woe to he that would challenge such impressive obstacles. Your opponents are always the aggressor, yet they always meet the same fate; dead upon the battlements.
B. DEDICATED: You are the undisputed master of turtling, the walls of your fortress are a rock upon which the word’s factions have broken themselves. Time and time again, be you in Spain or Anatolia, your soldiers man the battlements and throw back the tide of invaders. Your troops know no equals; they are the finest available and the best equipped. They fear not the rain of arrows safe within their glinting steel armor. Your enemies are numerous but your defenses cannot be toppled. You are the immovable object, and not even the irresistible force can move you. Pity is given to any faction that eyes your land with jealous eyes, for thousands of men shall die trying to take your fortified positions.
C CATEGORY.
PATH OF THE DIPLOMAT.
Every one admits how praiseworthy it is in a prince to keep faith, and to live with integrity and not with craft. Nevertheless our experience has been that those princes who have done great things have held good faith of little account, and have known how to circumvent the intellect of men by craft, and in the end have overcome those who have relied on their word
Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince, Chapter 18
Minors: You're a skilled diplomat who understands how to use charm and grace to solve problems, rather than brute force. You have been known to turn a nation against another, and benefit from it.
Majors: You're a cunning, cold, calculating Orator, who uses his embassies across the world to sow seeds of dissention and bring the profits of other nations to your own doorstep. You could sell snow to a Viking, and trade him a plot of land in the Sahara Desert for his castle near Oslo.
Dedicated: You are Machiavelli reborn. Your forked tongue is so twisted that even the Pope doesn't know you're Satan himself. You could open wine bottles with that thing. Your agents are trained to infiltrate, convince, inebriate, distract, destroy, and overthrow other regimes. You don't need to send armies to do your bidding because your agents could buy and sell the entire world. Your lies are so grandiose and unbelievable that people are certain you must be telling the truth. Your reputation is impeccable, yet all who deal with you are found dead shortly thereafter. Your favorite position is crouching behind your neighbor, dagger in hand, with a smile on your face. You've brought down entire empires with just a trio of men. You know the value of chivalry and have a perfect 10 rating. People know you must be honorable, because you're such a magnanimous ruler. Little do they know that behind that facade of truth and justice you are the reaper of men's souls and the master of destinies. Your black heart beats beneath a coat of gold paint.
D CATEGORY
THE BALANCED PATH
Let your plans be dark and as impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.
~ Sun Tzu
Minor: You demonstrate the ability to change your tactics on the fly, you don’t shackle yourself to one doctrine often and indeed, you have been known to branch into other tenets of war to further your needs given the strategic situation.
Major: A general of worldly views is what you are. You incorporate the better parts of the diplomat, the blitzer, and the turtler to create that which is formidable in of itself, a warrior who looks at a situation from every angle before they act. You have slaughtered factions within only a few turns, you have brought down great empires with the stroke of a pen, and you have slain many thousands of warriors upon the gates of fortresses. Truly for you, war is a beast that is always changing.
Dedicated: You demonstrate a true mastery and understanding of the concepts of warfare, when your enemy is strong you feign weakness, when he is weak you strike hard. You deceive your allies and never expect an alliance to hold longer than it takes you to gather your forces. Your generals are among the greatest heroes of the world and the greatest villains a like. You are nothing if not pragmatic; upon your own shifting tactics your empire has been built, your foes know not whether to fear you.. or befriend you. And in that.. you have already won.