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Proletariat
10-04-2008, 06:48
I have 93 dollars cash in my pocket, and I want to buy a barrel of oil.

Please direct me to the closest oil barrel store so I can make my purchase.

Thanks

Strike For The South
10-04-2008, 07:08
You dont have 93 dollars in your pocket.

Mikeus Caesar
10-04-2008, 07:23
You dont have 93 dollars in your pocket.

I have AU$53.15. If i go to an ATM i can easily make that $103.15, or $153.15. Now tell me where we can buy a barrel of oil, damn you.

:clown:

Ice
10-04-2008, 07:23
www.zecco.com
www.etrade.com
www.scottrade.com

I could go on... you get the point

KukriKhan
10-05-2008, 03:24
I have 93 dollars cash in my pocket, and I want to buy a barrel of oil.

Please direct me to the closest oil barrel store so I can make my purchase.

Thanks


Hop into your li'l putt-putt and hie y'self to Pennsylvania (http://pennsylvania.hometownlocator.com/features/Cultural,class,oilfield.cfm) (the closest oil barrel store). $93 might buy the contents - today, but the barrel itself may cost you upwards of $650, presuming you desire the classic 42-gallon wooden whiskey barrel of oil. Or perhaps you have your own container?

Or maybe you meant olive oil, or whale oil... a whole 'nuther kettle o'fish. As it were. So to speak.

Additionally, UPS would probably deliver said barrel-full of oil right to your front door for a slight surcharge, plus they'd probably try to talk you into buying a full 55 gallon steel drum-full, which might put you over budget.

I do wonder: what's a nice girl like you doing with pockets, anyway? And ones with cash, no less? Maybe I could interest you in a small share of a tiny stock in a mortgage default swap fund. Just use your paypal account and send funds to yourcongresscritter@usgov.gov

It's patriotic, yanno.

:)<----obligatory smilie

Gregoshi
10-05-2008, 06:07
You dont have 93 dollars in your pocket.
Let's not get crude. ~D

Big_John
10-05-2008, 06:11
Let's not get crude. ~Da refined joke! :2thumbsup:

Gregoshi
10-05-2008, 07:22
a refined joke! :2thumbsup:
Which yielded a funnier byproduct. :laugh4:

Martok
10-05-2008, 17:05
a refined joke! :2thumbsup:
Wow, someone out-punned the Punmaster. I am in awe. :bow:

Banquo's Ghost
10-05-2008, 17:55
Wow, someone out-punned the Punmaster. I am in awe. :bow:

I thought it a little crude, myself. :wink:

Gregoshi
10-05-2008, 18:34
I thought it a little crude, myself. :wink:

A refined joke! :2thumbsup:


BG has Lemur's Disease. How sad. I just outright stole Big John's pun for the deja vu laugh. Oh, the shame...:shame:

Banquo's Ghost
10-05-2008, 18:50
BG has Lemur's Disease. How sad.

:embarassed:

Arrgh.

Louis VI the Fat
10-05-2008, 19:55
:embarassed:

Arrgh. Come on, no need to be completely petrified at a little Lemur's disease. This thread is still a barrel of laughs.

Lemur
10-05-2008, 20:06
I don't see why people get so bummed about Lemur's Disease. It's quite treatable. As diseases go, it's chronic as opposed to terminal. Think of it as a benign form of Herpes.

Gregoshi
10-05-2008, 22:30
This thread is still a barrel of laughs.
:laugh4: Yes, it's hysderrickle.

Big_John
10-05-2008, 22:55
the flow of this thread has seriously tanked. creative wells have run dry.

Crazed Rabbit
10-06-2008, 02:31
Yes, some people need to get crackin' (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cracking_(chemistry)) on better puns.

CR

Gregoshi
10-06-2008, 06:29
Yes, some people need to get crackin' (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cracking_(chemistry)) on better puns.

CR
We're just pumping this thread for all it's worth...which was about $94 (USD) per barrel on Friday.

pevergreen
10-06-2008, 06:41
goan

:laugh4:

Crazed Rabbit
10-06-2008, 06:54
We're just pumping this thread for all it's worth...which was about $94 (USD) per barrel on Friday.

Too bad it's got such sour results. ~;p

CR
(EDIT - to be clear, that is another pun on crude oil, and not a reflection of my feelings about your puns)

Big_John
10-06-2008, 08:01
(EDIT - to be clear, that is another pun on crude oil, and not a reflection of my feelings about your puns)sweet.

Koga No Goshi
10-06-2008, 08:44
We're just pumping this thread for all it's worth...which was about $94 (USD) per barrel on Friday.

They're still trading them in USD?

Gregoshi
10-06-2008, 14:48
(EDIT - to be clear, that is another pun on crude oil, and not a reflection of my feelings about your puns)
:laugh4: No problem - if the shoe fits... :shrug:

Proletariat
10-08-2008, 01:24
You dont have 93 dollars in your pocket.

I most certainly do. If you're just jealous of my riches let me know, if you can scrape up 46.5, I'll go havsies with you on our own barrel of oil, with an option to buy my half on a generous payment plan.

I didn't know about the barrel, Kukri. Thanks for pointing this out.

Thanks to everyone for salvaging what I thought would be a hilarious thread, and then lost heart and gave up on it and hoped no one would read. Sometimes it takes some very deep digging to pump the funny from a thread but it's turned out that oil's well.

Reverend Joe
10-08-2008, 03:25
**** puns. The entire world's economy sucks. So let's get drunk and stay that way until it solves itself or we die. Either way, problem solved.

:barrel: ~:mecry: :barrel:

Gregoshi
10-08-2008, 04:21
:barrel: ~:mecry: :barrel:

Cue the musical pun...:barrel: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LwPdL3jXDw&feature=related) (click on the barrel)

KarlXII
10-08-2008, 05:43
*walks on stage* Ahem.

*thinks of oil pun*
Err....
Uhm...
Damn....

Why is my mind so polluted with this?

No? Not even a dum dum tish? Alright.:wall: *creeps off stage*


:sweatdrop:

Strike For The South
10-08-2008, 05:43
I most certainly do. If you're just jealous of my riches let me know, if you can scrape up 46.5, I'll go havsies with you on our own barrel of oil, with an option to buy my half on a generous payment plan.

I didn't know about the barrel, Kukri. Thanks for pointing this out.

Thanks to everyone for salvaging what I thought would be a hilarious thread, and then lost heart and gave up on it and hoped no one would read. Sometimes it takes some very deep digging to pump the funny from a thread but it's turned out that oil's well.

I have merley 2 pence

Gregoshi
10-08-2008, 13:05
I have merley 2 pence

Hopefully, the price of oil drops... ~D