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The Stranger
11-02-2008, 20:42
:balloon:

Mellow

this haunting moment

retreating edges
of a burning picture
your features
crudely fading

in the smoke
curling itself
around our eyes

I feel only regret
and your soothing touch
of smoke


Glazgo-City

I am waiting on a corner
round which satan stalks
the weak and the weary
men without hope or gain

vicious voices that talk
despair and hate into
the lame so they'll turn
against their brothers

the city which waits for
her death a veil of light
covers her head the sky
has shed all of her tears

no more stars to guide me
through this sea of streets
where I'd let my mind wander
and lost it

I am waiting on a corner
till it comes back to me

Joker Obama Girl
11-04-2008, 03:43
Excellent! Mind if I butt in? :P


Cry at Night

Lying in bed,
Feeling dead.
How could I have said,
What I said?

I cry at night,
When there is no light.
I cry at night,
When there’s no one in sight

I never got,
A second shot.
Not a lot,
To ask I thought.

I cry at night,
Out of sight,
I die at night,
Can’t make it right.

I don’t want them to see,
What a wreck I turned out to be.
I wonder if she,
Ever thinks of me.

I cry at night,
When there is no light
I cry all night,
Can’t make it right.

I stay strong all day,
So they won’t see me that way.
Don’t want them to say,
That she’s making me pay.

I cry at night,
Cry with all my might.
I lie at night,
Cry till morning light.

Joker Obama Girl
11-04-2008, 15:52
If that did not hit you the right way, here is another. :P

Loser's Lament

I wish to write a poem of
love, and all that it entails.
But when I imagine love,
my poetic genius fails.

How can I write of such desire,
when love I’ve never known?
T’would be like writing of a flyer,
when you have never flown.

I am just a distant dreamer,
far removed from reality.
What good does it do to love her,
when she will not love me?

Why did I ever choose her,
to love with such devotion?
I am just a desperate loser,
to feel such emotion.


I am not an emo or anything, just couldn't find any happy stuff. :P I write mostly comedy, so it tends to be satirical or depressing. :P

naut
11-05-2008, 12:14
TS, I like your first one in the sense that it's almost touchable, tangible, but not quite, just like the topic. The second one, I love the imagery, reminds me of where I live, a nameless town, a nameless street and the nameless faces that pass me by. I love how it closes with the opening line(s), it adds to the sense that you have let your "mind wander and lost it". I love the imagery of the sky having shed all her tears.

Joker Obama Girl, both of yours really speak to me. I can connect to them, relate to them, since they are place's I have been emotionally. The repetition in the first one really adds to the sense of loneliness. And I love the metaphor "T’would be like writing of a flyer, when you have never flown.", brilliant. Also, I'm not sure I have many happy poems, or stories either to be honest.

I'll also share, with the first serious poem I wrote.

I Once Did Roam

Brush the blossoms flourishing
Amidst this, the bronzed wall
A fertile greenery emerging,
Does surround this intrepid waterfall
As it dribbles forth, drawn through the singing glow;
A cloud of bracken hides splendour, from the westward blow
Of the softened linen lily, with a gilded glistened core,
Touched by none; countenance vivid, raw.

This ocean meets the fragile stone,
And greets it gently, with a pearly kiss
Placed upon its tarnished tainted throne,
And lingers thus, as the mute noonday mist;
Above, dark ravens caress the swelling aqua crest,
As change embroiders a silver rest,
The winds of the sun do shift,
And through me run; burning a layered rift.

The grains of swirling tides reverse
As the soft pipes of life play on;
And along nature's path existence does traverse,
Forever more endeared, of ages long forgone;
Whilst the glistening sun unfolds like frosted dew,
The clouds reflect the passing, of the life they view;
And in amongst wildflowers I once did roam,
And may these lasting winds blow me, safely home.

Joker Obama Girl
11-05-2008, 17:39
Joker Obama Girl, both of yours really speak to me. I can connect to them, relate to them, since they are place's I have been emotionally. The repetition in the first one really adds to the sense of loneliness. And I love the metaphor "T’would be like writing of a flyer, when you have never flown.", brilliant. Also, I'm not sure I have many happy poems, or stories either to be honest.

Thanks Rythmic! I was trying to add an element of humor to Loser's Lament to try to lighten the feeling. I hope that worked out well.



I'll also share, with the first serious poem I wrote.

I Once Did Roam

Brush the blossoms flourishing
Amidst this, the bronzed wall
A fertile greenery emerging,
Does surround this intrepid waterfall
As it dribbles forth, drawn through the singing glow;
A cloud of bracken hides splendour, from the westward blow
Of the softened linen lily, with a gilded glistened core,
Touched by none; countenance vivid, raw.

This ocean meets the fragile stone,
And greets it gently, with a pearly kiss
Placed upon its tarnished tainted throne,
And lingers thus, as the mute noonday mist;
Above, dark ravens caress the swelling aqua crest,
As change embroiders a silver rest,
The winds of the sun do shift,
And through me run; burning a layered rift.

The grains of swirling tides reverse
As the soft pipes of life play on;
And along nature's path existence does traverse,
Forever more endeared, of ages long forgone;
Whilst the glistening sun unfolds like frosted dew,
The clouds reflect the passing, of the life they view;
And in amongst wildflowers I once did roam,
And may these lasting winds blow me, safely home.

I gotta say...WOW! lol This is really good stuff. I read it four times over. :P I love the way you describe things. I could honestly never write anything half this good. If you have done any others, I would love to see them too.

The Stranger
11-16-2008, 18:03
I.

my mind is restless
disturbed water nothing there
but that eternal grey blanket

a twist of awareness
too small to be conscious
too big to be denied life
fleeting as a name

the fog lifting above
rooftops the fading mark
of another sleepless night

winter in bloodshot eyes


II.

still water nothing there
between the pillars of light
a ship sails from the dark

city of Venice
where the market salesmen
reign at night
they lurk behind the columns
of Piazza de San Marco
and in the crooked alleys
near Galle Zaguri

deserted place
the tourists have faded
with the fog they move
only in twilight

still water nothing there
but the ancient empty streets
too dead for dreaming



(still working on the titles)

The last two lines belong to Bob Dylan.

Monk
11-21-2008, 21:29
Great stuff posted thus far. :book:

Keep it coming! :thumbsup:

naut
11-25-2008, 02:46
Nice TS. The first one has a sense of confusion or "the unknown" to it. The second I like the use of the words, like how the tourists have faded, etc. and how it builds to a conclusion.

The Stranger
11-26-2008, 00:32
thanx rythmic

heres a new one

Sirius Moonlight


we are nothing but
stardust near the coast
of somalia we seize
suns and their dreams
gravitating around
each other in imperfect
circles

my desert eagle
loaded and sharp
feels heavy in my hand
the dogstar blesses
the full metal jackets
in my heart

my brothers carry oil
in their veins
wormholes in their eyes
emptiness inside

we are
the good and the young
gods
and solemnly pledge
to fight till the dawn
of death

Thermal
11-27-2008, 00:04
all very good, i especially like rythmatic's, heres a few my friend done (someone of these we've done together) it would happen to be be a female friend, shes fab :2thumbsup:


waiting


A pearly rock, two grubby stiles,
A setting sun, a thousand miles.

I’m waiting for nothing, I’m carved into stone,
Still like a statue, all on my own.

My heart is not beating, nothing is sound;
All I can hear is the wind on the ground.

The waves of the sea are soft and at rest,
They speak not to me, they quiver at best.

I see a small vessel, way out at sea,
It catches the fish, not noticing me.

The sun has now crept behind nature’s calm green,
The stars shining brighter than I’ve ever seen.

What I’ve been waiting for, I don’t even know,
I stand up and stretch, preparing to go.

Then all of a sudden, a hand touches mine,
A statue is waiting, stood straight as a line.

I smile as I stand and I kiss the sweet stone,
I watch as I realise how much I have grown.

This is not the end, there is much more to learn,
But I’ll watch ‘til there’s simply nothing to earn.

We’re waiting for nothing, we’re carved into stone,
Still like a statue, but never alone.



Paint My Mask On Thicker


I’ll paint my mask on thicker,
Pray it hides my fears
And hope that it won’t wash away
With my falling tears

I’ll paint my mask on thicker,
A complex web of lies
To protect the real me from sight
And turn away your eyes

I’ll paint my mask on thicker
It’s smudging slightly now
But I will not drop the act just yet
I really don’t know how

I’ll paint my mask on thicker
And a smile upon my lips
But it’s crumbling around the edges,
Don’t hate me when it slips...


Inevitable slide


Think of two people
As one and the same
Not quite schizophrenic, not quite insane
Imagine the person of one and two
Fighting with life but not knowing who
Or what, to ask or say
To go or stay
Of repeated thoughts commencing decay
The ultimate prison, without doors or walls
Windows or floors
Just the skin and bone
I find myself alone
Wandering the eternal shore
Forevermore


gimme!

So Gimmie All Your Poison
And Gimmie All Your Pills
And Gimmie All Your Hopeless Hearts
And Make Me
ill
You're Running After Something
That You'll Never Kill
If This Is What You Want Then
Fire
at
Will


by the way shes isnt an emo, more scene, you no those harajuku girls that have luminous tops and 6 foot heels lolz

Thermal
11-27-2008, 00:12
these few are my own material, baring in mind im no where near as good as any of you, or my friends....


Friend or Foe?

sweet because your stuck in a rut
gives me a sick feeling inside my gut
friends because your lonely and sad
yet if you talk to me you must be mad
kind because you don't want a fight
all this drama i can't believe my sight
friendly because i have something you like
but what your really thinking is hes far too tight
pleasant because your mates told you to be
you have a mind of your own thats clear to me

harsh because you don't like me at all
at least i no where i stand at least i can stand tall
mean because i am different to you
at least your honest and tell the truth
hate me because of your jealous ways
so you do envy me maybe you would say
evil because i behave quite strange
finally someone who speaks with a fair range
critizing because i am too poor its true
but its a fair insult my clothes aren't new

would i rather hav a true enemy or a false friend

for me
love thy enemy any day



this one is quite emotive, i'll block out the swear words LOL


fury from the heart

i gave you a chance,
i considered you a friend,
but you broke my trust,
and that is something you can never mend.

you caused endless havoc and ruined your friends minds,
your petty life and horrid ways is clearly a moral crime,
i wish i could turn back time and that i never met you,
just thank your lucky stars that your demise is not yet through.

you had my faith you had my attention you had all the friends you needed,
but u destroyed your life and cursed us all then u begged and pleaded,
you throught you could mess us around,
but you thought wrong jerk,
you wanted us to love you,
but it looks like it didnt work.

your malice filled personality seeped through every corner,
so it wasn't long before we discovered the devil in your persona,
you annoyed us all you self centred fool,
but the jokes on you scum filled rat,
you're a nasty piece of grimy work ,
and a horrid piece of tat.


so the reason that this poem was wrote to inform you be careful, for certain people claim good intentions but are really very evil



and finally...

Outta my HeAd!?

if i was a bubble an you were a blob, we'd have a kid and call it a flob

if i was an animal and you were a grub, i would suck you up and then play with some bugs

if i was a emo and you were a nerd, we would do experiments with a possessed turd

if i was some fabric softener and you were a dribble, i would scrub you clean and then eat some dog nibbles

if i was a girl and you had a dolly, i would stab it with pins and call it my trolley

if i was a mexican wobble and you were a turkish moggle, i would caress your legs with a pan of oil

if i was a swizzle and you were a flop, i would feed my baby a yak and give it slop

if i was a geek and you were my braces, i would take you to yiggle wok races

if i was a lava lamp and you were some wax, i'd tuffle up weed and sit on an axe

if i was an uggish poke and you were a cheese mak muffin, i would go jogging with a demented puffin

if i was a destressed mop and you were an ivory reiggit, i would add some wovlf to a tubby migit

if i was a simple spoon and you were a protective tuna, i would put you in a can and eat you much sooner

if i was play dough and you were a lung, i would fill your mouth with a rack full of dung

if i was a cumfuddled cell and you were a muzzizzled dove, i would look at some seaweed and find some deep love

if i was a button and you were the sky, i would make you a dodo flavoured pie

if i was a marshgellow and you were an ape, i would protest with figgles about plants being raped

if i was a penny and you were a tap, i would force a famous brocolli to sit up and rap

if i was a constipated sewer and you were a grape, i'd grow a juddle and show it on tape

if i was a marshland and you were a rake, i would get a riddleruff to dig up a lake

if i was a tablet and you were a cleaner, i would make little aliens to make your life greener



lolz baring in mind this is nonsense, i like it though :clown: enjoy

The Stranger
11-27-2008, 19:03
"waiting" is pretty good!