View Full Version : On Fighting A Grizzly Bear
Strike For The South
11-22-2008, 21:28
Well I've decided. A grizzly bear would be the best challenge to me in a fight. But before I go to the tale of the tape, lets look at some of the challengers who didn't make the cut.
-Big Cats (Lions, Tigers, Mountain Lions) While very physically formidable these cats have one drawback. They cant stand so imagine how easy its to put it in a chokehold
Tale of the tape
Me: 6ft 245lbs
Bengal Tiger: 10ft 600lbs
Fight time: 30-45 seconds
How does it end?: I come in from behind and put the tiger in sleeper hold
-Great White Sharks. Once again very imposing however they have a glass nose. All the strength and biting power means nothing once I pop them in the nose.
Tale of the tape
Me: 6ft 245lbs
Great White: 20ft 5,000lbs
Fight time: 8 seconds
How does it end: I square and hit the thing right in its nose.
Now on to the Grizzly Bear
https://img246.imageshack.us/img246/8483/396grizzlybearstandingtb8.th.jpg (https://img246.imageshack.us/my.php?image=396grizzlybearstandingtb8.jpg)https://img246.imageshack.us/images/thpix.gif (http://g.imageshack.us/thpix.php)Nancy Boy
Tale of the Tape
Me: 6 ft 245 lbs
Grizzly: 8ft 1,000 lbs
What the Grizzly Bear has to do to win the fight
-Hit me, just once. Way I figure it I get hit in the face with one of those paws I'm going blind in one or both eyes and most likely I will start to cry.
What I have to do to win the fight
-Get inside and work the body. The bear is going to try to keep me at a distance using his superior reach and height against. I NEED to get inside and make the thing wish he didn't have ribs.
-Make the fight last. Many of the grizzly bears oppentes run or get there throat ripped out very early on. Which means the bear is poorly conditoned. The longer I drag this thing out, the more tired he gets.
Fight time: 10 rounds
How does it end: In round ten a tired SFTS just connects with one good body shot sending and exhausted Grizzly to the canvas. After a ten count SFTS picks the bear up, takes him home and makes him do tricks for him
I bet disco could take you!
Dutch_guy
11-22-2008, 22:14
10 rounds ? This guy did it in a mere 30 seconds, and got a prize to boot.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_VlVckrUgY&feature=related
:balloon2:
Yoyoma1910
11-22-2008, 22:20
200 on the bear to win.
LeftEyeNine
11-23-2008, 00:30
I'm not really sure about SFTS' physical existence however I'd bet even my head (which is precous and big in size) on his ego against anything.
LEN The Official "You Are Whom Chuck Norris Envied So Hard That He Invented His Round Kick While Beating The Hell Out Of God Saying 'Why Wasn't It Me, Huh ?' " Chanter of SFTS :smoking:
AlexanderSextus
11-23-2008, 00:55
Grizzly bear? PFFF. Strike should fight this guy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBTM6_l-Gdk
Strike For The South
11-23-2008, 01:00
Grizzly bear? PFFF. Strike should fight this guy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iBTM6_l-Gdk
Thats cute, he's playing karate man.
Samurai Waki
11-23-2008, 01:24
I bet you'd be about as succesful against a Grizzly Bear as Apollo Creed was against Drago.
what is the point of this thread? it's almost as pointless as my cow and sheep disscussion in backroom :laugh4:
Crazed Rabbit
11-23-2008, 01:48
-Make the fight last. Many of the grizzly bears oppentes run or get there throat ripped out very early on. Which means the bear is poorly conditoned. The longer I drag this thing out, the more tired he gets.
Um, what about Grizzlies fighting Grizzlies? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CaV-8QGVdro)
Sorry SFTS, but I think if you're close to the hit the bear, it is close enough to rip you apart, no matter how inside you get. As you can see from the link, they're no slouches at grappling, and they are eight feet tall and weigh a literal ton.
CR
AlexanderSextus
11-23-2008, 04:16
Thats cute, he's playing karate man.
LMAO none of anything he does in that clip has anything to do with karate.
He'd hand you your:daisy: on a plate before you could even *think* to hit him.
Look at this one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WV6JdzCbXFE
do you notice that this guy does two-finger push ups, one arm pull-ups, and can workout on a grip machine with over 50lbs on it? Still cute? or is he now BAD :daisy:????
Marshal Murat
11-23-2008, 04:29
https://i231.photobucket.com/albums/ee125/Tokugawa141/ArmingBears.jpg
Strike For The South
11-23-2008, 04:47
LMAO none of anything he does in that clip has anything to do with karate.
He'd hand you your :daisy: on a plate before you could even *think* to hit him.
Look at this one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WV6JdzCbXFE
do you notice that this guy does two-finger push ups, one arm pull-ups, and can workout on a grip machine with over 50lbs on it? Still cute? or is he now BAD :daisy:????
The sweating kind of turns me off
penguinking
11-23-2008, 07:11
You may be able to beat a bear, but can you beat a deer?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNGGbozilko&feature=related
Megas Methuselah
11-23-2008, 07:51
This thread is hilarious! :laugh4:
Louis VI the Fat
11-23-2008, 15:44
Come on, people, have a heart. What are you all poking fun at Strike for?
Of course Strike isn't really going to attack a bear. No, he is trying to tell us something. Can't you guys pick up on that? 'Fighting a Grizzly' is common slang for 'daisy' a bear. This is the the issue, what Strike is trying to tell us. It is a battle in his head, between acceptance of what he is, what he feels, and uber macho posing to shield himself from society's unacceptance.
If he finds warmth and acceptance here, he can come out. If not, presenting his doubts in the way he did, means he can hide back behind the safe comfort of his muscles, his macho posturing.
Fight your Grizzly (http://www.gaybeardating.com/?aff_id=google&aff_pg=3&aff_tr=1&s=free_db_search), Strike. We love you whatever you are, man.
AlexanderSextus
11-23-2008, 20:09
The sweating kind of turns me off
:inquisitive::inquisitive:
What the hell are you talking about? Who cares about that? The d00d is Awesome and PWNZ everything, Even Chuck norris!
I think you better start off with bears that have already had a few victories against people. There's that Panda that just got a great victory over a man that underestimated him, perhaps fly to China and beat that Panda before moving up to Grizzlies.
Kralizec
11-24-2008, 00:42
Remember to have someone tape it and put it on youtube.
El Diablo
11-24-2008, 02:44
Strike what your chances be with..
GRIZZLY BEAR GRYLLS??
Now that would be a fight!
seireikhaan
11-24-2008, 05:53
Strike, gotta remember one important thing about going in too tight; if the bear falls, its a BIG animal. Better to be ready to get out of the way if that thing comes down on you.
Interestingly, I had a short dream last night about going down my old neighborhood, a little snow was on the ground, and lo and behold, I look up and a lion is staring me down, looking kinda restless and hungry. I scuttle across the street, hoping to exploit all cat's greatest weakness; laziness. Alas, I was across the street, the lion looked across, and leaped the entire street(HUGE OMGWTF moment :sweatdrop:), bared its teeth at me, leaped straight at me, claws extended....
and I woke up. :smash:
GeneralHankerchief
11-24-2008, 06:55
Strike, gotta remember one important thing about going in too tight; if the bear falls, its a BIG animal. Better to be ready to get out of the way if that thing comes down on you.
Interestingly, I had a short dream last night about going down my old neighborhood, a little snow was on the ground, and lo and behold, I look up and a lion is staring me down, looking kinda restless and hungry. I scuttle across the street, hoping to exploit all cat's greatest weakness; laziness. Alas, I was across the street, the lion looked across, and leaped the entire street(HUGE OMGWTF moment :sweatdrop:), bared its teeth at me, leaped straight at me, claws extended....
and I woke up. :smash:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ujnZKRCzBY
9:03 in, khaan.
BTW, I'm not responsible for any long-lasting psychological effects on you considering your dreams. :smoking:
Strike For The South
11-25-2008, 05:14
Should I give the bear a blunt object to make it more fair? I was just looking in the mirror and realized I am the pinnacle of evolution. This bear stands no chance
:boxing:
seireikhaan
11-25-2008, 06:21
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ujnZKRCzBY
9:03 in, khaan.
BTW, I'm not responsible for any long-lasting psychological effects on you considering your dreams. :smoking:
This coming from the man who, by all apparent logic, is a closet pirate. :smash:
Btw, I've had weirder dreams. That lion had nothing on the Dragon dream I had a couple months ago. ~:pimp:
Dutch_guy
11-25-2008, 11:01
Should I give the bear a blunt object to make it more fair? I was just looking in the mirror and realized I am the pinnacle of evolution. This bear stands no chance
:boxing:
Well, you could always fight him blindfolded, to up the challenge a bit? The bear has claws man, he doesn't need a club...
:balloon2:
LeftEyeNine
11-25-2008, 12:52
Invent a laser gun and hand it over to him, SFTS ?
Hosakawa Tito
11-25-2008, 13:19
An exclusive behind the scenes video of SFTS training for his grizzly match. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWeNyT66IqI)
We don't need no stinking Marquess of Queensberry rules.
Strike For The South
11-25-2008, 15:56
Invent a laser gun and hand it over to him, SFTS ?
Well, you could always fight him blindfolded, to up the challenge a bit? The bear has claws man, he doesn't need a club...
:balloon2:
Both valid suggestions.
yesdachi
11-25-2008, 16:22
I would like some more information about the bear before I place my bet.
Is the bear also from Texas?
Is the bear ill-tempered?
http://www.ugo.com/movies/oj-simpsons-criminal-masterminds/images/dr-evil.jpg
Strike For The South
11-25-2008, 18:20
I would like some more information about the bear before I place my bet.
Is the bear also from Texas?
Is the bear ill-tempered?
No there bear is from Alaska
It will be the most ill-tempered I can find.
How to Fight a Bear (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvrvxmZ0jVg)
Kobayashi vs Giant Bear Eating Contest (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgqbCq_sxmo)
Yoyoma1910
11-26-2008, 02:39
No there bear is from Alaska
Why not Montana? Seems a Montana Grizzly would want to take down a Texan a bit more, and might already have a touch of experience from Texas sized tourists. If you're going with Alaska, why not go for a polar bear?
CountArach
11-26-2008, 13:35
I bet disco could take you!
Oh how I lol'ed.
Hosakawa Tito
11-26-2008, 17:17
Beware the Bear. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gRRnpqKzWk) Now we know why SFTS has such hostility toward bears.
omg I think I wet myself...
Beware the Bear. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gRRnpqKzWk) Now we know why SFTS has such hostility toward bears.
omg I think I wet myself...
Holy crap that's funny! I love the people toward the end that start socking him.
Yoyoma1910
11-27-2008, 19:38
Beware the Bear. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gRRnpqKzWk) Now we know why SFTS has such hostility toward bears.
omg I think I wet myself...
Time: 1:18. Someone took self defense classes.
ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88
11-30-2008, 17:43
Shoot it with a high power rifle, that should work, won't it :clown:?
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