View Full Version : Strike, I have found you a nice Jewish girl...
Hooahguy
12-01-2010, 06:21
Shes my cousin, so be nice. Shes 19, and quite pretty, (I saw her today).
Now all you have to do, Strike, is convert, learn Torah all day, and dress like this guy:
https://i199.photobucket.com/albums/aa73/hooahguy14/matisyahu-1.jpg
Good luck my friend. I look forward to being your relative.
:help:
Need picture of your cousin, not some Orthodox Jew. (Which Strike couldn't convert to, anyway)
Can I have her if Strike declines, it's really cold I could really use a 19 year old hottie at the mo
Rhyfelwyr
12-01-2010, 14:47
I skim-read the title as saying "I have found a nice Jewish girl", and then the first thing the OP said was "she's my cousin". :sick:
ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88
12-01-2010, 15:43
Is she cute?
Can I have her if Strike declines, it's really cold I could really use a 19 year old hottie at the mo
Down boy, you are old enough to be her father.
I skim-read the title as saying "I have found a nice Jewish girl", and then the first thing the OP said was "she's my cousin".
Those damn Louisiana cajuns.
Strike For The South
12-01-2010, 17:03
I need to know the rules regarding alcohol
I'm willing to give up pork as long as I can fill that void with massive beer consumption
Balls in your court
Veho Nex
12-01-2010, 17:03
Hey I'll dress like that for a cute girl, heck i already have the curly hair and if i ever let my beard grow i think i would be set.
Megas Methuselah
12-01-2010, 22:59
DAMINT I CANT GROW A BERD!!!
Hooahguy
12-01-2010, 23:29
Need picture of your cousin, not some Orthodox Jew. (Which Strike couldn't convert to, anyway)
No pics, sorry, privacy is paramount.
I skim-read the title as saying "I have found a nice Jewish girl", and then the first thing the OP said was "she's my cousin". :sick:
Whats wrong with wanting Strike as a relative?
Is she cute?
If it wasnt considered incestuous to say so, Id say she is.
I need to know the rules regarding alcohol
I'm willing to give up pork as long as I can fill that void with massive beer consumption
Balls in your court
Alcoholism is encouraged as long as you learn Torah all day and dont beat your wife and kids.
DAMINT I CANT GROW A BERD!!!
Beard is optional. :2thumbsup:
Beards are cool.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/images/episode/b00w5g53_640_360.jpg
DAMINT I CANT GROW A BERD!!!
hey, you're the one who had to be a Native American :clown:
jk..jk...
I doubt beards matter.
Hosakawa Tito
12-01-2010, 23:53
I need to know the rules regarding alcohol
I'm willing to give up pork as long as I can fill that void with massive beer consumption
Balls in your court
Gotta be circumsized too, youngblood.
Hooahguy
12-01-2010, 23:56
Gotta be circumsized too, youngblood.
Oh yeah, forgot about that too.
Louis VI the Fat
12-02-2010, 00:09
I can attest Strike is circumsized, I have seen so myse....erm...or so he said so himself one day.
Although one can question if 'Strike jr.' is accurately described by any word containing the word 'size' in it.
Mucho compensation, los muscles grandes. :yes:
Hosakawa Tito
12-02-2010, 00:24
Ahh, but is it a kosher circumcision (http://www.brityy.org/content.asp?dept=1017&article=466) sanctioned by a Rabbi? If not he'll probably have to do it again. shouldn't hurt much...:sweatdrop:
Hooahguy
12-02-2010, 00:57
Well, in cases where the convert is already circumcised, all the rabbi does is prick it.
stratigos vasilios
12-02-2010, 02:35
DAMINT I CANT GROW A BERD!!!
I've had a full beard since I was 15. Surely that's a sign of masculinity?...
Strike For The South
12-02-2010, 03:13
I can attest Strike is circumsized, I have seen so myse....erm...or so he said so himself one day.
Although one can question if 'Strike jr.' is accurately described by any word containing the word 'size' in it.
Mucho compensation, los muscles grandes. :yes:
why do you hide our love?
Well, in cases where the convert is already circumcised, all the rabbi does is prick it.
Well that's alright then, doesn't sound painful at all. :smiley2:
Strike For The South
12-02-2010, 03:29
Well that's alright then, doesn't sound painful at all. :smiley2:
Could be kinda kinky
Hooahguy
12-02-2010, 03:53
Well that's alright then, doesn't sound painful at all. :smiley2:
When I say "prick" I mean he pricks it enough to draw some blood.
Just a heads up. Usually takes about 3 days to heal.
Strike For The South
12-02-2010, 04:04
When I say "prick" I mean he pricks it enough to draw some blood.
Just a heads up. Usually takes about 3 days to heal.
lol
Megas Methuselah
12-02-2010, 05:31
I think I'm circumcised, though. I got some things going for me, eh?
Shaka_Khan
12-02-2010, 08:20
Same here. Plus, I can grow a beard.
Sarmatian
12-02-2010, 09:46
For all I care she could be twins and I wouldn't let a religious authority with a knife near my privates.
Rhyfelwyr
12-02-2010, 12:31
Threads like this make me glad we replaced circumcision with baptism. :sweatdrop:
For all I care she could be twins and I wouldn't let a religious authority with a knife near my privates.
Well, at least you accept the authority part. ~;)
Are we talking arranged marriage here or is there an option for strike to meet her first? If they break up and she blames Strike, who will have to leave the .org?
DAMINT I CANT GROW A BERD!!!
Neither can I, unless the kinda fluff that grows on your belly counts when it grows on cheeks. we are still men. But we still ain't jewish, I don't have curly hair either, blond and blue eyes in fact, major disadvantage they think we have bad character for some reason, racists. I want Hooaguy's cousin but I don't know how
Rhyfelwyr
12-02-2010, 14:08
I cannot grow hardly any hair in the moustache area, for some reason. :shrug:
And when did Husar become a mod?!
Hooahguy
12-02-2010, 16:23
Well, at least you accept the authority part. ~;)
Are we talking arranged marriage here or is there an option for strike to meet her first? If they break up and she blames Strike, who will have to leave the .org?
Yeah, they can meet, very few, if any, arranged marriages in the Jewish community anymore.
Megas Methuselah
12-03-2010, 07:25
Neither can I, unless the kinda fluff that grows on your belly counts when it grows on cheeks. we are still men. But we still ain't jewish, I don't have curly hair either, blond and blue eyes in fact, major disadvantage they think we have bad character for some reason, racists. I want Hooaguy's cousin but I don't know how
Hair dye. Perm. Suntan. Coloured contact lenses. Bodyhair and superglue for the berd. You must hold this disguise until the wedding night. Then you can ditch Hooah's family after that and leave the country, having enjoyed your reward. :yes:
Hooahguy
12-03-2010, 07:36
He can ditch, but I will hunt him down. There will nowhere he can hide. :evil:
Megas Methuselah
12-03-2010, 07:54
Buddy, you really shouldn't prostitute your female family members on a gaming forum. It's unethical.
Buddy, you really shouldn't prostitute your female family members on a gaming forum. It's unethical.
I disagree it's convenient. And let's be honest deep inside we all want a hot 19 year old girl. Heh I said deep
Hooah, hand her over I promise I will only beat her when she's disobeying.
Yoyoma1910
12-04-2010, 04:33
Those damn Louisiana cajuns.
Wow. Thanks for expressing a lovely stereotype.
I'll have you know: A) My wife is French. B) My brother's wife is Hawaiian. C) My sister's baby daddy is Mexican. Also, none of my cousins married or dated each other.
Wow. Thanks for expressing a lovely stereotype.
I'll have you know: A) My wife is French. B) My brother's wife is Hawaiian. C) My sister's baby daddy is Mexican. Also, none of my cousins married or dated each other.
You don't count. You lot aren't true Americans with red, white and blue blood running through you.
Yoyoma1910
12-04-2010, 17:35
You don't count. You lot aren't true Americans with red, white and blue blood running through you.
Buddy, I'm a Cajun. And just 'cause someone probably has no idea what my culture or ethnicity is, doesn't really make me happy for it to be mocked with jokes about incest.
I'm also a corpsman in the U.S. navy, so don't even start the patriotic prattle.
Wow. Thanks for expressing a lovely stereotype.
My apologies.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge fan of cajun culture. I think it's one of the most intriguing and purest traditions of the United States, and that's a positive thing.
Yoyoma1910
12-05-2010, 00:39
My apologies.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a huge fan of Cajun culture. I think it's one of the most intriguing and purest traditions of the United States, and that's a positive thing.
No worries. Just doing my duty to my people. I'm sure you too would have at least said something if someone here had made a similar accusation towards your culture.
...
I also don't really get the whole point of this whole thread, since not all Jewish girls only date Jewish men. I dated a couple. Of course, I can grow a pretty mean beard...
Louis VI the Fat
12-05-2010, 00:41
As coincidence would have it, both populations that have been the subject of this thread - (Ahskenazi) Jews and Cajuns - really do have (had) very high levels of inbreeding, and were formed from small founding populations.
As a result, both groups have high occurences of similar afflictions, notably Tay-Sachs, which is a near exclusive to Ashkenazi Jews and French-speaking North Americans.
No worries. Just doing my duty to my people. I'm sure you too would have at least said something if someone here had made a similar accusation towards your culture.
True, true. Laissez les bons temps rouler.
Yoyoma1910
12-05-2010, 00:55
As coincidence would have it, both populations that have been the subject of this thread - (Ahskenazi) Jews and Cajuns - really do have (had) very high levels of inbreeding, and were formed from small founding populations.
As a result, both groups have high occurences of similar afflictions, notably Tay-Sachs, which is a near exclusive to Ashkenazi Jews and French-speaking North Americans.
Yes well, thanks for the abandonment, continental.
Edit: you also forgot the Amish.
Louis VI the Fat
12-05-2010, 01:06
Abandonement? What abandonment? I, for one, have always tried my utmost to personally enrich the limited genepool of French Americans. :yes:
More seriouslsy, it is all not a matter of being incestuous hicks, but of limited founding populations and subsequent isolation. All Cajuns still are relatives of one another though. It can't be helped.
Yoyoma1910
12-05-2010, 01:12
Abandonement? What abandonment? I, for one, have always tried my utmost to personally enrich the limited genepool of French Americans. :yes:
And I likewise made it a point to re-enrich the depleted Continental French genepool with some old blood.
Edit:
That is true. Which I think is subconsciously or consciously why my siblings and I went outside the local population for our dating patterns.
You should all just go to Québec and have fun over there. I heard Montreal is nice, this time of snow. I mean year.
Reverend Joe
12-05-2010, 04:27
Damnit. My mother is Jewish, I was apparently properly circumcised, I've been to plenty of Seders, I can recite the Chanukah prayers phonetically even when totally ripped, I can read the crap out of whatever anyone puts in front of me, I can rock an epic beard and those freaky Jewish sideburn dreadlocks, and I'll believe any damn thing if there's a hot chick in the deal.
But I can't give up the ham steak. I'll give up bacon, I'll give up sausage, but I'd sooner face damnation than give up fried ham and eggs.
Plus I think Megadeth is better than Metallica. So I'm sure you would hate me forever even if I gave up the ham.
Hooahguy
12-05-2010, 04:50
Plus I think Megadeth is better than Metallica. So I'm sure you would hate me forever even if I gave up the ham.
Nah its cool bro. I would just skip the family reunions.
As coincidence would have it, both populations that have been the subject of this thread - (Ahskenazi) Jews and Cajuns - really do have (had) very high levels of inbreeding, and were formed from small founding populations.
As a result, both groups have high occurences of similar afflictions, notably Tay-Sachs, which is a near exclusive to Ashkenazi Jews and French-speaking North Americans.
It isn't that hard to figure out, a nice jewish girl, and everybody had her
Megas Methuselah
12-05-2010, 16:51
You should all just go to Québec and have fun over there. I heard Montreal is nice, this time of snow. I mean year.
Oh yeah. Better than the USA, anyways. But that's not saying alot...
Nah its cool bro. I would just skip the family reunions.
Lol. I will remember that line, and use it myself sometime.
Buddy, I'm a Cajun. And just 'cause someone probably has no idea what my culture or ethnicity is, doesn't really make me happy for it to be mocked with jokes about incest.
I'm also a corpsman in the U.S. navy, so don't even start the patriotic prattle.
My comment was tongue-in-cheek, making fun of the patriotic prattle. I am not even from the USA.
Also, all blood is red, white and blood anyway. Red blood cells (/w oxygen), White blood cells, the 'blue' red blood cells (/wo oxygen).
Yeah it's true, I was really moved by Shakespear's 'The Merchant of Venice, and guess what when you stab them they really bleed. Poison experiment is pending. Antisemitism is so stupid.
I think I'm circumcised, though. I got some things going for me, eh?
you think?
ok, here is my advice: go to wikipedia. look up the article on the relevent bodypart, and compare. :laugh4:
Threads like this make me glad we replaced circumcision with baptism.
makes me glad we don't have to do either* :clown:
*ok, a lot of Imams will swear by circumcision's prefereability, but really, its not fard. baptism is plain ol' forbidden
Hooahguy
12-06-2010, 02:40
Wait, Muslims dont circumcise?
Wait, Muslims dont circumcise?
we do, but it's not really necessary: it's one of those sunna's everyone wants to follow, especially in Arab countries, even though, as I implied, some Imams describe is as a fard.
as a result, I, my dad, and well...every male in my family so far is circumcised. my dad in particular has similar opinions on uncircumcised people as King Saul did when it looked like he was going to be captured by the philistines: disgraceful (doesn't help his opinion that he it done voluntarily, when he turned ~13). of course, as a Jewish man, I think you are aware of what Saul did when he realized he was going to be captured?
Hooahguy
12-06-2010, 05:31
Yes, of course.
Wait, Muslims dont circumcise?
Yeah they do but with a scimitar. Sometimes it goes wrong and they radicalise
Har har.
EDIT: Mods, Fragony's post warranted no other response. My apologies.
Your lack of humour is disturbing, but then again maybe mine is really terrible
SWAB
gone..
My father wanted me to get circumcised too, but my mother was really, really opposed to that. Before they could come to a proper decision I got meningitis though. Oh well, when I was seven years old, they had to surgically remove some foreskin tissue (although it was so little you can barely see the difference. But don't.)
Rhyfelwyr
12-06-2010, 13:59
Yeah they do but with a scimitar. Sometimes it goes wrong and they radicalise
I lol'd.
Strike For The South
12-06-2010, 17:21
Is this going to start another rash of circumsion threads in the backroom?
Buddy, I'm a Cajun.
Would it be possible to email me some cracklin? I'm sure gmail has the technology. That stuff is heavenly.
Strike For The South
12-06-2010, 17:46
Buddy, I'm a Cajun. And just 'cause someone probably has no idea what my culture or ethnicity is, doesn't really make me happy for it to be mocked with jokes about incest.
I'm also a corpsman in the U.S. navy, so don't even start the patriotic prattle.
Since I am fairly familar with your people May I mock? ~;)
My father wanted me to get circumcised too, but my mother was really, really opposed to that. Before they could come to a proper decision I got meningitis though. Oh well, when I was seven years old, they had to surgically remove some foreskin tissue (although it was so little you can barely see the difference. But don't.)
**** happens. :shrug:
and hey, I could make a tasteless joke about Fragony's politics, but I'm better than that (not by much though :clown:). besides, this is the frontroom.
Megas Methuselah
12-07-2010, 06:48
You know, ever since I signed up in this forum and started the fire, intolerance has generally become more open and acceptable. It's crazy.
You know, ever since I signed up in this forum and started the fire, intolerance has generally become more open and acceptable. It's crazy.
it's life.
we live in the year 2010, but some people still think this is 1850.
Yoyoma1910
12-08-2010, 05:40
Would it be possible to email me some cracklin? I'm sure gmail has the technology. That stuff is heavenly.
No, but I could post a picture of some on here, and we could all lick our computer screens. Of course, then we'd be widow lickers, which is a term one of my boot camp petty officers used to use. "You bunch of window lickers better get your heads out your :daisy:."
Can you kidnap Steve Riley for me?
Yoyoma1910
12-09-2010, 04:27
Can you kidnap Steve Riley for me?
Since apparently according to this thread I'm related to him and his entire band, I'll see what I can do at the next family get together.
Megas Methuselah
12-10-2010, 03:45
Lemur?
Yoyoma1910
12-10-2010, 04:10
Lemur?
No, I'm probably not related to him.
Megas Methuselah
12-10-2010, 04:43
No, I'm probably not related to him.
*throws hands up in surrender*
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm tryina be on your side here, but fine, be that way. Just remember that this isn't your continent, immigrant.
Yoyoma1910
12-10-2010, 05:20
*throws hands up in surrender*
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm tryina be on your side here, but fine, be that way. Just remember that this isn't your continent, immigrant.
Do you have a flag? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTduy7Qkvk8&feature=related)
The only real province of Canada:
http://www.sheppardsoftware.com/images/Canada/factfile/Quebec_flag.png
*throws hands up in surrender*
Whoa, whoa, whoa! I'm tryina be on your side here, but fine, be that way. Just remember that this isn't your continent, immigrant.
Hey it isn't like you guys were doing anything with it, riding pony's building tipi's, you don't need all that much space for yearly summer-camp, soooo selfish
Shaka_Khan
12-16-2010, 08:31
Hey it isn't like you guys were doing anything with it, riding pony's building tipi's, you don't need all that much space for yearly summer-camp, soooo selfish
Some nations in North America needed space for buffaloes while some others needed space for plantation. They needed more space than you think.
I don't know about the deep interior of Canada. I think there's plenty of space for everyone over there.
Maybe foreigners could create dikes to get extra land for themselves instead of claiming that they bought land for a ridiculously cheap price.......
Hey wasn't being serious t'is teh frontroom. It's about hooah's cousin. I want her.
All that matters is stripe, triangle or gom?? Cup-size??? So many questions
Why would you want her, Fragony?
If I remember correctly, aren't you a good looking, businessman, who is loaded with cash, why would you be interested in random girl who you haven't seen, when you have the girls of Holland at your beck and call?
Hooahguy
12-16-2010, 19:47
Cup-size???
Looks like a C, or on the larger size of B.
Strike For The South
12-16-2010, 20:00
Looks like a C, or on the larger size of B.
lol
Why would you want her, Fragony?
If I remember correctly, aren't you a good looking, businessman, who is loaded with cash, why would you be interested in random girl who you haven't seen, when you have the girls of Holland at your beck and call?
loaded with cash I wish
loaded with cash I wish
I was going to question about something, but it might compromise your RL identity, so I won't. But from what you have posted, I believe you also own authentic African relics, such as ritual axes, which are worth around ten thousand or so each, don't you? (which you posted on the forum before), you also have your own yatch, etc
That boat is a floating asthma-attack it's not as spectacular as it sounds, African weapons yes they are worth quite a lot but I'm not going to sell them
Yoyoma1910
12-17-2010, 19:06
Looks like a C, or on the larger size of B.
Are you checking out your cousin's mammary glands, in an effort to help pawn her off on some guy(s) from a gaming website?
Reverend Joe
12-18-2010, 03:17
Looks like a C, or on the larger size of B.
You - you actually -
Woooooooow.
Crazed Rabbit
12-18-2010, 20:51
You - you actually -
Woooooooow.
This is my response.
Also - really? Really?
Seeing her cupsize? That's so difficult? Now if my triangle/stripe/gom inquiry would be granted it would creepy. Still don't care it's still love only different and I want her.
Hooahguy
12-19-2010, 19:10
You - you actually -
Woooooooow.
This is my response.
Also - really? Really?
Ok let me explain. I didnt know she was a cousin, checked her out, then realized who it was. I know, shame, shame on me. :embarassed::embarassed::embarassed:
Louis VI the Fat
12-20-2010, 00:04
I'm afraid you shall now have to gouge your eyes out with a rusty spoon, lest you incur the wrath of your God upon your family for seven generations. :book:
The Stranger
12-20-2010, 02:28
Why would you want her, Fragony?
If I remember correctly, aren't you a good looking, businessman, who is loaded with cash, why would you be interested in random girl who you haven't seen, when you have the girls of Holland at your beck and call?
lmao XD
edyzmedieval
12-21-2010, 00:27
Great thread.
And a damn good way to kick off the Christmas season...
Crazed Rabbit
12-21-2010, 03:08
Ok let me explain. She was turned to the side with her head turned away. I didnt recognize her, checked her out, then realized who it was. I know, shame, shame on me. :embarassed::embarassed::embarassed:
It's not just that - it's that YOU THEN POSTED IT ON THE INTERNET. When you make such a mistake you do NOT then make it EXPONENTIALLY WORSE.
CR
Hooahguy
12-21-2010, 05:30
It's not just that - it's that YOU THEN POSTED IT ON THE INTERNET. When you make such a mistake you do NOT then make it EXPONENTIALLY WORSE.
CR
Hey man, he asked.
Bros before hoes.
Crazed Rabbit
12-21-2010, 05:43
I thought it couldn't get worse.
CR
Hooahguy
12-21-2010, 05:49
Hey, if I get the chance to have Strike as a relative, by god I will take it.
pevergreen
12-21-2010, 07:19
Hey, if I get the chance to have Strike as a relative, by god I will take it.
Really?
Seriously?
Hey, slightly off topic, but have you taken any recent head trauma?
Hooahguy
12-21-2010, 07:23
I did have a minor concussion a month ago, give or take a week or so....
Why?
All that matters is stripe, triangle or gom?? Cup-size??? So many questions
:laugh4:
Hooah! You actually answered. :laugh4:
:laugh4:
Hooah! You actually answered. :laugh4:
Much to my surprise as well :laugh:
edyzmedieval
12-23-2010, 00:42
Much to my surprise as well :laugh:
Complaining? ~;)
Shaka_Khan
12-23-2010, 07:57
Hey wasn't being serious t'is teh frontroom. It's about hooah's cousin. I want her.
All that matters is stripe, triangle or gom?? Cup-size??? So many questions
Same here.
Hooah, how long are her legs?
Hooahguy
12-23-2010, 21:07
Same here.
Hooah, how long are her legs?
Ok, that I dont know.
Strike For The South
12-23-2010, 22:07
2 things;
How many internets did I just win?
I didn't ask her cup size, I'm not a pervert....I asked for her NUMBER ~;)
Hooahguy
12-24-2010, 00:45
2 things;
I didn't ask her cup size, I'm not a pervert....I asked for her NUMBER ~;)
I wasnt telling you. I was telling Frag.
Hooahguy
12-24-2010, 00:46
2 things;
I didn't ask her cup size, I'm not a pervert....I asked for her NUMBER ~;)
I wasnt telling you. I was telling Frag.
Strike For The South
12-24-2010, 00:48
I have compititon now?
I see how it is
I wouldn't call it competition
Yoyoma1910
12-31-2010, 11:10
Hey man, he asked.
Bros before hoes.
Hooah, not only are you pimping out your cousin, and checking out your cousin, but you are also referring to her as a "ho."
Just an observation.
Hooah, not only are you pimping out your cousin, and checking out your cousin, but you are also referring to her as a "ho."
Just an observation.
It are just boobs I can tell the cupsize of my mom (D), she's no hoe though just kinda slutty, poxy minx
Hooahguy
12-31-2010, 14:30
and checking out your cousin, .
Oh come on that was an accident.
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