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View Full Version : In this thread, things that really rustle your jimmies.



a completely inoffensive name
01-03-2013, 07:25
Anyone else hate when you get in the fast lane on the highway and this asshole is going 1227 attoparsecs per microfortnight?

Takes a lot to make ACIN mad, but going under 1400 apc/microfortnight in the fast lane really gets to me.

Fragony
01-03-2013, 08:35
We Dutch tend to drive the Germans mad taking the fast lane, there are no speed limits on German highways, they jokingly call the NL numberplates 'nur linksch' (always on the left)

Sigurd
01-03-2013, 09:26
How many firkins pr. fortnights would that be?

a completely inoffensive name
01-03-2013, 09:58
How many firkins pr. fortnights would that be?

Silly Sigurd, a Firkin is a unit of volume, attoparsecs/microfortnight is a velocity not a volumetric flow rate.

Sigurd
01-03-2013, 11:26
Silly Sigurd, a Firkin is a unit of volume
And also a unit of silliness. :sneaky:

TinCow
01-03-2013, 15:38
Slow drivers should be executed.

Andres
01-03-2013, 16:06
Slow drivers should be executed.

As should people flashing their headlights and not keeping a safe distance because I refuse to go over the maximum speed limit.

Just let me finish my maneuver of getting past the slower guy on the other lane and I'll move away from the fast lane straight away; no need to be an ass trying to force me to go over the speed limit, because you can't wait to get yourself killed by driving way too fast.

Beisdes, it doesn't work since that kind of behaviour always impresses me so much that I suddenly start to go much slower...

TinCow
01-03-2013, 16:30
People who drive more than 10 mph (16 kph) under the speed limit should be executed, regardless of what lane they are in. People who drive exactly the speed limit should be executed if they are sitting in the fast lane. People who tailgate should be executed regardless of the circumstances.

Andres
01-03-2013, 16:46
People who drive more than 10 mph (16 kph) under the speed limit should be executed, regardless of what lane they are in.

Depends on the weather circumstances and the amount of traffic.

Sometimes I'm happy that it's possible to drive half the speed limit...


People who drive exactly the speed limit should be executed if they are sitting in the fast lane.

You aren't supposed to go faster than the speed limit, you reckless, irresponsible wannabe F1 race pilot :stare: Then there's also the fact that in the dictatorial regime of Belgium there's a speed camera every 50 meters or so.


People who tailgate should be executed regardless of the circumstances.

No, they should be forced to eat their car while I'm watching. Another good solution would be allowing me to wreck their car with a big sledgehammer while they are watching on their knees.

People overtaking on the right (or on the left for those countries where they drive on the left side), should also be forced to eat their cars.

drone
01-03-2013, 16:59
People who drive the same speed as the car next to them in the slower lane should be beheaded and then tortured.

TinCow
01-03-2013, 17:09
Depends on the weather circumstances and the amount of traffic.

Sometimes I'm happy that it's possible to drive half the speed limit...

Clearly inclement weather can alter the rules of the road.


You aren't supposed to go faster than the speed limit, you reckless, irresponsible wannabe F1 race pilot :stare:

There are a lot of things that I do that I'm not supposed to. I drive safely at a reasonable rate of speed. The speed at which I drive is perfectly legal in many US states and many other countries. The fact that my state speed limits were created by goddamn fascistic imbeciles does not make my driving inherently reckless. In any case, I accept full responsibility for my decision to ignore stupid laws when I find it prudent. I have never once protested any speeding ticket I have been given; I choose to speed and therefore I accept responsibility for the consequences when I am pulled over. That doesn't make the speed limits around here any less moronically puritanical though.


People overtaking on the right (or on the left for those countries where they drive on the left side), should also be forced to eat their cars.

Not if the car being overtaken has been given the opportunity to move to the correct lane and has declined to do so. It is not necessary to sit behind an inconsiderate driver for several minutes simply because they have parked themselves in the overtaking lane and refuse to move.

Also, it is my personal opinion that all automobiles should have two separate horn sounds. One should be a polite 'notice' horn to alert people to something in a considerate manner. The other should be a raging demon horn that tells people to go have sexual congress with their own selves.

Andres
01-03-2013, 17:22
There are a lot of things that I do that I'm not supposed to. I drive safely at a reasonable rate of speed. The speed at which I drive is perfectly legal in many US states and many other countries. The fact that my state speed limits were created by goddamn fascistic imbeciles does not make my driving inherently reckless. In any case, I accept full responsibility for my decision to ignore stupid laws when I find it prudent. I have never once protested any speeding ticket I have been given; I choose to speed and therefore I accept responsibility for the consequences when I am pulled over. That doesn't make the speed limits around here any less moronically puritanical though.

Clearly, the fines in your country aren't high enough. Perhaps the fines should be 50 % of your wealth or your salary :stare:

We have highways with traffic lights on them :wall:



Not if the car being overtaken has been given the opportunity to move to the correct lane and has declined to do so. It is not necessary to sit behind an inconsiderate driver for several minutes simply because they have parked themselves in the overtaking lane and refuse to move.

Clearly, unreasonable behaviour of other drivers can alter the rules of the road.


Also, it is my personal opinion that all automobiles should have two separate horn sounds. One should be a polite 'notice' horn to alert people to something in a considerate manner. The other should be a raging demon horn that tells people to go have sexual congress with their own selves.

Perhaps you should hang up a punching bag in your car?

TinCow
01-03-2013, 17:32
We have highways with traffic lights on them :wall:

This automatically disqualifies you from any conversation about highway etiquette. (Though I will concede my country is almost as stupid for putting traffic lights on roundabouts.)


Perhaps you should hang up a punching bag in your car?

Physical violence is entirely inappropriate. I am perfectly content to express my distaste for my fellow human beings with verbiage and gesticulation alone.

Hax
01-03-2013, 17:45
Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

drone
01-03-2013, 18:08
From this thread, I'm guessing TinCow commutes on I-66. My condolences.

caravel
01-03-2013, 18:15
People who drive the same speed as the car next to them in the slower lane should be beheaded and then tortured.
You mean tortured then beheaded...

I'm not a driver, too old to learn and far too reckless and dangerous to be allowed behind a wheel.

Nothing annoys me more than reading threads consisting of whinging drivers complaining about traffic and other drivers.

You are the traffic.

~;p

TinCow
01-03-2013, 18:15
From this thread, I'm guessing TinCow commutes on I-66. My condolences.

Yes, I do. Fortunately it's only twice a week since I started working at home. The most infuriating thing is that even with some of the worst traffic in the entire country, it's still faster for me to drive than to take Metro. I live within walking distance of the Vienna station, but it takes me 75 minutes door to door to get to and from work. Driving takes me about 45 minutes to an hour on a normal day, so it's actively faster for me to drive than to take public transportation.

drone
01-03-2013, 20:10
You mean tortured then beheaded...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g09GtnWdBjc
~D


The most infuriating thing is that even with some of the worst traffic in the entire country, it's still faster for me to drive than to take Metro. I live within walking distance of the Vienna station, but it takes me 75 minutes door to door to get to and from work. Driving takes me about 45 minutes to an hour on a normal day, so it's actively faster for me to drive than to take public transportation.
Metro's uselessness never ceases to amaze me. 20 years behind the area's growth, and it still shuts down too early. :no:

the tokai
01-04-2013, 13:22
Clearly, the fines in your country aren't high enough. Perhaps the fines should be 50 % of your wealth or your salary :stare:

We have highways with traffic lights on them :wall:
Try visiting Egypt, they have highways with speedbumps. No speedlimits though.


Perhaps you should hang up a punching bag in your car?
Is that what you call your wife?

HopAlongBunny
01-04-2013, 13:39
After driving commercially for 15 years "speed demons" really bug me. The fact is the difference in transit times between speeding and doing the limit are so small as to be meaningless. All you "accomplish" is meager self-satisfaction and a false sense of beating time. Save the aggro for something that warrants it; relax and enjoy the drive :p

Ibrahim
01-05-2013, 03:42
the fact that I'm the only one in my class without a job....

Tuuvi
01-05-2013, 11:19
Customers that come up to me and ask if we have any Levi's 550 size 33x35 in light stonewash, and then get annoyed when I don't know right away. There's at least 600 pairs of jeans in my store, do they think I'm a freakin' computer?

Beskar
01-05-2013, 18:17
Customers that come up to me and ask if we have any Levi's 550 size 33x35 in light stonewash, and then get annoyed when I don't know right away. There's at least 600 pairs of jeans in my store, do they think I'm a freakin' computer?

Don't work some where like Walmart though, the stupidity gets higher (this was 10 years ago, but I think still would be the same).

Would be on the aisle next to the Milk, and customers ask "Where is the Milk?", and strangely, no matter whatever aisle I was on, I seemed to have receive this question. The thing is, there is a massive sign overhanging saying Milk which can be read anywhere in the store, and you would have to actively walk past a front-facing fridge of Milk to go down onto the aisle I would be working on (if it was the cereal aisle).

The thing is, it isn't simply "asking" as some sort of genuine question, it is sheer incompetence. It is not a case where I could politely just 'say' where it is "It is on the next Aisle, madam", or even point out the huge overhanging sign, or even the floor markings with braille. Any attempt to simply point them in the right direction is met with an expression that you just landed down from the planet Zorgrock and I am a blue alien with tentacles whipping about me. I had to physically almost hold their hand and show them. Obviously, there is no thank you or "silly of me, hehe", it was "grunt" then just stormed down the aisle all the while having to do a dung-eating grin.

---

One of the things which really rustles my jimmies as it were is when it comes to food. It always annoys me when some one cuts away the best part of the meal to discard it, and you are there eyeing it up on their plate, wishing you had it instead and it wasn't wasted on that person who doesn't appreciate the good things. Or they actually takes a nice part of the meal then give it to the dog, then they complain the dog isn't eating their dog-food. Or those people that start giving you lectures because you eat the skin from a chicken drumstick (instead of peeling and discarding it), even though it is covered in herbs and flavourings, making it one of the most delicious parts.

Tellos Athenaios
01-05-2013, 19:04
Then there's also the fact that in the dictatorial regime of Belgium there's a speed camera every 50 meters or so.

Well none of those actually work. You're more likely to see shooting stars. ~;)

Additionally, if by extreme misfortune one of them does work and catches you just claim the "but the cops are Walloon and therefore must have made a mistake with the camera defence"

Crazed Rabbit
01-06-2013, 06:11
When I become Dictator of the Universe Tincow shall be appointed my Czar of Traffic and have a fleet of laser-death-ray-equipped satellites with which to keep traffic moving smoothly.


The fact is the difference in transit times between speeding and doing the limit are so small as to be meaningless. All you "accomplish" is meager self-satisfaction and a false sense of beating time. Save the aggro for something that warrants it; relax and enjoy the drive :p

Going 5-10 mph faster can shorten my commute by 33%.

CR

Ironside
01-06-2013, 09:40
When I become Dictator of the Universe Tincow shall be appointed my Czar of Traffic and have a fleet of laser-death-ray-equipped satellites with which to keep traffic moving smoothly.

Going 5-10 mph faster can shorten my commute by 33%.

CR

So you are massivly speeding in residential areas? Legal speeds has to be 10-20 mph for that to be true.

Now, highway speeding does start to give notable time gains if you drive for 2+ hours in a row.