View Full Version : Communist invasion of new York
Ok, I did Atlanta. Ate grits. Now I'm going to be in nyc for a weekend. Any tips? I like walking around and soaking up the atmosphere.
a completely inoffensive name
01-30-2014, 20:42
Tip 1: Dont call yourself a communist in public.
HoreTore
01-30-2014, 20:52
Remember to tell every italian street toughs you see that you think his sister is attractive. Use of slang is preferable. I hear they really love that stuff.
EDIT: Oh, and don't wear the ribbon if you don't feel like it. It's optional.
Ok, I did Atlanta. Ate grits. Now I'm going to be in nyc for a weekend. Any tips? I like walking around and soaking up the atmosphere.
Get inside the Central Park once your lungs start rejecting the toxic vapor that passes for air elsewhere in the city. Central Park is an oasis in that desert.
Seamus Fermanagh
01-30-2014, 22:18
NYC is a big city with all that that entails.
Some of the best pubs in the USA, Broadway shows, Statue of Liberty, all of the odd/intriguing venues down in Greenwich village, history stuff scattered from the battery to Harlem, The Apollo theater....and all of that without leaving Manhattan (except for the ferry trip to liberty).
Montmorency
01-31-2014, 00:05
Get inside the Central Park once your lungs start rejecting the toxic vapor that passes for air elsewhere in the city.
What.
Peter Luger Steakhouse, you want it red, you got it
Tip 1: Dont call yourself a communist in public.
You Yankees love it.
You Yankees love it.
The new mayor of NYC certainly does.
Montmorency
01-31-2014, 14:59
The new mayor of NYC certainly does.
:rolleyes:
Anyway, NYC air is much better than whatever you breath in Chicago or whatever Midwestern village you're based in.
The Lurker Below
01-31-2014, 15:53
:rolleyes:
Anyway, NYC air is much better than whatever you breath in Chicago or whatever Midwestern village you're based in.
No you can't dispute the freshness of Chicago air. It constantly refreshes at the brisk rate of 50 mph straight off the great lake.
I don't know much about NYC, Idaho, but it seems to me as long as you badmouth Chicago pizza and Boston Red Sox baseball, you will fit right in.
When I went to Atlanta I went to a gun range, hired a machine gun and spent an entertaining hour shooting holes in a person shaped picture. But it turns out that in pinko fag new York I am not allowed to do the same. Outrageous infringement of my civil rights.
a completely inoffensive name
02-01-2014, 02:08
When I went to Atlanta I went to a gun range, hired a machine gun and spent an entertaining hour shooting holes in a person shaped picture. But it turns out that in pinko fag new York I am not allowed to do the same. Outrageous infringement of my civil rights.
Now that you have gotten a taste of freedom, the UK prob wont let you back.
The main obstacle to getting in and out of the US is your dreadful immigration authorities. Richest country in the world and you have a system that is high in box ticking bureaucracy and time wasting and low on actually getting people out the airport and on with there lives.
Sarmatian
02-02-2014, 10:35
The new mayor of NYC certainly does.
Isn't that the guy who uses knife and fork to eat pizza? Any opinion he has is thus automatically rendered invalid. Stupid barbarian.
Gregoshi
02-02-2014, 11:25
The main obstacle to getting in and out of the US is your dreadful immigration authorities. Richest country in the world and you have a system that is high in box ticking bureaucracy and time wasting and low on actually getting people out the airport and on with there lives.
A self-proclaim communist comes to the US to learn how the shoot a machine gun. Don't know why they'd put you in the "slow" line. ~:pat:
They put *everyone* in the slow lane. And then ask a bunch of pointless questions which don't in any way expose my commie gun toting self.
If the system was slow but methodical and meaningful, that would be fine. But it's slow and pointless.
I had a good discussion about state healthcare with some Americans. I think I converted them to our evil pinko ways.
Fisherking
02-18-2014, 11:05
Sounds typical. US government bureaucracy = slow and pointless.
They put *everyone* in the slow lane.
You should be comforted by the knowledge that the TSA people hate everyone equally.
Seamus Fermanagh
02-19-2014, 23:15
They put *everyone* in the slow lane. And then ask a bunch of pointless questions which don't in any way expose my commie gun toting self.
If the system was slow but methodical and meaningful, that would be fine. But it's slow and pointless.
I had a good discussion about state healthcare with some Americans. I think I converted them to our evil pinko ways.
Jobs for many who are now of job age. [Bastardizing a line from Clockwork Orange]
Gregoshi
02-19-2014, 23:49
There is a fast lane actually for "pre-check" passengers. I got in that line last time we flew, though my wife had to go in the slow line. I must have gotten in it via the random factor (you can sign up for it apparently) - there was something extra printed on my boarding pass. It was great. No one was in the line and I didn't have to remove my shoes or belt or take my laptop out of the bag. In and out like the wind. Then I had to wait on the other side for my wife.
TSA pre-check (http://www.tsa.gov/tsa-precheck/what-tsa-precheck)
Fisherking
02-21-2014, 14:42
There is a fast lane actually for "pre-check" passengers. I got in that line last time we flew, though my wife had to go in the slow line. I must have gotten in it via the random factor (you can sign up for it apparently) - there was something extra printed on my boarding pass. It was great. No one was in the line and I didn't have to remove my shoes or belt or take my laptop out of the bag. In and out like the wind. Then I had to wait on the other side for my wife.
TSA pre-check (http://www.tsa.gov/tsa-precheck/what-tsa-precheck)
Their chip reader showed your implant is working perfectly.
:laugh4:
Seamus Fermanagh
02-21-2014, 17:41
There is a fast lane actually for "pre-check" passengers. I got in that line last time we flew, though my wife had to go in the slow line. I must have gotten in it via the random factor (you can sign up for it apparently) - there was something extra printed on my boarding pass. It was great. No one was in the line and I didn't have to remove my shoes or belt or take my laptop out of the bag. In and out like the wind. Then I had to wait on the other side for my wife.
TSA pre-check (http://www.tsa.gov/tsa-precheck/what-tsa-precheck)
....and just how many "spouse points" did you lose for this exercise?
Gregoshi
02-22-2014, 01:08
Their chip reader showed your implant is working perfectly.
:laugh4:
That's surprising for a government product.
....and just how many "spouse points" did you lose for this exercise?
:laugh4:
Fortunately none. She didn't look happy when she finally got through but that was directed more towards the annoyance of the experience.
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