My funniest moment yet...

[keet]

In my current campaign I have just hit the year 1230 and got the message that the Golden Horde have appeared to conquer the land and none are safe from this new threat.

Well on the next turn the khan led a small army into a nearby rebel province and was defeated and then the message read the leader of the khans has been killed in battle and he has no heirs and his faction has disolved and poses no real threat.

That was so funny, one turn he is here to conquer the world and the next yearhe is wiped of the earth.

That was a true classic in comedy there. http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif

[Cazbol]

The "strategy" of the Mongols does seem to simulate severe intoxication on the Khan's part. Tiny armies sent against uneven odds. Thousands and thousands sent into badly defended provinces, leaving formerly conquered provinces to revolt big time, etc. In the end the rebels tend to be the main enemy of the Mongols and the faction that kills the most of them, but I've never heard of such an easy victory as you describe. And now the forces of the horde have been assimilated into the rebel forces. Resistance is never futile.

[max_killer_payne]

Ive got quite a funny moment....So im at war with just about everyone, and the italians think they can lead a crusade against me. The crusade is made up of mainly elites, chilivrac knights, etc. I've got 1 crossbowmen unit and 2 feudal knights, so about 360 men, they've got 2500 men. Just for the fun of it I command it personnally, the enemys general unit, charged and the general was cut down by a volley of crossbowmen, so I send my knights into battle and before they reach any units to attack the enemy are in full flight, pegging it back home

[Foreign Devil]

I've seen something similar to this- in one battle against the Papacy, I had a unit of mounted crossbowmen. I moved them out in front of my main force to harass. Much to my surprise, the entire enemy army turned around and marched (thats right, marched) off the field after my mounted crossbowmen killed 6 or 7 royal knights from the general's unit.

[einar]

Quote[/b] (Foreign_Devil @ Jan. 30 2003,11:44)]I've seen something similar to this- in one battle against the Papacy, I had a unit of mounted crossbowmen. I moved them out in front of my main force to harass. Much to my surprise, the entire enemy army turned around and marched (thats right, marched) off the field after my mounted crossbowmen killed 6 or 7 royal knights from the general's unit.
Maybe, the dread level of your general is very high...

[econ21]

My funniest moment was when as HRE, I was foolishly trying to pursue my Glorious Achievements and recreate the Holy Roman Empire by occupying Rome. This was partly because the Pope was bugging the heck out of me, by siding with French aggressors against me.

I sent in an army to occupy Rome, but unbeknownest to me, the Scilians had a massed an army and decided to intervene on the Pope's behalf. My army was short on spear infantry - this was pre-patch, where spears ruled, and seemed doomed against two allies of equal or greater strength. I did have three catapults, however, high up a hill and ordered them to autofire. One early volley lobbed a rock which landed on the Pope himself.

I don't know why I found this so amusing - I have nothing againts the Papacy in the real world - but the incident did make the subsequent defeat quite bearable.

In the course of my many frustrating dealings with the Pope in MTW, it is a feat I have often wanted to relive, but sadly have never attained.

[Coldstream]

Quote[/b] (Simon Appleton @ Jan. 30 2003,12:23)]One early volley lobbed a rock which landed on the Pope himself.
LOL.

I get funny mental pictures of pope john paul in his pope-mobile getting crushed by a boulder.

[Foreign Devil]

Quote[/b] (einar @ Jan. 30 2003,12:07)]
Quote[/b] (Foreign_Devil @ Jan. 30 2003,11:44)]I've seen something similar to this- in one battle against the Papacy, I had a unit of mounted crossbowmen. I moved them out in front of my main force to harass. Much to my surprise, the entire enemy army turned around and marched (thats right, marched) off the field after my mounted crossbowmen killed 6 or 7 royal knights from the general's unit.
Maybe, the dread level of your general is very high...
I don't think it was. I did kill a large chunk of the Pope's unit, maybe he had very low morale. What was so interesting is that they marched off the field, never once did they run.

[A.Saturnus]

Had a single fanatic, just one man. I send him to invade Sardinia, just to get rid of him. But he won

[max_killer_payne]

Coldstream I also get mental picutes of the carnage I can just imagine a glorious general in flashing, golden army get knocked of his horse by a boulder, very funny A.Saturnus Did your fanatic face any resistance, if he did how the hell did he manage to conquer it alone??

[Herodotus]

I once chased the Egyptians (with thousands of men and a decent General) off the field with a unit of Peasants. I was Spanish and granted I had a good army with a 9 star general, but I only sent out my peasants to scout in the dust storm, they must have thought it was a clever trap so they ran for there lives.

[el_slapper]

In my current camp(as the Danes playing cautiously), British & french did fight. Normal. But, after 1 1/2 century of battles, england was all blue & france all red...

[The Last Emperor]

The pasture is always greener on the other side i guess http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif

[cugel]

My funniest moment was when I was playing as the Sicilians (playtesting my Mod and pretty much minding my own business) and the Egyptians attacked and conquered most of the map -- it was rather funny seeing the Egyptian invasion of Ireland But the funniest bit was -- Egypt lost control of Tyrolia and next turn there was a huge "muslim loyalist rebellion" in Tyrolia http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif I had to laugh outloud about that. Just think of all those Tyrolian "muslim loyalists" wearing lederhosen, suspenders, and those alpine hats I can just see them yodeling calls to the faithful to come to the mosque http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif

[desdichado]

Quote[/b] (Foreign_Devil @ Jan. 31 2003,18:00)]
Quote[/b] (einar @ Jan. 30 2003,12:07)]
Quote[/b] (Foreign_Devil @ Jan. 30 2003,11:44)]I've seen something similar to this- in one battle against the Papacy, I had a unit of mounted crossbowmen. I moved them out in front of my main force to harass. Much to my surprise, the entire enemy army turned around and marched (thats right, marched) off the field after my mounted crossbowmen killed 6 or 7 royal knights from the general's unit.
Maybe, the dread level of your general is very high...
I don't think it was. I did kill a large chunk of the Pope's unit, maybe he had very low morale. What was so interesting is that they marched off the field, never once did they run.
I've seen this too. Attacking Saxony (from Denmark so bridge attack) with my favourite 6 star general with a equal force (in numbers) to AI. He had some order foot to my feudal seargants so superior quality troops led by a decent 4 or 5 star general.

I started the attack with a unit of fedual sarges and he marched his order foot - they fought in middle of bridge and wiped each other out. As soon as I moved my generals unit the entire AI army turned around and marched away with a unit of cav acting as rearguard. Thinking it was a trap I stopped my generals unit. AI stopped and formed up. I started my generals unit marching again and AI kept marching in good order off the field.

Thing is I don't think I could have won the battle so happy that I won but surprised to say the least. I know my generals unit was a bunch of hardnuts (previous battle against a 9 star Spanish king, completely surrounded, rest of army routing they fought on and beat 5 units singlehandedly) but still strange behaviour I thought
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/confused.gif

[The One Wraith]

GREETINGS
I thought I'd throw mine in here......
I haven't played much, as the game is pretty new in my collection, but here it is:

My SECOND funniest moment was when, after MANY consecutive battles with the HRE, they were battered and surrounded by me, the French(who took the English EASILY), the Danes, and the Polish. I was allied with all except Danes.
I decide I'll attack the turn after next, and click the button. Civil war breaks out in what's left of the HRE
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif
....then the French throw a crusade at me....
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/pissed.gif

My FUNNIEST moment (again with the HRE):
It was their last stand; the King's army versus my legions of Kats, Allagions, Cav, and Varangians (plus some siege).
Anyway, I assemble my army to crush them, while softening them up with siege engines. Unbeknownst to me, the first rock the crew loaded in the catapult was the "Great General Seeking Rock of Doom" (Yes, FIVE exclamation marks).
It smashes the king and the entire army -like in the previous post- MARCHES off the field.
This is how my expression progressed:
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/cool.gif
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/shock.gif
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/confused.gif
http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/joker.gif

[MiniKiller]

My funniest moment would have to be well I have no funny moment, cept on time I accidently sent all my men inot one province (the ppl of novogord's) and they sent all their men into mine, we just swaped, lol then i crushed them becasue they were now inbetween my italain battle field.

[Kensai Achilles]

my funniest moments in MTW depend on how often major dump posts his not funny jokes http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/smile.gif (usually are funny) and krast too, Agun-Gah

[Sir Moody]

My funniest moment occured when trying to get rid of a rubish heir (Great fighter but rubish general and he was next in line) so i threw him at a 600 man force made up of mainly spear and an enemy king

10 mins later 400 enemy are dead (including the enemy king) or captured to only 3 Royal knights lost

while not faltering in my reserve again i threw him against a 1000 man force led by the new king (200 peasnats rest urban mal's) again 20 mins later after some grueling fighting the enmy king is dead - all the peasants are dead - a good majority of the urban mil's have been trodden on at the cost of all the royal knights except the prince and my soon to be king has skilled risky attacker perk as well as skilled attacker and enough stars to be of worth - i was killing myself laughing

[el_slapper]

With such an attacker, you have to be sure to attack an enemy with him the year the heirs come mature That must mean 2-4 more stars for the heir.....