That dirty son of a gun!

[Al Qasim Hussein]

So I don't need any more alliances w/ my neighbors on my current Danish campaign, and the first King (Olaf II, dead now for forty five years, god rest his soul) was a randy gentleman who had about 10 kids, 7 of whom were daughters. I had one aged crone still puttin' around, no other monarch was really interested in her (she was twice their age), and she was soon to hit the useless and dreaded 35 year mark.

In the interest of protecting her from the wiles of the nunnery, I married her to a 7 acumen general managing one of my wealthiest provinces (the one north of lithuania, whatever that is). He had low loyalty (4?) and this bumped it up a considerable bit. Two years later...he has secret adultery I really wonder if the programmers put something like this in their for my amusement, or if this was totally random. I mean, yes the adultery is secret...BUT ITS MY DAUGHTER HE'S SLEEPING AROUND ON ITS NOT A SECRET TO ME, YOU *******

Just thought I'd share that amusing tidbit.

[son of spam]

hehe, that's a pretty funny coincidence.... you should have him executed http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

EDIT: on second thought, give him some slack. After all, he's married to a 35+ year old crone http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/tongue.gif

[Ranges]

Indeed. Drag a high valor spy onto the bastard. He deserves it.. *girns*

[Oaty]

Now do you know where term son of a gun comes from


Well occasionally captains of a ship would bring woman(whores) aboard to boost the mens morale. Well the gun deck is where all the births were given on a combatant ship. The ships log kept records all events. So when a birth was put in the log and the father was'nt known they put in that a son of a gun was born at such n such time

[Hetman_Koronny]

*bows*

Interesting insight, oaty...

@Al Qasim Hussein:

If you like to role play your king, you should have him killed somehow. Suicide battle?

http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wave.gif

*bows*

[katank]

I'd suggest tying him to the barrel of an organ gun and firing it personally.

however, since it's early, just use catapults.

charge him into hordes of enemy and then target the enemy unit closest to him with catapults.

shots will most likely kill him.

or, walk him through firing archers many times.

nothing like an arrow in the throat to teach him a lesson http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[solypsist]

hey it's a secret so you technically can't do anything.

wait until it gets revealed, then you can continue with your punishment

[katank]

that's crazy talk.

you can't reveal your own general's V&V's any more.

I say you pretend to and "accidentally" try him for treason.

I still like my death by artillery idea.

nothing like the satisfaction of shoot at the enemy through this traitor and getting him into a fine mist spread over the battlefield.

BTW, you might not want to waste the rest of his unit.

I suggest you merge the men in his unit into others.

they didn't do anything wrong. It's their leader and their leader alone that must be punished

[Kaiser of Arabia]

Send a high valour assassin after him. Kill him and his whore at the same time...
Revenge is Sweet...

[katank]

actually, an inquisitor would perhaps be better.

him having adultery wouldn't help his piety rating and inquisitors are better than assasins for catholics.

found the devil within his heart. muhahahaha I love that wodd crackling sound. http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif

[Al Qasim Hussein]

Well someone, somehow (not thru my doing) revealed his adultery, because its not secret anymore But I'm in a bit of a quandry.

You see, this particular Lord is sporting whatever the maximum fast talker trait is, and he has eight acumen Some darn fool idjit is also sending inquisitors after him (again, not me...I think its the Polish but I'm at work so I can't check) which keeps raising his piety. This guy, in other words, is a governing MACHINE.

I'm a practical king. And I also love my daughter. But I'm going to have to side w/ this lecherous so-and-so on this one. I can't afford to lose him, as I'm the Danish, and trade is the word in my empire

[katank]

practicality rules.

keep him by all means.

I would imagine making him gov of sweden would be better though as sweden should be richer.

how's his other stats?

I'd say forget about your daughter. As long as he's loyal and doesn't become a civil war risk.

[solypsist]

maybe he's cheating on his real wife with your daughter (the other wife.)

[katank]

that's quite true as he wouldn't dare to reject the king's daughter by saying he had one already http://www.totalwar.org/forum/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif

[Axeknight]

Quote[/b] (solypsist @ May 07 2004,22:37)]maybe he's cheating on his real wife with your daughter (the other wife.)
Ooh, it's like a royal soap opera. When does the long-lost brother arrive?