The Ethics of renting a midget? [Archive]

Strike For The South

12-29-2005, 20:13

http://www.rentamidget.com/

These guys are for real if any of you live in California you can rent a midget for 100$ to preform shenanigans and tomfoolery!!!

Devastatin Dave

12-29-2005, 20:25

I see no difference in this as to renting a clown for a kid's birthday. The price is a bit steep though, I wonder if they have 1/2 off days. You know, save a LITTLE because every LITTLE bit helps. Oh well, I'm a little SHORT on time, gotta head down the yellow brick road. Later, keep it on the down LOW...:tongueg:

Just A Girl

12-29-2005, 21:59

You cant seriously leave all that in Devistating Dave lol....
could be considered Kind of a lil hurtfull to some.

as for the topic
i dont see much of a problem with it though, there choice.

Byzantine Prince

12-29-2005, 22:19

This is even more funny than that rent a German thread. I wonder if I could rent ah-dut. :annoyedg:

Ja'chyra

12-29-2005, 23:19

Devastatin Dave

12-29-2005, 23:46

I'd better be careful... I'm only 5 foot 4. I wonder if I can get rented as an angry midget, or as I prefer, an angry little person.:gring:

Taffy_is_a_Taff

12-30-2005, 00:16

Dave, I'll rent you. Do you do magic tricks too?

Slyspy

12-30-2005, 01:08

I'd rent a midget so long as he stayed in a little cage and I could poke him with a stick every now and then. A midget in a cage would make a great pub sign: Welcome to The Angry Dwarf! Warm beer and cold food served daily. Don't mind the lil fella swearing at you in the car park.

Seriously, if they want to hire themselves out for entertainment purposes then fair play and good luck to them.

Alexanderofmacedon

12-30-2005, 02:37

It's fine if they are willing to do it. There may be good money in that, which they couldn't get elsewhere. With little midget families, you might need a lot of money to support your family...

I may rent a midget, just to chill though...

Devastatin Dave

12-30-2005, 05:03

Dave, I'll rent you. Do you do magic tricks too?
I can make large amounts of beer disappear.:gring:

Taffy_is_a_Taff

12-30-2005, 05:13

say we filled a tub with beer.
say we then submerged you in it.
could you then drink the displaced beer?

I'm offering you a chance to drink your own volume in beer, reckon you could?

I'll let you play with cards, top hats, rabbits and doves too.

Major Robert Dump

12-30-2005, 06:06

I'm offended by this thread as my grandfather was half midget.

Redleg

12-30-2005, 06:12

I'm offended by this thread as my grandfather was half midget.

Does that make you an 1/8th of a midget, or just a quarter of one. :gring:

Strike For The South

12-30-2005, 06:16

I'm offended by this thread as my grandfather was half midget.

he could of made some seroius dough:tongueg:

Major Robert Dump

12-30-2005, 06:23

Unfortunately, I'm only 1/8th midget, which is not enough to entitle me to any of the midget money available in the Federal Midget Fund established as a reperation for midget discrimination. I can, however, shop at the midget commissary on the midget reservation but theres not much there I can use because all they sell are the little cans of vegetables, mini-candy bars and pants that are so small it hurts my testicles to wear them.

I hate my grandpa for not marrying a midget!

Samurai Waki

12-30-2005, 09:03

Perhaps you could gain citizenship to the midget country, like people who have 1/8 or 1/16th Jewish Blood can gain citizenship into Isreal...whats the name of that country again? I think it was the Shire!

Weebeast

12-30-2005, 09:08

Actually Hobbits aren't really considered as "midgets." The dwarves are the midget ones.

Samurai Waki

12-30-2005, 10:40

Actually Hobbits aren't really considered as "midgets." The dwarves are the midget ones.

Meh. A midget is a midget in my book, if he has a preference, he can cross the span of a fantasy book and live in Hyboria with the Cimmerians for all I care.

Taffy_is_a_Taff

12-30-2005, 15:48

Weebeast:
aren't midgets just normally proportioned people who happen to be very small whereas dwarves have disproportionately shaped limbs that result in their short stature?
If so then surely hobbits would be more like midgets.

Samurai Waki

12-30-2005, 22:45

Weebeast

12-31-2005, 00:19

Idaho

12-31-2005, 00:21

Dave, I'll rent you. Do you do magic tricks too?
Yeah he foams at the mouth and bites strangers when certain keywords are used "Clinton" etc... :winkg:

Samurai Waki

12-31-2005, 00:47

Hobbits are disproportioned. They got huge feet. If hobbits were the "midget" ones Peter Jackson wouldn't make Gimli fall of the horse, unable to jump at Helm's Deep and become potrayed as the "unusual" man.

Are you suggesting that real midgets can't have big feet? or real Dwarves can't ride a horse? for shame.

Meneldil

12-31-2005, 21:02

Forbidden in France since 1995. Once again, we'll be leading Humanity by promoting the complete ban of midgets-renting.

Devastatin Dave

01-01-2006, 00:10

Forbidden in France since 1995. Once again, we'll be leading Humanity by promoting the complete ban of midgets-renting.
What about midget tossing? Sometimes too much humanity spoils all the fun.:juggle2: :laugh4:

Kaiser of Arabia

01-01-2006, 08:36

I'd better be careful... I'm only 5 foot 4. I wonder if I can get rented as an angry midget, or as I prefer, an angry little person.:gring:
I'm taller than you!

Wow. That's weird. You're so much more feirce than me too. Weird.

GoreBag

01-01-2006, 10:50

Does that make you an 1/8th of a midget, or just a quarter of one. :gring:

Or...1/16th...

The math behind this is mind-boggling.

Kralizec

01-02-2006, 12:17

This is an awesome idea, I'm going to whore myself off for money too!

With my 1.84 metres, I'll surely be the largest midget in the whole world!!!

Geoffrey S

01-02-2006, 16:51

Best topic title ever.

Germaanse Strijder? I don't think you're a midget.

ah_dut

01-02-2006, 20:22

This is even more funny than that rent a German thread. I wonder if I could rent ah-dut. :annoyedg:
what!?

Scurvy

01-03-2006, 10:03

Germaanse Strijder? I don't think you're a midget.

im pretty sure if he chops of his legs he will be, can you be an artificial midget? ie. through injury or otherwise become a midget...

also if i did "become" a midget would i be able to claim my federal midget fund money, and how much?

Devastatin Dave

01-03-2006, 21:34

I'm taller than you!

Wow. That's weird. You're so much more feirce than me too. Weird.

Don't worry, I'm twice your age. By the time you're 31 you should be one very grumpy, maybe not as grumpy. When you're my hieght, you tend to get screwed with to a point that you become a true bastard!!! how tall are you, maybe we can calculate your feirceness in ratio to your hieght and age at 31.:idea2:

Mongoose

01-03-2006, 23:55

I wonder, is there a market for midgets who have gigantism?

Big_John

01-04-2006, 01:26

shorter people are always the fiercer (e.g. napoleon). staring at other people's crotches all day plays with one's emotions.

Devastatin Dave

01-04-2006, 02:48

shorter people are always the fiercer (e.g. napoleon). staring at other people's crotches all day plays with one's emotions.
Actually that's one of the benefits of being vertically challenged.:laugh4:

Seamus Fermanagh

01-04-2006, 05:15

Please note:

Any rental requests for the "diminutive" services of DevDave or Ah Dut should be referred to the undersigned, who has agreed, unilaterally, to act as their agent.

Drunken revelry events are acceptable, but both rentees charge triple fees for enacting the Cupid role from 10-16 February.

While the management notes that both rentees have comparatively big feet, this agent can neither confirm nor deny the relevance of the "old wive's tale" relating thereunto.

Please have the courtesy to book at least two weeks in advance. Thank you.

Devastatin Dave

01-04-2006, 19:32

Oh I have a half off deal this week. You get to throw breakfast cereal at my while I say in a bad Irish accent, "Do you want my lucky Charms". The kids and certain perverted elements in society love it!!!

Goofball

01-05-2006, 01:30

I'd better be careful... I'm only 5 foot 4.

Oh baby!

I can't believe you just gave up that little tidbit.

Now I just have to think of a good way to use it...

:inquisitive:

bmolsson

01-05-2006, 03:07

Why would anyone want to rent a midget ?? Escort service I can understand, but a midget ??? :huh:

Seamus Fermanagh

01-05-2006, 06:12

Can you say "two-for-one" sale?

Or how about the person who wants an entourage for the evening but doesn't have space in the car for 5-6 vertically advantaged types?

Please remember that while our diminutive duo are available for escort work, any side contracts between yourself are NOT covered in the escort fee and are NOT the responsibility of myself as their self-apponted agent. Our service neither condones nor acknowledges any other activities.

Taffy_is_a_Taff

01-06-2006, 04:26

I was told that I should team up with a midget.
I'd dress up as a clown and we'd be paid to go to parties and tell offensive jokes, fall about and generally be obnoxious and annoy people. Maybe even indulge in a little random intimidation.

P.S. somebody really suggested that. I don't know who'd hire us though.

Scurvy

01-06-2006, 16:06

P.S. somebody really suggested that. I don't know who'd hire us though.

I would :dizzy2: some light entertainment is always welcome --> for a short time anyway, wouldnt want to stretch it...