EB news - Sunday, February 19

[khelvan]

Greetings Europa Barbarorum fans!

Six weeks ago we asked for your assistance in finding bugs in our modification. Your feedback has been invaluable, and we have been busy working on fixing as much as we can. A patch is near at hand, and this message will include version notes to let you know what we have been doing for the past weeks.

We know many of you are playing and enjoying the mod even though it is a beta and not a release version, but unfortunately this patch will require you to re-start your campaigns. In addition, because we packed many of our textures, models, and other work to be more efficient in terms of speed, we are currently not in a position to make fixes to unit models and textures at this time. This will most likely be included in the next full version release, currently with no time estimate.

While we have been fixing bugs, we have also been working to incorporate new things where possible. Epistolary Richard has added new custom tiles pulled from things which CA left behind, but never used. Here are some examples of things you will see in version 0.7.3 of EB.

Note that all these appear both on the campaign map as well as custom battles.

https://img132.imageshack.us/img132/1320/aeduistandard3uo.th.jpg (https://img132.imageshack.us/my.php?image=aeduistandard3uo.jpg)
An Aedui warband on the march through the wintry lands of Britain.

https://img205.imageshack.us/img205/5685/aeduivcassestones8yt.th.jpg (https://img205.imageshack.us/my.php?image=aeduivcassestones8yt.jpg)
An Aedui chieftain calls for his men as he is surrounded by the Casse defending their holy site of Cairncalladrydan.

https://img141.imageshack.us/img141/2469/colossusfromsea0sc.th.jpg (https://img141.imageshack.us/my.php?image=colossusfromsea0sc.jpg)
The Colossus of Rhodes from the sea, the small men at the base of the trees are the actual units in battle!

https://img141.imageshack.us/img141/307/karthvptoltomb3hm.th.jpg (https://img141.imageshack.us/my.php?image=karthvptoltomb3hm.jpg)
Ethiopian troops owing loyalty to the Ptolemies defend Abu Simbel.


https://img106.imageshack.us/img106/4407/pahlavavseleukidgardens1bm.th.jpg (https://img106.imageshack.us/my.php?image=pahlavavseleukidgardens1bm.jpg)
The Seleukids make their stand in the shadow of the Hanging Gardens.

The Pyramids in EB:
https://img138.imageshack.us/img138/2443/romanipyramids5ef.th.jpg (https://img138.imageshack.us/my.php?image=romanipyramids5ef.jpg)

https://img113.imageshack.us/img113/4052/romanipyramids23lt.th.jpg (https://img113.imageshack.us/my.php?image=romanipyramids23lt.jpg)

https://img138.imageshack.us/img138/8050/romanipyramids35ln.th.jpg (https://img138.imageshack.us/my.php?image=romanipyramids35ln.jpg)


Release notes, v0.7.3b:


Changes from v0.7.2b

Bug fixes

Traits and Ancillaries
---------
- Fixed Desertwarrior trait
- fix for Carthage captures Syrakousai message (should have been Allied Greek Cities)
- added age cut-off for Scholarly trait (no more geezers becoming schoolboys)
- fix to prevent intelligent generals from getting checked for RomanHero and Brave twice
- Games Hater shouldn't get Gladiator ancillary; acquiring Gladiator will make it more likely to become a fan of the games
- Censor won't fine or censure himself for not being married or for living luxuriously
- Issue fixed where Censor would never lose his office
- fixed minor bug that would cause Primary Trait aggregate trait to display incorrect information
- fixed bug where son of Triumphator wouldn't get epithet
- fixed CTD issue for everybody who wins at the Olympics, set competitor as antitrait so it will go away
- fixed issue where admiral could not acquire CoronaRostrata
- fixed issue with wrong settlement names in Germany, for Sweboz Uniter trait
- fixes and refinements for Hellenic offices
- Fixed an issue where religion won't work as intended



Units and Buildings
-------------------
- fixed beginning placement of some buildings so that text/name would display properly
- Removed unique buildings from Skythia and Mikra_Skythia, they were showing up as Lake Avernus and Wintry Dodone.
- various fixes for unit recruitment issues, including:
-iberian velites recruitable everywhere for iberians and carthies, removed
-added turdulia line to iberian velites recruitment
-added sacred band infantry recruitment line for Zeugitana for Carthage
-added recruitment line for Dalmatia for illyrian units
-added recruitment line for KH and Mak units in Illyria_Hellenike
-added MIC 1&2 units to KH and Mak recruitment in Sardika
-removed galatian kluddolon recruitment from Scorcouw)
-added bactrian agema recruitment in Baktra, removed recruitment in Alexandreia
-added nomandherd and nomadsett recruitment
-added bataroas recruitment to Nervaea Belgae, Bellovacaea Belgae, Vindelicos, Volcallra, and Lugonesis for the Gallic factions
-limited belgae unit recruitment to Nervaea Belgae and Bellovacaea Belgae
-removed Casse, Aedui, and Arverni recruitment for belgae units under Govt 1)
-added Roman recruitment for several regional units
-removed botroas recruitment for Volcallra and Lugonesis
-removed gaeroas recruitment from Volcallra & Lugonesis
-removed clyddabre recruitment for Aedui and Arverni factions)
-added rorarii, accensi, and iphkratides hoplites to Roman recruitment in Syracuse
-added many Roman units (identical to Etruria) to Roman recruitment in Segesta
-corrected brihentin recruitment
-added Gallic units to Roman recruitment in Venetia & Aemilia
-added evocatae, antesignani and praetorian cavalry to Roman recruitment in Venetia & Aemilia
-added reformata & imperatoria cohort recruitment to Roman type 2 govts
-corrected an error in the "yeuzhi" noble name for nomad recruitment
-corrected "roman archer auxillia" recruitment
-limited praetorian cohort recruitment to Latium2 (Roma)
-commented out the building bonuses for nomadherd and nomadsett
-corrected azad asavaran, dehbad asabara, zradha shivatir, and zradhapahlavans recruitment for Pahlava
-removed unnecessary requirements from nomad buildings
-fixed late lybian spearman recruitment for Carthage
-corrected soldurii recruitment for Gallic factions
-corrected median cavalry recruitment area (identical to median javelin cavalry), and limited their recruitment to MIC3 and up
-corrected pahlavashivatir recruitment area, added parthia, and limited their recruitment to MIC2 and up
-removed Roman early equites recruitment for MIC 2
-corrected hetairoi recruitment problems (cultures swaped/lines missing)
-corrected hypaspistai recruitment problems (cultures swaped/missing line)
-corrected pheraspidai recruitment problems (cultures swaped/lines missing)
-corrected agemata (bactrian, basilikon, kleruchoi) recruitment problems
-corrected chaeonian guard recruitment problems
-corrected galatian kleruchoi recruitment problems
-corrected galatian kuarothori recruitment problems
-corrected thorakitai argyraspidai recruitment problems
-added calawre, rycalawre, and "barb chariot heavy briton" to Casse recruitment in Cassemorg)
-removed sotaroas reruitment for all provinces for Gallic factions, left recruitment for provinces in gaul and briton
-added "merc samnite spearmen" and "merc samnite heavy infantry" to recruitment in Apulia, Kalabria, and Campania for all factions
-fixed bad faction entries for several elephant recruitment lines
-added "elephant indian armored" to MIC4 recrutiment, removed Delta_Neilou from "elephant indian armored" recruitmet
-added "greek hippeis thessalikoi" recruitment for Makedonia for Maks and to Thessalia for KH
-removed duplicate brihentin recruitment line for Vindelicos
-removed superfluous lugoae recruitment for Gallic factions & Casse
-removed superfluous sphendonetai recruitment lines for Parthians & Sarmatians
-removed superfluous toxotai recruitment lines for Sarmatians & Yeuzhi
-removed libyphoenician (early & late) recruitment for all faction except carthage, augmented recruitment area for carthage
-removed chariot recruitment in egypt for casse & gallic factions
-fixed velites recruitment, now recruitable in all roman type 1 provinces (i.e. italy)
-removed herd requirement from High King Court recruitment for Sauromatae
-removed "roxolani lancers" recruitment from MIC 4 & 5 for Pahlava, replaced it in Shahrdar Camp recruitment
-removed "steppe cavalry scythianhorsearchers" recruitment from MICs for Sauromatae and Pahlava, replaced in nomad Camps
-added "chaeonian guard" recruitment to Illyria_Hellenike for Epeiros
-removed brihentin recruitment for several factions, changed govt requirements for all non-Gallic factions
-corrected carnute cingetos recruitment for Aedui
-corrected arverni arjos recruitment for Arverni
-removed gaesatae recruitment from briton
-limited mori gaesum recruitment for all factions to Helvetis

Scripting
---------
- Apocalypse 246 fixed
- Parthian horse discounts fixed
- Baktrian, Ptolemaioi VC display CTD fixed
- Sucum-Murgi VC display problem fixed
- SettlementName condition for Roma, Swebotráustástámnoz, Ambrakia, Bin-kath, Arsé, Syrakousai, Rhodos corrected
- changes to have Triumphs trigger properly
- kill off Ptolemaioi DOA spies at the start
- add buildings to correct problems with ownership and displaying incorrectly
- corrected Antiocheiaeia_Margiane => Antiocheia_Margiane, Rhodes => Rhodos, Kashgar => Sulek, Cenobum => Cenabum, Sardica => Sardika, Angl => Karkathiokerta, Yerushalaim => Hierosolyma
- settlement name issues (should use settlement tag for everything except SettlementName condition), removed quotes from around names
- Fixed campaign script precursortype2 placement issue


General
-------
- various text edits to clean up display text throughout the mod
- fixed messages where it would say "You have been attacked by an army of Rome" when fighting Seleukids, etc.
- added pahlava and ptolemaioi eliminated images to prevent errors when those factions are destroyed
- created getai, eleutheroi defeat images by copying already existing ones to prevent errors when those factions are destroyed (temporary fix)
- swapped seleucid and julii strat map banners for FOW-shrouded settlements


Gameplay tweaks

Traits and Ancillaries
---------------
- tweak to Roman Patrician acquisition
- tweaked Restless Sleeper
- tweaked diplomats to make them cost more to bribe and provide bribery defense for cities
- increased bribe resistance for Loyal generals
- tweaked Bored trait
- raised fertility for Casse so births not impossible
- toned down CasseArgas and CasseBren bonuses to reduce likelihood of "uber-Barae"
- added some 'primary' traits for agents (smart, energetic, charismatic)
- Barcid/anti-Barcid for Carthage tied into adulthood of Hamilcar Barca/conquest of certain settlements
- new faction leader trait for Ptolemaioi
- new traits for Ptolemaioi
- clean-up of BattlePoints triggers, added an additional BattlePoint for large battles (makes them count a bit more for command star acquisition -- difference equivalent to differences between level of victory, not enough to overcome easy vs. even battle difference)
- tweaks and new triggers to randomize aging a bit for new generals and agents
- Made Gregarious and BlackBileHumour antitraits
- Removed almost all vanilla epithets to prevent overwriting of new epithets
- Halved chances for many ancillaries, due to 4 turns per year
- added traits for Celtic Infantry and Cavalry generals, edited triggers to obtain traits
- Note to describe Sweboz general 'adopted' into the faction's leadership
- Trait Type4Governor for spawned generals to garrison settlements with Type4 government buildings, Interloper trait for other generals who occupy settlement to cause unrest
- Disabled "Likes Easy Battles" trait
- General in settlement with Type1 government building makes it harder to bribe, better at catching spies/assassins
- Generals bribed from other factions are less likely to produce offspring eligible for a position of power and authority (hard to trust a traitor)
- new triggers to make it more likely to get healthy wife depending on husband's handsomeness/influence and health of the city
- modified/added some building requirements for a few ancillaries
- removed immediate negative effects of ForcedMarching trait. Can still domino into other traits, though.
- added trait ForcedMarchingExpert for generals who acquire certain traits or ancillaries, blocks off ForcedMarching effects
- added trait Wealthy for generals who acquire great personal wealth, various effects on other traits
- Pahlav not restricted from campaigning in winter
- Roman Patricians more fertile in beginning of the game (first 50 years)
- added triumphs over Dacia, Syria, and Parthia
- triggers added to acquire Nomad/Settled traits for steppe factions, depending on settlement buildings, activity
- made Lenient, Brutal, Warmonger, and Supervisor irreversible once level 1 reached (threshold 10)
- consolidated sickly/healthy/intelligent/ignorant wife traits
- New traits representing training for agents (diplomats, spies, assassins)
- trait for firstborn son of faction leader - +1 Influence
- removed bottom 2 levels of Diplomat's age trait, renamed top two levels and rewrote descriptions
- spies and assassins can train in a settlement with a market or better, depending on natural ability/intelligence
- diplomats can train in a settlement with an academy or better
- Bored now takes city size, city happiness into account
- increased chance to win Olympics
- changes to have Triumphs trigger properly
- renamed theatron and odeion buildings
- renamed 3 ancillary priests to match temple names (Getai and Iberia)
- reworked Makedonian Hypermethyskos trait so it incorporates the vanilla Drink trait
- made BadFarmer and BaktrianHydreiasTechnities antitraits
- adjusted LogisticalSkill trait to remove morale bonus, since that is now incorporated into the WellSupplied/PoorlySupplied traits
- agent can get lazy and lose his good energy when sitting around in a town doing nothing
- added more triggers for Spymaster so that not every faction leader will be able to get it (now tied to Intelligence)
- adjusted priest ancillaries and "Worships X" traits to match buildings, adjusted/added some effects
- changed ancillary portraits
- Lalos (Talker) and Secretive antitraits
- Aesthetic antitrait to Miserly
- turned StrategicSkill back on
- added message for Carthaginian general conquering Syrakousai
- Slothful general won't get Bored, general under siege won't get Ennui
- new priest ancillaries
- new worshipper traits
- edited description of Magian Tutor ancillary to explain Mirror of Princes and Circle of Justice
- removed SpyMaster epithet from spies (couldn't make it go away when they left town)
- removed all trailing spaces
- civil disturbances at random when taxes high and loyalty very low, to spice things up a bit and make it less predictable
- new Epeirote ethnicities done by Equilibrium
- general who greatly outnumbers opponent becomes known as a strategist
- general who enslaves or exterminates allied eleutheroi cities gets bad reputation (negative Influence penalty)
- more triggers to tie buildings to general's traits (general in settlement with Roman villa has chance to become Wealthy, general without tavern may sober up, general with palaistra may get healthy, etc.)
- various campaign start trait/ancillary tweaks


Units and Buildings
-------------------
- renamed theatron and odeion buildings
- changed theatre complex
- changed multipurpose complex
- various campaign start tweaks
- tweaks to temples
- various tweaks to unit stats and balance
- new animation set
- new sprites for some units


Scripting
---------
- wait times changed from 1 and 0.5 to 0.2 to speed up script during AI turns
- Removed quoted settlement names from create_building and other console_commands (should use settlement tag)
- tweaked AI assistance
- Diplomats killed off for AI factions
- renamed theatron and odeion buildings to comply with complex limit, changes suggested by Teleklos
- changed script-generated precursors for every faction except Getai and Makedonia
- Added precursors for macedon and dacia
- Added Jerusalem temple


General
-------
- various starting unit & agent placement and number tweaks, beginning diplomacy tweaks
- activated "beta" culture-specific GUIs, news ones added but unable to be displayed until next full version release
- put historical tyrant Hiero in charge of Syrakousai (replaced Alexandros), complete with traits and biography (added his name to possible names for slaves)
- replaced some vanilla quotes with EB quotes
- Fixed "died of the plague" bug where it replaced born year, various other incorrect text, by adding an entry for slave victory.
- edits to command star descriptions
- changed "Summer" to "Spring, Summer, or Fall" for season tooltip clarity
- culled campaign_descriptions.txt to assist load time
- tweaked loading screens
- new rebel banners and captain/general banners for many factions
- made forests denser on the battle map
- tweaked strat map models
- various map tweaks
- new custom locations, including new custom tiles
- renamed Tripolitania => Syrthim, Prophtasia => Prophthasia, and Cannae => Canusium in all relevant files


Please note that unless stated otherwise, ALL pictures shown in our news posts are of works in progress. We continue to improve on all parts of EB, and even things found in the open beta and in the upcoming patch are considered "beta."

As always, if you have questions or comments, the best place to post them would be here:

https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/forumdisplay.php?f=70

Or here:

http://www.twcenter.net/forums/index.php?showforum=60

We give special thanks to http://www.imageshack.us who provide us with a simple, foolproof, and free way to show you all these pictures each week.

Have a wonderful day!

Sincerely,

-the EB team

[blacksnail]

Spectacular. I can't wait to fight at the base of the Colossus!

[Cheexsta]

Woohoo! Almost here, then? :2thumbsup:

[LestaT]

Will the EB animation pack compatible or it is included in the patch ?

[khelvan]

The patch has all of our latest animations.

[The_White_Knight]

Adorable! Can't wait! :2thumbsup:

[=E.T=]

Patch is ready?

any link for download???

if not yet, when?????

tnx!

;)

[SpawnOfEbil]

I shall love the fixed recruitment areas. Playing as the Sauromatae, it gets really annoying when you can't recruit basic horse/foot archers. However, I shall miss the 0 upkeep archers :no:

[Cybvep]

Sounds great. I have one question, though.


(...)tweaked AI assistance(...)
What do you really mean by that? Less money for AI?

[Steppe Merc]

I shall love the fixed recruitment areas. Playing as the Sauromatae, it gets really annoying when you can't recruit basic horse/foot archers. However, I shall miss the 0 upkeep archers :no:
Just a hint, I would wait to play Sarmatians and Parthians until the recruitment is fixed in the patch.

[Wardo]

"WE WANT PATCH! WE WANT PATCH! WE WANT PATCH!"

An angry mob surrounds the EB headquarters, bricks, rocks and fireworks blast through the windows, TA is hit in the head and dies instantly, splattering blood all over his office. QwertyMIDX cries like a little baby on the corner of the room, sucking his thumb, with peed pants.

Ranika knows a revolution when he sees one, and he knows the situation is about to get out of control. "We need to put an end to this crisis, if we cannot give them what they want, we must at least distract them long enough to give us time to evacuate through the hidden emergency tunnel." - sentenced Ranika.

Khelvan, the Supreme fearless God of EB, knew what he had to do - "I'm the captain of this boat, and I'm sinking with it. You must all go now, I'll delay the barbarians". But he knew he didn't had the patch, it was all a lie, but even if he had it, what would happen if he caved in to the demands of the savage mob? Give them a finger and they'll rip off your arm, what would they demand next? A port to 1.5 in less than 3 days?

So he thought of something else, Khelvan bravely marched through the narrow corridors of the EB Mansion, ducking from time to time to avoid the pointy, sharp rocks that flew all around zooming through the windows. He approached the balcony and heard the loud angry cries from below.

"DEATH TO EB!" - the vandals shouted while burning EB flags.

Khelvan sneaked to the balcony, took a deep breathe, and rose as a valiant, brave knight.

"Fans of EB! Hear me!" - announced Khelvan.

The crowd suddenly froze, there was absolute silence, except for the sound of the burning flags, and some random screams from EB members who were hit by harmfull objects. But it was silent enough. And then, the crowd finally realized it was Khelvan, their God, and they bursted in joy.

"Khelvan! Khelvan! I love you! Marry me!" - said one of the protesters.

"My loyal worshippers, you gave your blood, your gold and your life for me. For that I am grateful. Without you, EB wouldn't be possible. I have promised a Patch, and I will give you a Patch."

The mob cheered.

"And now I present you, the PATCH!" - And then Khelvan took this (http://www.stickergiant.com/Merchant2/imgs/125/pb8817_125.gif) out of his pocket and lifted it high in the air.

"Ooooooh! It can't be! He came out of the closet!" - said one of the mobsters.

Flames sparkled in the eyes of every protester, they have been fooled, by Khelvan, their God was a fraud. Before Khelvan knew it a throwing dagger hit him in the crotch - "Yeouch!" - he cried.

Then he heard someone scream - "That's what you get for modeling naked fanatics without Tiger-pattern thongs!".

He looked down at his crotch in severe pain and noticed something had been chopped off.

"Don't worry Khelvan, that's what you always wanted, now your sex change surgery will be cheaper" - said Ranika, offering his hand to Khelvan, who was now kneeling at the floor in pain - "Come now, it's time for us to leave".

And since then, nobody heard anything from Khelvan, EB or the Patch ever again.

[SpawnOfEbil]

That story brings a tear to the eye ~:mecry:

[Masy]

Oh, the humanity. Khelvan's manhood being lopped off was the master touch.

[Urnamma]

Why is Khelvan gay, and why is it poor old Qwerty who has to cry and pee his pants? Qwerty will have you attacked by the guards of the historical revolution, you'd better watch your:2thumbsup: step!

[Big_John]

Why is Khelvan gaysome say nature, others say nurture.


a tiny few say it's the sweet seduction known as big john...

[We all need someone]

That was a pretty funny story, but let's hope we aren't shattering khelvan's self-esteem.

And it's still not as funny as the Gummy Bear poem somewhere on this forum. Under "Numidia replace the Yeuzhi" or something.

[Steppe Merc]

While it's a great song, not sure how well that name will go over with some of the people on this forum...

[fallen851]

So after this new patch, is the plan to port to 1.5 or do another patch for 1.2?

Thanks.

[Reenk Roink]

some say nature, others say nurture.

a tiny few say it's the sweet seduction known as big john...

:laugh3:

[Teleklos Archelaou]

There will be a full repacking for a new release in 1.2 for sure - since we want to get all the new units and graphics corrections in. But we'll start trying to port to 1.5 in the meantime also.

[Masy]

God Bless EB

[Moros]

While it's a great song, not sure how well that name will go over with some of the people on this forum...
sounds like the teddy bear picnic song from frank zappa and captain beefheart.

[khelvan]

What self-esteem? :inquisitive:

[We all need someone]

figures it would be the big Z and the Captain.

And hey, if people can't handle thinly veiled, dirty songs from the Stones, then they can go crowbar that stick out of their ass.


The tin teardrop, bulbous also tapered.

[VandalCarthage]

"DEATH TO EB!" - the vandals shouted while burning EB flags.

Huh? :furious3:

[booker]

Sounds great. I have one question, though.


What do you really mean by that? Less money for AI?

Yes i really want to know this... what type of tweaks?

[Steppe Merc]

And hey, if people can't handle thinly veiled, dirty songs from the Stones, then they can go crowbar that stick out of their ass.
Hey, I love the Stones, you'll get no arguments from me. Just some friendly advice.

[Wikingus]

Those screens are SWEET! :dizzy2:
I cannot wait to battle it out under those glorious monuments. Excellent! :2thumbsup:

[soibean]

sorry if this was cleared up or answered already but I didnt see it in the notes for the patch but...
Did you fix the AI's ability to mass produce units even though they are in huge debt? i.e. Im fighting the Aedui, I take over 4 of their towns, but they can still form 3/4 full armies to march against me AND send more armies to rebel towns to expand their empire, meanwhile every town is earning -5000 and less.

Have you fixed the auxillary recruitment in Greece? I was psyched to have conquered Athens, Sparta, and Corinth, only to find that even with a level 2 government and a level 3 barracks I could recruit 1 roman unit after the marian reform.

Good work on all the updates though, sorry to whine as well, Im very excited to play the newer version.

[Teleklos Archelaou]

There are lots of recruitment fixes. But there will still be more fixes needed. It's not a final release or anything. But it will definitely be better in regards to unit recruitment. Just keep helping us out in these things. :grin:

[Cheexsta]

What self-esteem? :inquisitive:
Aww, somebody needs a hug...

Hehe, in all seriousness, I dunno about anyone else but I really can't wait for the patch. Sounds like it will fix quite a few of the bugs in a great mod ~;)

[soibean]

There are lots of recruitment fixes. But there will still be more fixes needed. It's not a final release or anything. But it will definitely be better in regards to unit recruitment. Just keep helping us out in these things. :grin:

sweet
one of the greatest things about this mod, imho, is the recruitment system and government system that you have in place
I love it

Has anything been done to cut down on rebels popping up? Im in 245 BC in my roman campaign. All of italy is under my control, 1/2 of Greece, and 2/3 of Gaul, but Im still getting random groups emerging within Italy, each town has atleast 130% loyalty, that have 3 or more gaesatae units in them... not a good time.

[Iskandr]

I am really looking forward to the patch, it's hard to play some of the factions that can't recruit most of their troop types :furious3: I'd also like to see the AI lend-lease slowed down at least a little, or at least at the beginning of the game. Maybe the AI should get money based on the player's income, or maybe they shouldn't get any the first 20 years, or something like that.

Anyway, it seems most of the basic cocepts are wither working or fixable, it'll be great to see the finished product. I just hope it gets done before MTW2 comes out, I'm easily distracted (oooh, blood! Aztecs! NAPTHA THROWERS!).

Iskandr

[Teleklos Archelaou]

sweet
one of the greatest things about this mod, imho, is the recruitment system and government system that you have in place
I love it

Has anything been done to cut down on rebels popping up? Im in 245 BC in my roman campaign. All of italy is under my control, 1/2 of Greece, and 2/3 of Gaul, but Im still getting random groups emerging within Italy, each town has atleast 130% loyalty, that have 3 or more gaesatae units in them... not a good time.
It's gotta be the difficulty level. I test run some factions in M/M and I don't get many rebels at all (if ever) once the initial ones are put down.

[LordElrond]

Sounds great! I am eager to try out this patched version of EB when it comes out. I hear that it is much more stable than the earlier build, and thats a huge plus for the game. Thanks for all the hard work that went into this patch, and the entire mod.

LE

[soibean]

It's gotta be the difficulty level. I test run some factions in M/M and I don't get many rebels at all (if ever) once the initial ones are put down.

I play on h/h, I havent played vh/vh yet because I wasnt sure how balanced it was. Also, some of the factions were missing units so I didnt want to have a huge advantage over them and think myself godlike in my EB abilities.

[john289]

In a future patch or the full release I'd like to see some more work done on the Sweboz. Particularly more traits that apply to them such as racial traits(well not exactly racial, but something similiar to what the Aedui have, Belgae, Galla, ect.) and some more few things like that for them.

But even more, I would appreciate if recruitment was fixed for all factions.

EDIT: Just noticed that recruitment will be fixed, sorry:(

[Malrubius]

In a future patch or the full release I'd like to see some more work done on the Sweboz. Particularly more traits that apply to them such as racial traits(well not exactly racial, but something similiar to what the Aedui have, Belgae, Galla, ect.) and some more few things like that for them.


I'd like to see that, too, but it would take someone with the historical knowledge to write them up and decide what traits the ethnicities should influence. We're a bit short-handed on the Sweboz at the moment. :no:

However, they have a lot more traits and ancillaries than Hayasdan or Qarthadastim.

[PSYCHO V]

... and hopefully the next build won't be far off and we'll finally get all that extra artwork, units etc included. :shame:

[Seamus Fermanagh]

Quote:
"DEATH TO EB!" - the vandals shouted while burning EB flags.


Huh?

Fear not, EB responded by editing out the Vandal's entire faction.

NEVER mess with the guys & gals who decide which cultures will show up for the party.

[jerby]

... and hopefully the next build won't be far off and we'll finally get all that extra artwork, units etc included. :shame:
~;) shouldn't you be writing the gaesatae description? I vaguely remember some sort of pun against you..never really got what teh deal was with.

"gaesatae liked to fight naked, that we know. teh rest si up to Psycho <skip>"
tough it was damn funny to read...

[Krusader]

~;) shouldn't you be writing the gaesatae description? I vaguely remember some sort of pun against you..never really got what teh deal was with.

"gaesatae liked to fight naked, that we know. teh rest si up to Psycho <skip>"
tough it was damn funny to read...

There is a description written already for them, but it just didn't get through the maze that's called the 'EB Bureaucracy'.



The Gaesatae (Guy-sah-tay; Spearmen) are easily one of the most fearsome groups of warriors in the known world. They fight stripped bare but for neck torcs and sometimes their shoes or boots. They fight with longswords, but are named for their incredible skill with javelins; they can hurl them unnaturally long distances and deal great damage with them. Their charge is most ferocious though, causing many lines to simply fold and flee. This is not all solely due to skill and strength, though they are experienced and huge, muscular men. They imbibe a chemical before battle making them seemingly impervious to pain. They will fight to the very end, and are very destructive when employed properly.

Historically, the Gaesatae were Gallic 'naked fanatic' mercenaries and fanatics. Their skill was a source of terror, and their frightful appearance shook many. Most horrifying, even beyond their size and skill and terrifying cries, was their seeming invincibility. A chemical they used allowed them to brush off and ignore any pain. They were remarked to do things such as rip javelins that had struck them free from their bodies, and hurl them back, and continue to fight with gashes and wounds that would have surely fell a normal man. They were Hannibal's favored Gallic mercenaries, and were used as his personal guards, as they were so devoted and trustworthy, as well as brave and skilled.

[jerby]

There is a description written already for them, but it just didn't get through the maze that's called the 'EB Bureaucracy'.
figures..
already thought the public shouldn't have seen person X bashing Psycho...nice description!

[Kull]

There is a description written already for them, but it just didn't get through the maze that's called the 'EB Bureaucracy'.

That description is in the patch.

[Birka Viking]

:2thumbsup: Nice work EB!!!!Cant wait to play it again with better game play:2thumbsup:

[Masy]

Can gaesatae be recruited as mercs? Also really looking forward to patch.

[the_handsome_viking]

This might seem like a strange question but did The Colossus of Rhodes have a metallic penis made for him?

[Kull]

Yes, and it's featured in the patch. We'll soon post a screenshot of some Gaesatae looking up his skirt and getting all depressed.

[Mad Guitar Murphy]

Yes, and it's featured in the patch. We'll soon post a screenshot of some Gaesatae looking up his skirt and getting all depressed.

lol, omg!, roflmao! eleven eleven eleven!


Those screens look truly awesome, I never imagined such things were even possible in rtw.

[VandalCarthage]

This might seem like a strange question but did The Colossus of Rhodes have a metallic penis made for him?

Horrifyingly, that's a reasonably good question.

[Kull]

"As the weekly cleaning crew set up their scaffolds and ladders around the base of the great statue, they felt the ground begin to shake beneath their feet. A few sudden jarring shocks were quickly followed by a rolling and heaving of the ground, almost as if the land had become sea. Frozen in horror, the Rhodian slaves gazed up to see the Colossus rocking slowly to and fro. And then they began to shriek as a large appendage broke free and plummetted swiftly down, growing closer and closer, a vast cylindrical monstrosity, impossibly large, and equally impossible to escape......"

[We all need someone]

hahaha death by large bronze penis

[Djurre]

is there an ETA ?

I find myself checken the site every hour or so.

[Trithemius]

is there an ETA ?

I find myself checken the site every hour or so.

If there is no release date, then they can never be late! :)

I understand what you mean though, I'm checking regularly myself. :D

[vizigothe]

If there is no release date, then they can never be late! :)

I understand what you mean though, I'm checking regularly myself. :D

As am I, I lurk around everyday soaking in the scenery. when the patch comes out I will be super excited but I am also excited waiting for the patch :D

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

Will this patch fix all of the big CTDs. Like makin the mod actually playable for more then an hour or so. How big will it be (I have dial up) Cant get cable where we live

[Teleklos Archelaou]

Ctds mostly gone with the patch. A few remain in specific situations, but we're still working on those.

The patch is 106 megabytes unpacked. Installer should be able to compress that quite a bit though. We will just have to wait and see when it's finished. No promises as to time or size there though.

[booker]

No release date so far?

[khelvan]

Hmm, maybe Saturday, unless something goes terribly wrong.

[oudysseos]

Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please Oh please

P.S. My wife hates you guys

[Kull]

P.S. My wife hates you guys

Imagine what ours think. I've been sleeping on the couch for 60 days and counting.....

[Djurre]

Great! and the best thing is, i'm not married. the gf will just have to get comfortable with me conquering the civilized world.

[booker]

Awesome! i reinstalled EB beta a few Hours ago. :)

I was off the eb forum for a while, i was wondering if the AI money script have been tweaked?

[Ergion]

Hmm, maybe Saturday, unless something goes terribly wrong.

:2thumbsup: :2thumbsup: :2thumbsup:

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

Hmm, maybe Saturday, unless something goes terribly wrong.
I kind of resent you guys for realeasing such an early version of the game as ive become a dribbling, murmuring reck, and was unable to play EB for a while when my Casse campaign kept CTD'ing. I would find my self downstairs in the middle of the night unconciously ironing sheets of europabarbarorum forum pages about the patch, while as usual dribling continoulsy. BUT NOW THERES GONNA BE A PATCH AND I CANT WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[SpawnOfEbil]

Hmm, maybe Saturday, unless something goes terribly wrong.

*dies and doesn;t get a chance to play*

[Trithemius]

Hmm, maybe Saturday, unless something goes terribly wrong.

*ominous lightning and thunder*

[Ignoramus]

Will you make it possible to download the finished product at the end, instead of downloading 100 patches or so?

[Teleklos Archelaou]

At the end? Sure. Seeing how we have not yet released a single patch though, I think this is a little premature.

[Ignoramus]

Just making sure, because I find very difficult downloading so many patches.

Thanks for this amazing mod, you deserve a lot of praise for this masterpiece.

[khelvan]

Sorry, what do you mean, "so many patches?"

[booker]

I guess he meant in General.. with so many mods around... and some of them with their patches.

Or maybe he meant with those "add on", the animation etc...

I guess he meant to those... coz EB don&#180;t have a single patch yet...

[Kull]

Or maybe he meant with those "add on", the animation etc...

I guess he meant to those... coz EB don´t have a single patch yet...

Touche. Within the team, we're pretty clear on the terminology of what a patch is, versus rushing out little fixes for some of the OB problems. But I can certainly see how that distinction might be lost on the players.

[Djurre]

It's been saturday for over 14 hours now, in my timezone. Time to cut the bull**** and release the patch. will you be adding dragons and wizards and seamonsters and, my favourite, gandalf, to the game?

just checking :tomato2:

[oudysseos]

Gandalf? No, not Gandalf.
Amazons.
Naked Amazons.

[O'ETAIPOS]

As it was stated before no new units this time. But if you want, we could think of some for the next relase. So what which one you want - Dragons, Gandalf or Amazons?

Main team is working on US time Dijure so theyre saturday is in "still sleeping" phase. ~:)

[mike^_^]

As it was stated before no new units this time.

then what's this mean?



The patch is 106 megabytes unpacked.

[Djurre]

I'd go with the dragons. I've found some real reliable sources stating dragons were rather common north of pella, and near the vesusius. Í think i can find some on those intelligent design forums. youd be amased at how wrong we all are. did you know god created earth? really, they figured it out the scienetific way !!!

ok, this is offtopic. I guess i'll have to wat unti tomorrow then. good luch to you all

[Abokasee]

"WE WANT PATCH! WE WANT PATCH! WE WANT PATCH!"

An angry mob surrounds the EB headquarters, bricks, rocks and fireworks blast through the windows, TA is hit in the head and dies instantly, splattering blood all over his office. QwertyMIDX cries like a little baby on the corner of the room, sucking his thumb, with peed pants.

Ranika knows a revolution when he sees one, and he knows the situation is about to get out of control. "We need to put an end to this crisis, if we cannot give them what they want, we must at least distract them long enough to give us time to evacuate through the hidden emergency tunnel." - sentenced Ranika.

Khelvan, the Supreme fearless God of EB, knew what he had to do - "I'm the captain of this boat, and I'm sinking with it. You must all go now, I'll delay the barbarians". But he knew he didn't had the patch, it was all a lie, but even if he had it, what would happen if he caved in to the demands of the savage mob? Give them a finger and they'll rip off your arm, what would they demand next? A port to 1.5 in less than 3 days?

So he thought of something else, Khelvan bravely marched through the narrow corridors of the EB Mansion, ducking from time to time to avoid the pointy, sharp rocks that flew all around zooming through the windows. He approached the balcony and heard the loud angry cries from below.

"DEATH TO EB!" - the vandals shouted while burning EB flags.

Khelvan sneaked to the balcony, took a deep breathe, and rose as a valiant, brave knight.

"Fans of EB! Hear me!" - announced Khelvan.

The crowd suddenly froze, there was absolute silence, except for the sound of the burning flags, and some random screams from EB members who were hit by harmfull objects. But it was silent enough. And then, the crowd finally realized it was Khelvan, their God, and they bursted in joy.

"Khelvan! Khelvan! I love you! Marry me!" - said one of the protesters.

"My loyal worshippers, you gave your blood, your gold and your life for me. For that I am grateful. Without you, EB wouldn't be possible. I have promised a Patch, and I will give you a Patch."

The mob cheered.

"And now I present you, the PATCH!" - And then Khelvan took this (http://www.stickergiant.com/Merchant2/imgs/125/pb8817_125.gif) out of his pocket and lifted it high in the air.

"Ooooooh! It can't be! He came out of the closet!" - said one of the mobsters.

Flames sparkled in the eyes of every protester, they have been fooled, by Khelvan, their God was a fraud. Before Khelvan knew it a throwing dagger hit him in the crotch - "Yeouch!" - he cried.

Then he heard someone scream - "That's what you get for modeling naked fanatics without Tiger-pattern thongs!".

He looked down at his crotch in severe pain and noticed something had been chopped off.

"Don't worry Khelvan, that's what you always wanted, now your sex change surgery will be cheaper" - said Ranika, offering his hand to Khelvan, who was now kneeling at the floor in pain - "Come now, it's time for us to leave".

And since then, nobody heard anything from Khelvan, EB or the Patch ever again.

at what point does bartix help?

[O'ETAIPOS]

then what's this mean?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Teleklos A.
The patch is 106 megabytes unpacked.



Every altered file needs to be included in full lenght, and there are some sprites also.

[Zenith Darksea]

Sprites? Hurrah! At last I can look at some of my units from a distance!

[khelvan]

There are only a few sprites right now, and sprites take up very little space. 35 MB came from the new custom tiles, 30 MB from the UI directory, and 20 MB from animations. If we added even a single texture or unit fix, it would be an extra 300 MB, since we'd have to re-release the patch pak, or release everything in unpacked form and do without the patch pak (not possible for some things, and making other things slower).

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

So whats up wheres the patch??
:juggle2:

[Ludens]

So whats up wheres the patch??
:juggle2:
Like TA said, the team is on American time, so for them it is still Saterday. They never said it would be available Saterday morning. It could just as well be late in the evening. Come to think of it: they never even said it would be on Saterday for definite; it was just an estimate.

[john289]

They said it'd be today unless something goes terribly wrong, so I'm expecting a patch.

Really eager for it

Please EB mod team, make good ol John happy.

[mike^_^]

30 MB from the UI directory

ahh so some of those grey peasants have been fixed? or the new GUI's? little of both? :laugh4:

[Teleklos Archelaou]

If we added even a single texture or unit fix, it would be an extra 300 MB, since we'd have to re-release the patch pak, or release everything in unpacked form and do without the patch pak (not possible for some things, and making other things slower).This applies to unit textures, unit UI cards, building icons, and building constructed images.

[Kull]

I'm pretty sure we have finalized the technical content, but there's still a few remaining things like ensuring the accuracy of readmes and installation, plus building the installer and then ensuring it's hosted properly. So please be patient. I can assure everyone, however, that our patch process does NOT work like this:

It's a quiet Saturday afternoon in the towering EB World Headquarters skyscraper. The corridors and offices are largely empty, except for cleaning crews and a few hard core researchers poring through the piled stacks of papyrus scrolls that comprise one small portion of the vast EB scriptorium (scholars have long mourned the loss of the Great Alexandrian library, but no, the contents are all here). With the imminent release of the long anticipated v.73 Patch, Khelvan and most of the EB Team have taken a hard earned vacation. Along with their supermodel wives and girlfriends, the team is currently cruising the Mediterranean aboard the SS EB, the massive ocean liner/yacht that also doubles as a deep sea dive platform - doing some last minute "research" on sunken Qarthadastim galleys.

Meanwhile, deep within the building lies the EB nerve center, and here, surrounded by walls of humming servers, Kull (who drew the short straw) leans back to get a better look at the massive monitor bank providing realtime updates on every EB thread in every forum on the internet. Taking another sip of chilled Perrier, he notes the appearance of a plaintive post on one of the Org sub-forums, and with a click of a button instantly opens a line through to Patch Central. "Hey guys! Based on my count, we've had 5 straight status request posts in the last hour. Any joy from down there?"

It's hard to hear the answer coming through the speakers, what with the sounds of clinking glasses, pumping music, and throaty female laughter, but Kull was pretty sure he heard these words, "Come ON!! You know the patch is ready! Hell it's been ready for a week now, but that's not the point! In strict accordance with EB policy, we aren't allowed to post this thing until we get 20 straight begging posts in a 30 minute time span!"

[oudysseos]

Hell, I think that we can manage 20 begs in 30 minutes.

That yacht sounds pretty sweet. Does it seperate into a hydrofoil like yer man had in that auld James Bond flick?

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

Ok, well I live in Texas, and you guys may or may not know that Texas is a state of The United States so that means that I am in America, and my time is about 4:45 PM, wich means there should be a patch ready for download. Oh yeah and when its ready will it be on the main EB website under the desolate, and long barren patches section? And totally of subject ive been playing EB for like an hour and it keeps exiting out to the desktop randomly after like 5 minutes, it doesent CTD, as I just click it at the bottom to reopen it but does anybody else have this problem?

[Lord Winter]

Ok, well I live in Texas, and you guys may or may not know that Texas is a state of The United States so that means that I am in America, and my time is about 4:45 PM, wich means there should be a patch ready for download. Oh yeah and when its ready will it be on the main EB website under the desolate, and long barren patches section? And totally of subject ive been playing EB for like an hour and it keeps exiting out to the desktop randomly after like 5 minutes, it doesent CTD, as I just click it at the bottom to reopen it but does anybody else have this problem?
Theres always the left cost, and personly i think we can expect it around 9-10 est so 1-2 GMT

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

What about the exiting out to my desktop thing....any ideas??? An did they say it was gonna be 30 megabytes?

[Simmons]

Ok, well I live in Texas, and you guys may or may not know that Texas is a state of The United States so that means that I am in America, and my time is about 4:45 PM, wich means there should be a patch ready for download. Oh yeah and when its ready will it be on the main EB website under the desolate, and long barren patches section? And totally of subject ive been playing EB for like an hour and it keeps exiting out to the desktop randomly after like 5 minutes, it doesent CTD, as I just click it at the bottom to reopen it but does anybody else have this problem?
Khelvan said maybe saturday not that it will be saturday putting words in peoples mouth tends to annoy them so lets hope they don't just keep the patch to themselves due to your insolence :no:

Note: Do not take this post to seriously :wink3:

Oh and as for your exiting problems are you getting anything popping up an auto update program for example (might try looking at in the system tray)

[Trithemius]

There are only a few sprites right now, and sprites take up very little space. 35 MB came from the new custom tiles, 30 MB from the UI directory, and 20 MB from animations. If we added even a single texture or unit fix, it would be an extra 300 MB, since we'd have to re-release the patch pak, or release everything in unpacked form and do without the patch pak (not possible for some things, and making other things slower).

Not to mention the teams of compressed slaves who are tasked with moving all the palm trees from out of Italy and turning the logs into hobbyhorses so they actually are mounts. This all occupies space in the download.

[khelvan]

The actual size of the download will probably be around 70 MB, with the compression we use.

Hey, I tend to stay up late, and I consider the day as "until I go to bed," so if it does end up being today, and there is still a good chance it will be, it could very well be well into "tomorrow" for you weird people who use clocks and calendars to determine days.

[Trithemius]

The actual size of the download will probably be around 70 MB, with the compression we use.

Hey, I tend to stay up late, and I consider the day as "until I go to bed," so if it does end up being today, and there is still a good chance it will be, it could very well be well into "tomorrow" for you weird people who use clocks and calendars to determine days.

EB will start using "sleeps" to determine when content is released now? :)

[booker]

Well... i&#180;m wating..... hope it can make it...

Oh why left all the texture out?.. we all get High speed conection.. so... it would be cool to include them.. maybe 2 separate pacthes?... and the one who don&#180;t want to include the texture etc, don&#180;t download them...

Just an idea..

[khelvan]

If you want to wait another month for us to put together all the texture/model fixes and such which we wanted to do, we could do that.

The point was to get something out as quickly as possible, and then add a lot of content later. Not everyone has a fast connection, so we'll update a lot of the packed content later, in the next full release.

[Lord Winter]

Will the patch have the modesty patch option in it?

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

lol im proabably the only person on this forum that has dial up:inquisitive:

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

Yea:2thumbsup:

[khelvan]

Will the patch have the modesty patch option in it?No, since the current texture/model is packed, this will have to be included with the next full version release.

[nemesisvsbrad]

It's 11:05pm Sat, in Virginia. It's almost Sunday. :wall: :wall: :wall:

Romani rules the whole world!

Rome demands victory (the patch) from her generals. Cant wait plunder some Gaullic towns and do very bad thingyz.

[khelvan]

Like I said, it isn't Sunday untill I go to bed ;)

[Ambiorix]

California secession ftw!

Back on topic, Khelvan, hurry up and go to bed ;) We in California want to play before we go to bed.

[mike^_^]

can EB just release the bloody patch already and put an end to this off-topic banter

[vizigothe]

can EB just release the bloody patch already and put an end to this off-topic banter
I agree, the only way to end the off topic banter is to release the patch!

[Roderick Ponce Von Fontlebottom]

Maybe to get off the subject of peoples ethnicities, has any body checked out that shogun mod for rome (forgot the name) that looks pretty good! eh, doesent guys?:eyebrows:

[khelvan]

Any more crap like that and I will make sure that we only put the patch up on hosts where we can ban those IP addresses from downloading the patch.

Don't think I won't do it. Your posts have been deleted and you had best cut it out before I get angry.

[We all need someone]

If Khelvan is in St. Louis, then I suppose the patch is delayed.

And if it isn't, then I'm sorry Khelvan, for all your sexiness you certainly are WHACKED OUT. When do you sleep? Or do you even sleep, with your god-like powers negating whatever your corporeal body may demand?

Or else you really should talk to your doctor about Lunesta. Sometimes we just need a good night's sleep...

[Ambiorix]

Wasn't this thread stickied?

[Kull]

Look up.....:2thumbsup:

[Ambiorix]

Gah, the 0.73 thread was deleted and the patch isn't on the site. That was mean... hehe.

*Edit* I am fully aware though that it's not some ploy, ;) Just probably a last second thing to iron out.

[khelvan]

Oh. My. God.

There, I have deleted every single post that had anything to do with coasts. I trust we can all move past this now and not act like five-year-olds any longer?

"My post was deleted but his post was not!" :wall:

[Big_John]

crap, i wish i had followed this thread! sounds like it was a good one. ~;)

[Kull]

crap, i wish i had followed this thread! sounds like it was a good one. ~;)

You know those nature shows where the hyenas are circling some meat and then they just start biting on each other? That was what you missed......

[khelvan]

*Edit* I am fully aware though that it's not some ploy, ;) Just probably a last second thing to iron out.You think so, eh? Wait until I move it back into the public forum with D/L links that lead to 404 errors.

I deserve some amusement after dealing with children who can't play nice together. ~D

[Ambiorix]

Heh, that reminds me of those teachers back in school who would punish the whole class because of one or two kids.

Those one or two kids would promptly have their backsides handed to them at break.

[A$$A$$IN]

Wait, so are the links in the EB site...for the patch? Or am I downloading something that equates to an inside joke I am not aware of? :inquisitive:

[Ambiorix]

Nothing's a joke that I'm aware of... what links are you talking about?

[khelvan]

Uhoh, you started a download before the patch announcement went up? Heh heh, be prepared for a surprise....

[Kull]

Wait, so are the links in the EB site...for the patch? Or am I downloading something that equates to an inside joke I am not aware of? :inquisitive:

smart guy.....

[Ambiorix]

So he started downloading from the bad links you guys had posted for like 5 seconds? Mighty fast of him.

[We all need someone]

now this is getting so cloak and dagger I can't look away...

Khelvan is so sexy and sly...

[Dooz]

Might one enlighten us of what the 'inside joke' early download was? Mighty curious. And I'm no cat.

[khelvan]

Nothing, I just wanted to say that. To amuse myself.

We updated the downloads page before I got the announcement up. What can I say, Paul is an eager beaver.

[Trithemius]

Oh. My. God.

There, I have deleted every single post that had anything to do with coasts. I trust we can all move past this now and not act like five-year-olds any longer?

"My post was deleted but his post was not!" :wall:

I hate it when I miss a flamewar. :(

[Simmons]

Any more crap like that and I will make sure that we only put the patch up on hosts where we can ban those IP addresses from downloading the patch.

Don't think I won't do it. Your posts have been deleted and you had best cut it out before I get angry.
khelvan I'm sorry if anything I said caused any annoyance I thank you and the whole EB team for the new patch downloading it now.

I'm gonna be stuffed for work tomorrow :2thumbsup:

[booker]

If you want to wait another month for us to put together all the texture/model fixes and such which we wanted to do, we could do that.

The point was to get something out as quickly as possible, and then add a lot of content later. Not everyone has a fast connection, so we'll update a lot of the packed content later, in the next full release.

Sorry i didn´t know it will take you more time to include those, i though you already have them, and the only reason why you didn´t include them on the patch was because the Internet Speed connection.

[Ludens]

"WE WANT PATCH! WE WANT PATCH! WE WANT PATCH!"

An angry mob surrounds the EB headquarters, bricks, rocks and fireworks blast through the windows, TA is hit in the head and dies instantly, splattering blood all over his office. QwertyMIDX cries like a little baby on the corner of the room, sucking his thumb, with peed pants.

Ranika knows a revolution when he sees one, and he knows the situation is about to get out of control. "We need to put an end to this crisis, if we cannot give them what they want, we must at least distract them long enough to give us time to evacuate through the hidden emergency tunnel." - sentenced Ranika.

Khelvan, the Supreme fearless God of EB, knew what he had to do - "I'm the captain of this boat, and I'm sinking with it. You must all go now, I'll delay the barbarians". But he knew he didn't had the patch, it was all a lie, but even if he had it, what would happen if he caved in to the demands of the savage mob? Give them a finger and they'll rip off your arm, what would they demand next? A port to 1.5 in less than 3 days?

So he thought of something else, Khelvan bravely marched through the narrow corridors of the EB Mansion, ducking from time to time to avoid the pointy, sharp rocks that flew all around zooming through the windows. He approached the balcony and heard the loud angry cries from below.

"DEATH TO EB!" - the vandals shouted while burning EB flags.

Khelvan sneaked to the balcony, took a deep breathe, and rose as a valiant, brave knight.

"Fans of EB! Hear me!" - announced Khelvan.

The crowd suddenly froze, there was absolute silence, except for the sound of the burning flags, and some random screams from EB members who were hit by harmfull objects. But it was silent enough. And then, the crowd finally realized it was Khelvan, their God, and they bursted in joy.

"Khelvan! Khelvan! I love you! Marry me!" - said one of the protesters.

"My loyal worshippers, you gave your blood, your gold and your life for me. For that I am grateful. Without you, EB wouldn't be possible. I have promised a Patch, and I will give you a Patch."

The mob cheered.

"And now I present you, the PATCH!" - And then Khelvan took this (http://www.stickergiant.com/Merchant2/imgs/125/pb8817_125.gif) out of his pocket and lifted it high in the air.

"Ooooooh! It can't be! He came out of the closet!" - said one of the mobsters.

Flames sparkled in the eyes of every protester, they have been fooled, by Khelvan, their God was a fraud. Before Khelvan knew it a throwing dagger hit him in the crotch - "Yeouch!" - he cried.

Then he heard someone scream - "That's what you get for modeling naked fanatics without Tiger-pattern thongs!".

He looked down at his crotch in severe pain and noticed something had been chopped off.

"Don't worry Khelvan, that's what you always wanted, now your sex change surgery will be cheaper" - said Ranika, offering his hand to Khelvan, who was now kneeling at the floor in pain - "Come now, it's time for us to leave".

And since then, nobody heard anything from Khelvan, EB or the Patch ever again.
I suddenly remembered that this wasn't the first time the EB HQ was stormed. You'd think they would have been more prepared this time...

Seriously, does anybody remember that old thread? I could find the "Truth about EB" (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=57392) topic, but I seems to recall an even older one.

[khelvan]

Read the thread if you want to know why I deleted posts. If you have something you want to discuss, send me a PM. Don't post that sort of thing publically. It does not help the situation.

[Elthore]

?! why is my talk about the coasts immature? I believe when you posted "I like traffic lights" in that other thread outta nowhere just a while ago, you beat me. Feel free to PM me, im genuienly interested in your reasoning. As im sure you've read the rules for these forums, you must know what you're doing can be reprimanded.

sorry, saw your're edit after this post...but you realize, you could have PMed me as well.

[khelvan]

I deleted all talk about coasts because people kept complaining that the flame war which it led to was caused by successive posts further and further back.

I have the discretion to delete flame wars, and I deleted this one, and all posts that led to it. It has nothing to do with you, spam, or off topic posts. If you had bothered to find out what was happening before posting publically about how rude I was for deleting them then perhaps you might have understood what happened and not spoken out of ignorance.

So now, on top of a flame war I have to deal with this. Wonderful.

Edit: I don't have time to PM everyone who has his feelings hurt. Sorry, but I'm not here to walk on eggshells, I'm here to do my job and to try and deal with a patch that has a real problem. If you have an issue, contact me. I'm not going to send individual PM's to 10 people who had their posts deleted. If you couldn't figure out that there was a flamewar which I had to delete I can't help it. Logically you should have deduced that since I NEVER delete "spam" posts, but do delete troll posts and flame wars, that this was a flame war, given my comments. In any case, feel free to challenge me in private and deal with this in a civil manner in the future.

[Elthore]

How am i supposed to know of this flame war if it was all deleted?!
think man, think!
I was under the impression that you had only deleted the 4 posts i had seen.

You need to get off your high horse and let people enjoy EB. Maybe you could let someone with experience moderating a higher traffic forum deal with it instead of yourself.

[khelvan]

Please, if you are going to be insulted and take things personally, I suggest you find a forum where the posters and moderators are much less "mean," and do not create the "unpleasant posting environment" that we obviously have here with EB.

Because, of course, my goal is to make everyone's experience both posting here and playing EB unenjoyable. :rolleyes:

[Trithemius]

Because, of course, my goal is to make everyone's experience both posting here and playing EB unenjoyable. :rolleyes:

Khelvan's tyrannical oppression on the forums is simply a sideline. His masterplan is to get everyone addicted to EB, and then cut us all off.
A truly diabolic work of malign genius!

I propose a motion to lock this thread before people become more aggravated?

[khelvan]

Good suggestion. This thread has been nothing but trouble from the beginning.