PDA

View Full Version : Pat Robertsons Magical Milkshakes



Major Robert Dump
05-27-2006, 01:57
What does God drink to get his pep back?

Orchestrating terrorist attacks on homo-abortion mongers and giving strokes to Hebrews who let the unclean into the holy land can wear a higher power down. Thank God for Pat Robertson's magical milkshakes!!!!!

Pat "invented" this special blend milkshake and because he drinks it every day he can leg press 2000 pounds. Yes, thats right, 2000 pounds.


http://www.cbn.com/communitypublic/shake.asp

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20060526/D8HRO5SO0.html


Shoulda stuck with ripping phone books in half, old man. I hope God gives you a stroke for being an opportunistic liar. If you're gonna prove to everyone you're a fraud the least you can do is get caught doing something cool, like being with a hooker.

Seamus Fermanagh
05-27-2006, 02:08
I heard this on Macrini this morning and got a good chuckle.

Pat's JQ'ed about 25 miles away, so we hear ALL of his stuff.

Let's just say that Pat's been pressing a ton of ____________ about some things for some time.:laugh4:

Tribesman
05-27-2006, 02:35
You don't understand , those were 2000 God pounds , a God pound is not the same an ordinary pound .:2thumbsup:
The leg press must have taken one of those God minutes as well rather than an ordinary minute , as the photos of his amazing athletic achievement in 2003 span a period of 9 years:laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

Zalmoxis
05-27-2006, 02:47
I love capitalism.

Csargo
05-27-2006, 05:39
Thank God for Pat Robertson's magical milkshakes!!!!!

Pat "invented" this special blend milkshake and because he drinks it every day he can leg press 2000 pounds. Yes, thats right, 2000 pounds.

Pat Robertson's milkshake why use Pat Robertson's milkshake when you can have (drum roll)

CSAR'S fantabulous milkshake you can leg press a gazillion mamillion pounds without even breaking a sweat. For more info call 1-800-DUMBA** they'll be glad to help you with your purchase. :laugh4:



Pretty funny MRD gave me a good laugh:laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

Or wait did I cry I can't remember:inquisitive:

Major Robert Dump
05-27-2006, 09:44
ok well in case no one knows what Patty claims to have leg pressed is more then the world record, and more than any known leg press machine could viably hold without breaking in half.

i love this guy, he reminds me of the old preacher in the church i grew up in....as he got older and older and made more dementia-induced sermons the church "elders" refused toi replace him and my dad and stepmom
eventaully left Rogers Lane Chuirch of God when he gave a 90 minute sermon that wa solely about oral sex, and how oral sex -- even between a married couple -- doomed you to hell. I suspect my parents leaving had something to do with:

-they gave each other oral sex and

-There were dozens of children in thje congregation, including a 10 year old MRD, who asked their paretns after the pot luck "what is oral sex?"

Thanks, Pastor Odom, and thanks Pat Robertson. Oddly enough my "real" mom, who was also a Pentecostal, used to make me put my hands on the television when Pat Robertson prayed during the 700 club when i made my weekend visits. Obviously, that did a lot of good for me

Hurin_Rules
05-27-2006, 18:40
I suspect my parents leaving had something to do with:

-they gave each other oral sex and



You are a brave, brave man even to contemplate such things. I, for one, surely arrived by stork.

Strike For The South
05-27-2006, 20:47
MRD I had a pastor like that when I was little. Although weve replaced him:dizzy2: