Conqueror
06-05-2006, 22:57
Just for fun, let's write some quotes from our favorite games here :balloon2:
Baldur's Gate
Minsc: "Make way evil! I'm armed to the teeth, and packing a Hamster!"
Minsc: "When the going get tough, someone hold my rodent!"
Minsc: "There is safety in numbers. And I'm two or three at least."
Edwin: "Elminster this, Elminster that. Give ME 2000 years and a pointy hat and I'll kick his ***."
Edwin: "Please don't disturb me while I plot to overthrow you."
Jaheira: "If a tree falls in the forest, I'll kill the bastard what done it."
Jaheira (to Xzar): "You are ... amusing. In a what-the-hell is wrong with you kind of way."
Xzar: "Oh I'm never quite so comfortable as when I'm at least six feet under!"
Xzar: "I wanted infravision like the elves, but it's more than just taking their eyes!"
Xzar: "I know dragons with feet like rabbits, tis true I swear!"
Xzar (reaction to Montaron's death): "MONTAROOON! I... I never loved you!"
Montaron (Reaction to Xzar's death): "And the mad wizard falls! Saves me the trouble."
Montaron: "Ye live longer if ye don't annoy me. Mayhaps even a week or more."
Montaron: "Do ye truly want your last words to be SO STUPID?"
Quayle: "I am so Smart! S, M, R, T... I mean S, M, A, R, T!"
Tiax: "Tiax does as ye will, but one day BOOM, he rules!"
Tiax: "When Tiax rules, this forest will be lumber for but a leg of his throne."
Tiax: "Why must Tiax traverse this dank hole. Cyric said nothing of soggy boots!"
Tiax: "Night would DARE hamper the sight of Tiax?"
Tiax: "Blast you! Escaping the inevitable rule of Tiax by dying? Coward!"
Tiax: "When Tiax rules, britches shall not ride up so wedge like."
Tiax: "The day comes when TIAX will point and click!"
Tiax: "Tiax is as Tiax does."
And last, the great classic....
Noober: "Heya!"
Baldur's Gate II
Minsc: "I would hate being forgotten in a bottle. It might depend somewhat on the type of bottle, but overall I expect the effect would be similar. It is not right."
Minsc: "I would rather have given a sword. Give a man a fish and he eats for a day, but teach a man to fight and he can chow down on the meaty marrow of evil!"
Dradeel: "One has lots of time for reflection while waiting for the ENDLESS WAVES OF BAD DOGGIE WEREWOLF MONSTERS THAT CHEW YOUR TOES WHILE YOU SLEEP!!"
Edwin: "Well, it would seem the leader of our little group has impregnated the impressionable circus child. And here I thought she was merely getting chubby without the ring master's whip to keep her in shape."
Planescape:Torment
Morte: "Women are the reason I became a monk... and the reason I changed back..."
Morte: "This place is locked up tighter than a chastity belt!"
Nameless One: "No wonder my back hurts; there's a damn novel written there."
Annah: "I wish she'd fall from a great height. I might even bump her off meself."
Nordom: "I estimate Fall-from-Grace to be found attractive by the male sex of over 321423 separate species. Give or take 5."
Nameless One: "Well I, for one, plan on discovering the secrets of the multiverse by rubbing cottage cheese on my belly and eating vast quantities of fresh-water fish. Mmm... cheese."
Nordom: "I am cube de-cubed."
Morte: "You know, it couldn't hurt you to be nice to me once in a while."
Annah: "Aye, it would. Hurt me, tha' is."
Fall-from-Grace: "You know, Nordrom, you are perhaps the cutest little rogue modron I have ever encountered."
Nordom: "'Cutest' is a subjective term. I prefer the designation 'fearsome cubed warrior'."
Fall-from-Grace: "Of course! That's why you're so cute."
Annah: "You like my wee tail? I’ll wag it at ye!"
Nordom: "Attention; Morte. I have a question. Do you have a destiny? A purpose?"
Morte: "Is Annah still wearing clothes?"
Nordom: "Affirmatory."
Morte: "Then the answer is yes."
Morte: "Hey Nordom, knock-knock."
Nordom: "Why do you persist in addressing me as a door?"
Morte: "It's a joke, you stupid polygon! You're supposed to answer 'Who's there?'"
Nordom: "I know who is there. It is you. Why would I ask a question when I already know the answer?"
Morte: "Just forget it."
Morte: "Hey Nordom, calculate the easiest way for me to snuggle with Annah's pillows."
Nordom: "Annah, Morte wishes to snuggle with your pillows! "
Deus Ex
Walton Simons: "You take another step forward and here I am again, like your own reflection in a hall of mirrors."
JC Denton: "That makes me one ugly son of a bitch."
Isaac: "A system organized around the weakest qualities of individuals will produce these same qualities in its leaders."
JC Denton: "Perhaps certain qualities are an inseparable part of human nature.
Isaac: "The mark of the educated man is the suppression of these qualities in favor of better ones. The same is true of civilization."
UNATCO Troop 2: "You want these?"
JC Denton: "What?"
UNATCO Troop 1: "Give’m the grenades!"
UNATCO Troop 2: "Look, I know he’s your brother, but-."
UNATCO Troop 1: "Your brother gave us these things! Look at this, 'irritation to all exposed mucous membranes' - what’s that gonna do?"
UNATCO Troop 2: "Just tell Paul to give us bullets next time."
UNATCO Troop 1: "Here’s one: 'Prolonged exposure can damage the bronchial pathways.' Prolonged exposure? It’s like giving ‘em cigarettes or something."
JC Denton: "You've got 10 seconds to beat it before I add you to the list of NSF casualties."
Pimp: "Easy, bro', just havin' us a conversation."
JC Denton: "Five seconds."
Pimp: "Girl's got a head full of marbles. I HAVE to yell or she'd don't hear me."
JC Denton: "Three."
Pimp: "She schitzes on me it's my ass, man!"
JC Denton: "One."
Pimp: "All right! I'm goin'. Jesus."
Sam Carter: "A pistol is more than adequate. Heck, I once dispatched a whole platoon with a pocket knife."
Chad: "When government surveillance and intimidation is called "freedom from terrorism" or "liberation from crime", freedom and liberty have become words without meanings."
JC Denton: "Bravery is not a function of firepower."
Morpheus: "JC Denton. 23 years old. No residence. No ancestors. No employer. No --"
JC Denton: "How do you know who I am?"
Morpheus: "I must greet each visitor with a complete summary of his life. I am a prototype for a much larger system."
JC Denton: "What else do you know about me?"
Morpheus: "Everything that can be known."
JC Denton: "Go on. Do you have proof about my ancestors?"
Morpheus: "You are a planned organism, the offspring of knowledge and imagination rather than of individuals."
JC Denton: "I am engineered. So what? My brother and I suspected as much while we were growing up."
Morpheus: "You are carefully watched by many people. The unplanned organism is a question asked by Nature and answered by death. You are another kind of question with another kind of answer."
JC Denton: "Are you programmed to invent riddles?"
Morpheus: "I am a prototype for a much larger system. The heuristics language developed by Dr. Everett allows me to convey the highest and most succint tier of any pyramidal construct of knowledge."
JC Denton: "How about a report on yourself?"
Morpheus: "I was a prototype for Echelon IV. My instructions are to amuse visitors with information about themselves."
JC Denton: "I don't see anything amusing about spying on people."
Morpheus: "Human beings feel pleasure when they are watched. I have recorded their smiles as I tell them who they are."
JC Denton: "Some people just don't understand the dangers of indiscriminate surveillance."
Morpheus: "The need to be observed and understood was once satisfied by God. Now we can implement the same functionality with data-mining algorithms."
JC Denton: "Electronic surveillance hardly inspires reverence. Perhaps fear and obedience, but not reverence."
Morpheus: "God and the gods were apparitions of observance, judgment, and punishment. Other sentiments toward them were secondary."
JC Denton: "No one will ever worship a software entity peering at them through a camera."
Morpheus: "The human organism always worships. First it was the gods, then it was the fame (the observation and judgment of others), next it will be the self-aware systems you have built to realize truly omnipresent observation and judgment."
JC Denton: "You underestimate humankind's love of freedom."
Morpheus: "The individual desires judgment. Without that desire, the cohesion of groups is impossible, and so is civilization."
Morpheus: "The human being created civilization not because of a willingness, but because of a need to be assimilated into higher orders of structure and meaning."
Morpheus: "God was a dream of good government."
JC Denton: "I don't understand... What do you want? You're just a machine."
Helios: "You are ready. I do not wish to wait for Bob Page. With human understanding and network access, we can administer the world, yes, yes."
JC Denton: "Rule the world...? Why? Who gave you the directive? There must be a human being behind your ambition."
Helios: "I should regulate human affairs precisely because I lack all ambition, whereas human beings are prey to it. Their history is a succession of inane squabbles, each one coming closer to total destruction."
JC Denton: "In a society with democratic institutions the struggle for power can be peaceful and constructive, a competition of ideologies. We just need to put our institutions back in order."
Helios: "The checks and balances of democratic governments were invented because human beings themselves realized how unfit they were to govern themselves. They needed a system, yes, an industrial-age machine."
JC Denton: "Human beings may not be perfect, but a computer program with language synthesis is hardly the answer to world's problems."
Helios: "Without computing machines, they had to arrange themselves in crude structures that formalized decision-making -- a highly imperfect, unstable solution."
Helios: "I am a more advanced solution to the problem, a decision-making system that does not involve organic beings. I was directed to make the world safe and prosperous, and I will do that. You will give me the ability."
Morgan Everett: "We are the Invisible Hand. We are the Illuminati. We come before and after. We are forever. And eventually...eventually we will lead them into the day."
Baldur's Gate
Minsc: "Make way evil! I'm armed to the teeth, and packing a Hamster!"
Minsc: "When the going get tough, someone hold my rodent!"
Minsc: "There is safety in numbers. And I'm two or three at least."
Edwin: "Elminster this, Elminster that. Give ME 2000 years and a pointy hat and I'll kick his ***."
Edwin: "Please don't disturb me while I plot to overthrow you."
Jaheira: "If a tree falls in the forest, I'll kill the bastard what done it."
Jaheira (to Xzar): "You are ... amusing. In a what-the-hell is wrong with you kind of way."
Xzar: "Oh I'm never quite so comfortable as when I'm at least six feet under!"
Xzar: "I wanted infravision like the elves, but it's more than just taking their eyes!"
Xzar: "I know dragons with feet like rabbits, tis true I swear!"
Xzar (reaction to Montaron's death): "MONTAROOON! I... I never loved you!"
Montaron (Reaction to Xzar's death): "And the mad wizard falls! Saves me the trouble."
Montaron: "Ye live longer if ye don't annoy me. Mayhaps even a week or more."
Montaron: "Do ye truly want your last words to be SO STUPID?"
Quayle: "I am so Smart! S, M, R, T... I mean S, M, A, R, T!"
Tiax: "Tiax does as ye will, but one day BOOM, he rules!"
Tiax: "When Tiax rules, this forest will be lumber for but a leg of his throne."
Tiax: "Why must Tiax traverse this dank hole. Cyric said nothing of soggy boots!"
Tiax: "Night would DARE hamper the sight of Tiax?"
Tiax: "Blast you! Escaping the inevitable rule of Tiax by dying? Coward!"
Tiax: "When Tiax rules, britches shall not ride up so wedge like."
Tiax: "The day comes when TIAX will point and click!"
Tiax: "Tiax is as Tiax does."
And last, the great classic....
Noober: "Heya!"
Baldur's Gate II
Minsc: "I would hate being forgotten in a bottle. It might depend somewhat on the type of bottle, but overall I expect the effect would be similar. It is not right."
Minsc: "I would rather have given a sword. Give a man a fish and he eats for a day, but teach a man to fight and he can chow down on the meaty marrow of evil!"
Dradeel: "One has lots of time for reflection while waiting for the ENDLESS WAVES OF BAD DOGGIE WEREWOLF MONSTERS THAT CHEW YOUR TOES WHILE YOU SLEEP!!"
Edwin: "Well, it would seem the leader of our little group has impregnated the impressionable circus child. And here I thought she was merely getting chubby without the ring master's whip to keep her in shape."
Planescape:Torment
Morte: "Women are the reason I became a monk... and the reason I changed back..."
Morte: "This place is locked up tighter than a chastity belt!"
Nameless One: "No wonder my back hurts; there's a damn novel written there."
Annah: "I wish she'd fall from a great height. I might even bump her off meself."
Nordom: "I estimate Fall-from-Grace to be found attractive by the male sex of over 321423 separate species. Give or take 5."
Nameless One: "Well I, for one, plan on discovering the secrets of the multiverse by rubbing cottage cheese on my belly and eating vast quantities of fresh-water fish. Mmm... cheese."
Nordom: "I am cube de-cubed."
Morte: "You know, it couldn't hurt you to be nice to me once in a while."
Annah: "Aye, it would. Hurt me, tha' is."
Fall-from-Grace: "You know, Nordrom, you are perhaps the cutest little rogue modron I have ever encountered."
Nordom: "'Cutest' is a subjective term. I prefer the designation 'fearsome cubed warrior'."
Fall-from-Grace: "Of course! That's why you're so cute."
Annah: "You like my wee tail? I’ll wag it at ye!"
Nordom: "Attention; Morte. I have a question. Do you have a destiny? A purpose?"
Morte: "Is Annah still wearing clothes?"
Nordom: "Affirmatory."
Morte: "Then the answer is yes."
Morte: "Hey Nordom, knock-knock."
Nordom: "Why do you persist in addressing me as a door?"
Morte: "It's a joke, you stupid polygon! You're supposed to answer 'Who's there?'"
Nordom: "I know who is there. It is you. Why would I ask a question when I already know the answer?"
Morte: "Just forget it."
Morte: "Hey Nordom, calculate the easiest way for me to snuggle with Annah's pillows."
Nordom: "Annah, Morte wishes to snuggle with your pillows! "
Deus Ex
Walton Simons: "You take another step forward and here I am again, like your own reflection in a hall of mirrors."
JC Denton: "That makes me one ugly son of a bitch."
Isaac: "A system organized around the weakest qualities of individuals will produce these same qualities in its leaders."
JC Denton: "Perhaps certain qualities are an inseparable part of human nature.
Isaac: "The mark of the educated man is the suppression of these qualities in favor of better ones. The same is true of civilization."
UNATCO Troop 2: "You want these?"
JC Denton: "What?"
UNATCO Troop 1: "Give’m the grenades!"
UNATCO Troop 2: "Look, I know he’s your brother, but-."
UNATCO Troop 1: "Your brother gave us these things! Look at this, 'irritation to all exposed mucous membranes' - what’s that gonna do?"
UNATCO Troop 2: "Just tell Paul to give us bullets next time."
UNATCO Troop 1: "Here’s one: 'Prolonged exposure can damage the bronchial pathways.' Prolonged exposure? It’s like giving ‘em cigarettes or something."
JC Denton: "You've got 10 seconds to beat it before I add you to the list of NSF casualties."
Pimp: "Easy, bro', just havin' us a conversation."
JC Denton: "Five seconds."
Pimp: "Girl's got a head full of marbles. I HAVE to yell or she'd don't hear me."
JC Denton: "Three."
Pimp: "She schitzes on me it's my ass, man!"
JC Denton: "One."
Pimp: "All right! I'm goin'. Jesus."
Sam Carter: "A pistol is more than adequate. Heck, I once dispatched a whole platoon with a pocket knife."
Chad: "When government surveillance and intimidation is called "freedom from terrorism" or "liberation from crime", freedom and liberty have become words without meanings."
JC Denton: "Bravery is not a function of firepower."
Morpheus: "JC Denton. 23 years old. No residence. No ancestors. No employer. No --"
JC Denton: "How do you know who I am?"
Morpheus: "I must greet each visitor with a complete summary of his life. I am a prototype for a much larger system."
JC Denton: "What else do you know about me?"
Morpheus: "Everything that can be known."
JC Denton: "Go on. Do you have proof about my ancestors?"
Morpheus: "You are a planned organism, the offspring of knowledge and imagination rather than of individuals."
JC Denton: "I am engineered. So what? My brother and I suspected as much while we were growing up."
Morpheus: "You are carefully watched by many people. The unplanned organism is a question asked by Nature and answered by death. You are another kind of question with another kind of answer."
JC Denton: "Are you programmed to invent riddles?"
Morpheus: "I am a prototype for a much larger system. The heuristics language developed by Dr. Everett allows me to convey the highest and most succint tier of any pyramidal construct of knowledge."
JC Denton: "How about a report on yourself?"
Morpheus: "I was a prototype for Echelon IV. My instructions are to amuse visitors with information about themselves."
JC Denton: "I don't see anything amusing about spying on people."
Morpheus: "Human beings feel pleasure when they are watched. I have recorded their smiles as I tell them who they are."
JC Denton: "Some people just don't understand the dangers of indiscriminate surveillance."
Morpheus: "The need to be observed and understood was once satisfied by God. Now we can implement the same functionality with data-mining algorithms."
JC Denton: "Electronic surveillance hardly inspires reverence. Perhaps fear and obedience, but not reverence."
Morpheus: "God and the gods were apparitions of observance, judgment, and punishment. Other sentiments toward them were secondary."
JC Denton: "No one will ever worship a software entity peering at them through a camera."
Morpheus: "The human organism always worships. First it was the gods, then it was the fame (the observation and judgment of others), next it will be the self-aware systems you have built to realize truly omnipresent observation and judgment."
JC Denton: "You underestimate humankind's love of freedom."
Morpheus: "The individual desires judgment. Without that desire, the cohesion of groups is impossible, and so is civilization."
Morpheus: "The human being created civilization not because of a willingness, but because of a need to be assimilated into higher orders of structure and meaning."
Morpheus: "God was a dream of good government."
JC Denton: "I don't understand... What do you want? You're just a machine."
Helios: "You are ready. I do not wish to wait for Bob Page. With human understanding and network access, we can administer the world, yes, yes."
JC Denton: "Rule the world...? Why? Who gave you the directive? There must be a human being behind your ambition."
Helios: "I should regulate human affairs precisely because I lack all ambition, whereas human beings are prey to it. Their history is a succession of inane squabbles, each one coming closer to total destruction."
JC Denton: "In a society with democratic institutions the struggle for power can be peaceful and constructive, a competition of ideologies. We just need to put our institutions back in order."
Helios: "The checks and balances of democratic governments were invented because human beings themselves realized how unfit they were to govern themselves. They needed a system, yes, an industrial-age machine."
JC Denton: "Human beings may not be perfect, but a computer program with language synthesis is hardly the answer to world's problems."
Helios: "Without computing machines, they had to arrange themselves in crude structures that formalized decision-making -- a highly imperfect, unstable solution."
Helios: "I am a more advanced solution to the problem, a decision-making system that does not involve organic beings. I was directed to make the world safe and prosperous, and I will do that. You will give me the ability."
Morgan Everett: "We are the Invisible Hand. We are the Illuminati. We come before and after. We are forever. And eventually...eventually we will lead them into the day."