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Spart
10-10-2006, 13:17
I really enjoyed the last time I put a thread up like this.
Tradition says I start.

You are screwed when, during your speech the enemy knock your walls down and no-one has their weapons out.

Comrade Alexeo
10-12-2006, 05:57
You are screwed when:

During your speech the enemy knocks down your walls and your soldiers have their weapons drawn...








...only they're facing you.

CrossLOPER
10-12-2006, 06:45
You are screwed when, during your speech, a high-speed projectile goes by your head, and you feel a strong need to crouch down and shrill and cry like a little girl.

satchef1
10-12-2006, 15:23
You're screwed when during your speach you realise that your the only soldier there who speaks English

Samurai Waki
10-13-2006, 06:46
Your Screwed when you notice that your the only man left on the only landing craft that made it to the beach.

dacdac
10-16-2006, 01:57
you know your screwed when during the speech your general says, "today, blood shall be spilled, lives will be lost, and the enemy will...beat us. Yeah we're all going to die. I'm going home to have a beer. Have fun dying!"

Ares
10-16-2006, 01:58
You're screwed when half your army is made up of enemy spies.

maximus overlord
10-16-2006, 02:01
ORE IF 100 % OF YOU ARMY IS PEASENTS:furious3:

Ares
10-16-2006, 02:06
ORE IF 100 % OF YOU ARMY IS PEASENTS:furious3:

:laugh4: That's a good one! And true! ~D

maximus overlord
10-16-2006, 02:27
:wall: :wall:
you know your screwed when during the speech your general says, "today, blood shall be spilled, lives will be lost, and the enemy will...beat us. Yeah we're all going to die. I'm going home to have a beer. Have fun dying!"
ps they got the elephants from our zoo's thanks good they didnt take the tigers:wall:

Spart
10-23-2006, 08:39
Once again I attempt to bring you the best

You are a true roman when you can kill your brother and still be named emperor

Andres
10-23-2006, 08:59
You appoint your horse as co-consul and nobody dares to make fun about it.

UltraWar
10-23-2006, 13:22
You plot to kill your superiors.

Andres
10-23-2006, 14:05
You burn Rome because that inspires you while playing music. Afterwards you blame it on the Christians and you throw them for the lions in the arena. The people love you for this and you become even more popular.

Caius
10-23-2006, 19:04
You uses a Roman name in a forum

Motep
10-23-2006, 19:06
you impregnate your sister and cut out the baby

Slartibardfast
10-24-2006, 00:48
When you make two slaves fight to the death as a blood sacrifice at the funeral of your deceased loved one.

Pomerium
10-24-2006, 13:30
When you truly believe in PAX ROMANA!

pvt_isaac
10-24-2006, 21:26
You receive your first hard drink at five, your first sword at four, and your first slave girl at three.

Jesenjin
10-24-2006, 21:56
When you win olympic with last place......

Motep
10-25-2006, 00:11
when its an honor to "please" your father...:fainting:

Jesenjin
10-25-2006, 00:25
You orgy every other day..... if you're in a bad mood.......:fainting:

Motep
10-25-2006, 00:55
you kill you servants for dropping glass

Dark Legionnare
10-25-2006, 11:49
errr...when you drink to much wine..

bedlam28
10-25-2006, 12:09
In that case Dark, me, my girlfriend, my flatmate and her boyfriend were totally 'roman' last night on the red wine !!

I will know I've made it to Roman-hood when my woman feeds me grapes whilst I order the massacre of another barbarian town .. she's not convinced yet... :laugh4:

Sir_Hawkwood
10-25-2006, 20:20
Your screwed when, after checking every forum on the net and know you have the right specs on your PC, you still get

"medieval2.exe has encountered a problem and needs to close. We are sorry for the inconvenience."

When you try to play the demo...

Sir_Hawkwood
10-25-2006, 21:36
You are a modern Roman when,

Red lights mean: accelerate, now!

And you think your horn makes your car faster...

Sr JH

Divine Wind
10-25-2006, 21:58
You chop off a mans penis, and dress him up like your ex wife.

Caius
10-25-2006, 22:22
You are a Roman when you use Roman Numbers and speak latin

Roy1991
10-25-2006, 22:57
You are a Roman when you use Roman Numbers and speak latin


Falsus, Romanus non sum :embarassed:

Hm, I bet I made a mistake in that sentence, lol :stupido:

Caius
10-25-2006, 23:02
:gah2:

CaesarAugustus
10-26-2006, 00:08
In your art course, you make cheap imitations of that Greek exchange student's work.

Lemur
10-26-2006, 03:00
Lark's tongues and eel sound like a fantastic dinner idea.

IrishArmenian
10-26-2006, 04:27
You attend public orgies with men, women and maybe some sort of exotic beast, and are not ashamed of it!

Spart
10-26-2006, 08:47
You guys are legends with "You are roman when", here is somethinbg else for you too have fun with.


You are a barbarian when a futuristic computer game does not allow you to build roads or build stone walls to fend off attacks from short and ugly romans

UltraWar
10-26-2006, 10:12
You use soap

UltraWar
10-26-2006, 10:14
You go around enslaving all you see

Andres
10-26-2006, 11:10
When your smell makes the Roman army run away in agony...

Lemur
10-26-2006, 17:54
When you repeatedly yell, "Gah! Head soup!"

CrossLOPER
10-26-2006, 18:31
You use your long hair as a napkin and refuse to wash it for extended periods of time.

CrossLOPER
10-26-2006, 18:35
When you are full during a big meal, you simply vomit out all that you just ate and get back to the table.

Sir_Hawkwood
10-26-2006, 18:36
...You think track suits make you look dynamic, and think chunky gold jewlery makes you look rich...

Sir_Hawkwood
10-26-2006, 18:41
...You think that the dirty big volcano, belching smoke and magma, is nothing to worry yourself about...

CrossLOPER
10-26-2006, 18:52
You can find any place, anywhere, any time, to sell anything and everything that you plunder.

Bombasticus Maximus
10-26-2006, 19:23
You have one outfit for everything and sleep with whatever woman you want.

Roy1991
10-26-2006, 20:16
see signature :)

SCRIBE
10-28-2006, 06:26
Your screwed when your 10000 man army arrives back bloodied and beaten, with 1 soldier for every 10 men leading the rest with one eye still intact, because everyone else has been blinded!!!

Slartibardfast
10-28-2006, 06:52
...You think track suits make you look dynamic, and think chunky gold jewlery makes you look rich...


...You think that the dirty big volcano, belching smoke and magma, is nothing to worry yourself about...

LOL:2thumbsup:

Slartibardfast
10-28-2006, 07:01
"Your standing in the middle of Athens with a street map an no bugger will give you directions in anything but Greek."

SCRIBE
10-28-2006, 07:21
You think proper negotiations involve cutting off the negotiator's head off and returning his lifeless body back to the enemy camp.

SCRIBE
10-28-2006, 07:26
You blind 10,000 of the enemy soldiers while sparing 1 man out of 10 with 1 eye so he can lead the others back to their king, just to tell him:
"Don't :furious3: with me", and then you end up with a name like Bulgaroctonus

SCRIBE
10-28-2006, 18:44
You consider literacy, education and proper hygiene as social vices.

CrossLOPER
10-29-2006, 03:51
You think that running around shirtless and without shoes in a frigid, snowy place while flailing a giant sword around and screaming "GAAHBAGABAGABA!!!!! BLBLBLBBBLBLAAAAAHHHH!!!" upon seeing strangers is a form of appropriate behavior.

Slartibardfast
10-29-2006, 05:40
....you have to spend a week in the Mediteranian sun just to turn your skin white from it's natural blue.

Sir_Hawkwood
10-29-2006, 17:50
...As a messenger, you have to tell the Emperor,

Sorry, Mi' lord, the grand Army of the North has just been routed by a barbarian army using; rocket powered Elephant artillery, Aquebus o' Crocs, and napalm swine...

Caius
10-29-2006, 23:20
believe in Jupiter

Slartibardfast
10-30-2006, 01:25
.......you smell an underlying scent of garlic and immediately think "Romans!"

CaesarAugustus
10-30-2006, 02:00
You go to an orgy where half the women are your sisters.

Andres
10-30-2006, 14:13
see signature :)

Barbarus non sum :beam:

Mithrandir
10-30-2006, 18:18
Ladies & Gents,

keep things civilised, barbaric as this topic may be.
Keep in mind that this forum is for people off all ages.


Posts containing any generally objectionable material: knowingly false and/or defamatory, inaccurate, abusive, vulgar, hateful, harassing, obscene, profane, sexually oriented

Let's try again from a clean slate.