View Full Version : More testicular abuse
Banquo's Ghost
11-16-2006, 17:08
First Austrians, now the USA. A kidnapper shoots himself (http://www.kansas.com/mld/eagle/16010426.htm) in the crown jewels. One can only hope that his contribution to the gene pool has been curtailed.
BY STAN FINGER
The Wichita Eagle
Maybe it was karma.
Three men attempted to kidnap a teenager in a dispute over stereo speakers shortly before 4:45 p.m. Monday, Wichita police reported. One of the three pulled out a gun and fired it at the teen in the 1000 block of South Wichita.
The shot missed the teen. The shooter jammed the gun back into the waistband of his pants... and it went off.
The bullet struck the 23-year-old man in his left testicle, causing him to cringe -- which caused the gun to fire again.
The second shot struck him in the left calf.
He walked into Via Christi Regional Medical Center's St. Francis campus seeking treatment, police said, and was later booked into the Sedgwick County Jail on suspicion of aggravated assault and aggravated attempted kidnapping.
His companions, ages 18 and 20, were arrested for aggravated attempted kidnapping and conspiracy to obstruct justice.
Understatement of the week: "causing him to cringe...." :laugh4:
Don Corleone
11-16-2006, 17:13
Good Lord, BG, did you cheat on your wife/fiance or something? You seem to have this obession with going out and finding the most excruciating agony the world's idiots have inflicted upon their behnaynays, and publishing links in here, in all their sympathetically painful glory. I'm beginning to cringe and reach to cover my sack whenever I've seen that you've posted, regardless of the topic.
(Just kidding about the infidelity claim, mate, but in the name of merciful Christ, PLEASE, if you have to get this out of your system, watch the collected works of Jackass this weekend or something...:dizzy2:)
Wonder how long it took the cops to stop laughing when they booked him. :laugh4: :laugh4:
Big King Sanctaphrax
11-16-2006, 17:34
The bullet struck the 23-year-old man in his left testicle, causing him to cringe
If this is all he did, this guy is seriously hard.
Seamus Fermanagh
11-16-2006, 17:46
If this is all he did, this guy is seriously hard.
VERY poor choice of phrasing BKS.
VERY poor choice of phrasing BKS.
Hehe, genius.
How do you explain that to a doctor? "I shot myself in the balls"...
Big King Sanctaphrax
11-16-2006, 18:06
VERY poor choice of phrasing BKS.
Hehe, Zing!
Mind you, we don't know what does it for the guy, so...:help:
How do you explain that to a doctor? "I shot myself in the balls"...
I think the massive bloodstain on your crotch would tell him most of what he needs to know.
InsaneApache
11-16-2006, 18:36
Another one who made a testacle of himself. :laugh4:
And it was the left one, too.
InsaneApache
11-16-2006, 19:24
I wonder, when he went to the hospital did he say to the doctor..."Eunuch gonna believe this....." :clown:
yesdachi
11-16-2006, 19:41
causing him to cringe -- which caused the gun to fire again.
That would have had to be one heck of a cringe!
ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88
11-16-2006, 20:18
Guy: Doc... my Nuts...
Doc: Oh My Lord, what in the name of god did you do to them?
lol, funny man :-) :-)
Such articles make me feel uncomfortable. :scared:
just ouch....OMG....OUCH! :dizzy2:
InsaneApache
11-16-2006, 22:35
But....if your bollock has been shot off...does it hurt? ....after all it's now been amputated.....a bit like amputees who get an ichy toe....when the toe has long gone.
Fascinating how the brain works......now there's a mystery wrapped in an enigma....:inquisitive:
ZombieFriedNuts
11-17-2006, 00:37
Ow ow ow ow ow and more ow but he deserved it though,
he tried to shoot someone
I've said I'd give me left nut for something, but it usually was bigger than speakers
Watchman
11-17-2006, 01:08
I swear to God* the very first thought that popped into my head when I saw this thread was "who's talking about his hobbies ?"... :shame:
*...who I don't believe in...
scotchedpommes
11-17-2006, 04:31
But....if your bollock has been shot off...does it hurt? ....after all it's now been amputated.....a bit like amputees who get an ichy toe....when the toe has long gone.
I had heard that these supposed sensations experienced by amputees [i.e. the
"itchy toe"] usually just take the form of a painful reaction, which they choose
to explain as that "itch" - but I would not be surprised if cases vary.
That said, if something were to cause stimulation of the corresponding area of
the brain then you would think that these sensations could occur, given what
testing has shown.
Going to try it yourself then?
{I think there is a risk of these topics becoming something of a weekly feature
on this board.}
Major Robert Dump
11-17-2006, 07:27
wow thats nuts
Samurai Waki
11-17-2006, 08:55
My condolences to the surviving twin.
Kralizec
11-17-2006, 15:52
Now you did it BG, I'm now so worried about my future lineage that I decided to store a jar of male syrup (self made, with love) in the fridge. I just hope my roommates don't find it and confuse it with something edible.
...any suggestions for an ambiguous lable on it?
Pannonian
11-17-2006, 17:31
Now you did it BG, I'm now so worried about my future lineage that I decided to store a jar of male syrup (self made, with love) in the fridge. I just hope my roommates don't find it and confuse it with something edible.
...any suggestions for an ambiguous lable on it?
Hand cream.
Don Corleone
11-17-2006, 17:39
Hey Pannonian, long time no see. ~:cheers:
Krazilec, I have 2 things to say. First, EEWWW!!!! And second, I'm never eating ANYTHING that's come out of your house. (We need a puking smiley).
Pannonian
11-17-2006, 18:03
Hey Pannonian, long time no see. ~:cheers:
That's an unfortunate smiley considering what Kralizec was talking about. Enjoying being persecuted by the lynchmobs in the Gameroom?
Krazilec, I have 2 things to say. First, EEWWW!!!! And second, I'm never eating ANYTHING that's come out of your house. (We need a puking smiley).
The whole thread is utterly EWWW. A common reaction to many Banquo-begun threads, though Lemur takes the prize for recent threads.
Banquo's Ghost
11-17-2006, 18:42
The whole thread is utterly EWWW. A common reaction to many Banquo-begun threads, though Lemur takes the prize for recent threads.
You cut me to the quick, sir. With both thy thrusts.
:vanish:
Kralizec
11-18-2006, 01:09
Hey Pannonian, long time no see. ~:cheers:
Krazilec, I have 2 things to say. First, EEWWW!!!! And second, I'm never eating ANYTHING that's come out of your house. (We need a puking smiley).
I could make a joke about my cooking right now :chef: but I think the disgust factor of this thread is already pretty high :laugh4:
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