View Full Version : The Chronicles of Beirut. Beirut, for Christ Sake!!!
The Stranger
12-05-2006, 16:35
The Chronicles of Beirut. Beirut, for Christ Sake!!!
Once upon a time, when the earth was still young, the human race still strong, the air unpoluted, the forests inhabitated by it's natural inhabitants and the sky still bright with shining stars, a baby was born. It was no normal baby, but a huge baby.
The day was rainy and clowds were gathering above Tosa-Inu's village, Unca-Unca Vey. Frogtoniusa, Tolbert-Jag's wife was pregnant. Her belly had swollen to ridiculous proportions and word spread she was cursed. On the morning of our story her baby was born, under the thundering hooves of the God Kukrikhan.
He came to earth with shining gold armor, weilding an terrible battle axe, he had the size of a young man and gold locks of hair fell down his face, charming but terrible. His eyes could not be seen because he wore a helmet that covered his head till his nose.
When he gulped in his first breath of fresh air he did not cry nor die, but he laughed, a high, evil laugh that went through the spine of even the bravest men. He showed his shining white, ivory like teeth. You could feel his small eyes peek through the room, causing everybody to look down to the ground. And all of the sudden he cried out: "Beirut, Beirut for Christ Sake!!!"
Panic entered the room and people start running and screaming like they were chased by wild animals. That voice was so unearthly, so... no words can describe what those poor people must have heard. But whas worse was the his roar of terror was answered.
Now continue the story :whip: or wait till i will do it...
Big King Sanctaphrax
12-05-2006, 16:36
...
Ok, I think I'm going to let Beirut handle this one. Don't say I don't ever do anything for you, big guy. ~;)
The Stranger
12-05-2006, 16:45
THE TRUTH MUST BE TOLD!!! And you don't know the entire story yet... Beirut is going to be the HERO!!!!!
Come and see, people of the Org.
Today we present to you the testing of the mighty Axe!
Is the Axe still sharp? Is it still swift? How fast will it be swung?
This fantastic spectacle is offered to you by our beloved enfant terrible of the Org: The "he'll never learn it :no: " TheStranger.
Free entrance and free beers on TheStrangers' expenses ~:cheers:
The Axe weilding Hero of the Frontroom is near. Start shouting his name!
Come and see, come and see!
An Axe demonstration as never ever shown before on the World Wide Web. The virtual world will shake and tremble under the blow of the mighty Axe.
:bow:
:cheerleader: :cheerleader: :cheerleader:
I always knew the legendary Beirut was more then a mere man, he's a man with an axe! I heard Chuck Norris looks under his bed every night just in case, all rumors though. I also heard that if you stand before the mirror and say his name tree times he will appear and pwn you, I don't really believe it but I am not going to try just in case.
The Stranger
12-05-2006, 16:53
I donot know what you are talking about... I mean... I doesnt know my adress anyway... My mom says he has a restraining order and that... he is standing right behind me... isnt he? :skull: ~:eeeek:
:weirdthread:
I haven't started this thread... it wasn't me!:sweatdrop:
I haven't started this thread... it wasn't me!:sweatdrop:
Oh, but off course it was :whip:
Well, as i said before in another thread: Having regrets after committing the sin is more fun than resisting the temptation...
At least, if the punishment isn't too harsh, that is
You're dead :skull:
LeftEyeNine
12-05-2006, 16:57
Bye The Stranger, hope to see you ag..Hey..Oh ?
Nevermind.
Dutch_guy
12-05-2006, 16:58
I also heard that if you stand before the mirror and say his name tree times he will appear and pwn you, I don't really believe it but I am not going to try just in case.
Biggie Smalls...Biggie Smalls...Biggy Smalls... :laugh4:
:balloon2:
Well, as i said before in another thread: Having regrets after committing the sin is more fun than resisting the temptation...
Indeed, getting forgiveness is easier then getting permission. But for the foulness that we have seen in this very thread, could any apoligy ever be sufficient? It's like germans that sing, yes the mountains look good and eagels do actually fly there, so there is an excuse but is it enough? I think not.
The Stranger
12-05-2006, 17:06
doesn't anyone thinks its a interesting story i wrote... i mean it took me atleast 30 minutes... a little bit of credit please...
does nobody thinks its a very funny but also educating story about the young dark days of Dot-Orgus? where has this site gone too...
I have to admit that you have found the perfect balance between alternative history, lore and poetry, it's a work of epic proportions that deserves to be recognised as such. I'll be keeping an eye on your future contributions, a breath of fresh air in a stale genre dominated by the pseudo's and the talentless.
The Stranger
12-05-2006, 17:14
jesus... do you really have to be so mean
Today we present to you the testing of the mighty Axe!
Is the Axe still sharp? Is it still swift? How fast will it be swung?
Maybe Beirut will test out his new Ogre War Club instead.
Yes, jezus has to be so mean. At first he wasn't and look what happened to him.
The Stranger
12-05-2006, 17:23
i knew you were going to say that... Bijdehandje... but i was referring to you... You, Fragony, are being mean to ME, The Stranger.
Kanamori
12-05-2006, 17:34
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of spam, I will fear no spam, for Beirut is with me. His axe and His "Closed!"'s, they comfort me.
Have faith.
Maybe Beirut will test out his new Ogre War Club instead.
Oh my, oh my!
The Earth will shake. The World Wide Web will tremble. Agony and fear will be our part for Beirut's New Ogre War Club might be tested today, for the very first time. Entrance and beers are still free, TheStrangers expenses are becoming gigantic. His Bankruptcy is near.
Come and see, come and see!
:bow:
Gregoshi
12-05-2006, 19:51
The Stranger, shouldn't you have posted this in the Mead Hall? That seems the perfect venue for the creativity that resides within you. :bow:
Vladimir
12-05-2006, 20:15
After this, that may be the only place where he can post. :laugh4:
The Stranger: Please enjoy your banning period, it may last for a very long time :laugh4:.
And nice story. :thumbsup:.
Mount Suribachi
12-05-2006, 20:46
You know, when I was one of those agitating for a frontroom separate from the Tavern, I never anticipated it would just become forum for spamming by a few members who equate postcount with status ~:(
Big King Sanctaphrax
12-05-2006, 20:48
Ah well, it's a shame you guys couldn't keep it together long enough for Beirut to get here.
Closed.
I go to work for eight hours and this happens... :shame:
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