View Full Version : Man sets friend's genitals aflame
Goofball
03-08-2007, 20:28
C'mon Lemur, how did you miss this one?
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17515065/
Fire away, Gregoshi...
Somebody Else
03-08-2007, 20:34
Wasn't Dave complaining about some kind of stinging sensation before..?
How did Lemur miss this? It happened up in his neck of the woods.
Wisconsin. In the winter time. Alcohol involved. Is cabin fever a valid legal defence?
Gregoshi
03-08-2007, 21:12
Great balls of fire, man! Do you think I have all day long to do nothing but come up with puns for these outrageous news stories you guys throw out here?! These lighter news stories are killing me. I don't mean to sound crotchety, but I'm ready to start flaming someone. Loins and groins! Give me a break...deep breath. I'd better simmer down before some nut thinks I'm serious about all this.
~;)
BTW, why does it seem like a disproportionate number of the whacko news stories come out of Pennsylvania and Wisconsin?
Gregoshi
03-08-2007, 21:14
How did Lemur miss this? It happened up in his neck of the woods.
Do we know Lemur's real name? Maybe he's in a burn unit right now...
Fisherking
03-08-2007, 21:17
Did he think he was making breakfast…tube stake and egges, or was it just sausage?
I am sure the guy was arrested because there was no cheese involved, it being Wisconsin and all.
BTW, why does it seem like a disproportionate number of the whacko news stories come out of Pennsylvania and Wisconsin?
Vuk comes from Wisconsin. No, this story is not about Vuk. ;)
scotchedpommes
03-08-2007, 23:11
My, I thought this kind of thread had been stopped. This one more idiocy than
misfortune, yes, but I would still be in favour of a compilation of threads.
Do we know Lemur's real name? Maybe he's in a burn unit right now...
It's a good thing I've got this laptop, otherwise I could never post from the burn unit ... umm ... meaning to say ... I had nothing to do with this. I would never be so foolish. Nurse? A little more gel on my thighs please?
I saw you.You filmed that.
*Calls the police*
:grin:
Big King Sanctaphrax
03-09-2007, 00:30
Surely anyone who sets your tackle on fire is, by definition, not your friend? In fact, I would go so far as to call them your most hated enemy.
Adrian II
03-09-2007, 00:45
That's alternative medicine for you. :juggle2:
ShadeHonestus
03-09-2007, 00:47
Surely anyone who sets your tackle on fire is, by definition, not your friend? In fact, I would go so far as to call them your most hated enemy.
At the time of ignition, they may have been..best..friends.
At any case I belive Adrian II has won this thread...all due props to Greg
Pannonian
03-09-2007, 01:17
Did he think he was making breakfast…tube stake and egges, or was it just sausage?
Coq flambé.
Surely anyone who sets your tackle on fire is, by definition, not your friend? In fact, I would go so far as to call them your most hated enemy.
Friends don't set friend's genitals on fire. :no:
Gregoshi
03-09-2007, 03:10
That's alternative medicine for you. :juggle2:
Yep, he's probably not too worried about that gonorrhea anymore - though I'm sure he still has a burning sensation when he urinates.
Jared W. Anderson, 20, suffered serious burns to his hands and genitals, according to the criminal complaint. Randell D. Peterson, 43, who sprayed lighter fluid on Anderson and lit him on fire, was charged with felony battery and first-degree reckless endangerment Tuesday in Eau Claire County Court.
The problem with this is that the burn might not have been enough. People in their youth doing this aren't exactly America's best and brightest. If it managed to cook his tackle all the way then he could be eligible for the Darwin award that I'd hope he'd get.
After Peterson ignited Anderson, he ran into the bathroom, jumped into the tub and put the flames out,
They didn't even have a fire extinguisher on hand. If for some reason I was drunk enough to agree to set my balls on fire I'd hope one of my more sober buddies would think of how the flames need to be put out.
Well someones gotta say it. GREAT BALLS AFIRE! :fainting::tomato:
Trying to re-enact a jackass stunt when you're a teenager is lame enough, but when your in your 40's? some people just never grow up...
IrishArmenian
03-09-2007, 07:09
I doubt the man who was set on fire considers the below-the-belt arsonist his friend anymore.
And I thought inflamed (yes, third rate pun intended) groins were bad.
I can just imagine how this played out.
"Hey, man you should set your balls on fire like on that movie we just watched."
"**** yeah, that's a great idea! Where's the lighter fluid?"
:laugh4:
Surely anyone who sets your tackle on fire is, by definition, not your friend? In fact, I would go so far as to call them your most hated enemy.
C'mon man. This is all a big misunderstanding, Lemur was trying to get rid of his... new little friends crawling around down there. Daveyboy has got extensive experience in this area (so we've heard), which is why he thought a little flaming action (heh) was for the best as a treatment. I'm sure they'll kiss and make up after Lemur's skin grafts have healed. Just don't forget Lemur, skin grafts often tend to shrink and shrivel as they heal. :yes:
:balloon2:
well roasted nuts is suppose to be quite good I hear.:tumbleweed:
Del Arroyo
03-10-2007, 05:45
Yep, he's probably not too worried about that gonorrhea anymore - though I'm sure he still has a burning sensation when he urinates.
And the steal for a comeback! :laugh4:
Alexander the Pretty Good
03-10-2007, 05:51
These threads are only worth it to read Greg's contributions. :laugh4:
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