Most embarrassing defeat

[DVX BELLORVM]

What's your most embarrassing defeat?
If you can beat this one, I'll buy you a bear :laugh4:

https://img160.imageshack.us/img160/2950/defeatne0.jpg

[Monsieur Alphonse]

What was the Timurid army composition? I see elephants. If the Timurid army were mostly elephants and the rest heavy cavalry and horse archers your defeat is easy to explain.

[rvg]

I've had a 36 man unit of my Prince's bodyguards suffer a crushing defeat from a lowly rebel 90 man byz town militia unit... I made a mistake of autoresolving.

[joe4iz]

My simpathies...ouch.

My worst defeat was in the New World. I did not have enough initial units to counter the Aztec onslaught. Though I won the first three battles and took their city, I could not train units faster than I was losing them. I ended up losing the city plus one stack of reenforcements (native mercs) who could not properly assist lifting the seige.

[DVX BELLORVM]

What was the Timurid army composition? I see elephants. If the Timurid army were mostly elephants and the rest heavy cavalry and horse archers your defeat is easy to explain.
Unfortunately I don't remember the exact composition, since I fought this maybe a month ago, and I accidentally came across this screenshot while browsing my tgas. It probably was a bit heavy on elephants.

But I do remember that my whole battle line collapsed when their high dread general, accompanied with the elephants, appeared in front of them. Only my HA managed to do some damage.

[DVX BELLORVM]

My simpathies...ouch.

My worst defeat was in the New World. I did not have enough initial units to counter the Aztec onslaught. Though I won the first three battles and took their city, I could not train units faster than I was losing them. I ended up losing the city plus one stack of reenforcements (native mercs) who could not properly assist lifting the seige.
Now that you've mentioned the New World ~D, I remember one battle taking place in a dense jungle (playing with the English). I completely lost control and command, got surrounded and almost massacred. Somehow I won (probably because I played on Medium back then), but I lost my general and more than half of my army. I guess I can call that "my most embarrassing victory :laugh4:

[Graphic]

Somehow one of my greatest pleasures in Total War games is fighting hopeless battles to the last man, taking as many as possible with me. Bushido!

[DVX BELLORVM]

Somehow one of my greatest pleasures in Total War games is fighting hopeless battles to the last man, taking as many as possible with me. Bushido!
Well, I try to avoid fighting hopeless battles, and always try to beat the AI on a strategic level (bringing more and better troops on the battlefield). But taking a last stand against superior enemy force can be a lot of fun.

[Doug-Thompson]

Last night.

I carefully set up my main Novgorodian army to fight at close to even odds with the Poles. I arranged my troops to take every advantage of the terrain, clicked start battle — and only then realized my whole army was facing exactly the wrong direction. I was lined up against the back of the map and the hard-charging Poles, including Polish Noble cavalry, were sweeping up behind me.

My only excuse was that I'd played until the wee hours of the morning and was exhausted.

Still managed a close defeat — and got my faction leader killed. I didn't go to bed until I brought up another army and wiped out the victorious Polish survivors and captured their general.

[DVX BELLORVM]

I arraigned my troops to take every advantage of the terrain, clicked start battle — and only then realized my whole army was facing exactly the wrong direction.
A, that's a good one ~D Definitely a winner so far ~:cheers:

[RoadKill]

My 5 Star General was killed by a bunch of peasents, I was going to kill myself when I saw that happen. :furious3:

[SpencerH]

I dunno to whom it was embarrassing but I stopped playing after ballistae knocked down the stone walls around my castle and allowed the enemy (with the magic arrow repellent spell) to swamp me with numbers.

[SpencerH]

Last night.

I carefully set up my main Novgorodian army to fight at close to even odds with the Poles. I arraigned my troops to take every advantage of the terrain, clicked start battle — and only then realized my whole army was facing exactly the wrong direction.

:laugh4:

[imnothere]

my general unit is magnetic - they attract the closest enemy spear units. for some reason when fighting the scots (those tough laddies), my english general just...cant...help...himself...to...throw...his...destrier...on...to... the... closest... militia...spear...

at the brink of victory, i charged my 2 existing general units into the city forum/square, thinking that 10-20 militia/spears, fleeing, peeing(themselves) and disorganised won't be a match for my high level 6-7 generals.

guess what? both generals got turn into meatpies in the next 5 minutes. and somehow my routing units (1/3 of the army) rallied somewhat. :confused:

[GFX707]

my general unit is magnetic - they attract the closest enemy spear units.

Yeah, that's really, really annoying. I remember one battle where I almost lost because I had to spend the entire duration moving my general away from enemy units who apparently just wanted to chase after my general....really, ridiculously, shouting-at-the-monitor annoying.

CA didn't take into account that the CPU can order twenty units at a time individually, whereas the player can only do it with one.

Almost as annoying as "Our troops are under attack. We must act!" every 5 seconds.

It's as if they never play their own games.

[Fate]

DVX, You'll buy me a bear? :O
Frickin awesome!!

(presumeably you meant beer lol) :P

[DVX BELLORVM]

DVX, You'll buy me a bear? :O
Frickin awesome!!

(presumeably you meant beer lol) :P
:laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4:

Yes, I meant beer. What would you do with the bear, anyway. Silly me! http://yelims5.free.fr/Violence/Violence45.gif

[ChaosLord]

My most embarassing defeat wasn't actually a defeat, just my most signifigant loss(haven't lost a field battle since reinstalling and patching M2TW) of men was vs Poland as the Russians. My stack of militia units turned to Kiev after sacking Khazar and Crimea(taking revenge on the foolish Turks). Rather than waiting for a siege the superior(I found out the hard way) Polish force sallied out, with me at the bottom of the hill the city was on.

Now really, I should have lost this battle. But the AI committing its general too soon and then chasing routers too long won it for me. I killed their general in the ferocious melee, then took high ground with my general and two units of 20 Crossbow Militia. With that position I routed their exhausted army once it came back from chasing my routers. I lost 635 of my 816 men, and killed/capured 539 of their 703 men.

Of course since they had sallied forth I also won the siege, killing the ones who had temporarily escaped. In the end I got a nice ransom out of it as well as florins from sacking Kiev. Still, its a battle I should have lost and my greatest loss of men so far.

[Zarky]

I got my 20 unit Hungarian army defeated by Byzantine Faction Leader in Autoresolve....
He was that guy with 10 stars and i sallied... Got 600 killed and 200 prisoners executed.... Took Autosave, encircled him and ransomed +10K money from Byzantine... ^^

[ixidor]

Hard to say. In the begining, when i was literally a nerd playing this i got some nasty ones, even though i don't remember most of what i did. Perhaps my embarrising victory was one against rebels. I was playing with Egipt and I saw some rebels around, so since my faction heir was around that area, I recruited 2 units of turkomans and attacked them. They had 3 units from peasents, spear and town militia, plus a mamluk unit. Well, i surrounded the units and with crossed fire i wiped out the mamluks. Then i did the same with the other units and started charging with my general. After put everybody routing with minimal losses, only 20 or 30 town militia remained. Since my turkomans were chasing the routers and they were out of arrows, i decided that a frontal full charge would end it for good. And it ended, not only wiped out almost all unit and finished the battle, the only man i lost in the charge was, guess what, my FACTION HEIR... I lost something like 2 turkomans and 2 bodyguards in the battle, and still, my faction heir was dead... My luck was that this wasn't suppose to be the next sultan anyway, my true faction heir was still 14... Anyway, it was a bit frustating since he was not bad general at all and Egipt seems to somehow lack in good ones.

[Rhyfelwyr]

@ DUX, I had a very similar defeat, with my full stack Venetian army getting wiped out by a couple hundred Timurids with elephants.:no:

I got revenge when they sieges my Castle, and parked their elephants at the gate with their entire army lined up in a column behind them. I concentrated fire arrows on the elephants, and they rampaged straight up the Timurid army.:2thumbsup:

I've also had some embarrassments in the New World. First time I arrived their my army was mostly Venetian Heavy Infantry (low morale though anti-armour) and Crossbow Militia (also low morale and anti-armour). So in retrospect basically the worst high quality army you could take to the Americas. There were a couple of battles with full-stack vs. full-stack, and my front line routed instantly every time.:embarassed:

But again, I got revenge when I brought over some Dismounted Feudal Knights and a couple of Carroccio Standards.:beam:

I also had a pretty depressing defeat the other day. I was the French defending Paris with my Prince and a unit of Spear Militia against the English King, besieging with just his bodyguard. I thought it would be a comfortable win when I sallied, but my militia were hopeless and my cavalry were unable to do the job on their own. So the English King exterminated the population of Paris (just as I was ready to upgrade it to a Huge City and get Scots Guard), only to dye the next turn and leave the city undefended for my Town Militia from Rheims to enter and take it back. Pretty depressing mistake from myself there.

Also had problems fighting the Polish with those damned Polish Nobles and their javelins, had them make mincemeat out of my Armoured Sergeant / Mailed Knight armies.

[Doug-Thompson]

I think I "won" this one. So, what's the process for getting the beer?

[DVX BELLORVM]

I think I "won" this one. So, what's the process for getting the beer?
Yes, I guess you won, although the contest is still open. Regarding the beer, first time I come to Arkansas, or you come to Croatia, we'll meet and have that beer ~D

In the meantime, cheers :medievalcheers:

[Doug-Thompson]

I'll go to Croatia, then, because I'm sure y'all have better beer.

[DVX BELLORVM]

I'll go to Croatia, then, because I'm sure y'all have better beer.
:2thumbsup: Ok, we have a deal.

[Lord of the Isles]

I think I "won" this one. So, what's the process for getting the beer?

It was a bear. But never mind that.

Do you want a high fat content? That would be a gristley beer.

Ice in it? A polar beer.

Made by Scottish & Newcastle breweries? A brown beer.

Sorry to inflict this on you. Just try to grin and beer it.

[DVX BELLORVM]

It was a bear. But never mind that.

Do you want a high fat content? That would be a gristley beer.

Ice in it? A polar beer.

Made by Scottish & Newcastle breweries? A brown beer.

Sorry to inflict this on you. Just try to grin and beer it.
:laugh4:

Ok, I made a mistake, and now I have to beer the consequences. I mean bear ~D

https://img510.imageshack.us/img510/6701/fathertedxr9.jpg

[mike2R]

My faction leader got caught in a castle with about 4 units of militia and a ballista against a little under half a stack.

They rammed my gate and I defended at the gate. There was a slight rise on which I put my ballista firing flaming ammo into the melee - taking out a lot of my own troops but more of theirs.

I thought I was just going to edge it, when the AI chucked his general's bodyguard in and my line started to buckle, so I did the only thing I could and threw in my faction leader.

This seemed to work, and I zoomed right in to watch the fight. Just in time to see my faction leader take a flaming ballista bolt in the back of the head :wall:

[Katana]

Well, I try to avoid fighting hopeless battles, and always try to beat the AI on a strategic level (bringing more and better troops on the battlefield). But taking a last stand against superior enemy force can be a lot of fun.


i had a fun last stand against the irish as the scots last night. i was outnumbered about 4:1, but i still managed to about 3/4 of the irish armies (there were two) with my valiant lads. they fought to the last, and they'll be avenged ten fold as soon as i finish with the norwegians.

[Gaius Terentius Varro]

In Kingdoms Teutonic campaign I sallied against 2 armies of the evil ungodly Lithuanians one in front of me the other coming from behind the town. Well outnumbered i sarcrificed all my cavalry to brinng the enemy cavalry to it's knees killing all their HA and then routing and chasing the rest of the army (with my pikes) to the battlefield border. Well pleased with myself and waiting for the result screen to pop up i noticed that 2 of my my units (all on Exhausted) were under missile fire: when I swung the camera around there was the other army (that i sort of forgot about)between me and the city gates sitting and laughing they heads off, probably. I tried to fight my way back to the city gates but HA killed my slow tired generals (2 of them) then the rest of my chaps routed and I lost the cityand to add to the insult the Lithuanian evil doers executed my faction leader and his cat. I wil l send the Death Star that way asap

[imnothere]

My faction leader got caught in a castle with about 4 units of militia and a ballista against a little under half a stack.

They rammed my gate and I defended at the gate. There was a slight rise on which I put my ballista firing flaming ammo into the melee - taking out a lot of my own troops but more of theirs.

I thought I was just going to edge it, when the AI chucked his general's bodyguard in and my line started to buckle, so I did the only thing I could and threw in my faction leader.

This seemed to work, and I zoomed right in to watch the fight. Just in time to see my faction leader take a flaming ballista bolt in the back of the head :wall:
LOL

General: "Open fire"

Ballista Engineer: "But...Sir..."

General: "Do it now! I will buy you some time!" *Charges into fray*

Ballista Engineer: "...ok...fire...opps...sorry sir..."