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View Full Version : On line help and guidance for the puppies.



RageMonsta
08-25-2002, 03:27
Monsta is not feeling himself so he will swerve away from his usual violent nature and offer some help to those who aim to venture into the arena of on-line play.

Just some general tips to help you survive...this is not tactical advice as that must be learnt, plus that can be found around the Org and other sites such as Planet TW.

Non of the following info is intended to seem like your stupid...it just helps to have a hand up now and again.

1)Practise single player first (at least finish the game on easy if you can).

2)Realise no matter how good you are against the AI...you dogmeat on-line unless meeting another newbie.

3)Be nice and polite...there is no problems with humour but racism/nationalism/sexism etc are not taken lightly.....nor should they in your own life but even more so in our world...nobody (race/creed/gender etc) should feel out of place when visiting us to ...errr..die!

4)Learn whom you are talking to before you threaten to tear off their heads...a loss after a claim of 'come and get some and I will chew off your nose' will only make you look even more idiotic.

5)If you are beaten do not worry...it happens to us all...even the very best..hence the thrill of battle...non will ever be the same as the last.

6)On winning a battle please try and show restraint....a cheering victor is like a rag to a bull and a wiser player will find a way to bring you down a peg and your cheer will soon become tears.

7)If you lose to a clearly more experienced player and they abuse you..ignore them...they should know better and are highly unlikely to be one of the top 100 nevermind the top ten due to their attitude...it wont take you long to remove their lungs and stamp on them (getting hard to restrain violent thoughts....urggghhh... growing...!)

8) Clans are the backbone of the on line game..they are the guys who generally host the tourneys/campaigns make the maps and mods..and hang around in groups whispering to each other.

9)Clans can be very protective towards their members and allies....if you have never been in a TW chat area...you have never witnessed what we like to call a 'chat war'..passions can run high...if abused by a clan member it is often a simple thing to deal with....find out who is the boss...state your case and ask them to deal with the offender....90% of clans are honourable guys...and if you did not spark the flame your complaint will be dealt with....TW is like no other on line experience.

10)When making a clan do not...i repeat DO NOT have an open recruitment policy....there are many 'moles' out there who like nothing more than to infiltrate your group/forum/web site and create havoc..hence the protective nature of alot of the old clans (see how old and protective go well together).

Get friends together...play together for a while make sure they wont disapear after 2 weeks because quake 36 is out.....when recruiting have a trial period or a test and then you may filter out the trash.

11)Alot of the 'oldmen' such as Magyar/Monster/Tera/Amp/Elmo/KocMoc/Tosa and many more (sorry lads this thread is too long to name everbody) may seem 'odd' even arrogant...but if ask in a friendly way these guys can be your best bet for help with any issue concerning an aspect of on line survival/life.

12)Remember alot of us have moved from Japan(although some of us are Mongol like the Wolves based..Rage are errmm Rage...Angels are damned!) so we do sometimes seem very arrogant towards ronin (peasants) but the proper respect from you will work wonders.

13)If RageKrast offers you 'head soup' please take some..offending his brew of life giving bowls of grog may effect your performance....

If Magyar asks you if you can 'dance' the Mongol cha cha...join him for a lesson and feel what its like to a tea bag.

If a Takiyama (Mizu--- online) offers advice about the games inner workings listen..they are the dogs bollox concerning this.

If Tera asks who is the oldest clan in TW reply KENCHI asap....if he hasnt told you already!

If Monsta is drinking 'coffee' and threatens to skin you alive and eat your goldfish.,lock the door....wait 20 mins and then he will have taken a deep breath and no doubt say sorry and give you a couple of his wives...to eat!

If an Angel clan member says 'trust me'..smile and remember they are nice but only when they are chained to something.

If you aim to have fun...even become a 'legend' in battle....thinking first before speaking helps...being friendly will get you far and respecting the 'oldmen' will get you a wife and your ouwn kingdom.

Have fun....expect no mercy....be a part of the world and we will greet you will open arms and a sword to cuts bits of your body off (think my nice is used up for this decade!)

MagyarKhans Cham
08-25-2002, 03:48
that should be printed at the .coms frontpage

who will ask TheShogun that?

Kraellin
08-25-2002, 03:49
hehe...some choice wise words there :)

K.


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The only absolute is that there are no absolutes.

RageMonsta
08-25-2002, 03:58
You think they would keep in the 'dogs bollox' reference! MUAHAHAHA.

08-25-2002, 04:13
Very good points indeed http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif

TheShogun probably never played an online game of Shogun so I fear he won't understand half of what Monsta said...but you won't pay for giving it a shot http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif


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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

barocca
08-25-2002, 04:28
Does a revitalised clan qualify as the oldest clan?
http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/tongue.gif
there are 2 who have never closed their doors and still have original members in them you know...
http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

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Clan Doragons Medieval Website
Mods, Unit Descriptions and more
DoragonBarocca of Clan Doragon (http://doragon.cjb.net)

JRock
08-25-2002, 04:36
Quote Originally posted by RageMonsta:
12)Remember alot of us have moved from Japan(although some of us are Mongol like the Wolves based..Rage are errmm Rage...Angels are damned!) so we do sometimes seem very arrogant towards ronin (peasants) but the proper respect from you will work wonders.[/QUOTE]


Erm, slight note - ronin are masterless samurai, not peasants. Perhaps you meant another word?

The rest of your words are well written.

[This message has been edited by JRock (edited 08-24-2002).]

08-25-2002, 04:51
Quote Originally posted by barocca:
Does a revitalised clan qualify as the oldest clan?
http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/tongue.gif
there are 2 who have never closed their doors and still have original members in them you know...
http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

[/QUOTE]

Kenchi would still be oldest by 6 months or so http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/tongue.gif [who I didn't tell yet?]



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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

barocca
08-25-2002, 05:05
hows that Tera?

The 2 oldest clans watched Kenchi fall,
and lamented Kenchi's passing,
both times...

08-25-2002, 05:12
Quote Originally posted by barocca:
hows that Tera?

The 2 oldest clans watched Kenchi fall,
and lamented Kenchi's passing,
both times...[/QUOTE]

It's a quite long story but here is a timeline.

Spring 2000 - Kenchi is formed
August 2000 - Kenchi is the strongest clan
December 2000 - Kenchi falls inactive
Early 2001 - Kenchi is active again (Satake and co)
2001 - Kenchi is active all year and peaked with the online campaigns
Earliest 2002 - Kenchi had a downtone after the death of the last campaign
2002 - Kenchi is back in full form

Uhh, that's all I think. Cleared it I hope.

Back on the original topic before we start counting the days and months one by one http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif

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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

barocca
08-25-2002, 05:19
check staff forum
http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

RageMonsta
08-25-2002, 05:23
JRock....thanx for the info but Monsta was aware of this....apart from reading a passage from Hagakure each morning and performing my Kaishaku duties of a weekend...Monsta has slight knowledge of the ways and terms of the Samurai....although my Japanese is often limited even though many an hour has been spent with MizuTosa san and his Japanese dictionary....the statement was an example of many a clan members attitude towards non clan members.....known as ronin...or ricefarmers to the Monsta.

I think maybe a slightly edited version of the post could be put somewhere.. along with the post that was present in STW forum that explain terms abrevs (GL/HF/GG etc) and the workings of the Org forum.....plus additions and pieces that could be included by other more experience players....hows about it Orgy folk...a players on-line player guide...of course subject matter would need to be relevant...but humour must not be ignored.

Magyars guide to horse warfare

Krast-The translation and other cooking manuals

Elmo- My skill at hiding skill a.k.a a smile is worth a thousand scowls.

Monsta is willing to 'fresh out'the puppies guide...clean it a bit (not too much) of the violent parts and offer it to the highest bidder (lets start at 500 heads and a pot of jam!).

BTW...being a clan means being on-line...at least once a week and having at least 5 members (as was said to be the number a while back on .com)...sooooo if ya not active the time spent away cannot really be considered...(this law is a direct message from the inner ci....oops).

Monsta should have also mentioned the rumours about shapes etc or anything slightly related to them are false..move along nothing to see here.(newbies....dig for this reference and ye shall be enlightend)

08-25-2002, 05:29
Happy to see that post Bar http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif

All clans have downtones anyway, speaking of Rage...in the last campaign we didn't see a Rage for 3 or so months and during the last months Rages weren't common too...but THAT applies for all clans anyway. (MI = 20 peeps max shame) Fears had, Wolves had, blah blah http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif But why discussing on it...it's just a small technical point...let's thrive to detect the strongest clan...in the future.



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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

08-25-2002, 05:31
Quote Originally posted by RageMonsta:
(this law is a direct message from the inner ci....oops).
[/QUOTE]

Ouch, overlooked that...what about the outer ci(snip!)

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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

Itonami
08-25-2002, 05:58
Quote Originally posted by RageMonsta:

12)Remember alot of us have moved from Japan(although some of us are Mongol like the Wolves based..Rage are errmm Rage...Angels are damned!) so we do sometimes seem very arrogant towards ronin (peasants) but the proper respect from you will work wonders.


If an Angel clan member says 'trust me'..smile and remember they are nice but only when they are chained to something.
[/QUOTE]

LOL, would that mean we from hell? Or that we are banned from hell or what? IM SO CONFSUED!!!!

And yes, but just remember, steel ISNT strong enough. Diamonds might do.....

[This message has been edited by Itonami (edited 08-24-2002).]

RageMonsta
08-25-2002, 06:28
I like Angels..they seem to be learning how to be evil without insulting your mother....dunno where they get some of their ideas from?

Unless they can apply a certain amount of class to their dealings they will never grow to the dizzy heights of hellishness as the Demon Khans did.....being an ex member of the Demons (like somebody else who actually now moderates one of these forums..who shall remain unmention for fear he may lose his Org job.ahemsoulahem) we were 'naughty' and under the guidance of Mr Naughty himself good old Demon.

But when talking once many moons ago to MagyarKhan about the 'evil' clans he said something quite true (and expected from Mr Wolf) he said something on the lines of 'Well we need somebody to kill'.

Bad guys are fun....as you all know Rage are angelic...but being bad does not need to be stupid and abusive...watch the film Shane for tips...'Pick up the gun'.

08-25-2002, 06:30
The good old SOZO just gets better and better http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif



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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

TenkiSoratoti
08-25-2002, 06:30
great advice but i already new all that hence being a newbie 5 months ago.

i respect all elders and betters (as i am one of the youngest totalwar players around, i think).

Actually there should be a vow made and all players should have to repeat it and learn it of by heart, sound good? (no didnt think so)....

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"The good fighters of the old first put themselves beyond the possibility of defeat, and then waited for an oppurtunity to defeat the enemy."

Jemasze Toda
08-25-2002, 12:46
...and the time will come when another evil little man arrives at mediEVIL europe in order to behave a bit ... well....evil!

Laugh at him, kick him, beat him, make fun of him, flame him....he utterly deserves it!

that guy is a damn joke!

Watch out for TheFool !! http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/biggrin.gif

LordTed
08-25-2002, 15:14
Someone forgot me the 'honor hunter'

BarryNoDachi
08-25-2002, 16:53
good advice guys i just want to add dont be scared of these guys, i know they look kinda crazy but they will help you if you ask http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/biggrin.gif

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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)

mizuYari
08-25-2002, 17:53
Another song for Monsta (a Yankee rock-n-roll song, no less):

I still love the good time Shogun
that kind of games that sooth your soul;
a reminescent of days of old;
I still love good time Shogun

MizuYari
ps: game didn't even showup at Fry's yet. I'll go to a different store tomorrow...

RageMonsta
08-25-2002, 20:05
fry aint stupid......he knows we got the 'goods' on him.

btw...did the store owner ever star in Futurama?

ShadeWraith
08-26-2002, 02:40
Quote Originally posted by barocca:
The 2 oldest clans watched Kenchi fall,
and lamented Kenchi's passing,
both times...[/QUOTE]


Who were these two oldest? http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

Wraith

08-26-2002, 03:29
Quote Originally posted by ShadeWraith:

Who were these two oldest? http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

Wraith


[/QUOTE]

Someone thought they were elder but they were indeed wrong http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif Shades and Doragon are of the same era as Wolves/Rage ...2nd half of 2000.



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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

MagyarKhans Cham
08-26-2002, 03:46
Chain and Chaos?

RageMonsta
08-26-2002, 03:50
Laurel and Hardy?

08-26-2002, 04:18
Hmm, following Cape's research in the records this would be the chart of still existing clan:

Kenchi - 79
Fear - 17448
Takiyama - 20746
Shades - 27332
Rage - 27813
Ronin Warlords - 27818
Doragon - 29890

To reply to Magyar's dilemma I did some research too:

Chain = 18103
Chaos = 2384

[discussion on old clans in CLANS forum...topic 'Old Clans', thx.]


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Clan Kenchikuka (http://www.totalwar.org/kenchikuka)
evil is within us... http://www.totalwar.org/site/emomalta.gif

[This message has been edited by Terazawa Tokugawa (edited 08-25-2002).]