This game is silly! PATCH NEEDED!!!! (parody)

[Arkatreides]

This game is the worst I EVER played. It is sooooooooooo unfair!!!! My people rvolt! That is silly!!! People never revolt!!! THIS NEEDS TO BE PATCHED!!! It is soooooo SILLY that I need to leave units behind in provinces!!!! And it sucks as well because I cannot conquer the whole map in 20 turns!!!!

THIS NEEDS TO BE PATCHED!!!!

I also want to be able to attack ANY province!!! Otherwise it is not fair!!!! I don't want to build any ships as they are silly!!!!

THIS NEEDS TO BE PATCHED!!!!

The AI cheats too!!!!! I attack the enemy civalric knights with my spearman (AND IT SAYS GOOD AGAINST CAVALRY) and they loose!!!! THIS SUCKS!!!! I cannot afford more than a single unit of spearman due to the ABOVE BUGS!!!

When I attack a province the enemy just gets the best position on the map and defends!!!! THIS IS UNFAIR!!!! AND SILLY!!! AND TOTALLY UNREALISTIC!!!! My single unit of archers CANNOT defeat them if they hide up a hill in the woods!!!!! THIS SUCKS!!!! It is sooooooo unfair!!!!

THIS NEEDS TO BE PATCHED!!!!

Enemy nations suck as well!!! They constantly stop me from taking their provinces!!!!!! THIS SUCKS AND NEEDS TO BE PATCHED!!!! Otherwise it is really hard to win!!!

THIS NEEDS TO BE PATCHED!!!!

I SHOULD HAVE WON THE GAME IN 20 TURNS BUT THE GAME IS SOOOO BUGGED THAT I COULDN'T!!!!!! I AM A BRILLIANT PLAYER AND KNOW THAT THE GAME IS UNFAIR!!!!

I WILL NEVER PLAY THIS GAME AGAIN UNTIL IT IS ALL PATCHED!!!!!!!

Instead I will play solitaire! (which also used to be bugged and needed a patch until I discovered the undocumented CTRL+ALT+SHIFT move!)

[Tankdogg123]

That was sarcastic I hope.

[Krypteia]

lol, someone hacked his account??

[JRock]

He's trying to be funny. Key word: trying.

Notice his topic says "parody" in it. IOW, he's making fun of the people who act like that. http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/rolleyes.gif

[Didz]

Nice one Ark.

At least I appreciated it.

[Gregoshi]

Things I'd like see in a patch:

1) a "don't have to pay for units or buildings" option. http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif

2) It would be cool if catapults and trebuchets could fling your units over the wall and into castles. Knocking down walls is so lame.

3) All maps should be downhill only, that way you always attack/defend from a superior position.

4) Rebellions loyal to you should spring up in other factions' territory. After all, you do have the coolest king-dude in all Europe.

5) There should be weapon, armour, valour, morale, invisibility, and invulnerability powerups placed around the battlefield. That would really make MTW rock!

6) a .rogaine. cheat to use when your faction has no "heirs". http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif

7) Add a bakery building that allows a general or royal to increase his piety when trained there.

If any of these make it into the next patch, I'll never play MTW again. http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/biggrin.gif

------------------
Gregoshi
A Member of Clan Doragon

[This message has been edited by Gregoshi (edited 09-12-2002).]

[JRock]

I'd like to be able to play as the Americans. Why you guys gotta hate on America and leave us out of the game?! http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/mad.gif

[Xiahou]

Nice one Ark, alot of that sounds familiar, no? http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

[Red Inquisition]

And the speacial unit for the Americans should be a Stealth Fighter that drops Nukes!
I mean come on we NEED it. http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/wink.gif

[+DOC+]

rofl @ JRock

"I wanna play the Americans..."

now that really did make me chortle http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/biggrin.gif

[Arkatreides]

I wanna play as the Japanese!!! With COOL samurai units!!! And NINJAs!!! That would be soooo great!!!

erm ...

well ...

oh ...

nevermind

*goes off and plays Shogun*

[CrazyIvan]

I've had a rebellion loyal to me spring up while playing the English - the French took back one of their provinces up popped a rebellion slaughtered the French and I got control of a couple of nice units I couldnt produce http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

Ivan

[Gregoshi]

ROFL JRock!

I thought the same thing a few months back when the factions were first listed. The .com forums were swamped with posts "How come isn't included in MTW!?" or "Why is only a minor faction?". And then there was the controversy over colours. http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/smile.gif

------------------
Gregoshi
A Member of Clan Doragon

[ToranagaSama]

Its just too funny to even laugh at, as every point in Arkatreides' post is based on a post that someone "actually" made.

My favorite? some actually did post btching that the AI didn't come down off its hill and fight?? S/B patched!

[deejayvee]

This game is so buggy it keeps crashing everytime I go into it. It's not my system either because I have a 486!!!!

[Grifman]

Good job, man, that was funny - and so sad in so many ways. LOL!

Grifman

[Major Robert Dump]

I liked it Ark.

You need to be patched.