What game would Jezus play?

[Adrian II]

Had a good laugh with this one (http://www.cracked.com/article_15672_praystation-6-most-misguided-christian-video-games.html). Please comment and make me laugh some more. :rolleyes:

Test the wares, my friends:


There's no passage in the bible that says, "And thou shalt lift lots of animals over your head and carry them to Jerusalem." Also, the way you lose in the Baby Moses game is by dropping Moses in the river which feels a little morbid for a game that is presumably aimed at children. Not only have you just drowned a baby, but you've doomed the Jews. Nice going, kid.
Or this one:


Winning the game requires knowledge of a bunch of obscure bible trivia, constantly completing bizarre mini games that seem to be pointless rituals of repetition, and even if you do everything you're supposed to, God can randomly take everything away from you. In other words, it's just like being a devout Christian.

[Mouzafphaerre]

.

What game would Jezus play?
Find out my posts in the what are you playing thread and learn. Yea, I'm that holy. :yes:
.

[rory_20_uk]

And there was I thinking of "the Sims"...

~:smoking:

[Gregoshi]

What game would Jesus play? Halo, Halo 2 and Halo 3 of course.

[drone]

Duke Nukem Forever. Because he (and only he) can. ~D

[Tribesman]

It would have to be armageddon

[Geoffrey S]

Congratulations! You have won!
But in order to live a victorious life, you need to give your heart to Jesus Christ. Refer to the end of our manual.
Manual? The Bible? What about troubleshooting?

[CountArach]

What game would Jesus play? Halo, Halo 2 and Halo 3 of course.
:laugh4: That was a great effort...

[ajaxfetish]

Ha! A friend of mine came across #2, The Bible Game, and brought it to a party at my place a few months back. It was the funniest video game I've ever played (all unintentional humor, of course). It took tacky to new extremes and we were all quickly rooting for the Wrath of God to strike.

Ajax

[HoreTore]

I had that Noah game on an old 386, came with one of those bundles of 1-200 games you got back then...

It didn't work though. It worked for a few minutes, then crashed.

[Adrian II]

It took tacky to new extremes and we were all quickly rooting for the Wrath of God to strike.
It worked for a few minutes, then crashed.There is a ring of truth to what the authors say:


Not surprisingly, we found that devout fundamentalists
often make incredibly bad game designers.They have the same shortcomings as the Islamic boomsky crowd: no sense of humor, no imagination, no class.

[Ronin]

Hockey obviously..


http://zoom.cafepress.com/0/9991920_zoom.jpg

:laugh4:

[Andres]

:laugh4:

[Vladimir]

My favorite, in all it's variations.

https://img169.imageshack.us/img169/5890/343p0c1byd0.jpg

[Rameusb5]

My favorite, in all it's variations.

https://img169.imageshack.us/img169/5890/343p0c1byd0.jpg

OK, I'm stealing that!


:laugh4:

[Philippus Flavius Homovallumus]

My favorite, in all it's variations.

https://img169.imageshack.us/img169/5890/343p0c1byd0.jpg

Mine too, curse you for posting first.

[Reverend Joe]

https://img137.imageshack.us/img137/4893/jesusdoomhh7.jpg

...And the obligatory "Jesus Saves" joke:

https://img150.imageshack.us/img150/6356/jesusshavesjpgav8.jpg

Also, no offense meant to Jesus. I think he was an alright character; I just hate the people who built a crazy-ass cult up around him.

Seriously, if he does come back, he's gonna be pissed at what the Christians have done in his name.

"Damnit, no -- I said SAVE them, not KILL them!"

...@Adrian: You misspelled "Jesus."

[Vladimir]

He's had a problem (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=98412)with that lately. Tisk Tisk.

[Adrian II]

He's had a problem (https://forums.totalwar.org/vb/showthread.php?t=98412)with that lately. Tisk Tisk.I know. Vlamidir here has been a big help. :shame: