Obama please socialize my marriage

Federalizing banks and GM and insurance and corn farmers works very well so I would like to see socialized marriage next because me and my wife fight a lot and marriage is a failing institution just like GM and CitiBank.

Like sometimes I want to go have beer night but my wife says its snuggle night and we fights. Sometimes I want pot pie for dinner and she want little bunny she strangle for korean dish and we fights. Obama pls help!!!!

I was thinking maybe the government could have a monthly menu that every family had to serve. This would help the economy because stores and diners and Del Rancho could know exactly what to sell and husband and wives would not fight because its the governments fault. Also you could tell your kids to eat their broccoli or they go to jail and it would be true finally (whew!) The Dinner Czar could make up the menu from the food pyramid so you get healthy servings from each food group, and the Dinner Czar would answer to the USDA Czar who answers to the Czar Czar. So like when my wife is mad that she wants starches and fatty oils for dinner I could be like "no we already had that for lunch we need 2 veggies, a meat and a fruit if you don't like it call the Dinner Czar and maybe vote next time."

Also, like the government could say that for example the second and fourth Tuesday of each month was sex night. This would be cool because then when wife wasn't in the mood I could tell her it is her duty to country and call her unpatriotic if she don't like go to town hall meeting until she comes around and BADDA-BING. This would also save us money on health care because then we could know when all babies will be born and the maternity wards in hospitals could close on the weekends and this would also help the golf indistry!!!!

Also there could be movie night so we all had to go to movies and save struggling hollywood from going hungry because omg katie holmes looks so hungry she needs more food pyramid!!!!! The government could also tell us what kind of car to buy for example two car households could have up to one (1) american car made in mexico and up to one (1) asian car made in america and when little Bobby or Suzy need a car at 16 they could get a german one but only if they display the german-permit decal on their window so people don't think we unpatriotic.

This will work, this is future, yes we can!

I sense deep irony, sarcasm, cynicism and what not... So what you're saying is, Obama is a ungrateful commie who shouldn't be your president?

Honk to impeach? :clown:

Funny but a complete strawman.

Actually it's a cry for help because my marriage is failing. Thanks a lot, jerks.

Was the OP a Red Alert post?

Might as well.

someone have socialism and flat-market-communism confused :)

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The government could also tell us what kind of car to buy for example two car households could have up to one (1) american car made in mexico and up to one (1) asian car made in america

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:2thumbsup::2thumbsup::2thumbsup:

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Originally Posted by Kadagar_AV

someone have socialism and flat-market-communism confused :)

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Indeed. Like 99,9% of the world*, socialists favour a mixed economy. There is no planned economy vs. free market anymore, nobody wants either, we're just arguing how much state and how much private influence we want in the mixed economy we all agree is the best solution.

Also, Obama is far, far away from socialism, and even most european labour parties(nulab don't count)... He's closest to our liberal, centrist parties, IMO.

*at least if we only count the ones we care about

Maybe it is time to invade another wife?

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Originally Posted by HoreTore

Also, Obama is far, far away from socialism, and even most european labour parties(nulab don't count)... He's closest to our liberal, centrist parties, IMO.

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I know, eh?

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Originally Posted by Major Robert Dump

Actually it's a cry for help because my marriage is failing. Thanks a lot, jerks.

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Sure. Now that the honeymoon is over you're willing to share. Sorry comrade, you married her, you deal with her. Get a second job so you don't have to be home much. Or better yet, use that as an excuse and find a girlfriend *don't marry this one meathead* to take you in and hang out there. Come on, you're a supposed member of the male species *the dominate alpha gender* for god's sake, start acting like one.

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Originally Posted by Hosakawa Tito

Sure. Now that the honeymoon is over you're willing to share. Sorry comrade, you married her, you deal with her. Get a second job so you don't have to be home much. Or better yet, use that as an excuse and find a girlfriend *don't marry this one meathead* to take you in and hang out there. Come on, you're a supposed member of the male species *the dominate alpha gender* for god's sake, start acting like one.

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This is my new bible....

You're in the Army, right? There are plenty of other wives for you to spend time with. Trust me, it's not so bad.

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Originally Posted by Hosakawa Tito

Sure. Now that the honeymoon is over you're willing to share. Sorry comrade, you married her, you deal with her. Get a second job so you don't have to be home much. Or better yet, use that as an excuse and find a girlfriend *don't marry this one meathead* to take you in and hang out there. Come on, you're a supposed member of the male species *the dominate alpha gender* for god's sake, start acting like one.

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Best advice I've heard in the past 10 years. :egypt: