New Element Heaviest Known

More stuff from my email inbox, forgiveness please if its been posted before

New Element Heaviest Known Science

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest chemical element yet known to science. The new element has been tentatively named Governmentium

Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since

Governmentium has no electrons, it is completely inert. However, it can be detected, as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. In fact, a minute amount of Governmentium can cause one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a strange reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. Scientists were astonished to learn that Governmentium mass actually increases over
time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons, thereby forming isodopes.

This characteristic of ever-increasing moron production has led some scientists to speculate that Governmentium may be formed whenever enough morons cluster together and reach a certain theoretical quantity. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass. You will know it when you see it.

ichi :bow:

WOW, Ichi I'm so astonished and surprised. How do you find time to make such non-clever escapades? ~:)

*Falls over on the floor laughing* ~:joker: ~:joker: ~:joker: ~:joker: :laugh4: :laugh4: :laugh4: :jester: :laugh: :laugh2: :laugh2:

Hmmm I get the feeling as if this is all made up are some scientists trying to lie to me? hmm it is very hard to belive. ~:)



$10 bucks says someone will think I am serious and I will later have to get them to highlight this text to make them look foolish

That's a good 'un. Interesting... I quite literally just received tat in an e-mail myself. Must be a recent thing.

Wow after the first paragraph I was left wondering who in their right mind names an element Governmentium. Then cleverly I realized the ruse.

Good laugh ichi. ~:cheers:

Did the writer spell it as morons and isodopes?

You'd think it would be easier to find since it is so heavy and beuracratic..... Maybe it got lost under the paperwork?

At first glance, I wondered, why the heck did they name an element after the cesspool that is government.

And then I read a bit more...

~D ~D ~D

Crazed Rabbit

i saw that about six months ago on another forum, still pretty funny.
thanks,
dizzy

I like it, sounds very real. ~D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NimbleNota

$10 bucks says someone will think I am serious and I will later have to get them to highlight this text to make them look foolish

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Damn you! I highlighted it! ~D

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Now I got you back!