Odd newspaper cuttings.

Over the last few years i have collected a huge collection of 5, yes, 5, newspaper articles of interestingly funny things. For your entertainment, here they are:

Villagers flee disco from outer space

Sudden panic swept a village when bright, coloured lights appeared in the distant sky. It could mean only one thing - an invasion aliens from outer space. Everybody fled and within minutes the Eastern Romanian village of Cristinesti was deserted.
But police who were called out to investigated soon put pai to the panic. The found the light show was coming from a nearby town...at an open-air disco.
The villagers were eventually persuaded to go home. One, Costel Roman, said: 'Everybody was out on the streets, wondering what to do. We were terrified.'

If at first you don't succeed...

The Cubans who tried but failed to sail to the US in a converted vintage Chevrolet truck have tried again, this time in a tail-finned Buick.
Undaunted by last summer's setback, Marciel Basanta Lopez and Luis Gras Rodriguez set out for the Florida keys with a crew of nine, including their wives and children on the improvised craft. 'My cousin isn't crazy. He wants to be free,' said Kiriat Lopez in the US.
The adventurers were sent back to Cuba last July when their 1951 floating Chevrolet, floating on steel-drums and powered by home-made propellors, was stopped by the US coast guard.
The Coast Guard later sank it with machine gun fire. A senior officer said it was sunk to ensure it did not become 'a monument'. The six adults and five children were said to have locked themselves inside the 1959 Buick when it was spotted by a helicopter.
'This time they have experience,' Kiriat Lopez said. 'They don't plan on going anywhere. Except here.'
Last night however, the Buick was said to have been stopped about 10 miles from Florida and its crew was being sent back to Cuba.

We love the Iraqi information minister!

With his wry smirk and outrageous denials, he was an unintentional star of the war. Now Iraqi Information Minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf has had a website dedicated to him. The site - www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com - features some of his most memorable quotes. Among them are 'The Infidels are commiting suicide by the hundred on the gates of Baghdad' - said of US troops as they moved into the capital. The minister has since disappeared.

Most amount of 'had' in one sentence

John, where Peter had had 'had had', had had 'had'. Had 'had had' been John's answer, then he would have been correct!!

Monkeys taught to spend and gamble

City traders and shoppers may be guilty of behaving a bit like animals when it comes to parting with cash.
There may be a good reason, say economists, who taught monkeys to spend and gamble - and found they behaved just like people.
Five tufted capuchins were each given a budget of 12 coins. One researcher then played shop assistant to 'sell' grapes while another sold jelly cubes, both for a coin each.
The monkeys quickly learnt how to exchange money for food but the Harvard economists then dropped the price of jelly cubes to two cubes for a coin.
The capuchins bought more jelly and fewer grapes, just like people would in that situation. Researcher Keith Chen also taught the monkeys to gamble with grapes, but they also showed the same reluctance to losing as stock market nvestors.
'Our results indicate that loss-averse behaviour is not confined to humans but is present in our closest evolutionary neighbours,' said Mr Chen.
The monkeys' similarities to people was further demonstrated - when one of them started stealing from the researchers and they had to give it food to get the coins back.