The Fate of the Archangel [Chapter I]

(No major changes except that the text setup has changed)

The Fate of the Archangel

Book 1


Chapter I

The fog was calmly rising in the ruins of the Hil Alor temple. Far, far away in the Vepcisian lands, Sergeant Leckorn was discussing with his captain.

-“Where do you think they will attack next, captain?
-I don’t know… (the man hesitated) they can come from everywhere…
-Yeah, I know… last time, they even attacked by the sewers! Fortunately, we had time to position the cannon to send a nice grapeshot into the mass of Suldurians…
-These demons never give up, do they?
-‘Can’t know, captain… It seems there are always more and more warriors who come to fight us… One day, we’ll have to leave the lower town to reach the upper town… If we don’t get reinforced soon, we’ll have to retreat, that’s certain!
-Anyway… sarge, prepare the men… We must reinforce the Salo Tan Citadel…
-Where’s the lieutenant?
-He died yesterday… Pollius has been named lieutenant, but he’s fighting in the sewers right now…
-Okay, I’ll take 30 men.
-Carry on. Meet at the gate.”

Leckorn ran to a ruined part of the temple. He made quick signs and whispered some orders to his men. His men took their mail coats, their swords, their long bows, their rusted helmet, their rectangular large shields, and sneaked silently with a remarkable stealth between the destroyed columns, barricades, wooden stakes, wooden barriers, the walls of bricks tinted with a dark green moisture… The sound of the “cling” “cling” of the mail coats lightly grazing the shields was the only noise heard. The sergeant reached the gates of the temple. The Eldar captain was waiting for him with some Eldar rangers. About 20 of them were already ready for action. Leckorn’s section was composed of humans (which are a bit better in close combat than the Eldars… Though, the Eldars are expert archers). Leckorn was a veteran since a long time… He still remembers when he arrived to the ruins of the lower town at the age of 17… Young, inexperienced… He rapidly realized that war was an horrible thing… But he had grown up in a world of war, a world of terror where he fell in deep admiration with the strength and might of his people, having fought for hundreds and hundreds of years… He kept fighting until he reached the age of 34 (which is his actual age). He had seen so much young soldiers like he once was dying, screaming… screaming… and screaming…

Each night, he heard again and again the screams of his friends being slaughtered by the Suldurians… He heard again the sound of the cannons, desperately releasing so much shells and cannonballs that sometimes the cannons had to be cooled down with water before it melted. He heard again the sound of the thousands of grenades he threw, remembering the distinct sound of the explosion, and the flesh flying apart. His culture had a mix of modernity and of traditions… The soldiers used bows, swords, and spears, while they also used grenades and cannons, weapons acquired with the recent discovery of gun powder. The soldiers wore mail coats and iron helmets.

The Captain was an Eldar. He was tall and slim, but his skills with a blade were unmatched. The soldiers were glad to follow him as he wasn’t the kind of officer who stays behind and gives orders…

The 52 soldiers ran still as silently as ever through the ruins and reached a large ladder. They climbed it and hopped on the stone wall. They went through an old destroyed tower, climbed another ladder, reached a large trench filled with wooden stakes… and finally reached what they were looking for… but they were too late… The men they were supposed to reinforce were already fighting as the noise of combats reached their ears. The Captain yelled at his men to take up their bows. He also ordered Leckorn to get into the Citadel at all costs before the 2 sections went into the temple. The trenches were dangerously covering the trenches, so the scene was hidden from them. Leckorn nodded and brought 10 men with him. He ran on the wooden footbridge over the trenches and met up with other soldiers. He yelled “The way’s clear, come on!” and the Captain rapidly joined him. Leckorn said:

-“What’s the situation? What’s going on?
-We just repulsed a Suldurian attack… You came just in time, sergeant…” answered the other soldier. “Unfortunately, we’re lacking of cannonballs… Come with me, I’ll show you the way to the Main Place.”

The Captain and his men followed the other Vepcisian soldiers to the Main Place (also called Place-of-Arms)… The Citadel was divided in 3 sections: The Gateway, the Main Place, and the Bastion. The Bastion was the fortified part of the citadel, as it was an artificially made plateau fortified with an incredible ability. The walls were thick and almost not attackable. Though, the Suldurian gargoyles were still as deadly as ever. The best place to fight wasn’t the gateway (as the walls around it were breached to several places), it was the Place-of-Arms, as this was a large place… the perfect terrain for an effective defence with some cannons. Leckorn was disgusted to see soldiers and Suldurians lying down on the paved place… lying dead forever. The last combat was probably more deadly than he had expected… The Main Place was fortified with trenches, and the whole place was fortified with wooden stakes. Some strategic points (as the breaches in the walls or the gateway) were fortified with these large wooden stakes. These years of war transformed these once peaceful cities in permanent fortresses… Each street was fortified, there were trenches everywhere, there were bodies constantly lying down in the houses… Some rivers were separating the city in different sectors, but these rivers were turning to red… with the thousands of bodies that sank in it… The city of Flemiria was more chaotic than a battlefield… it had become Hell itself.

The leader of the Citadel defenders was a human lieutenant called Websoth. He warmly greeted his reinforcements, and assigned some positions to Lemir’s men (the name of the Eldar Captain)

-“Captain, do you hear them?
-Yes, Leckorn… I hear them… Get to the trenches… And ask Jalus to put the cannons in place. Also ask him to place the mobile artillery pieces on the Bastion wall.
-Yes, Captain…”

Leckorn reached the men hidden in the trenches near the Gateway. “Be silent, men… silent like… (he hesitated for a second) like Death itself.” There was silence for a minute… and then…

The screams began.

Chapter II

“FIRE!” yelled Websoth!

The Suldurians mounting gargoyles flew in the dark sky as crows waiting for an agonizing animal. The gargoyles screamed with their terrible wrath that made each soldier panic the first time they fought them. Leckorn remembered…

“I remember… the first time I met the gargoyles… I remember… their screams… I remember… their agility and their swiftness… I remember… my hands shaking on my bow string… I remember, having missed “them” the first time I shot with my bow… I remember… the incredible pain you feel when their claws hits you and tears apart your mail coat, and a piece of your flesh… I remember… seeing my friends around me, watching me falling on the ground, spilling my blood on the hard ground. I remember… their screams of terror… that they released when they saw me almost dying… And after, they all died… one after the other… during constant years of wars…”

But this time, Leckorn was used to war. He was calm and knew that one day or another he would die… but why not make the enemy pay before death takes your life away? The soldiers took their bows and released a volley of numerous sharpened arrows. Several gargoyles were pierced by arrows as their lifeless body fell with an incredible speed. Several gargoyles crashed hard on the soil and some even fell in the trenches. Though, the soldiers’ shields protected them well. Other gargoyles dived in the air and crashed on some soldiers, hitting them fiercely with their deadly claws. Other gargoyles were mounted by Suldurian mages. The mages threw some black rocks covered with some mysterious powder… Several of these stones were thrown and the only contact these rocks ever had with the ground ended in terrible explosions. The Vepcisians hid themselves in the trenches and kept shooting at the numerous gargoyles flying in the skies. Jalus, the Artillery Commander, ordered his men to place the Anti-Air cannons. Each of these cannons were loaded with pointed cannonballs (longer and less wide cannonballs to allow a better “penetration” through the air) which were really smaller than the original cannonballs. These “Anti-Air” cannonballs were put in a large belt containing 20 of these Anti-Air shells. With a great mechanism, the Anti-Air cannons could fire at an interval of 1 “missile” per 3 seconds and took at least 1 full minute to be reloaded. Jalus ordered a corporal to get on the Anti-Air cannon and gave him precise orders where to shoot.

“3 cranks, Morth! 3 cranks! Okay! Aim at 4 and 6! 4 and 6!”
The soldier, with a remarkable dexterity, manoeuvred the machine with a great rapidity to the wished angle. After, another soldier at his right pulled on a thick rope at an interval of 3 seconds, the exact time for another shot to be fired. The missiles took down several gargoyles as the corporal Morth kept aiming at the gargoyles with a moving fire. After a certain lap of time, the ammunition belt was empty. “RELOAD, Tenk! RELOAD!”

While, other Suldurian soldiers on foot charged through the destroyed gateway. The Suldurian leader ran as fast as he could to reach the trenches. Some arrows wiped out some of his soldiers, but he had soldiers in abundance. But, cannonballs went with an incredible speed 3 inches near him and crashed on the ground, exploding a few meters away from him. Several bodies flew over him and landed pretty much anywhere on the ground. Other cannonballs whistled around him, but he kept going forward. Lemir, on his side, took his spear and threw it at the Suldurian leader. The spear went through the surprisingly hard armour and blood fell on the ground with the body being propelled a few meters back. Websoth took his double-handed sword and didn’t hesitate to thrown himself in the melee. Sergeant Leckorn charged out of the trenches, followed by the courageous and outnumbered Vepcisian soldiers. Explosions around him propelled him back in the trenches. The weight of his mail coat made gave him a great shock and he almost lost his breath. He quickly got up and followed the last soldiers leaving the trenches to join the melee.

Leckorn saw several bodies of his brothers-in-arms being tore apart by the “dark stones” (also called “Black Booms” by the veterans) and saw that the offensive was more costly than he had expected… He saw the brave Websoth cutting apart a Suldurian footmen and saw the sword, with the swiftness of the wind, parrying another hit from a Suldurian scimitar. The ground was covered with blood as the combat was raging. Lemir sliced a hand of a Suldurian soldier as this soldier was going to thrust his claws (a special weapon of the Sulrurians. On a glove were nailed up claws of dead gargoyles… perfectly matching with the common shape of the Suldurian twisted hands, these weapons rarely needed adjustments. Sharp and hard, these weapons were perfect for stealth attacks… killing without warning the enemy of your presence…) in his back, but Lemir had the good reflex to crouch, to turn back and to swing his sword at his enemy. The sword hit the hand and the Sulrurian ran for his life as fast as the rest of his strengths allowed him to. The other Vepcisian soldiers roared as they fought their way to the gateway. The Bastion held firm, even if some gargoyles tried to attack the high ramparts. The gargoyles who tried to kill some gunners were rapidly taken down by some of the most skilled Eldar archers protecting their only REAL effective defence against aerial attacks. Some of the archers left in the trenches kept sending their arrows to take down as much gargoyles as possible. With a bit of luck, the gargoyles would abandon the combat and the infantry would follow.

The Gargoyles flew away from the Citadel and the infantry rapidly reached the trenches. The Vepcisians quickly fell back to the Bastion gate. They entered as fast as possible through the dark iron gate, but strangely they didn’t close the door. The Suldurians massively went into the narrow entrance, but most of them died as a heavy hail of bullets hit the compact mass of soldiers. The Vepcisians cheered as they pursued their retreating enemy. Websoth, despite the heavy casualties his men suffered, was happy that he could at least drive the Suldurians back. His men would at least have more confidence in him! Fortunately, most of the “casualties” were composed of “wounded soldiers”. One man out of 6 were killed and 3 men out of 6 were lightly or heavily wounded. Captain Lemir wasn’t wounded during the battle, Leckorn got his left arm broken during the battle, Websoth got wounded to the forehead (a claw slashed his nose and his forehead, drawing a large scar on his face) and Jalus got almost killed during the battle, being thrown down the Bastion by a gargoyle who unluckily grabbed him and threw him down. Though, he luckily survived, with only a few ribs cracked. His heavily plated armour saved his life.

Leckorn thrust his sword in a few Suldurian bodies to make sure that they were dead once and for all. A few moments after, Lemir asked him to bring 20 men with him and to join Lieutenant Pollius into the sewers to see where he was in his fight in the sewers. If possible, Leckorn was asked to help Pollius and his men to reach a certain “place” determined by Pollius himself and the High Commandment. Leckorn grinned as one of his friends came to see him.

-“Sarge, what’s the matter here?
-My dear Uselk… Despite your rank of Corporal, you must learn not to mind business of your superiors. When they tell you to go to a place, you listen to him and you usually find the best way to die in these kinds of mission. I need men who are used of running fast with a good stealth…
-I’ll come, Sarge. I won’t let you down, Sarge.
-Really? That’s nice from you… Go take about 20 of the best men here and ask them to be ready in an hour.
-Sure, Sarge. I like being your slave, Sergeant!”

Both friends laughed as it reminded them the times where their first Captain was a real dictator… 20 men were chosen by Uselk and an hour they reached the rusted sewers trap. The difficulty in this kind of terrain was that the sewers were really elaborated, and were so vast that any man could easily get lost in a few minutes. Though, Uselk had fought for a whole year in these sewers… and he nearly knew perfectly the lower city sewers…

Leckorn slowly approached near the sewers trap… He looked right and left, and jumped in the disgusting sewers with some kind of primitive parachute (as there were no more than 4 or 5 ladders in the whole city to access the sewers without falling flat on the floor… in a place where the surface of the world was 30 meters up you). His friends knew that they could easily get lost in the darkness… and they had full confidence in their leader. Uselk gave a last look at the grey sky, and he jumped in the abysses, hoping that his parachute would open in time.

But, far from the carnages and heroic wars going on in the Vepcisian lands, a proud people had decided to unite once and for all their divided kingdom… The Parmeonian King Polyön II had just decided to unite his country… to be able to see… what was standing beyond Mount Kohrill… But for this, he had to make a dangerous choice… putting down the walls of the Independent City-States…

Far away in Nel Parmeo, King Polyön II was about to begin to accomplish the fate of his nation.

[Special Informations on Factions “Vepcisian and Suldurian Empires]
[[[-Tales of the 2 Empires-

Sources: Tales from the East

East of Mount Kohrill lie vast and dangerous lands… Lands with poor soil, lands where the ground is constantly dry, dusty and cold. Lands… where even the rats don’t want to live, as they could easily be hunted for food. Depleted lands, the lonely lands of Rekiarsm are divided in 2 distinct factions: The Vepcisian and the Suldurian Empires. 2 empires fighting against each other since the world is world.

The Suldurian Empire, founded by Xionus, a powerful vampire whose spirit was twisted by years of studying Alchemy books. Vampires are creatures with a relatively pale skin. Contrary to local legends, the vampires do not feed themselves of blood. They are simply creatures born in the night, living in caves. The gigantic city called “Ageon”, the Suldurian capital, is a gigantic city built with an oriental style. Particular style indeed… The Suldurians’ name come from Suldur, the 15th leader of the vampires. With several wars (enumerated later on in the text) and bloody campaigns, he succeeded to unite his people. The Empire was born. Several armies were formed, as the Suldurians know instinctively how to fight. Living together with the gargoyles, the Suldurians succeeded to become a fabulously effective military power. Spreading terror in the ranks of their enemies, the Suldurian warriors mounting the gargoyles are some of the deadliest creatures that ever fought in the world. Though, the gargoyles are few in number and prefer to live a peaceful live. The Suldurians use claws and can cause the enemy’s armies to run away in fear. Though, the brave Vepcisians fought them for centuries. The Suldurian society is not really complex… A new Emperor is made until his reign ends by his death of his resignation. The Suldurian Empire is vast and has never been conquered, as its only enemy is the Vepcisian Empire, which is too weak to launch a successful attack.

The Suldurian and Vepcisian Empires are like white and black, light and darkness… 2 different sides of a single coin. The Vepcisian Empire is a regrouping of Humans and Eldars (elves). In 789, the 2 people decided to unite themselves together to form a Confederation, known as the Confederation of Vernion. Vernion was an Eldar King. With the human King Brackium, Vernion created a permanent army to defend their territories against the Suldurians. The capital of the Confederation of Vernion, Lef Koradon, was then besieged by the Suldurians. With a great courage, the people of the Confederation took their weapons and formed one of the greatest armies that walked on this earth. Brackium died during the battle, killed by a gargoyle which tore his body apart. Vernion survived the battle and won the battle. Vernion married Brackium’s daughter after the war, and from this union was born Vepcis. Vepcis was one of the first half-blood Eldar. After his father’s death during a war far in the West, Vepcis made himself Emperor. He created several armies and greatly developed the cities and the Vepcisian culture.

One day, Vepcis received a message: a city was attacked by the Suldurians. He arrived with 3 armies. The battle was hard, but the Vepcisian won. A bit before the battle ended, Vepcis saw the Suldurian general, which was called Suldur. They fought bravely each other until Vepcis got frozen by a magical spell of Suldur. Suldur escaped with the rest of his army, while the Vepcisian soldiers cried, seeing their greatest King being frozen forever. Alchemists and the Eldars’ magic didn’t help anything… Vepcis was frozen... forever. The Vepcisians never chose another Emperor, in honour of Vepcis the Frozen. His body was hidden to an unknown place, and the Eldar and Human generals created the greatest network of trenches, barricades, walls, fortresses, known as the “Fendel Barrier”. This battlefield takes about 2/5 of the total surface area of the Vepcisian Empire and protects all major cities. Though, with time, the Suldurian incursions made of the Fendel Barrier a real permanent battlefield. Barricades, walls, trenches, artificial rivers have been created… anything to stop the Suldurians. With time and the constant raids on the Vepcisian cities, the cities began to fall in ruins. The Vepcisian Empire is totally ruined… There are no beautiful things to see there, except if you consider that war is a beautiful thing. The Generals do their best to protect as best as they can their cities, but they often fail. When they do succeed, the Suldurians always come back. The frontline is large and devastated, as the Empire itself.

Talking about armies, the Suldurians have technological advantages over the Vepcisians. They master the art of Magic, which allows them to use it as they want. They can create catapults with flesh and bones of dead warriors and they can do many other horrible things. The Vepcisians master gunpowder. They use cannons with grapeshot and shells, they also use some mortars (even if there are few in numbers). Though, the arrows of the archers and the swords of the Eldars and Humans are still as effective as they have always been. In the South, the Vepcisians bought some mechanical means of transport: armoured vehicles that don’t even use a horse! These vehicles only use a mysterious liquid that is only sold in Dalan Norr, a lone and unexplored city.

With centuries of constant wars, the Vepcisians feel abandoned… what if a new Vepcis took up the sword and claimed back what belongs to the Eldar and Humans? What if the Vepcisians had still strength to fight the Suldurians? What if… the Suldurians decided to finish this war with their old enemies?]]]

-Map of the Known world
http://www.imagedump.com/index.cgi?pick=get&tp=313324
Source: Archives of Nel Parmeo

Book 2
“Rise of Parmeo”


“The great armies of King Polyön II are some of the most powerful and fearless armies in the known world. Each of these Armies have a sense of total devotion to their King… who has the most privileged place in the Parmeonian politics… but the Oracle has supreme power. Being able to communicate with the “Winded Ones” is a gift from the “Winged God” himself… but can this gift destroy us all?” –Colonel Hoemir of the 3rd Army



Chapter I
In the halls of Nel Parmeo’s Royal Palace, King Polyön II was having a discussion with Nadir Berenus, his Right Hand.

“-I feel that something troubles you, my King…
-The road to the cities to the North and to the West… are now blocked.
-Blocked? How come?
-The Independent City-States… have united themselves once again.
-I knew that they had huge and powerful armies, but I thought they were still fighting between themselves!
-Now that they have united themselves, they now attack the trading convoys, and they are blockading the roads to Nel Parmeo… These cities are going to strangle what Agnor himself had died for!
-I suggest that we mobilize a gigantic army, my King. With good propaganda, hundreds of people will join our ranks, and we will create the deadliest and most powerful army that ever marched in the Parmeonian lands! If Jokrilla, Nefezum and Trondforge fall, the rest of the rebel cities will fall… and then we will be able to dream, my King! We will be able to know what’s going on outside our borders, instead of struggling for our economic prosperity!
-The idea is interesting…
-And no one will stand in our path…
-Hmm…
-What do you think of the idea?
-Call the propaganda Minister…
-With pleasure, my King.”

Nadir knew that the King had made his decision… and he was joyful that he still had this peculiar “influence” on him. At least, the Parmeonians would stand together and unite themselves! And then, an Empire would be born. Conquests, vast unexplored lands to march on… At last, the Parmeonian armies would cross the gates of their cities and attack!

***

Within the next days, the propaganda Minister had done his job. Hundreds and hundreds of civilians had decided to join a newly created army, composed of half of each of the 10 armies and of hundreds of volunteers who would take the arms to vanquish the Independent City-States… Nadir Berenus would lead this army with the King’s permission, and Berenus would be assisted by the famous Colonel Hoemir, who had fought for years against the Targuts. The newly created army was called “The Grand Melken” (which means the Grand Army in Parmeonian language). The Grand Melken was composed of more than 50 000 volunteers, and 20 000 experienced soldiers, which reduced the 10 other armies to half of their initial strengths. In 4 months, the whole army was regrouped, trained and equipped. Nadir Berenus, accompanied of Colonel Hoemir, looked beautiful on his black stallion. Hoemir, on his side, was mounting a standard brown horse instead of one of these magnificent and expensive horses that the generals and officers have. “War isn’t a matter of beauty… it’s more a matter of effectiveness.” thought Hoemir as his horse trotted out of Nel Parmeo’s huge gates… Hoemir was a man disgusted by politics and disgusted of the King himself… He scorned this monarchy his father had given his life for, and he scorned this “future empire” where corruption and traitors were everywhere. He saw no glory in his Kingdom, but he respected his soldiers. He respected Halus the Iron Fist, the leader of the Paladins of the Iron Hand. He also respected his great knights, who were the finest soldiers of all. He was a close friend of Halus as Halus had his same point of view. Halus wasn’t a great soldier who could kill dozens of soldiers by himself, but he was a determined warrior. His Paladins and himself fought for their Order. They fought for the honour of their Order as their values were based on the Oracle’s ones. Halus firmly believed in the mighty God and in his servitors, the Winged Ones… that the Oracle called “Angels”. He wasn’t really reassured as he remembered the recent events that took place in the Public Place a few days ago…

“-Do not go to these lands! Do not break the equilibrium! If you enter the gates of Jokrilla, your lands will be stained with blood… and they will come!” screamed the Oracle.
-Well may they come! Our armies will defeat them whoever they are! We will create the greatest nation! And the world will be ours! Damn this God who told us to stay away! There will be no damn omens who will tell me what is good and what is wrong! I decide what is good for my people!” answered the King.

***

Several days later, the Grand Melken was already a mile away from Trondforge, one of the 3 main rebel cities. The cheers of the Nel Parmeonians were far behind, and the people was already tired of this war… The food destined to the civilians was greatly reduced as most of the food went to the Grand Melken instead of the population. Already, there was more tension in the Throne’s room…

***

Nadir Berenus and the Grand Melken reached the gates of Trondforge… And they were met by an army of 45 000 men. Nadir prepared his men for the first battle of this Grand Army that could change the world.

[Special Infos on Factions]
[[[Faction: Parmeonia (Parmeonian Kingdom)

Sources: The Royal Vault of Nel Parmeo

Main cities:

Nel Parmeo (capital), Lessarium, Vandera, Perdica, Welzassil…

Nel Parmeo: Capital of our Kingdom, Nel Parmeo was founded in 3575 by Agnor I. Compared to Espega, our capital is really younger in appearance. Nel Parmeo has a population of 210 000 people. The huge walls defending this city are thick and are made of marble. Nel Parmeo’s citadel, the Agnorian Citadel (named in the honor of our founder), never fell, like the walls of our city. The city was built on a hill, which gave the inhabitants of Nel Parmeo a strategic advantage over any attackers. Everything of the modern Parmeonian civilization began here. In the South-East of the Parmeonian Kingdom, Nel Parmeo is the city farther from the main cities.

Lessarium: Largest city of the Kingdom, Lessarium is the oldest city of our civilization. In the North-West of the Parmeonian Kingdom, Lessarium is a huge city. Lessarium was founded by Ragnüryon. The first people of Parmeonia fought during years to gain control over this region rich in iron. Once the last native tribes were beaten, Ragnüryon decided to found this city. Lessarium has the 2nd army of Parmeonian Military Forces.

Vandera: Founded in 3765, Vandera is the most known city outside the borders of our lands. Vandera is a city hidden in the swamps in the West of our lands. Vandera is the richest city. Living of the trading of salt (a rare product), exotic plants, expensive and rare medicinal potions, and “mystior”, the best trees to make the best arrows, Vandera is a prosperous city. Guarded by the 7th army, Vandera often had to fight for their mines for their swamps, as it is their main source of salt. Vanderans evaporate the extremely salted waters of the swamps in a special machine, which gives a good salt of quality. The water is released in the swamps after. Vandera has never been conquered by other forces of the Extern World, as the swamps act as a natural barrier.

Perdica: A gigantic fortress-city near Nel Parmeo, Perdica is the main Military base of our Kingdom. The 3rd and 4th armies are in a permanent state of alert, always ready to repulse any attack from the Extern borders. This is the heart of our military power. Built by Nadir the Architect in 4120 after the disastrous War of the Eastern Tribes, Perdica saved Nel Parmeo from being constantly plundered by the Targuts…

Welzassil: To the extreme-north of our borders, Welzassil is the last Parmeonian Bastion between us and the Barbarian Kingdoms of the North. Constantly being repaired and re-built, Welzassil has been one of the few regions conquered by us during the Agnorian times (times during the foundation of our capital). With terrible casualties, Lepsyo Athol and his men succeeded to take this mountain pass and to erect a fortress there in less than 2 years. Constantly being attacked, the construction of the fortress has been difficult and costly. Though, this fortress blocks the Barbarians from further invasions of the Barbarians. Only the best men are sent there, as defending such a fortress is difficult against the savage men of the North. Though, during these last years, our King didn’t decide to restore the crumbling fortress. The fortress begins to deteriorate, and the soldiers of Welzassil are lacking of reinforcements. In Welzassil, the 5th Army fought since years and years. Constantly being modified, supplied with new men, the 5th is the oldest modern army in Parmeonia (after the Agnorian times).

Independent cities: Cities such as Jokrilla, Nefezum, and Trondforge, are in the center of the Parmeonian Kingdom, but they are not considered as Parmeonian cities. In 3872, Ajartil of Jokrilla decided to found a new faction with the ones who would follow him. Other cities rebelled, but their alliance shifted with time. The Parmeonians rapidly sent armies to defeat the rebels, but the 4th and 3rd Army were defeated (and were re-created after). A prophet came in Nel Parmeo and warned that if the Parmeonians only dared to cross the gates of one of these independent cities, a plague would ravage the Parmeonians city… And that if they even crossed the Citadel’s gates, meteors would fall from the sky to devastate the whole world… And that each soldier who would enter the Throne’s room of one of these cities would be sent to hell. The Parmeonians then decided to leave the Independent cities alone, even if they still had a doubt about the prophecy.]]]


Chapter II

Having mentioned several things about the Parmeonian culture, the author did a major mistake: he forgot to mention the religion in Parmeonia…

*Note from the author* This religion is based on a single on the tale of the first of the Oracles. The legend told about Aerinil, the first all-mighty God, who was the Guardian of the World. But, the Angels got betrayed by unknown creatures. So, the Apocalypsia (apocalypse) began. Though, for an unknown reason, the Angels stopped attacking just when they had reached Mount Kohrill. They went back to the Heavens, leaving behind them a parchment with 5 Commandments and a world about to explode. These Commandments would become a model for the Parmeonian society, not born yet in these times (meaning that their ancestors discovered the parchment). The people of the Earth then re-built a new world. The religion became a religion equivalent to Catholicism in a certain epoch (in the real world). Thousands of people were killed because they thought otherwise… which made a world where these Commandments were respected with fear instead of understanding. The Commandments are:
“1. Your God deserves respect. Respect, and obedience.
2. Thou shall kill for your God.
3. Thou shall destroy the “heretics”.
4. Thou shall not steal what belongs to your God, which means everything.
5. Thou shall not go further than the Original Borders of your country. If no, Legions of Heavens and Hell will come to destroy your world… and this time it will be forever.”

There was a 6th statement… “The Portal shall not be opened. He who will enter it will never come back.”
Which Portal does this talk about? No one knows…

Okay… back to the story, now.
***

-Trondforge-

The Grand Melken was already besieging Trondforge since 3 days. There had been little assaults quickly repulsed by the Rebels. The rebel soldiers were trapped in their fortress, but they wouldn’t charge their way out for sure! Sallying forth when outnumbered by the enemy would be a suicide! Unfortunately for Nadir and his men, there were too much technical problems to launch a successful assault.

By the 3rd morning since the siege of Trondforge, Hoemir was probably the man the most realist, knowing that the operations were progressing with a painful slowness. One of Halus’ lieutenants, a bald man in his mid 20s called Selemus, dared to ask his superior what was going on.
-“Colonel Hoemir?
-Yes, lieutenant?
-Why aren’t we attacking?
-The cannonballs have still not been delivered yet…
-How come?
-The Ministers are not urging themselves for this war… this war… that the people is already tired of.
-My cousin sent me a letter from Nel Parmeo… He told me that our King had to double the guard in the city, as the population grows more and more dangerous, angry about this war.
-I know… Half of the archers in this army have nothing more but 20 arrows to shoot! The supply chariots are late! This war has been done too hastily… and it wasn’t organized and planned enough for such a great war.
-Let’s hope we can hold the other armies back while we besiege Trondforge… We will get overwhelmed in no time if we don’t attack too soon.”

When he heard this last sentence, Hoemir immediately ran to meet Nadir, which was helping the Artillery Commanders to position their catapults, less effective weapons but they could get stones pretty much everywhere instead of waiting for the supply chariots containing cannonballs and gunpowder.

-“General! General! We must move! Fast!
-Why, my dear Colonel? We will wait for supplies before we attack! That’s simple!
-Noooo, general! Don’t you understand? If we are to fight, let’s fight the other towns before they regroup and overwhelm us! Jokrilla’s army has more than 50 000 soldiers! And Nefezum has more than 40 000 soldiers! If their 2 armies reach each other, our army will not hold! I suggest that we split the army in 2, Milord.
-You mean that an army will continue to besiege Trondforge while the other part attacks the enemy before it regroups? We need the best men for this operation… If this army gets beaten one time, the besieging army will have no choice but to retreat!
-I will lead these men… It’ll give time for the supply convoys to reach the besieging army, to deliver these damn cannonballs that we need so much! Without these cannonballs, our catapults will never be able to break such thick walls of stones! For that, we need more firepower! The best our catapults will do will be to damage the buildings IN the city…
-Okay… Take the men you need and leave me, I’m busy! This will be YOUR operation, this will be YOUR responsibility to lead these men and if you fail, it will be YOUR failure… UNDERSTOOD?
-Yes, General.” answered back Hoemir with a bitter tone.

Hoemir ran to meet his Captains to rally 30 000 of the volunteer soldiers and 12 000 of the experienced soldiers. He also asked Halus and his 500 Paladins to join him, and Halus gladly accepted with one of his authentic laughs. And in the next hours, the Grand Melken was separated in 2, and Hoemir was heading to Nefezum, south of Trondforge.

***

[Special Infos on Factions (Parmeonia)]
[[[People:

The people of Parmeonia are humans. People have a great diversity of appearances. People have either white skin, black skin, dark white skin, tanned skin (in the regions of South)… Parmeonians are proud of their nation and any offence is sure to be answered by an army. The walls of marble of Nel Parmeo are a sign of the Parmeonians’ pride… and decadence. Marble is not the hardest material to make a wall… and a potential attack could break the walls without major problems except the Parmeonian armies.

Military History:

Armies: There are 10 Armies in the Parmeonian Kingdom. Though, the territory is large and it is difficult for the armies to cover every area. Armies are generally concentrated in cities or fortresses. The 1st Army, the Royal Army, created in 3575 (foundation of Nel Parmeo) is a permanent army garrisoned in Nel Parmeo. The leader of this army is the King himself (Polyön II) and the King’s Right Hand (honorific title. The King’s Right Hand title is given to the best Parmeonian general), Nadir Berenus. The soldiers of this army wear ancient armours, use ancient weapons of the Agnorian epoch. They use long curved blades as swords and these blades can also be used as spears. The shields are rectangular (4 times higher than the width of the shield). The helmets are generally iron helmet with 3 holes delicately curved in: 2 holes for the eyes and 1 hole for the mouth. The armours are solid and the mail coats are definitely an epic addition to the Royal Army. The 2nd army (led by Kor Lindus, a new-blood general), stationed at Lessarium, is a new army. Recently created, this army has the youngest soldiers under its banners. The soldiers of Lessarium have the finest swords, but the 2nd army is especially famous for its Paladins of the Iron Hand. The finest mounted knights are trained since their childhood to be part of the Iron Hand regiment. The 3rd and 4th armies (commanded by Narub Trenus and Satcha Beg) are stationed in the Fortress of Perdica. The finest men are in these 2 famous armies who repulsed several times incursions from the Targuts of the East. Used to fight with an oriental style, these 2 armies are often helped by the 8th, 9th and 10th Armies… These 3 other armies are armies of the Militia. Smaller armies, but these men know perfectly their territory. In case of an invasion, the Militias can take care of the attackers with their superior strategic tactics. The leader of the Militias is an old Prince named “Marfirius Agnorium”… Some say he’s a descendant of Agnor himself… The 6th Army, led by Prince Apollodrus himself, is an army of veterans. They often fight with the glorious 5th Army at Welzassil (led by Herkul Hepidros), as Prince Apollodrus’ domain is a near the Mountain pass. Finally, an army of regulars is stationed at Vandera, the 7th one.

History: There is not much known before 3575 (foundation of Nel Parmeo). Few texts mention of Ragnüryon and first people of Parmeonia, but not much. In 4115 a disastrous war between Nel Parmeo and the Eastern Tribes devastated the Parmeonian lands. The Targuts of the East. After the defeat at Lake Yuspir, the men of Perdica saved the day at the battle of Menergon Hill. After this battle, the Parmeonians decided to become a great military power. Luckily, except the Barbarian incursions to the North, there were no more wars after. In 4237, the Suldurian Empire to the South of the Parmeonian Kingdom sent an army to conquer Vandera. Fortunately, the Militias of the 8th Army helped the army of Vandera to repulse the attackers. For Vandera, this war had cost a chance to become an independent city-state (independent from Parmeonian influence) as their army was tore apart on the battlefield of the swamps.

Geography: The Parmeonian Kingdom is at the west of Mount Kohrill (center of the known world). The Kingdom is large and extended, but the Suldurian Empire to the south is threatening. The Targuts of the East (Between Parmeonia and Mount Kohrill) share the eastern border. To the North are the Barbarian Kingdoms… but the map is incomplete due to the hostile relations with this People of the North. To the West of our Kingdom is the Great Ocean… the large sea… an unexplored region though.

Politics:

Parmeonia’s political system is based on monarchy.]]]

oh damn I love so lot the 0 comments I got! YEAHHHHHHH!
:furious3: ~:handball:

The screams began.

Chapter II

“FIRE!” yelled Websoth!

The Suldurians mounting gargoyles flew in the dark sky as crows waiting for an agonizing animal. The gargoyles screamed with their terrible wrath that made each soldier panic the first time they fought them. Leckorn remembered…

“I remember… the first time I met the gargoyles… I remember… their screams… I remember… their agility and their swiftness… I remember… my hands shaking on my bow string… I remember, having missed “them” the first time I shot with my bow… I remember… the incredible pain you feel when their claws hits you and tears apart your mail coat, and a piece of your flesh… I remember… seeing my friends around me, watching me falling on the ground, spilling my blood on the hard ground. I remember… their screams of terror… that they released when they saw me almost dying… And after, they all died… one after the other… during constant years of wars…”

But this time, Leckorn was used to war. He was calm and new that one day or another he would die… but why not make the enemy pay before death takes your life away? The soldiers took their bows and released a volley of numerous sharpened arrows. Several gargoyles were pierced by arrows as their lifeless body fell with an incredible speed. Several gargoyles crashed hard on the soil and some even fell in the trenches. Though, the soldiers’ shields protected them well. Other gargoyles dived in the air and crashed on some soldiers, hitting them fiercely with their deadly claws. Other gargoyles were mounted by Suldurian mages. The mages threw some black rocks covered with some mysterious powder… Several of these stones were thrown and the only contact these rocks ever had with the ground ended in terrible explosions. The Vepcisians hid themselves in the trenches and kept shooting at the numerous gargoyles flying in the skies. Jalus, the Artillery Commander, ordered his men to place the Anti-Air cannons. Each of these cannons were loaded with pointed cannonballs (longer and less wide cannonballs to allow a better “penetration” through the air) which were really smaller than the original cannonballs. These “Anti-Air” cannonballs were put in a large belt containing 20 of these Anti-Air shells. With a great mechanism, the Anti-Air cannons could fire at an interval of 1 “missile” per 3 seconds and took at least 1 full minute to be reloaded. Jalus ordered a corporal to get on the Anti-Air cannon and gave him precise orders where to shoot.

“3 cranks, Morth! 3 cranks! Okay! Aim at 4 and 6! 4 and 6!”
The soldier, with a remarkable dexterity, manoeuvred the machine with a great rapidity to the wished angle. After, another soldier at his right pulled on a thick rope at an interval of 3 seconds, the exact time for another shot to be fired. The missiles took down several gargoyles as the corporal Morth kept aiming at the gargoyles with a moving fire. After a certain lap of time, the ammunition belt was empty. “RELOAD, Tenk! RELOAD!”

While, other Suldurian soldiers on foot charged through the destroyed gateway. The Suldurian leader ran as fast as he could to reach the trenches. Some arrows wiped out some of his soldiers, but he had soldiers in abundance. But, cannonballs went with an incredible speed 3 inches near him and crashed on the ground, exploding a few meters away from him. Several bodies flew over him and landed pretty much anywhere on the ground. Other cannonballs whistled around him, but he kept going forward. Lemir, on his side, took his spear and threw it at the Suldurian leader. The spear went through the surprisingly hard armour and blood fell on the ground with the body being propelled a few meters back. Websoth took his double-handed sword and didn’t hesitate to thrown himself in the melee. Sergeant Leckorn charged out of the trenches, followed by the courageous and outnumbered Vepcisian soldiers. Explosions around him propelled him back in the trenches. The weight of his mail coat made gave him a great shock and he almost lost his breath. He quickly got up and followed the last soldiers leaving the trenches to join the melee.

Leckorn saw several bodies of his brothers-in-arms being tore apart by the “dark stones” (also called “Black Booms” by the veterans) and saw that the offensive was more costly than he had expected… He saw the brave Websoth cutting apart a Suldurian footmen and saw the sword, with the swiftness of the wind, parrying another hit from a Suldurian simitar. The ground was covered with blood as the combat was raging. Lemir sliced a hand of a Suldurian soldier as this soldier was going to thrust his claws (a special weapon of the Sulrurians. On a glove were nailed up claws of dead gargoyles… perfectly matching with the common shape of the Suldurian twisted hands, these weapons rarely needed adjustments. Sharp and hard, these weapons were perfect for stealth attacks… killing without warning the enemy of your presence…) in his back, but Lemir had the good reflex to crouch, to turn back and to swing his sword at his enemy. The sword hit the hand and the Sulrurian ran for his life as fast as the rest of his strengths allowed him to. The other Vepcisian soldiers roared as they fought their way to the gateway. The Bastion held firm, even if some gargoyles tried to attack the high ramparts. The gargoyles who tried to kill some gunners were rapidly taken down by some of the most skilled Eldar archers protecting their only REAL effective defence against aerial attacks. Some of the archers left in the trenches kept sending their arrows to take down as much gargoyles as possible. With a bit of luck, the gargoyles would abandon the combat and the infantry would follow.

The Gargoyles flew away from the Citadel and the infantry rapidly reached the trenches. The Vepcisians quickly felled back to the Bastion gate. They entered as fast as possible through the dark iron gate, but strangely they didn’t close the door. The Suldurians massively went into the narrow entrance, but most of them died as a heavy hail of bullets hit the compact mass of soldiers. The Vepcisians cheered as they pursued their retreating enemy. Websoth, despite the heavy casualties his men suffered, was happy that he could at least drive the Suldurians back. His men would at least have more confidence in him! Fortunately, most of the “casualties” were composed of “wounded soldiers”. One man out of 6 were killed and 3 men out of 6 were lightly or heavily wounded. Captain Lemir wasn’t wounded during the battle, Leckorn got his left arm broken during the battle, Websoth got wounded to the forehead (a claw slashed his nose and his forehead, drawing a large scar on his face) and Jalus got almost killed during the battle, being thrown down the Bastion by a gargoyle who unluckily grabbed him and threw him down. Though, he luckily survived, with only a few ribs cracked. His heavily plated armour saved his life.

Leckorn thrust his sword in a few Suldurian bodies to make sure that they were dead once and for all. A few moments after, Lemir asked him to bring 20 men with him and to join Lieutenant Pollius into the sewers to see where he was in his fight in the sewers. If possible, Leckorn was asked to help Pollius and his men to reach a certain “place” determined by Pollius himself and the High Commandment. Leckorn grinned as one of his friends came to see him.

-“Sarge, what’s the matter here?
-My dear Uselk… Despite your rank of Corporal, you must learn not to mind business of your superiors. When they tell you to go to a place, you listen to him and you usually find the best way to die in these kinds of mission. I need men who are used of running fast with a good stealth…
-I’ll come, Sarge. I won’t let you down, Sarge.
-Really? That’s nice from you… Go take about 20 of the best men here and ask them to be ready in an hour.
-Sure, Sarge. I like being your slave, Sergeant!”

Both friends laughed as it reminded them the times where their first Captain was a real dictator… 20 men were chosen by Uselk and an hour they reached the rusted sewers trap. The difficulty in this kind of terrain was that the sewers were really elaborated, and were so vast that any man could easily get lost in a few minutes. Though, Uselk had fought for a whole year in these sewers… and he nearly knew perfectly the lower city sewers…

Leckorn slowly approached near the sewers trap… He looked right and left, and jumped in the disgusting sewers with some kind of primitive parachute (as there were no more than 4 or 5 ladders in the whole city to access the sewers without falling flat on the floor… in a place where the surface of the world was 30 meters up you). His friends knew that they could easily get lost in the darkness… and they had full confidence in their leader. Uselk gave a last look at the grey sky, and he jumped in the abysses, hoping that his parachute would open in time.

But, far from the carnages and heroic wars going on in the Vepcisian lands, a proud people had decided to unite once and for all their divided kingdom… The Parmeonian King Polyön II had just decided to unite his country… to be able to see… what was standing beyond Mount Kohrill… But for this, he had to make a dangerous choice… putting down the walls of the Independent City-States…

Far away in Nel Parmeo, King Polyön II was about to begin to accomplish the fate of his nation.

Hey man what's up? It's AlexandertheGreat.

I'll post my Rome story here soon.

whew! glad to see ya! Anyway I hope u'll enjoy this story.... and I also hope to enjoy urs! ~:cheers:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Greek Phalanx

oh damn I love so lot the 0 comments I got!

---

Sorry, but you gave me an awfull lot of text to digest.

I am very impressed by the amount of background you provide: this story could become an epic. Unfortunatly, I think you are a bit too much focused on background and not on a fluent story. You stop in the middle of a battle to explain a Suldurian weapon in detail, but introduce the characters in an offhand way.

But I do look forward to reading more about this war. Please continue ~:thumb: .

yeah u may be right, indeed. I agree that I focus a bit too much on background... but I had some difficulties to start up the story. I made the Factions descriptions at the beginning, and my first plan was to shoot ALL of the faction descriptions at the beginning... but then I realized that it would be too boring... so I only gave the 3 main factions in the First Book that will be described... but now the story will really go and action will take place. Now, my set up is done and I'll begin the REAL writing. ~;)

I just put up Chapter2 in my Rome book on Jonny's site.

Book 2
“Rise of Parmeo”


“The great armies of King Polyön II are some of the most powerful and fearless armies in the known world. Each of these Armies have a sense of total devotion to their King… who has the most privileged place in the Parmeonian politics… but the Oracle has supreme power. Being able to communicate with the “Winded Ones” is a gift from the “Winged God” himself… but can this gift destroy us all?” –Colonel Hoemir of the 3rd Army

Chapter I
In the halls of Nel Parmeo’s Royal Palace, King Polyön II was having a discussion with Nadir Berenus, his Right Hand.

“-I feel that something troubles you, my King…
-The road to the cities to the North and to the West… are now blocked.
-Blocked? How come?
-The Independent City-States… have united themselves once again.
-I knew that they had huge and powerful armies, but I thought they were still fighting between themselves!
-Now that they have united themselves, they now attack the trading convoys, and they are blockading the roads to Nel Parmeo… These cities are going to strangle what Agnor himself had died for!
-I suggest that we mobilize a gigantic army, my King. With good propaganda, hundreds of people will join our ranks, and we will create the deadliest and most powerful army that ever marched in the Parmeonian lands! If Jokrilla, Nefezum and Trondforge fall, the rest of the rebel cities will fall… and then we will be able to dream, my King! We will be able to know what’s going on outside our borders, instead of struggling for our economic prosperity!
-The idea is interesting…
-And no one will stand in our path…
-Hmm…
-What do you think of the idea?
-Call the propaganda Minister…
-With pleasure, my King.”

Nadir knew that the King had made his decision… and he was joyful that he still had this peculiar “influence” on him. At least, the Parmeonians would stand together and unite themselves! And then, an Empire would be born. Conquests, vast unexplored lands to march on… At last, the Parmeonian armies would cross the gates of their cities and attack!

***

Within the next days, the propaganda Minister had done his job. Hundreds and hundreds of civilians had decided to join a newly created army, composed of half of each of the 10 armies and of hundreds of volunteers who would take the arms to vanquish the Independent City-States… Nadir Berenus would lead this army with the King’s permission, and Berenus would be assisted by the famous Colonel Hoemir, who had fought for years against the Targuts. The newly created army was called “The Grand Melken” (which means the Grand Army in Parmeonian language). The Grand Melken was composed of more than 50 000 volunteers, and 20 000 experienced soldiers, which reduced the 10 other armies to half of their initial strengths. In 4 months, the whole army was regrouped, trained and equipped. Nadir Berenus, accompanied of Colonel Hoemir, looked beautiful on his black stallion. Hoemir, on his side, was mounting a standard brown horse instead of one of these magnificent and expensive horses that the generals and officers have. “War isn’t a matter of beauty… it’s more a matter of effectiveness.” thought Hoemir as his horse trotted out of Nel Parmeo’s huge gates… Hoemir was a man disgusted by politics and disgusted of the King himself… He scorned this monarchy his father had given his life for, and he scorned this “future empire” where corruption and traitors were everywhere. He saw no glory in his Kingdom, but he respected his soldiers. He respected Halus the Iron Fist, the leader of the Paladins of the Iron Hand. He also respected his great knights, who were the finest soldiers of all. He was a close friend of Halus as Halus had his same point of view. Halus wasn’t a great soldier who could kill dozens of soldiers by himself, but he was a determined warrior. His Paladins and himself fought for their Order. They fought for the honour of their Order as their values were based on the Oracle’s ones. Halus firmly believed in the mighty God and in his servitors, the Winged Ones… that the Oracle called “Angels”. He wasn’t really reassured as he remembered the recent events that took place in the Public Place a few days ago…

“-Do not go to these lands! Do not break the equilibrium! If you enter the gates of Jokrilla, your lands will be stained with blood… and they will come!” screamed the Oracle.
-Well may they come! Our armies will defeat them whoever they are! We will create the greatest nation! And the world will be ours! Damn this God who told us to stay away! There will be no damn omens who will tell me what is good and what is wrong! I decide what is good for my people!” answered the King.

***

Several days later, the Grand Melken was already a mile away from Trondforge, one of the 3 main rebel cities. The cheers of the Nel Parmeonians were far behind, and the people was already tired of this war… The food destined to the civilians was greatly reduced as most of the food went to the Grand Melken instead of the population. Already, there was more tension in the Throne’s room…

***

Nadir Berenus and the Grand Melken reached the gates of Trondforge… And they were met by an army of 45 000 men. Nadir prepared his men for the first battle of this Grand Army that could change the world.

***
-Map of the Known world
http://www.imagedump.com/index.cgi?pick=get&tp=313324
Source: Archives of Nel Parmeo

Chapter II

Having mentioned several things about the Parmeonian culture, the author did a major mistake: he forgot to mention the religion in Parmeonia…

*Note from the author* This religion is based on a single on the tale of the first of the Oracles. The legend told about Aerinil, the first all-mighty God, who was the Guardian of the World. But, the Angels got betrayed by unknown creatures. So, the Apocalypsia (apocalypse) began. Though, for an unknown reason, the Angels stopped attacking just when they had reached Mount Kohrill. They went back to the Heavens, leaving behind them a parchment with 5 Commandments and a world about to explode. These Commandments would become a model for the Parmeonian society, not born yet in these times (meaning that their ancestors discovered the parchment). The people of the Earth then re-built a new world. The religion became a religion equivalent to Catholicism in a certain epoch (in the real world). Thousands of people were killed because they thought otherwise… which made a world where these Commandments were respected with fear instead of understanding. The Commandments are:
“1. Your God deserves respect. Respect, and obedience.
2. Thou shall kill for your God.
3. Thou shall destroy the “heretics”.
4. Thou shall not steal what belongs to your God, which means everything.
5. Thou shall not go further than the Original Borders of your country. If no, Legions of Heavens and Hell will come to destroy your world… and this time it will be forever.”

There was a 6th statement… “The Portal shall not be opened. He who will enter it will never come back.”
Which Portal does this talk about? No one knows…

Okay… back to the story, now.
***

-Trondforge-

The Grand Melken was already besieging Trondforge since 3 days. There had been little assaults quickly repulsed by the Rebels. The rebel soldiers were trapped in their fortress, but they wouldn’t charge their way out for sure! Sallying forth when outnumbered by the enemy would be a suicide! Unfortunately for Nadir and his men, there were too much technical problems to launch a successful assault.

By the 3rd morning since the siege of Trondforge, Hoemir was probably the man the most realist, knowing that the operations were progressing with a painful slowness. One of Halus’ lieutenants, a bald man in his mid 20s called Selemus, dared to ask his superior what was going on.
-“Colonel Hoemir?
-Yes, lieutenant?
-Why aren’t we attacking?
-The cannonballs have still not been delivered yet…
-How come?
-The Ministers are not urging themselves for this war… this war… that the people is already tired of.
-My cousin sent me a letter from Nel Parmeo… He told me that our King had to double the guard in the city, as the population grows more and more dangerous, angry about this war.
-I know… Half of the archers in this army have nothing more but 20 arrows to shoot! The supply chariots are late! This war has been done too hastily… and it wasn’t organized and planned enough for such a great war.
-Let’s hope we can hold the other armies back while we besiege Trondforge… We will get overwhelmed in no time if we don’t attack too soon.”

When he heard this last sentence, Hoemir immediately ran to meet Nadir, which was helping the Artillery Commanders to position their catapults, less effective weapons but they could get stones pretty much everywhere instead of waiting for the supply chariots containing cannonballs and gunpowder.

-“General! General! We must move! Fast!
-Why, my dear Colonel? We will wait for supplies before we attack! That’s simple!
-Noooo, general! Don’t you understand? If we are to fight, let’s fight the other towns before they regroup and overwhelm us! Jokrilla’s army has more than 50 000 soldiers! And Nefezum has more than 40 000 soldiers! If their 2 armies reach each other, our army will not hold! I suggest that we split the army in 2, Milord.
-You mean that an army will continue to besiege Trondforge while the other part attacks the enemy before it regroups? We need the best men for this operation… If this army gets beaten one time, the besieging army will have no choice but to retreat!
-I will lead these men… It’ll give time for the supply convoys to reach the besieging army, to deliver these damn cannonballs that we need so much! Without these cannonballs, our catapults will never be able to break such thick walls of stones! For that, we need more firepower! The best our catapults will do will be to damage the buildings IN the city…
-Okay… Take the men you need and leave me, I’m busy! This will be YOUR operation, this will be YOUR responsibility to lead these men and if you fail, it will be YOUR failure… UNDERSTOOD?
-Yes, General.” answered back Hoemir with a bitter tone.

Hoemir ran to meet his Captains to rally 30 000 of the volunteer soldiers and 12 000 of the experienced soldiers. He also asked Halus and his 500 Paladins to join him, and Halus gladly accepted with one of his authentic laughs. And in the next hours, the Grand Melken was separated in 2, and Hoemir was heading to Nefezum, south of Trondforge.

What do you guys think that will happen to the Grand Melken (the Grand Army)? What do you think of it? Do you like the way it was created?

On my side I think this army has been really too hastily created, and most of this army is composed of volunteers (which doesn't mean that they have been really trained a lot)... 'makes me think of the Russian Conscipts of WW II... we can easily see that this war wasn't planned and organized at all... Germany prepared itself several years before Hitler could invade Europe... while in a bit more than 4 months they were already going to war! I think you guys are eager (or at least you should be) to see how this war will end... the Rebels can overwhelm the Grand Melken in no time... and their soldiers are trained. yeah.....

1. I think it was to hastily created.
2. The army is not of enough size to take on 40,000 (or 50,000) troops, not to mention the fact that they have only 12,000 experienced troops...

with the wise and experienced councils of Shadow One, I'll re-edit my text to give it a better flow, to be a bit less boring. I'll try to completely re-structure it.

Well, it isn't bad in the story. With bravery and courage and small untrained army is still very good... ~:)

I talk more about the beginning.. I'll try not to give all the boring text at the beginning to make the readin' easier.

Ok ~:)

I have simply put a different setup to the story... please tell me if it's slightly better like that.

Btw I'm workin' on Chapter III, yeah! Great battle ahead!

Look on post 1 to see the reformatted text.

This is indeed better, though I still think you spend a too much words on explaining everything and everyone's actions. But I look forward to more.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Greek Phalanx

What do you guys think that will happen to the Grand Melken (the Grand Army)? What do you think of it? Do you like the way it was created?

---

Creating an army of 70.000 men is logistically almost impossible (even in our world), so I guess it speaks highly of the skills of the organizers that such a thing ever happened. But by the sound of it, their skills only went so far and the supply train is not sufficient.

However, what bothers me more is the fact that to create it a prophesy was ignored. Such things always spell doom in stories. ~;)

I think they may succeed in subduing the rebels, but once they cross the gates of Jokrilla they will be defeated.

well you will see what will happen next chapter about hte prophecy... you will see that the opinion of the Parmeonian People will rapidly change and they will lose interest in this war. And you are right, this war has not been prepared well. They only recruited peasants, or hunters... They have been given weapons and armours and then they have been sent to war. Also, you will see what will happen in the High Society of Parmeonia... something that had already happened in History.

Chapter III

The Minister of War quietly walked in the Halls of Perdica’s citadel. He looked at the list of important people in Parmeonia as he decided to call a Council about the dangerous situation in which the Kingdom was.

“Important People to be invited:

King Polyön II
A generous and noble King issued of the Agnorian lineage. Now, at the year of 4701, he is about 45 years old.

Prince Marfirius Agnorium: leader of the Militias (8th, 9th, and 10th Armies)
Prince Apollodrus: Young prince, leader of the veteran army (6th Army) near Welzassil.
Prince Relus Iassa (Prince of the port-city Iassa)
Prince Hermius: Younger brother of Prince Apollodrus. Great military leader, leader of the Praetoria of Nel Parmeo.

General Nadir Berenus: General of the Royal Army
General Kor Lindus: Leader of the 2nd Army
Halus the Iron Fist: Leader of the Paladins of the Iron Hand
General Narub Trenus: Leader of the 3rd Army
General Satcha Beg: Leader of the 4th Army
General Herkul Hepidros: Leader of the 5th Army
General Iupsus Kalidor: Leader of the 7th Army (Vandera)”

Unfortunately for him, General Nadir, Halus, and Prince Apollodrus were at war, unable to join the meeting. The Minister sighed and decided to find his secretary to write and send the invitations.

***

While, on the Central Battlefront, the situation had got worse for the Grand Melken. Some scouts told Hoemir that the supply convoy was heading to him instead of the besiegers’ army… Hoemir had gotten more and more nervous by each painful hour passing by. His eyes were usually of a dark brown, but now his eyes were slowly turning to grey… His 12 000 experienced men and his 30 000 volunteers were his only way to achieve his complicated plan. Hoemir knew that he could count on the experienced men and Halus’ Order, but he didn’t trust the volunteers… He saw fear in their eyes… the fear that everyone has before his first combat. This so hated but reassuring fear that you see in the eyes of the soldier to your right and left… the fear that can be so easily turned into courage!

Hoemir’s army had marched for miles South of Trondforge, and only small bands of warriors were met… And then, a scout came to tell him that the enemy army, counting more than 40 000 soldiers, was heading to him. Hoemir’s army had been spotted… and it was only a matter of time whether he got swarmed by thousands and thousands of warriors! In a few hours, there would be the first major contact with the enemy!

-3 hours later-
Hoemir had done all that was in his power to encourage his men not to leave him. Walking among the regiments of the regrouped army, he saluted some of the men he had fought with in distant campaigns in every corner of the Kingdom. Some men slammed their swords on their large rectangular wooden shield, others were sharpening their arrows, others were checking their arbalests’ bolt magazines (check at the end of the chapter to learn more about this weapon)… Hoemir decided to place his men on a hill in an offensive formation. If his men placed themselves in a defensive position, he would be in disadvantage as his men couldn’t use all the space in a defensive terrain. He had about 2 500 more men than the rebels, and it would be an unexpected advantage. Despite the low quality of the Volunteer Corp, these soldiers had received a good training and were able to manoeuvre with a minimum of precision. Hoemir knew that war was more a matter of psychology than of “numbers”. He went on foot to meet his men, on the top of a hill to be sure that everyone was able to see him. He said:

“Parmeonian soldiers! Don’t let the grey clouds and the crows take your heart away from battle! Remember… that you are here because you fight for a cause you believe to be right, no? I am here, because I believe in one thing… I believe that a man has a fate, and that whether he wants it or not, the fate will decide what will happen to him! I know that lots of you will die! Yes, some of you will die! But don’t let this frighten you! THIS, is war. Do you think doing war is pleasant? Do you think it is pleasant to kill people and to watch your comrades being slaughtered? NO! Hell, no! Just keep in mind that if we fail here, the consequences will be terrible! By our victory or death, the fate of our nation will be determined! I want you to come back to Nel Parmeo, and to tell everything you have seen doing war! I want you to tell people how war really is! I want you to come back and to make these kind of unprepared war never happen again! I bet some of you still think of a pleasant walk under a blazing sun, watching your blade flying through the ranks of your enemies! Well, an armour is hard! And a weapon is hard too! Once you have killed your first man, you will kill another, and another… until you get killed or that you are too old to fight! Don’t think that I will sit on my horse watching everything going on! I will fight with you! On the battlefield, there are no ranks! Between losing a good leader and a fabulously skilled warrior, I prefer to lose the general rather than losing the skilled warrior! An army is not made of generals! It is made of soldiers! If a general dies, another will take his place! Anyone of you here could lead us to battle! But, like in war, not everyone knows how to lighten this flame of patriotism! This flame that will make you roar! This flame that will awaken the instinct of our ancestors! Tell me, men, do you believe in what you will risk your lives for? If anyone does not believe in what he does, he will never succeed! I want you to believe in yourself! Any of you here can take a crossbow or a bow and take down any of these damn Rebels!”

The men stood silent… and surprisingly no man quitted his place. The men held their ground, knowing that they had a duty, a fate, to accomplish.

“We will attack! I trust in the strength of our people! Hold firm the large wooden shields, and let the drunkenness of combat take your soul! Let this almighty fever possess you!”

The whole army cheered with rage as the enemy was about a mile from them. Thousands of enemy soldiers were slowly walking, followed by a gigantic cloud of dust. Several Rebels were mounted on horses, and they had more archers than Hoemir had expected.

The Parmeonian soldiers slowly walked with a heavy and regular pace. The experienced soldiers were in the 4th and 5th lines, while the rest of the lines were occupied by the volunteers. Hoemir had no choice, he had to attack. He would be disadvantaged if he tried to take a defensive position as his men were only experienced in attacking instead of manoeuvring to make a solid defensive formation.

The soldiers advanced. Tybalt, a young volunteer, was in the second line. He was abundantly sweating under his armour and didn’t know whether he would stand firm or turn back. He saw the great mass of enemies and said: “Uh, oh… We’re just dead…”
Halus, on his side, was riding with his men (as all his knights were fighting on horse) to the right of the enemy, in a rocky territory that headed to the mountains. Hoemir had asked him to harass the enemy with their crossbows and to drive a part of the enemy army out of the main battleline. Halus rode forward, and several bolts fell on the enemy formation. Some gaps were made in the ranks, but other soldiers took the place of their dead predecessor. About 5 000 soldiers ran after the knights, which were already riding to the rocky mountain, desperately trying to reload their arbalests, which were awfully hard to reload on a horse. While, on the Centre, the Rebels were already charging. The Parmeonians kept slowly advancing, while shooting with their arbalests with a particular way. Hoemir had decided to make a particular strategy that his men had developed a few days ago. The large wooden shields were perfect for inserting a small gap in it that could be rapidly closed, some kind of trap just big enough for a crossbow to shoot bolts. The first 2 lines formed up a shield wall and began shooting with a great precision. Several Rebels died, being surprised with such an aggressive strategy. After having shot their 5 bolts, they immediately prepared themselves to charge. The archers released large volleys of arrows over the crossbowmen into the Rebel ranks that transformed the Rebel formation into a loose one. Though, as the crossbowmen were using one hand to hold their shield and another hand to hold their crossbow, they couldn’t reload. So, they simply took up their swords. The rebel warcries reached the Parmeonian Melken (army) and the melee began.

Tybalt had already fired 3 shots with his crossbow and prudently put it back at its usual place, right near his sword. He took his sword and threw himself in the melee with thousands of his courageous comrades.

***
Far away from the first great battle of the divided Grand Melken, a Council was created… some kind of reunion. Princes and nobles from all over the Kingdom came to know why they were called so hastily and what King Polyön II wanted them to do.

The King had to explain some things… like why the people were starving by the lack of food, and the lack of news from the Front, and the great weakness of the Outer Kingdom armies, not being supplied, being abandoned to their own fate…

Yes, the King had to explain things, and to act in consequence.

The Minister of War slowly walked into the hall, and reached the Throne Room. He sat on his chair and looked at his King with a scornful glare.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

[Informations about the Parmeonians]
Arbalest (crossbow): Weapon used by the Parmeonians. Their arbalest, with an ingenuous mechanism, can fire up to 5 shots (as a magazine contains 5 bolts) in less than 3 seconds, but the most skilled arbalesters can reload it in barely 20 seconds. The bolts are not as long as an arrow, but they are much faster and much precisely. These weapons are used by a soldier out of 5 in the Regular army. These weapons are expensive but worth their cost. These weapons are used by every Paladin of the Iron Hand’s Order. Also, some soldiers have the Assault Arbalest. The arbalest is made of iron and has an iron pick perpendicularly oriented, so that the arbalest can be used like a melee weapon (in the style of a flax).

Heavy Arbalest: The ancestor of the modern machine-gun (in our time), the heavy arbalest is placed on a tripod and has a magazine of 60 bolts. It has a slower rate of shooting than the arbalest, but the number of bolts in each magazine is worth its cost. A heavy arbalest is generally reloaded in 35 seconds, but it is easier than the little and more reliable mechanism of the small arbalest.

any thoughts or constructive comments? Don't hesitate to tell me the real things, cuz I need to improve no matter how.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Greek Phalanx

any thoughts or constructive comments? Don't hesitate to tell me the real things, cuz I need to improve no matter how.

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You put an impressive amount of time in the background of this story, and this is good. But what I would really would like to see in this story is good dialogue between characters. This is a personal thing, but I don't think it would harm your story if you tried.

Secondly, while the background-detail you put into the story is good, don't get side-tracked. The reader wants to know how the story progresses, not how an Parmeonian crossbow is operated. These kind of details can be interesting if the main character is busing himself with it, but not as chunks of description in the middle of a battle. If you write about a battle, you can either give a short general overview of the actions of both armies, or you can describe it from the point of view of a soldier. You tried to do both, and I don't it works very well. Hoemir's battle speech was very good, however.

Anyway, please continu. I am interested in how this will end.


BTW, the Mead Hall is usually very quiet, so don't worry if you don't receive replies for every post. Only the really popular writers get that much exclamation. People are reading, they are just reading in silence.

okay ty I'll try to put in use what u told me.

Chapter IV

Halus the Iron Fist was already fighting in the heart of battle, on the right flank of the enemy army. His knights and him had already shot several volleys of bolts which attracted a large part of the main army out of their initial position. For now, the combat between the Iron Hand and the Rebels were more some kind of skirmish. Halus gave a quick look to see how the battle was going on, and he saw that the infantry had already taken great losses… from the very beginning of battle. He ordered his men to ride back to the mountain with all their speed. Arrows whistled near him, but Halus rode back to the rocky pass which led to the mountain. Some of his knights had already fallen in battle, their body crashing hard on the cold ground. Halus’ axe had inflicted several mortal wounds to rebel soldiers, and he kept striking with a demonic frenzy. He followed the last men that were still on the battlefield to reach the other knights. The hoofs of his heavily armoured horse made the ground rumble, but suddenly several arrows fell near him. Several of the nearby knights were taken down of their horse, rolling on the ground. Halus felt a sharp pain in the back, and he felt a second one. He felt that he didn’t control anything, and he felt as if he was a rock being thrown down of a mountain. He fell on the ground, and despairingly tried to get back on his feet. While, one of his lieutenants, a man called Mercutio, saw his leader being almost killed. He felt as if he was himself being hit by these deadly arrows, and he screamed at the nearby knights around him to follow him. He rode and roared with all his strength and might, and his group rapidly crushed several enemy formations. He reached his beloved leader (who was almost dying) and ordered one of his men to take him on his horse. Other arrows whistled around him, 2 knights died as quickly as they had charged forth. He then rode back with the rest of his men to reach the rest of his “regiment”. This “skirmish” had indeed cost the life of 56 of the 500 brave knights, which was a huge amount of casualties for soldiers who had fought during all their lives. Each of these knights were at least worth 15 standard soldiers, and some were surely worth a whole army!

***

On the center, the infantry was already falling back! Hoemir was lost among the melee, and there were no orders given in the chaotic battlefield! Where was the colonel? Everyone had known that the result of this battle would be a defeat, but was Hoemir about to bring the Grand Melken to its biggest defeat?

***

-Nel Parmeo’s Throne Room-

The King was already waiting for the last “guest” to enter the Throne room. He severely frowned as he was growing impatient. Polyön II was already feeling old, tired of politics. His long grey hair showed that he had too much important matters to take care of for a man of his age.

Suddenly, the last guest arrived, panting as if he had run from Vandera to Nel Parmeo. He heavily breathed and sat on a chair, slowly recovering his strengths. This man was General Satcha Beg, who came from Perdica. Immediately after Satcha sat down, the King began the meeting.

“-Noblemen and great ones of the Parmeonian Kingdom, greetings. I call a Council today because we must discuss of an important matter: war.
-Yes, milord. I believe that the attack wasn’t properly prepared… I --- (the Minister of War gets interrupted by the King)
-I know, I know. Someone here didn’t do his duty well. And I shall find him! For now, let’s just stay on the topic. Today, I want you to tell me what how the war is going on. The people of Nel Parmeo grows anxious because of the lack of informations!
-A convoy of supplies was sent a few days ago and we still do not have any news,” said Satcha Beg. “Some messengers told us that the Grand Melken was split in 2, but we don’t know anything more.
-I have an even greater project than uniting the Parmeonian Kingdom, my friends. I suggest that we apply “Conscription” through all the kingdom, to help the Grand Melken. I also think that Lessarium, with its population of 800 000 people, should be able to give us at least 80 000 soldiers by itself, as they had openly refused to send any volunteers. Every man of the Kingdom between 17 and 35 years old not doing any administrative work will have to join the Second Grand Melken.
-We could barely give a sword and an armour to each soldier of the first Melken, my King! How can we supply such an enormous army?
-Our industry will simply focus on doing weapons, my dear Hermius. The men in the mines will have to work twice as hard and their effectives will simply be doubled, or even better, tripled. The whole people of the Kingdom love their country, right? Well, they can give their lives for it, no? Anyway, the soldiers will take care of those who don’t want to take the arms, trust me. Also, your Praetoria (he pointed at Hermius) will lead these men. We wouldn’t want any conscripts to run away or disobey, no?
-I doubt that conscription is the solution… it’s a bit harsh---
-In war, we must take harsh decisions during harsh times, which is the case right now.
-No one has told you since the beginning of the meeting, great one, (Hermius took a deep breath) but the people is not so happy about this war! Nel Parmeo is rioting! 10 civilians were killed during an ambush in the streets! And I lost 2 of my Praetorians! We placed iron gates throughout the city near the barracks, the temples, the palace, and many other places. Nel Parmeo’s heart is getting corrupted, your highness!
-Well, you are here to bring back order. Even if Nel Parmeo is one of the less populated cities, it is the most beautiful one! Conscription will take part everywhere, have you heard me? Assemble the army at Perdica. Hermius and half of his Praetoria, Satcha and his army, Marfirius Agnorium and his 3 militia armies, will train this army and I give you a whole year to make it ready and well-supplied. Carry on!
-But, Welzassil is almost out of reinforcements!
-If it falls, we’ll simply re-take it, Satcha! Stop bothering about such annoying matters! Apollodrus is doing a well job even without the reinforcements I provide him, so he will certainly survive without any! Come on! The Grand Melken needs help! Use anything in your power to get as much conscripts as possible! Use propaganda, use this patriotism, use cleverness, anything!”

So ended the meeting, which ended in a terrible decision: Conscription.

***

Mercutio rode in the mountains for a whole hour, accompanied by a few men to try to find if the infantry had reached the mountains. But instead, he saw with surprise a gift from the Winged God himself! The convoy was going to Trondforge by the mountain pass! He rode as fast as his horse allowed him to go to order to place artillery pieces on the high plateau to provide heavy support to the weakening infantry!

-15 minutes later, in the heart of the battle-

Hoemir had succeeded in rallying the rest of the army to a nearby hill. His army had sustained heavy casualties, but at least, the infantry had made a solid block formation, heavily covered with hundreds of crossbowmen. Hoemir had already killed several men by himself, but he saw no way to beat the rebel army which was more trained, experienced, and numerous after the hours of fighting. “Stand your ground! Stand firm!” yelled Hoemir to his men. Suddenly, a long and sharp sound broke the sound of the shocks of swords, shields, bolts, and spears. The long whistle continued during 5 everlasting seconds, and then a terrible explosion tore apart a rebel regiment. Other whistles continued, and several other explosions were seen. Hoemir looked up and heard the sound of the Iron Hand Order’s horn. He saw men cheering on the top of the plateau, and he knew that they had found artillery pieces. Hoemir and his men watched the sad show of the Rebels being heavily bombarded with the cannons and artillery pieces that were supposed to be sent to the besiegers of Trondforge. The Rebels rapidly fell back, being literally defeated by the artillery. When the rebels were out of reach, the artillery ceased to fire and Hoemir met up with the supply convoy and the rest of the Iron Hand knights. The battle wasn’t over yet, as there were still thousands of Rebels to defeat before reaching Trondforge safely.

Hoemir cried when he saw the unconscious Halus, but he was glad to see that he hadn’t lost as much men as he had thought. He had 32 000 volunteers left, 9 000 standard soldiers left, and 320 Knights of the Iron Hand left. But 7 000 volunteers were wounded and unable to fight for at least a whole week and 4 000 experienced soldiers were wounded too. So, the Grand Melken had to inflict a major defeat (as this victory was only a minor one) to the Rebel army before going back to Trondforge. Though, the soldiers had a few hours of free time to rest and recover. After, they would prepare themselves for the greatest hunt in the Parmeonian History.

for those who didn't know it, the REAL story doesn't really take place in this epoch... it's simply a prelude to the real adventure, which will take place... let's say... later on in the History of this world. So everything mentioned can change and the plot line will be a bit f---ed up and readers will come "wohaaaaaa what the hell where are we what's going on?"

So this story is more some kind of prelude to make you understand the making of this "new" world, and the real story (Book 3) will take place several (I mean SEVERAL) years after. U see what I mean?

I hope this story hasn't died a premature death. After all the work that went into setting the stage that would be a shame.