Alecander, not the normal Athenian

Greece, 431 BC. The country has been torn between Athens and her allies, and Sparta and her allies. Athens grab to power has led to war, and the conflict was known as the Peloponessian War.

Now you'd think I would begin the story like that. But I'm not. My name is Alecander Kristov III, but just Alecander. When I was 25, Athens was at war with Sparta and I joined the army. I was shipped out to Thebes for training. On the way, i met a man named Bhiff. We became fast friends.

"Are you sea sick Alecander?" Bhiff asked, holding his friends shoulder. "No Bhiff, the thought of meeting the Spartan Army in battle scares the crap out of me" Alecander replied. "Don't worry Alecander, we were told that we were going to be in reserves. By the time we see action, the Spartans would already be inside Attica." "Oh great Mr. Fancy Helmet told you this?". "Just keep throwing up then Alecander".

"Alright boys, welcome to Thebes. First I want you to grab a pike, a helmet and a shield. Each shield has an animal on it, I will be calling you by the animal on your shield." Kaskinto said, brushing the feathers on his helmet away from his eyes. "A boar? I got a boar" Alecander moaned. "I have the oxen, must be due to my strength" Bhiff boasted as he flexed his arm. "Ox! Boar! Get into the line." Kaskinto shouted. "Y-yes sir" Alecander said nervously "Um Bhiff, where is the line?" "Over there" Bhiff answered pointing his pike. "Thanks....woops!" Alecander said bumping into two other soldiers. "It's going to be a long 2 weeks" Kaskinto groaned.


Thats the end for Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Week 1, Day 1 of training

"All right men, welcome to the first day of training." Kaskinto said, brushing the feathers away from his eyes again. "Sir, don't you think you should tie that up or something?" Alecander said. "Boar! You do not speak until spoken to understand!?" "Sir yes Sir!" Alecander shouted. "Alright my animals,err, men, it looks like we are going to be cut short of training. 1 week and 6 days cut. That means you will learn everything you need to on the field. The Spartans have invaded Attica and we are going to be sent to meet them." Kaskinto grinned. "I will be leading you men." Alecander started throwing up. "Ewww its on my shoe." A soldier said.

Chapter 2 Part 2

Peloponessian-Attican border


"Alright men, the Spartan Army is not far away, and we are to hold until Pericles's army arrives." Kaskinto looked grim "I will be seperating you into groups, Dung Beetle, Italian Green Butted Monkey and the Macedonian blue bellied buzzard, you will be group Alpha. Boar, Oxen and Worm will be group Beta. Thrakian Hairy Barbarian, Persian Cat, and Egyptian Pyramid Antelope will form grou Delta."

"Here they come!" Italian Green Butted Monkey shouted. "Alright men, in this time of need, a few words are as good as many." Kaskino brushed away the feathers. "Theres going to be alot of guts. You are defending your wives, children and friends! You are defending Athens, Democrocy, and the Wine! Zeus help us if we lose the wine! Charge into the lines without fear! Charge for the motherland!" Kaskino ran toward the Spartans without fear, the soldiers following and Alecander and Bhiff following behind. "Guts?!" Alecander almost threw up. "He's lying Alecander, there aren't going to be any guts. Pikes create internal wounds. You'll be dead before your guts even slip out." Bhiff answered.

"Don't fall back! Charge!" Kaskino and the army clashed shields against the Spartans. Kaskino laughed maniacally, slashing a Spartan in the neck. It was a large mob of men slashing and stabbing each other. "Ummmm, not good that way, and badder that way" Alecander looked back and forth. He fingered with his javelin and threw it. He threw another one, and another until he couldnt feel any others. A soartan charged at him frantically. "Uh Uh Uh UH UH UH!" he screamed. He punched the Spartan and stabbed him in the chest with his pike. He couldnt pull it out. "Bhiff, Bhiff, Bhiff! HELP!" Alecander shouted and jumped behind a rock.

I hope i dont get a warning for spam :sweatdrop: . this was taken from my account at forums.comteck.org, thats why the chapters are posted so quickly

Short Chapter 3

"Alecander whats wrong?" Bhiff asked. "Bhiff, thank Zeus. Where is your sword I need it!" Alecander said. "Eh I threw it at a Spartan getting here." Bhiff replied. "Well thats odd, because my pike is stuck in a dead Spartana and im out of javelins." "MAybe you shouldnt have wasted them in the mob, Alecander." "What kind of an army gives their soldiers 4 javelins?!" Alecander cried.

Chapter 4

“Well Alecander, I’m going back to the battle. Take this” Bhiff handed Alecander a sword and charged back in to the mob.
“That’s great time to get back to the action.” Alecander said. A Spartan jumped in front of him, his pike out.
A Vortex appeared, green lines waving about. “Hmmmm certain death, or vortex. Certain death, vortex.” Alecander looked back and forth. “I’m going to go with the uncertain deathy goodness of the vortex”.
He threw a rock at the Spartan and ran into the vortex.

Chapter 5


Screaming, he fell out. “Hmmm, strange, mountains, and fields of grass. Where is everyone?”.
He looked to his left and noticed a large army fighting another.
A horse galloped by holding a man with a trident.
Trident-man speared a soldier causing blood to shoot out. “I’m in Hades Realm. Super.” Alecander said.
These weren’t Spartans. They weren’t Athenian. Who were they?
Alecander pondered this as he sat behind a rock.
“Wait, what?” Bhiff looked at the rock.
“Sir! May I check what’s behind the rock?” Bhiff asked an officer.
“No! We need you here!” The officer shouted.
“Please” Bhiff pleaded.
“Oh alright” the officer replied.
“And while you’re at it, how about you stick a pike down your throat?” Bhiff said.
“Hey! What’s your name!” the officer demanded.
“Man I love this armor” Bhiff said walking toward the rock.
*sniff* “Why is everyone so mean to me?” the officer asked.

Ch. 6 coming soon, but heres a preview

"Hey Korintos you're not going to let Alecander die aren't you?" Bhiff asked.
"Wait, Alecander? You know what the head generals said to do with him if he ever showed up right?" Korintos replied

Chapter 6

“Alecander? It’s ok, stand and enjoy the stale, dirty air with me” Bhiff said.
Alecander peeked through and stood up.
“Bhiff? I never thought you were in Hades Realm” Alecander said.
“It’s not the Realm Alecander, this is the future. For you” Bhiff said.
“Oh, well it is different. And who’s that man with the horned helmet?” Alecander asked.
“Errrr, that’s Alexander. He’s our commanding officer. See, we’re fighting the Persians.” Bhiff answered.
“Oh, well what about Kaskinto?” Alecander asked.
“He joined the Persians” Bhiff said.
An arrow flew by Bhiff’s head.
“Oh sorry about that mate, lucky it was a warning shot eh?” A soldier said with a smirk.
“Macedonian! Do you want to tell me what the @#&^! You were thinking!?” Bhiff shouted.
“Calm down B, it’s only me.” The soldier said.
“McRick! When did you get out of that city of Tyre you were stationed on!” Bhiff asked.
“They sent me in for back up. But I’ll be going back to Tyre tomorrow morning.” McRick continued “Looks like the battle is dying down and the Persians are retreating.”
Alecander and Bhiff walked down to the camp later that night.
“So where are we Bhiff?” Alecander asked.
“We’re in Gaugamela.” Bhiff answered.
They entered a camp
Arrows flew by Alecander and he hid behind a rock
“Bhiff! Bhiff! Help!” Alecander cried.
“Korintos! You idiot! Disable the defensive arrows!” Bhiff said.
“I can’t Bhiff! I’m about to beat my all time Bibble-Bobble Score!” Korintos said.
"Hey Korintos you're not going to let Alecander die aren't you?" Bhiff asked.
"Wait, Alecander? You know what the head generals said to do with him if he ever showed up right?" Korintos replied.

First three posts merged. I am afraid it's not my kind of comedy, so I won't give any comments.

Chapter 7

The arrows stopped firing.
“Since when did arrows shoot by themselves? The future is mean” Alecander said.
“Alecander, I want you to meet Korintos” Bhiff said.
“Weren’t you the Athenian medical officer who preformed that REALLY uncomfortable procedure where he shoved that thing up m-“
”Alecander! How nice to see you, where have you been all this time?” Korintos asked.
“Oh me and him met at Gaugamela” Bhiff answered.
“The strangest thing” Korintos replied.
Bhiff and Alecander walked to another tent.
“Alecander, I’d like you to meet Rick, he’s what’s going to replace us in the next few years” Bhiff said.
“Hello Alecander, I am Romanis Augustus. I am a Roman Legionnaire” Rick answered.
“Hmmm impressive” Alecander replied.

Sorry for the short chapter, I just REALLY wanted to post this

:dizzy2: THE COMEBACK CHAPTER!!!!! ZOMG :dizzy2:


"Hi I'm Alecander, the main character in Alecander, not the normal Athenian"

"And I'm Bhiff, Alecanders friend"

"No, we have not been captured and executed by savage Persians, instead we have been taking a break on the coasts of the new city, Alexandria, Egypt."

"Yes so expect new chapters soon, in fact expect right NOW!!!!"


Chapter 7 Alexandria, Egypt

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH look at the scenery and this breeze is the best of Egypt!" Alecander beamed at the sight.

"Yeah, too bad we go out in a day" Bhiff sighed toying with the dagger in his pocket.

"What?" Alecander asked.

"Orders came from Alexander, we are going to meet Kaskinto on the battlefield" Bhiff answered sadly.

"Oh......did you ever like Kakinto? I did" Alecander asked.

"Yes I did especially in his later years" Bhiff answered.

"Oh" Alecander looked at the ships sailing down.



Kaskinto recieving orders

"And is there 2 named Alecander and Bhiff in this army?" Kaskinto asked.

"Intelligence has names, and these men do appear" The officer giving Kaskinto his orders replied.

Kaskinto sighed.

"Ready the army we meet them at the gates of Persepolis!" Kaskinto yelled.