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[Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
I love EB.
It has wasted so much of my time; It has twisted so much of my mentality; It has shaped a great deal of my hobbies.
This is one of them. I wish to share it with you all.
As some of you may know, I tend to write quite lengthy proses in a certain AAR. I've decided to post my EB inspired story here for all to read at their leisure. It's a draft, so feel free to give comments and suggestions, especially on certain terminology and historical background.
And do think of a good title for me. Enjoy =]
p.s. I may produce screenshots in later posts since certain bits of it can easily be replicated in the game itself....or somebody with a bit of spare time can give me a hand at it.....
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Prologue:
I hate this city.
Everyday the same thing happens again and again.
The pretenders only bring false hopes and more misfortune.
I hate this city.
I am not a rebel. I've never rebelled in my life, not even against my elders. Sure, there were plenty of arguments and disputes due to my relative inexperience and naivety...and the 'occasional' acts mischief of course. However, the so-called 'rebellious stage' that most young upstarts go through...it never seemed to have happened to me at all.
My homeland is but a shadow of her once magnificent past. Her lands broken, territories torn to shreds by self proclaimed heirs. When the great king lived, they fought like wolves in a pack, they brought down many barbaroi of Asia, they brought civilization to the ends of the world.
But he is dead, rumored to be poisoned, by the very wolves he reared as his pack. Wolves no more, his would-be heirs, they squabbled over his still-born realm like hyenas to a stolen carcass.
Worse off, like vultures, the Romaioi circles upon our kingdom. Using the most pitful of excuses, they divide our land, they take our riches....worse off, they take our honour.
This city, once the magnificent capital of my homeland, now lies as a mere husk of it's former days. Our lands divided into four 'provinces', each governed by tools of the Romaioi.. The clutches of their greed can be seen everywhere. My home is being bled dry, little by little.....
I hate this city.
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Next Chapter:
******** Uprising
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Hmmm...this sounds like it could be set in the Levant? I'm curious, and can't wait for the next installment.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Excellent writing there, satalexton. You really have a talent for this:wink: I'll be following this closely and think of a title.
@Codyos: The city is more to the west (hint).
Maion
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
I wonder which faction it is. Interesting start~:)
I'm definitely going to following this AAR.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Korinthos Uprising (part 1)
“A word from our Consul Lucius Aemilius Paulus.”
A patrician, of a rather portly stature, steps onto a hastily built stage. Though his peers dub it as 'the glare of ambition', his eyes clearly gleamed of greed. Not even his tribunes can hide it however, as there are grumbling even amongst his own troops that they have not received enough loot. Their Consul had taken too much for himself.
“Bloody foreigners! They have to cheek to go to war with us! OR WORSE, telling other people to go to war for them! I'd say we should give these poltroons such a beating, that TEN YEARS from now, people will still speak of them!
The world is full of lies! 'One must not murder', 'one must not steal', 'one must not be dishonest'....These are all lies, deceptions. 'I do not want to be killed', 'I don't want to be a victim of theft', thats why they use lies such as justice and morals to protect their weak selves. The original truth is survival of the fittest. One must devour it all, whether it be other humans, wealth, power, OR THE WORLD ITSELF! Roma will destroy this world's lies and bring forth the truth! ROMA VICTRIX!!!”
“ROMA VICTRIX!! ROMA VICTRIX!!” The legions cheered. What made them cheer with further zeal, though, is what Paulus said next.
“We now go to Epirus! They are in suspect of supporting the Macedonian cause! Their towns and citizens will pay to price to cleanse off the suspicion!” Paulus reached for his gladius, wanting to wave it in the air in a majestic manner. He gave it several subtle tugs, the ornament refuse to move as much as an inch from it's hilt. Giving up, he held onto the hilt and waved with his left. The legion cheered again, eager for plunder.
70 towns were sacked, over 150,000 were enslaved. The Epirotes were left to bankruptcy...and a rekindled hatred...
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Thanks guys =] part 2 coming real soon.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
YEAAAHHH! ROMA VICTRIX!!! :idea2: Or should that be...
ALL HAIL BRITANNIA! ALL HAIL BRITANNIA! ALL HAIL BRITANNIA! ALL HAIL BRITANNIA! :smash:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Nice beginning there satalexton. I'm really interrested to see what this will be like:yes:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Korinthos Uprising (Part 2)
Eprius was in ruins. What was fertile farmland became dark, scorched earth. Villages burnt, men of fighting age crucified, women and young enslaved. Only the elderly and children remained. Wherever the romans tread, desolation and despair follows their wake like a tide. Such is the punishment for being the target of suspicion; such is the punishment for not being roman.
In the mist of destruction, a small party of men make their way south through what was the countryside of Ambrakia. Clad in brown cloaks, concealing their faces, they flank a small boy. Barely able to keep up with the men, the child huffed through the pieces of charred rubble with the resolve of more than double his age. He stumbled a little. The leader of the men, a grizzled veteran, old enough to be the child's grandfather, he bends over towards the child.
“Should I instruct one of us to carry you, young Anastasius?” He inquired politely.
“No, I'm fine. We must hurry to Korinthos.” Although no older than 8, his eyes are more resolute than any man in their band.
“Yes, my lord.” The man gave a subtle bow.
“Deacon, where is Andriskos? I have not seen him since we left.” Young Anastasius asked, as he scorned at the unsightliness of the Roman atrocities. The Epirotes have long been docile, since the death of Pyrrhos. The Italiote barbaroi are more vengeful than the keltoi.
“He is on his way to Syria as we speak. In the name of Makedonia.” Replied the old hypaspist. He too sighs at the degree of destruction.
“I see...”
“HALT! Identify yourselves, travelers!”
A group of hastati approached them. Some of them are carrying pieces of gold ornaments, tying them to the fittings of their pectoral plates for ease of carrying. Their empty handed leader approached Deacon's party. The other hypaspitai slowly shuffled around their young prince. Bastard or not, he is the last bloodline of the Antigonid dynasty. He must be hidden.
“We're peddlers, traveling through the hellas in search for opportunities for trade. There is little we can find here, thus we move towards Thermon for better chance.” Quick witted, Deacon crafts his fibs. Slipping a piece of silver into the leader's hands, he continued, “and this is our proof, may you let us past, kind sir.”
Taken by greed, the romans left the party to their own accord and return to their own affairs of pillaging. With a breath of relief, the hypaspistai continued their secret escort. As they neared the woods...
“Wait!” The Romans changed their minds.
“Boy, come forth.”
Anastasius stepped forward, reaching for something hidden in his cloak, pleaded to the Roman, “Please sir, let me leave with my grandfather. We're but poor traders looking for a mouthful in this barren land.”
“We're keeping the boy, he'll make a good man-whore for the camps. We're sick of dancing hags.” The hastati reached for the boy's rear, with a lustful gaze.
A gentle thud, a severed hand landed onto the grass. Blood gushed from the stump, staining the prince's cloak with a new shade of crimson. Anastasius holds a kopis in his hands.
“Do it.”
Several javelins flew from the woods and tall grass, punching through the Roman's throats with deadly accuracy. The peltasts emerged from the shadows like specters with a stoic wrath, wielding their xithos with unrivaled skill. Within seconds, only the leader was left standing.
“Mercy! SOMEBODY!”
The Roman fell on his knees, cradling his bloody stump on his wrist. The prince raised his kopis.
“All. Hail. Makedonia.”
Silence returned to the countryside.
Barbaroi deserve no mercy.
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Thanks for the support guys =]
p.s. Somebody has clearly watched wayyy too much Code Geass =P
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Another excellent update, satalexton. I like the way you write, it's like a good book. I'm very eager to see how this is going to unfold...
Maion
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
=P those who know greek may actually sniff out hints of what may come in the future =P....
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Looks good so far:2thumbsup:. I agree with Maion, it's like a book. A very rare style among AAR's, and I like it ~:). I'm eagerly awaiting the next update~:).
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
*Stares directly at Satalexton*
Indeed... ;)
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Korinthos Uprising (part 3)
“Thank you, Maion.”
“It is an honour, my lord.”
A thracian rhomphia pierced the hastati's skull, the blade sticking out through the barbarian's nose, pinning the body to the ground. Anastasius' hands gave way and dropped the kopis. The sword landed through another section of the barbarian's head with a weak crunching sound of irony. The prince said weakly, “He was suppose to be my first kill, in the name of Makedonia.”
“You are still too young for such an ordeal, my lord.” The leader of the royal peltasts replied, “Leave things to us until you're old enough.” He shouldered his shield and placed a linen cloak over himself. The other 5 peltasts followed. A young man at the age of 19, thin and agile, and well versed in most known forms of weaponry. Pledging fidelity to Anastasius since the prince could speak, Maion is the last remaining member of the Somatophylakes. What connects the two the most however, is the fact that both are bastards. Maion has Agrianian blood.
“A true Basileus does not need to raise a single finger to bring death to mere barbarians.” Deacon is less pleased with the show. The admission of a hetrogenes into the agema itself is an exception of exceptions, but for somebody so reckless and young... The old veteran gave a deep sigh. “It is unwise to leave the bodies as they are now. We must not leave any trace of our presence.” He warned. The rest of the hypaspists gently nodded to one other, “we should throw them down a well.” One suggested. Deacon shook his head, and turned towards Anastasius. The rigors of a day's endless marching finally takes its toll on the boy.
“We strip the bodies, take everything. The wolves will handle with the rest.” Deacon picked up the prince onto his back. Anastasius rubbed his drowsy eyes. “We should give offerings to the gods.” He suggested.
Maion retrieved the 2 swords. Half expecting to have any filth attached to his weapon, he gave the rhomphia a slight wave. Realizing that the heads of Romans are truly empty, he returned the weapon back to it's sheath. “To Apollo or to Zeus?” He handed the kopis to Deacon.
“We cannot afford any detours, we must hide the prince in Korinthos” Deacon protested. The child is fast asleep. “Must you always goad the young boy, Maion?” He hissed, glaring at the halfbreed's thracian weapon.
“We'll pass through the two places anyways, we'll offer the weapons to Zeus, the plunder to Apollo.” Maion said meekly, “You take our lord to Korinthos.”
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I just had to use that name :smash:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Another good update!:wink: No problem about the name, it actually honors me that you use it. Funny thing is, while Maion is my forum name, my real name is Anastasios, which you also use in your AAR:laugh4:
Maion
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
This AAR is really like a book. And I mean like a really good book.:beam:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
^ thats cuz it's the first draft of a book ^^;;
I need to do some more research for more material...In the meantime, help me think of ways to get rid of pesky romans. =]
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Well, tha'd be a tad difficult, especially with a destroyed Epeiros and a weakened Makedonia. Not to mention the ever-sideshifting southern Hellenic poleis. Maybe some intervention from the east? A battle of Magnesia that didn't go wrong? Or Hellenes going to the Delphoi and finding a hidden secret pre-cataclysmic supertechonology weapon of mass-destryction like the ones used upon the Keltoi when they invaded Hellas?
Maion
P.S.: I'm obviously kidding about that last one:laugh4:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
actually, this story follows our history.....at least up till the sack of Korinthos....
=[ so the roman problem is a very big problem.
here's my song:
In my kingdom there's a problem,
And that problem's the romans,
They rape all our young men,
But they never give it back...
THROW THE ROMAN DOWN THE WELL~
So our kingdom can be free!!!
You must grab him by his horns!
Then we have a big party!
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Alright, I've haven't researched enough material yet, but i feel compelled to give an update once every day or two so some of you won't stretch your necks waiting for it...
sry this is a bit short...
Korinthos Uprising (Part 4), the memory of a traitor.
While our small party of no more than 20 split off their respective ways towards Korinthos, a Makedonian named Andriskos, sneaks his way through the Makedonian countryside. As the puppet ruler of Adramyttios, crossing the Hellespont without attracting the Roman Senate's eyes and ears is not easy. Ruler in name, Client in reality.
The Makedonians curse him. They curse him to pieces. Old women dropping roof tiles are one of things he worries the least. Although he's not the only traitor, he is one of the four Makedonians that any Greek would want to get their hands on...to kill. Roman eyes are one matter, Greek swords are a completely different matter.
Andriskos was part of the Agema, an order of Makedonian elite that constitute the basileus' royal army. He betrayed his kingdom not for power nor gold talants, the Romans won't ever give him either, but for out of loyalty. The sky around him gradually darkened as the sun sinks behind the hills, he took a deep breath and glanced back towards the fields, a lump forms within his throat.
“All hail Makedonia! All hail Makedonia!”
That wasn't so long ago, he thought. He smiled bitterly, the memory of the Battle of Kallikinos still fresh in his mind....
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ok, i'm not overly sure with the spelling of the names, perhaps some greek speaker would give me a hand...
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
satalexton
THROW THE ROMAN DOWN THE WELL~
I know, I know! Something like: THIS. IS. PELLAAA!!! Just kidding:2thumbsup: Nice update by the way, satalexton. I'm eager to see how you're going to deal with those filthy Romaioi dogs:wink:
Naion
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
I just read the all of it. Great story so far. It will be interesting to see where it goes.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
omg~ MAA teh Earl of AARs...what an honour.
I've written the next section up on paper in a coffee shop (them and their crappy interwebs). I'll type it up soon!
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Korinthos Uprising (part 5) The battle of Kallikinos
"Move out!" Perseus exclaimed. He and his hetarios galloped forward. The thraikioi followed and whipped their mounts after the basileus. Andriskos watched pensively as the cavalry advance from their respective flanks. Some of them readied their cornel wood javelin, preparing to throw them at maximum range, thus allowing a follow-up volley before starting the sword-play. Andriskos is one of the Agema, the Makedonian elite in both society and military. The Basileus' sword.
As the Makedonian cavalry and light infantry ran out to start the battle with their (self-proclaimed) roman counterparts, The main infantry force swiftly spanned into a battleline from their previous marching formation. The front line shuffled to the 2 sides as the second line marched forward, branishing their briskling rows of sarissae. Some kestrospendonetai formed up behind the 16 rows of phalangitai. Peltasts, armed with spears, sword and javalin marched to the left, along with some thraikioi peltasts. Andriskos and his comrades marched to the right flank and met with the royal peltasts, young men of noble blood in their prime age. Their captain however, caught Andriskos' attention. He is an aging man in his 40s, but that was not uncommon. The captain of the peltasts wore neither a kopis nor xithos on his hilt, but a rhomphia. Andriskos gawked at the captain for a few more seconds before Deacon smacked him back into place with the back of his spear.
The romans had sent out their Italian cavalry and their keltoi auxiliaries to meet the Basileus. The basileus halted, unable to discern the numbers of enemies through the clouds of dust. The thraikioi light hurried forward in aid of the Perseus. They fought like wild beasts set from their cages, snapping off the spear points of the Italians and hacking at the legs of the horses with immense ferocity, they then would strike at the flanks with spears and javelins, bringing down the rider. The Italians fell into complete disorder, trampling many of their keltoi allies.
Grasping the opportunity, Persus and his heteiroi charged at the centre, dislodging their foes upon first onslaught. They continued to press upon them with their xyston and kopis as they fell back. Emboldened by their Basileus' heroism, the phalangitai rattled their sarissae against their shields. Deacon ordered the infantry to march forward with a swift wave of his arms. The standards pointing forward, drums thundering the marching rhythm, the pezoi lowered their sarissae. The battleline pushed forward steadily towards the romans, singing their marching chords in high spirits. Shouts of "Roman Scum!" and "Italiote Barbaroi!!" can be heard from now and then.
The romans tried to hack at the rows and rows of pikes. Jeers of taunting laughter can be heard as one after another, the legions tried and fail to attack the phalangitai. One tried to hack at the spear points with his gladius, only to have several holes poked through his chest as 6 of the pezhetairoi thrust their pikes forward. Another tried to throw his missile from a distance, only to see it deflected by the rows of sarissae, landing upon the ground with a soft thud before being trampled into atoms by the marching phalangitai.
Faced with an endless wall of pikes, the legions could bear no more. One by one, the cohorts deserted the frontline, intolerant of the fruitless and one-sided attrition. The Auxiliaries, seeing the imbecility of their masters, swiftly fled the field to save their own skins. Only the veterans stood their ground with their spears, owing that to the their experiance...and the fact that they're in a safe distance from the carnage.
Victorious, Perseus ordered the standards be reversed and his cavalry to retire. He did not want to risk the cohesion of his men in the ensueing rout chase, he knew the base cur still carries a mean bite. Also, bearing the title "slaughter of romans" would not fare well on the negotiation table.
At the end of the day, more than 200 horse and 2000 men were killed. The Makedones on the other hand, only lost 20 cavalry and a handful of light infantry in the trade. A very good start for Makedonia, Andriskos himself slew 2 keltoi warriors. Their torqs would yield a good fortune...
Cheers of "ALL HAIL MAKEDONIA!" and "MAKEDONES NIKATOR!!" were heard everywhere. Everyone were in high spirits. The thraikioi were the most ecstatic of all, they returned to the camp singing and dancing, carrying the heads of romans on the top of their spears. A truly artistic sight with a gruesome and barbaric twist. Many passed out from drinking, in honour of Makedonia and their fallen kin. The sight, smell and voices of that night's celebration would be eternally etched into Andriskos mind....for they intend to finish the Romans once and for all in Pydna.....
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Much thanks to Livy for providing such details...
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
is it me or the lack of pictures' killing this thread ._. It's not really an AAR so there's no screenshots, but i can sketch some character designs and battle scenes if you guys desire...
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Personally I like it with or without pictures. The story is what really matters to me and I like it so far~:).
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
satalexton
is it me or the lack of pictures' killing this thread ._.
You're probably right. Including pictures would help. Most casual readers only get interested in an AARs/stories when those have pictures.
EDIT: That is if you want a lot of people to read your story. If you don't really care about the "popularity among the masses" of your story and would prefer just a few dedicated followers, than you could continue on doing the same.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
I have to agree with the rest. Your AAR has a unique style, you should keep it. Nice battle description there, by the way:wink: Hope you kick 'em Italoi out of Hellas for good soon.
Maion
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
OK, this story is NOT dead.
The good news is, I've drafted out the next chapter..and some of you may begin to understand why this 'volume' is called korinthos uprising...BUT.
...I don't have the time to type this down in word format yet, thanks to the festivities and general annoyance of real life.
Sorry to keep your necks long waiting...=[ hope you still bother about this thing here....
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
I'm still subscribed:tongue:. Good to see your back:smiley:.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
julius_caesar_the_first
I'm still subscribed:tongue:. Good to see your back:smiley:.
Likewise:yes:
Maion
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Expect more to come up next year. And god, this story still has no title. =[
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Korinthos Uprising (Part 6), Owned!
'Pydna.....
“WE ARE THE AGEMA!”
“ALL HAIL MAKEDONIA!”
“STAND YOUR GROUND, SONS OF MAKEDONIA!”
.....
.......
.........
...........
....
..
.
“DEATH AND GLORY!!!”
...
......
...
.....
“Bring my blade and shield to my son Maion, he shall lead the peltasts in my stead....ALL HAIL MAKEDONIA!!!”
.....
“ITALIOTE BARBAROI!!”
...
...
...
“HYPASPISTAI! DISENGAGE! THIS IS -MY- ORDER!!!”
“But my Basileus-”
“I have a hidden bloodline near Serdike, GO!”
...
....
.....
......
“ROMA VICTRIX!!”
“AVE FORTUNA!!”
....
..'
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...
..
“So, you're Andriskos.”
.....
“So, YOU'RE Andriskos from Makedonia?” Demetrios Soter raised his voice.
“Yes, ...Basileus.” The address left a bad after-taste in Andriskos mouth.
“And what proposal do you have for me?hmm?”
.....
“The defeat of Roma.” Andriskos replied loud and clear.
“Right.” Demetrios studied Andriskos' face. It was dark and dusty, weary from a restless journey....The Seleukidai narrowed his eyes and stared at him, judging him. Andriskos dared not return the gaze, Demetrios Soter is divine...at least he believes he is. Gods are fickle beings, too. Andriskos did not wish to gamble his chances...
“Such an uneasy silence,” he thought. A nearby light flickered slightly, followed by a rustle of leaves. Demetrios finally rose, and spoke curtly, “I shall discuss this, with my advisors.” He turned and left for his chambers, leaving Andriskos blinking. A eunuch offered a seat and some wine, which he took to quite gratefully. He had ventured so far, to seek aid from fellow hellenes against a common foe; he had ventured for so long, to raise arms with a fellow son of Makedonia against the barbaroi. A son of Seleukos, divine heir to Alexandros apparently, a fickle descendant of Dionysos, now tells him to wait.
The day gradually reaches to an end, as the slaves and eunuchs scurry about lighting lamps and muttering to one other in their own babble as they carried food towards a distant location to be prepared. Andriskos finished his third helping of wine as he wondered upon the result of Demetrios' discussion. A nearby eunuch hastily filled another helping of wine and placed a small platter of cured olives. Though hardly a fan of gourmet, Andriskos found the taste of the olives oddly familiar. Olives are a common staple, as well as a good source of oil, but the particular flavour of these ones...could only be found around Taras....
Two sets of footsteps echo against the chamber corridors, Demetrios emerged with a stern face. Andriskos throat sank as his stomach boiled spontaneously with righteous hatred. The second man, of a portly stature, grinned. His greedy eyes glowed against the lamp lights as the sky darkens.
“Another lie has been defeated, oh rebellious client governor of Roma.”
“WHERE IS YOUR HONOUR DEMETRIOS!?”
The 'Soter' said nothing as he beckoned the TABs. Mail-clad, faces hidden, the Thorakitai Agematos Basilikou marched in behind Andriskos.
“ROMAOI BARBAROI!” Andriskos spat.
“Quisque Est Barbarus Alio,” Lucius grinned wider, cheeks stretching like a frog. “Honour, valour and laws mean nothing. Survival of the fittest is the only law of Roma. You are unfit to survive. Now Demetrius, will you please.”
“Roma Victrix. Guards, lock him up.” Demetrios nodded flatly.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Good to see this continuing.
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
I want to ask some of your opinion on the story, who do you want to read about next? Anastasios or Andriskos?
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
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[Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
Korinthos Uprising -Part 7-
"You're no barbaroi"
“Congratulations Andriskos, you'll be seeing our senators.”
“...”
“The elders are interested in your intrigues, as well as deciding your method of death.”
“...”
“Merchants from Sinae spoke of a very interesting method, involving the tying of your limbs to chariots...”
“...”
It has been three weeks. Chained to a long wooden stake by his wrists, Andriskos is being ushered through the wilderness like cattle. The blistering heat from the Mediterranean sun bears down upon his back, angry pink patches form as the sun-burnt skin on his back peel and flake. His tunic reduced to mere rags as his captors lash him with their whips, pushing him to keep up with the caravan of prisoners. Desperation, hatred and exhaustion rendered him silent despite the constant taunt of the Romans. They would be in Roma by now if they went by sea, but the Roman's barbarism compel them to invent grueling methods to demoralize and torture their prisoners. They just reached the foot of the mountains of western Kilikia, Italia is still months away if they go on at this pace.
Lucius and his cronies are clearly not in any hurry, despite the senate's urges. The Proconsol has his powers afterall. Every night he and his barbaric minions would entertain themselves by abusing their dominion over their prisoners, such as forcing them to create a man-chain (which Lucius would occasionally join in at the end, at the front if he was drunk) or forcing the poor exhausted souls to dance upon hot coal. Afterwards which they would drink themselves silly with a beverage they called 'barley-wine', which smell suspiciously like beer, then proceed to vomit all over the camp. By the time the ordeal ended, the night would be half gone, and many of the prisoners would not be in the condition to peacefully enter their precious slumber. Day after day, fatigue overwhelms a few, taking them to the underworld. Andriskos, barely alive, would close his eyes and force himself to take whatever rest he could, no matter how painful his hind was. He had no intention of dying without howling at the barbaroi senate.
“Barbaroi.” Andriskos spatted. It was the end of another day of whipping and torment, and he could barely sit properly on the Galatioi mountains. “Ironic statement there, you finally spoke,” one of the prisoners remarked, “you're literally surrounded by 'barbaroi' so to speak. I'm a thraikioi, all of us are.” Several of the prisoners lifted their heads and chorted, “Aye.” Flustered, Andriskos quickly replied, “Not you lot, them.” Pointing at the tents with his sharp glance, he continued. “I'm a Makedones, I've seen much of thraikioi valour in my life. You're no barbaroi.”
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can a mod update the thread title for me please?
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
Just dropped by and read this. Awesome stuff, really nice :yes:
As for the title now, why don't you use something like "Alternate Reality" or something that would suggest the nature of your story?
Maion
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
=P well up till now, it's still based on reality.....other than the man-chain..>_>
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Man-chain? So is that like a conga line, or...
...
So it's like a conga line, right? :sweatdrop:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Yeah, like a a Makedon had to be forced into the man chain...
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
ok you need to just leave it as AN EB inspired tale THAT THE PERFECT TITLE!~!!!!!!11111one
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Quote:
Originally Posted by
desert
Man-chain? So is that like a conga line, or...
...
So it's like a conga line, right? :sweatdrop:
well...it LOOKS like a conga line...but the people are a lot closer....and nakkid...
...I think I shouldn't elaborate >_>
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
Well, since this AAR is based on historical accuracy (at least up to some point, always good to leave some things open for the writer), I'd like to add a few things that may make this story of your more accurate.
Due to common modern misconception, the word "Barbaros" was a word used by Greeks and meant "Non-Hellenes". This was due to the fact that the Greeks thought the non-Greek people (mostly Thraikians and Celts, with whom they where in more direct contact) said 'Bar-Bar' a lot when they spoke. Hence the name (duh...:tongue:).
Now the word itself, as I stated above, was used to describe all non-Greek people. This includes Thracians, Celts, Phoenicians, Italians etc. Plus, it was not always used as a demeaning word, meaning it was not very often used to inslut someone. Not that it didn't happen at all, mind you. So basically you couldn't say the Thracians where no barbaroi, 'cause that goes against the meaning of the word. The word, in it's Latin meaning (trouser-wearing, unwashed, smelly creatures that where enemies of Rome) would be shaped later on and by the Romans exclusively.
Just my :2cents: here:yes: Oh yeah, keep up the good work.
Maion
P.S.: Let us not speak about homosexuality now, that's a subject that should at least be clear to every modern person by now. I understand this was probably meant as humor, but let us be careful when saying things that may cause flamewars. I can take a humorous statement, but someone else might not, you see:yes:
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Re: -Title pending- An EB Inspired tale...
no problem =D I'll out that into acount when i write my second draft =]
Ok, choice time! Andriskos OR Anastasios OR Maion? Who's tale do you want to read next?
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
I say Anastasios. I'm curios what he has been up to:smiley:.
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
Here's a recap of those 3 characters:
Maion: a leader of a small band of elite peltasts, 1/4 thraikioi,1/4 agrianikoi, childhood friend of Anastasios.
Anastasios: Hidden bloodline of Perseus, hetrogenes, currently bidding his time in Korinthos.
Andriskos: ex(?)hyaspistai, nobility. Hated by Makedones. Secretly tied to Deacon. Attempted to seek Seleukitai aid but got captured.
It took Andriskos a whole month to reach the Hellespoint, 2 weeks to sail to Syria. The Proconsol actually 'played' with him for a month before they started the trip. So Anastasios' party have been laying low in Korinthos for almost half a year, and i'm sure they're eager to stir up some anti-Roman sentiments..... =]
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
Is he going to get superpowers from female :clown:?
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
not unless the casse FM have suntherlands for bodyguards, and their champion's the lancelot >_>
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
recently i've been busy with real life, especially now that CNY is approching (moneto grabbing time! xD)... I've been scribbling story notes from time to time though. I'd like some of your opinion on the storyline (something of the VERY distant future)...Should I eventually kill off Maion?
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
Nice to know you're still working on it.
Have an idea for and official title yet?
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Re: [Place-holder title]MAKEDONIA: An EB Inspired tale...
well, for a while i considered "Anastasios of the rebellion" but that's overly misleading.....i can pm u the storyline n u can help me think of one if u want....