Have you ever wondered...?

Here's an interesting concept for a thread. Everyone wonders about some of the wierd things in RTW. A denarii for your thoughts...
And no haters. This isnt a ranting thread. If you want to complain about CA or loadgame bug or whatever, go away.

I'll go first.

Have you ever wondered... if the Senate, out of boredom, assigns itself some missions if the other three Roman factions are gone?
...if the Senate ever outlaws itself because they failed a mission?

Have you ever wondered... if the Moon People are going to be in the expansion pack?
...if CA is going to create a hatmaker for Roman factions to protect them from the stares of the Moon People?

Have you ever wondered... what goes through the mind of the spy you sent to the Amazon settlement?
...if he fakes his own death so he can have some "R&R"? :happyg:

Have you ever wondered... if Head Hurlers get their heads at the local market? "Hmm.. no, too squishy. No, too unripe. Ah! Perfect!"

Im afraind i cant say i have Kekitirae although i have allways wonderd what if when pther factions declare war on you is it all the evil senates work............. And even now are they ploting to take over the world with there pathetic exscuse of a faction........

Have you ever wondered... if the handlers play fetch with the war dogs when they're bored? ~:handball:

... how many throat lozenges the screeching women get through in a battle?

Who cleans up after the elephants around the campground?

If the camels get offended by the "The smell worse than any camel . . ." pre-battle speech?

If the Senate army will ever leave Italy? ~D ~D
If the Egyptians will ever be the first faction destroyed?
If the Greeks will ever be able to fight off the attacks of the Macedonians and Romans? ~D :cool:

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Have you ever wondered... if the handlers play fetch with the war dogs when they're bored?

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If the war dogs accidently bite off their handlers hands?(Then they wouldn't have any hands to handle them with!)

If the naked fanatics actually wear clothes at home?

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If the naked fanatics actually wear clothes at home?

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or how do they do ‘dress’ down on casual Fridays?

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Originally Posted by conon394

or how do they do ‘dress’ down on casual Fridays?

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Simple, no lime in their hair

And they wear underpants, a hat and a monocle for special occasions.. (see pic)

:toff:

This is turning into the Fashionable Dacian or...Eric.

Wether hillmen actually live on hills.

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Originally Posted by Arrowhead

Wether hillmen actually live on hills.

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Haha.

Why Parthian Eastern Infantry forgot to change from their pyjamas before the battle?

...whether soldiers gossip about their funny leader's names?

Do retinues get upset when they are traded about?

Wether Spartans had a dictionary with the word ''Rout'' in it.

If the greece cultures couldn't be one again

Why all infantry seem to be invincible when you are in a british heavy chariot.

Wether Iron-Skinned Axemen polish their armour every day.
Wether Iron-Skinned Axemen accidently walk into their armour when charging.

I don't get why everyone hates desert axemen? But I've never faced them in a battle.. lol

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Originally Posted by Craterus

I don't get why everyone hates desert axemen? But I've never faced them in a battle.. lol

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:speechless: You wait. My Foresters hardly do anything...

Why poeni infantry aren't mounted on ponies?

Why do infantry men all have the same colured hair? Do they all go to the same hairdressers?

Why are'nt there hippo races in the hippodrome

Why no-one bleeds in RTW? ~:confused:
When men die, they fall down and turn grey immediately? ~:confused: It woulld take a while for them to rot.

...if vultures follow your traveling army like Kirsty Alley follows Meals On Wheels?

...how rich you can get by building an insane asylum for retired generals?

...doesn´t anyone sleep? It seems to be daytime all the time!
...why can´t I sneak-a-peak through the windows at the Pharaoh´s hareem?
...why doesn´t anyone ever get executed at the execution square?

Why the general's ancillaries disappear in an ambush? Surely if it was an ambush, they'd have no time to get the non-warriors out of the battlefield? Were they ever really there? cue x-files music

I wonder how they fit a whole army on a single bireme? ~:confused:

Admiral: YOU, drop the oars. Use this guy as a paddle, for we need space, pronto!

I wonder if smart/trained/experienced/elite ladder-climbing wardogs are possible in the XPack? ~D

Captain: Sir! The wardogs are climbing the ladders on all sides! We are doomed!!

General: NEVER!!! Release the flaming rats to discombobulate them!

later...

General: ::whew:: Those flaming rats saved our hides. Call up the Hillmen and let them have their share of the roasts....

:dizzy2: :charge:

Do Naked Fanatics loose their "Frighten Infantry" in the winter? I mean... They shrink when its cold right...? ~:confused:

Why doesn't the prim general kill off the slubberdegullion I just assigned him?

Does the Comedian mock the Artist?

I want to hear the Evil Mother-in-Law nag the Drunken Uncle.

You wonder...how the heck did that flying head kill a fully armoured roman.

Did it had a auto bite the bugger's neck homing device?

What if it missed and bite the of the poor naked fanatic in between the legs.~D

What did mamma think when she named the armenian prince "Arses" ?

...if the screeching women are really just the mother-in-laws of the soldiers on the field of battle?

why does ARROW THROUGH HIS HEAD likes FORESTERS

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Originally Posted by Emperor Umeu 1

why does ARROW THROUGH HIS HEAD likes FORESTERS

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because they are so damn Good!

spartans are better and urban spartan cohorts are the best

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Originally Posted by Emperor Umeu 1

spartans are better and urban spartan cohorts are the best

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They are totally differant!

what's totally different

The troop types!

yeah i knew that but do you mean, foresters and my urban spartan cohort or the spartans and the urban cohorts

What on earth do you mean by urban spartan cohorts? Are they a super breed between the two or something? Im confused.

If spies are really leaving foreign cities just to escape from their native wives for an afternoon? Are said wives nagging because of the smell of your pet monkey?

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Originally Posted by Emperor Umeu 1

yeah i knew that but do you mean, foresters and my urban spartan cohort or the spartans and the urban cohorts

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Both!

... who'd win in a Papacy vs SPQR grudge match (and who'd end up being the most irritating ~:) )

The papacy they did my head in in MTW they just wont go ! quite litrelly

thats true and people seem to help them like all da time
and i havent really wondered about wat the first guys talking bout