Mafia rules

[Beskar]

Rule 133.

Do not visually violate everyone in the thread with your posts.

[Centurion1]

Rule 134

do not imitate such visual scum by doing the same thing. you will get lynched.

[Sprig]

135. Do what it takes to win.

[Beskar]

135. Do what it takes to win.

I learnt not to do that in my first mafia game (and goes around and after it). It comes to a point that quality and standard comes essential to the game-room if you want to be respected by fellow players. Not saying I am respected, but since then, I learnt not to try to do that in order to try to improve myself as a member and a player.

I also had a run in with a couple of bad players who did the same, and I found out that I really disliked the tactics they used, both as a player and as a person, and other that the fact it caused in-thread situations, I got to see what others probably thought of me.

So I am trying to improve myself a game at a time.

So I am not sure if this rule has been done, but I will add it just incase.



136. If it is not clear, do your best to be respectful of other players and remember, a game is to have fun, not to win, as you can still have a laugh if you lose, you can't if you insult and disrespect other players.

[pevergreen]

Doing what you can is fine, as long as you play nice.

[Csargo]

Yes play nice while you virtually murder them in the face. It helps your image.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Being nice? I can do that. How about death by chocolate?

If I ever get a chance to do murder descriptions again, I will probably kill people by giving them a box of 16 very, very, very tasty chocolates, and only one of them will be filled with fatal poison. It will still be completely delicious. I will tell them that they only have to worry about the one poisoned chocolate, and let them have a free taste of one of the un-poisoned chocolates. It will taste so good that they must have another. It's only fatal poison... there is a rather large chance of eating an unpoisoned chocolate, so it's worth the risk. Life is short, so why bother playing it safe? It's delicious chocolate, after all. Under the same reasoning, after they survive the second chocolate, they will be hooked and they have to have another one. By then it's still only a 1/14 chance of death, and that's the same number as Valentine's Day, and Valentine's day is the one where you give chocolate to your love. So obviously the odds are in your favor. You eat another chocolate. Mmm.... so good. Now there's 13 left... 13 is an unlucky number, so you grab that chocolate and you get ready to throw it away..... and then you decide it is too delicious and you eat it. Well, you're still here, and you survived the unluckiest chocolate, so you must be on a lucky streak. A one in twelve chance of dying? Bah, you're a manly man (or a womanly woman) and you're not afraid. You can chance it. 12 hours on a clock, 12 months in a year, 12 in a dozen... 12 is a nice number, so you bite into that fourth chocolate with full confidence, knowing you will survive. Lo and behold, you're still alive! Your mouth is in heaven, as a dribble of saliva runs down your chin. You wipe your chin, and continue... 11 remaining, might as well make it a nice round number. Chomp, chew chew chew.... pure ecstacy. You realize you are tempting fate now, but there's 10 whole chocolates left. You try to resist, but you cannot. 10 is a round number, but it's just a bit too round, after all... 9 would be better. Munch munch... and you realize that in mathematics, the number 9 is a Lucky Number. You can't possibly die with a lucky number. So you eat the chocolate. It melts in your mouth, and you're on Cloud Nine. But you realize that in Chinese culture, the number 8 is also very lucky, so you quickly gobble that one. In a frenzy, you realize that the number 7 is perhaps the luckiest number of them all! So you shove the next chocolate in your mouth and accidentally swallow it before you really get a chance to taste it. Disappointed, you sulk for just a moment, until you come up with the perfect plan to cheer yourself up... what if you put TWO chocolates in your mouth at once? Wouldn't that be grand??? Well before you have second thoughts, you shove both chocolates in and relish the sweet, sweet, awesome flavor. You must be dead already, because you are in heaven. And then, after several long moments, you realize the chocolates are gone. You lick your chocolate covered fingers and look at the 4 left remaining. You're still alive, should you tempt fate? With 3 unpoisoned chocolates remaining, you OBVIOUSLY have to eat at least one more. How could you live with yourself knowing that the perfect piece of chocolate was being eaten by ants, who are having the time of their tiny little lives? No ant deserves chocolate this good. Heck, if this chocolate was covered in ants, you'd still eat it. So you pop another one in your mouth and just let it sit there, slowly melting. You close your eyes and lay down, clutching the box of chocolates in your hands, making sure no one else can have any. You feel like you're floating.... on a puffy cloud. You almost drift off to sleep, but you can feel that there's only a little bit of chocolate taste left in your mouth, so you reach for another one... there's 3 left. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe, take a candy before you croak. Never, ever, let it go. Eeny, meeny, miny, moe. Ah, so you take the chocolate and tuck it in your mouth.... BUT WAIT!!! WHAT IF YOU DIED??? Then you'd never have a chance to taste the other two chocolates!!! You simply cannot allow that to happen, so you shove the remaining two candies into your mouth. All 3 chocolates in your mouth at once.

Mmmm.... fatally delicious.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

Then I walk into the room and tell you that none of the chocolates were actually poisoned, and I shoot you between the eyes with my silenced Beretta.

[Double A]

Pizza you're full of it

[Sasaki Kojiro]

137. Being a townie is a waste of time. If you get a town role just slack off and hope you get a mafia role next game, where you can slack off again and get a win because you blend in perfectly.

[Gekkamir]

138. If you lose, verbally abuse everyone in the thread, and make sure to put some extra abuse on the people who voted to lynch you.

[Beefy187]

138. If you lose, verbally abuse everyone in the thread, and make sure to put some extra abuse on the people who voted to lynch you.

Lets not
We are in the gentlemens club after all.

[Choxorn]

139. CFC'ers will always kill each other, Orgahs will always kill each other, and TWC'ers will also always kill each other. This goes double for newcomers.

[Askthepizzaguy]

139. CFC'ers will always kill each other, Orgahs will always kill each other, and TWC'ers will also always kill each other. This goes double for newcomers.

It's funny because I always thought there might be factionalism, like people standing up for people from their own forum.

Instead it's like you have to kill the evil you know before you can think about killing the evil you don't know.

[pevergreen]

I guess it has something to do with you having played with the people before, you know what they can do.

[Seon]

140: Always trust Seon

[Askthepizzaguy]

140: Always trust Seon

I'm calling bogus on this one.

Why?

You yourself have told me things to the effect of you like to backstab for the sake of backstabbing.

So, this is exactly why we need a committee to approve the rules and get rid of the rules that don't make any sense or no longer apply or aren't funny. (For fun, because obviously this list is for fun to begin with. But still if we're going to have such a list it would be nice if it made some sort of comedic sense).

[Seon]

I'm calling bogus on this one.

Why?

You yourself have told me things to the effect of you like to backstab for the sake of backstabbing.

So, this is exactly why we need a committee to approve the rules and get rid of the rules that don't make any sense or no longer apply or aren't funny. (For fun, because obviously this list is for fun to begin with. But still if we're going to have such a list it would be nice if it made some sort of comedic sense).

Very well.

Rule Number 140: Always trust Seon...to stab you in the back when you expect it the most.

[Sasaki Kojiro]

141: there are no rules about the rules (except this one)

[Chaotix]

In that case it makes perfect comedic sense that the backstabber would tell everyone to trust him unconditionally.

[Askthepizzaguy]

141: there are no rules about the rules (except this one)

There are other rules about the rules.

[Seon]

In that case it makes perfect comedic sense that the backstabber would tell everyone to trust him unconditionally.

Trust me, I would never attempt to pull something like that. When I backstab someone, it is either by request or I do it after a week's notice. I never do it by surprise.

....

Yes, yes, never at all...

Hey look! A bird!

[Askthepizzaguy]

Rule 79: There are exceptions to every rule.

Rule 68: ATPG doesn't know that 67 is followed by 68 and not by 69.

Rule 81: Andres doesn't know that pevergreen doesn't know that 67 is followed by 68 and not by 69.

Rule #82: "Mafia Rules" that only apply to the "Mafia Rules" thread are stupid...err...hmm

Rule 83: This rule is not self-referential, and also completely true.

Lots of rules about rules in this rule thread.

[Choxorn]

Very well.

Rule Number 140: Always trust Seon...to stab you in the back when you expect it the most.

"I'm dishonest. And a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly, mate, it's the honest ones you've got to watch out for, cause you can never predict if they're about to do something very... stupid."

[Beefy187]

I guess it has something to do with you having played with the people before, you know what they can do.

I've always thought its because you'll feel more comfortable killing someone you know. Because you know they won't mind getting killed.

[TinCow]

There are other rules about the rules.

Rule 79 makes Rule 141 valid.

[pevergreen]

Agree with others in the Glossary thread, this needs a clean.

My nominations of only actual rules (some slightly modified, numbers changed)

As Sasaki said:

The real Rule #1.
Rule #2: When in doubt, fake some PMs.
Rule #3: Convince people that you are innocent, even if you are.
Rule #4: "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer" -- Vito Corleone
Rule #5: Lynch Sasaki. Just in case.
Rule #6: If Mafioso, build up a fake role from the onset. Reveal at appropriate moment.
Rule #7: If mafia, don't kill Sasaki. He's probably on your side, somehow.
Rule #8: This is mafia, not the boyscout knot-tieing championships. Players are supposed to backstab, lie and betray.
Rule #9: Mafia is roleplaying. Characters kill, lynch and betray. Not players.
Rule #10: Whoever is organising the secret town discussion group(PTI/PTN), is always guilty
Rule #11: Remember Rule #1.
Rule #12: Always use invisible mode
Rule #13: Never assume the new player/replacement is harmless... (privateerkev made this one, who remembers his stunning play?)
Rule #14: Reenk is Reenk
Rule #15: It's not personal, it's just business.
Rule #16: Praise every former lurker who has given up the habit.
Rule #17: Assume the worst in every possible situation.
Rule #18: The ending is always fake. If GeneralHankerchief/pevergreen is hosting, there is more than one fake ending. If the host complains about the trend of adding fake endings to their games, the ending to their game is fake fake fake!
Rule #19: Ignore the dead scum, don't even answer them back they are only contributing to confuse you and make you lynch the wrong people
Rule #20: If ATPG offers himself in the first round lynch him... if pizza offers himself any round... lynch him...
Rule #21: Very few people know the true Rule #1 anymore
Rule #22:Sometimes, one must tell the truth in order to deceive..
Rule #23: Make sure fake PMs are not made in a 5 minute time frame.
Rule #24: There's no such thing as too much pm inbox space.
Rule #25: Don't listen to the psychological warfare... If someone calls you a pure opportunist with no honor just rest easy with the knowledge that you will show them all.
Rule #26: Before giving your word on something, consider what that actually means. If you know you won't be able to go through with something, use softer terms. One's integrity should be valued and can be hard to regain.
Rule #27: Winning isn't everything.
Rule #28: There are exceptions to every rule.
Rule #29: No matter how bad things are looking for your team, never give up.
Rule #30: The Joker is banned forever.
Rule #31: See Rule #30. Yes, its worth repeating.

[Double A]

I think 30 and 31 should be enforced by the death penalty.

[Beefy187]

I think 30 and 31 should be enforced by the death penalty.

Unless its jestar mafia.

[Askthepizzaguy]

Rule 1: Sasaki is always guilty.
Rule 2: Vote: Sasaki
Rule 3: No whining about losing.
Rule 4: Dont trust anyone.
Rule 5: Take your time when faking PMs.
Rule 6: It's always a trap.
Rule 7: Trust Husar, our local townie.
Rule 8: Half the town will get WoGed.
Rule 9: If playing as the Mafia do not kill Kagemusha. His death is cursed.
Rule 10: "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer" -- Vito Corleone
Rule 11: March divided, strike concentrated.
Rule 12: Dont kill people who arent actually playing.
Rule 13: There's no such thing as too much pm inbox space.
Rule 14: If mafia, don't kill Sasaki. He's probably on your side, somehow.
Rule 15: Csargo is always innocent.
Rule 16: Always use invisible mode.
Rule 17: Never assume the new player is harmless.
Rule 18: Reenk is Reenk.
Rule 19: It's not personal, it's just business.
Rule 20: Winning isn't everything.
Rule 21: There are exceptions to every rule.
Rule 22: Don't spam.
Rule 23: Expect the unexpected.
Rule 24: Never give up.
Rule 25: Pizza's games always have a twist.
Rule 26: Lynch the lurkers.
Rule 27: Assume the worst in every possible situation.
Rule 28: The ending is always fake.
Rule 29: If there is a Godfather in a game, always lynch GH.
Rule 30: Ignore the dead scum. Don't listen to a word they say.
Rule 31: Don't get distracted.
Rule 32: If pizza offers himself in the first round, lynch him; if pizza offers himself any round, lynch him.
Rule 33: Don't lynch Beefy.
Rule 34: Lynch beefy.
Rule 35: When you have people convinced not to kill you, DON'T KEEP TALKING!
Rule 36: Sometimes, one must tell the truth in order to deceive.
Rule 37: The Joker is banned forever.
Rule 38: The Joker is banned forever. Yes, its worth repeating.
Rule 39: Do what it takes to win.
Rule 40: It's always who you least suspect.
Rule 41: Metagaming is rarely as useful as you'd think.
Rule 42: Bandwagoning on a really large wagon adds nothing and causes harm.

[pevergreen]

Ones I dont agree with having from your list:
7,8,9,12,15,23,25,33,34,35,39