Anonymous.

by Anonymous


24 years of miserable life, 60 odd to go. Sometimes I wonder why I bother going on living. You may wonder why my life miserable, don’t worry, I do as well. I sit here, in my mother’s basement, nice and dark, the warm comforting glow of the computer screen is around me, while the young kids run around outside pointlessly. I guess I was that naïve once. Then I grew up. Coasted through High School, with average marks. Graduated and everything. Studying I.T. at university now, nothing special, I know how to handle a computer. I had me a girlfriend, but I don’t know what happened. She was perfect for me. We were totally in love through our last year of high school, we we’re each others first lovers. But I guess I screwed it up. I doubted myself. I didn’t think I was worthy of her. So I managed to screw up the best part of my life.

Do you ever just sit and listen to a single song for hours on end? It might not always be the same one, but sometimes you come across a song that just hits you. It could be funny, could be depressing. As I sit here, I think this is the 304th time I press play on youtube to listen to Jesus sing about thrush. I saw the original skit on tv years ago, but it still makes me happier than what I am. Or what I should be. I listen to Jesus and look at stuff on the internet. I generally keep a few things always open. News.com so I can pretend I care about what happens in the rest of the world. Digg is open as well, sometimes cool stuff gets posted there. Youtube of course, and no, I don’t use myspace or facebook or anything like that. I’m not some emo.

So I’m sitting here and a digg gets put up to this youtube video. Adventures of Octocat or something. Really shoddily made, but it has thousands of comments from different users. All saying a few different things. I somehow get this sense of brotherhood from it. Like they all know each other, but they don’t. I often get feelings like this, and having nothing better to do, I start looking into it, clicking along with Jesus’ singing. Hours and hours of searching gets me no advancement on my quest, but I do somehow find myself on the mailing list of a lot of porn sites. I get up, cracking my back and I go upstairs for dinner.

Roast…Oh the joy. I force myself to eat it and hurry back downstairs, eager for the passing distraction. After another hour or two I get a break through. Anonymous. Starting a new investigation with that as my main topic, I am actually excited. Excitement is rare in my world, it’s a nice break from soul-crushing boredom and regret.

Success! I find the main site of this “Anonymous”, 4chan.org. Luckily, I’m over 18 so I’m sure I’m not breaking any laws to access the place, even though it has only one or two rules itself. It seems to be an imageboard, lots of different topics. I am filled with apprehension, so I click one at random, it takes me to the Random board. How ironic.
I scroll down, to the first post and I stop. My jaw opens. My vision of a utopia is crushed. The people here are fighting themselves! New users get abused constantly, in a never ending flood of profanity. I hope that it is an isolated case, and I look further down. Once again I stop, and my jaw opens wider. A child is being raped in the picture…these people are enjoying it. Its terrible, but…but…I cant look away.

Time passes

The last few weeks have been a haze. I’ve dropped out of uni, I’m holding down a crap job at the local game store…this new site, and /b/ has captivated me. I have no life outside it. The thrush song? Gone. Replaced by Rick Astley. He’s such a classic singer. Although I don’t agree with everything on /b/, I’ve finally found a place where I can relate to people. I got in one little fight and my mother got scared. She said I had to move in with my auntie and uncle in Bel-Air, so my time with /b/ has come to an end. Too bad, spring is over, and just like the many animals outside, I have been reborn.

I am now Anonymous. We do not forgive, we do not forget. We are legion.