To some degree wouldn't it depend on the culture you were, and the one you spared. I mean some cultures were always trouble because of a high sense of independance, Iberia was always trouble. I get the idea being gentle wouldn't be repaid in kind. Certainly the Romans were brutal at times there, to pacify areas.
But if you were for example a Greek culture taking a Greek based culture, then perphaps being gentle could well pay off.
What I presume EB cannot do is transmit the effect of a massacre to cower an enemy, or to the world stage, ie Alexanders don't mess with me destruction of Thebes(or was it Corinth-sorry I can't remember)durring the Greeks rebellion, after the death of Phillip.
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