Eurovision.

[PBI]

And when it comes to your griefs, well... nobody really likes Germany, but at least you are not like the poor British who often end up only with some charity votes from Ireland and Malta.

Indeed, although given some of the terrible songs we enter I would be ashamed if we were to do well. I was actually quite pleased the year we managed to get nil points, quite a hard achievement nowadays with so many countries in it.

I do think we should take a leaf out of Yugoslavia's book, however, and enter as the home nations (England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland), thus quadrupling our voting power overnight.

Regarding drinking games, last year we tried drinking every time a country gives points to a neighbouring country. This is not recommended.

But then again, I really wouldn't want to try and watch the thing sober.