The Magnaura

**Ituralde** · 06-03-2008, 14:50

"So we should listen to the clown now, shall we?

A man that sputters incoherently about chickens one minute, passes out the next, and then tells us of his wild fancies of attacking entire cities with nothing more than his retinue and some peasants. I bloody hope the physicians will get his head fixed, before he comes in here again!"

**Privateerkev** · 06-03-2008, 19:47

OOC:

I'm getting confused by the edicts and seconds so I'm just going to put up an OOC list. Please let me know if I made any mistakes.

Edict 1.1: At any given moment, the Basileus can decide to use all resources of the Empire for a direct assault on Rome. Every nobleman who is ordered to join this assault on Rome, will have to follow the call of the Emperor and will use all his available resources for the conquest of Rome.

Proposed by Savvas ek Militou

Edict 1.2: All military assets will be devoted to the conquest of the rebel settlements of Canakkale, Arta, Durazzo, Scopia, Sofia, Sinop, Smyrna, and Rhodes before they can be released for other purposes. Bari and Trebizond may be included in this list at the discretion of the Megas Logothetes. No attack will be made on any foreign nation until this reconquest is complete. This Edict does not apply to any of the above settlements which are conquered by a foreign nation before they are reincorporated into the Empire. This Edict is void if a foreign nation attacks the Empire.

Proposed by Khristophoros Diogenis
Seconded by Markianos Ampelas and Pavlos Chrysovergos

Edict 1.3: A Priest is to be sent in the region surrounding Caesarea to help our Orthodox brethern against their Muslim overlords.

Proposed by Pavlos Chrysovergos
Seconded by Makedonios Ksanthopoulos and Savvas ek Militou

Edict 1.4: If Edict 1.2 passes, Antioch will be added to the list.

Proposed by Makedonios Ksanthopoulos
Seconded by Hypatios Machonios and Iakovos ek Kallipoleos

Edict 1.5: The training of a boat or hiring of a mercenary craft is required outside of Athens in order to transport men to Rhodes, as per Edict 1.2. The fleet we already own further North may also be used if it has no other orders.

Proposed by Hypatios Machonios
Seconded by Armatos ek Naksou and Makedonios Ksanthopoulos

Edict 1.6: That a ship be sent immediately towards Epirus to ferry a commander and a battalion of spearmen to Apulia with the intent of capturing the castle of Bari.

Proposed by Anastasios Neokaisareitis
Seconded by Ioannis Kalameteros and Kosmas Mavrozomis

Edict 1.7: The Empire shall strive to capture Durazzo and Arta utalising the General's Anastasios and Michail respectively, within the first "term".

Proposed by Michail Arianitis

Edict 1.8: The creation of 2 agents. A diplomat to make contact with the Orthodox Factions of the north for an alliance and trade. The other diplomat to head west to contact European Factions for diplomatic talk and trade.

Proposed by Aleksios ek Ikoniou
Seconded by Khristophoros Diogenis and Methodios Tagaris

NN had his 1.8 as 1.7 for a short time. Two people seconded 1.7 when they meant 1.8

*edit*

TC has confirmed this. Therefore there are still no seconds on 1.7 but 1.8 has the required amount.

**TinCow** · 06-03-2008, 19:50

OOC: 1.8 was numbered 1.7 at the time Andres and I seconded it. NN later changed it to 1.8, hence the discrepancy. We both were seconding NN's Edict, not the one before it.

**The Lemongate** · 06-03-2008, 20:01

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

A grotesquely fat man in outrageously stylish italian clothes appears at the doors of the Senate chamber. He has a very business-like attitude and, taking advantage of a lul in the debates, walks up to the Protoasecretes and demands, in a skweaky italian voice to be given a room and a dinner, preferably, of mutton chops. Before the befuddled official gets any chance to understand what is happening, the man turns to the assembled Senators:

What is the meaning of this farce! I am Voluminoso Maiale of Genoa! Merchant extraordinaire! I control the entire mutton chop trade from Venice to Lisboa, I could buy palaces in Egypt and this here inkeeper refuses me a simple meal! OUTRAGEOUS! Mama mia! If we were back in Italia I would have you clean the stables with your tongue, arlecchino!

As Voluminoso speaks and gesticulates, globs of greasy sweat that had been accumulating on his face and hands fly wildly about the room, forcing certain senators to run for cover. The poor Protoasecretes is forced to bear the brunt of the oily attack but is fortunatly saved a terrible beating at the hands of the italian as two guards quickly move to control the situation.

As the guards painfully attempt to drag him out while he flings energetically his enormous, feathered hat at them, he bellows ominously:

Terrible service! Servizio terribile! TERRIBILE!!! I will complain to the highest authorities! You scimmie have not heard the last of me! No one insults Voluminoso with impunity!

As he spits (literally) his final words at the Senate, the guards manage to throw him out. But in a terrible twist of fate, Voluminoso manages to grip a guardsman by the arm and drags him down with him, cushioning his fall. The other guards quickly close the doors of the Senate, but the wail of their unfortunate comrade can be heard through the wood and masonry. The most pious Senators send a heartfelt prayer for the poor guardsmen and someone can be seen running for a doctor.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read:

**Kagemusha** · 06-03-2008, 20:10

Ioannis Kantakouzinos stands up with large grin on his face and says jokingly.

"Maybe the Varangian guard should be deployed around the Senate building, because it seems even the Senate building itself is being invaded by Westerners, Saracens and Clowns."

**Askthepizzaguy** · 06-03-2008, 22:14

Efstratios is awakened by the Royal medic and overhears. He stands up and demands with anger,

And just what do you have against clowns, good sir? While vile western merchants and dubious middle easterners are indeed a possible threat to the realm, precisely what threat does a clown present?

I have served this Emperor honourably since I was 16 years of age. I fought in some of the greatest battles of our time, and personally defended the Empire with my life, and I have the battle scars to prove it. I have seen battle so much that I can apparently lose large amounts of blood and still deliver stunning rebuttals while voting on important legislation and juggling!

While I do not question your devotion to the Empire, good sir, you cannot question mine, nor can you dismiss me simply because I had the decency to entertain poor, orphaned children that society has forgotten, between my duties serving my master as a mercenary general and voting in the Imperial senate!

I embody loyalty, hard work, dignity, and-
Efstratios slips on the sticky puddle of his own blood and is knocked unconscious yet again.

**Kagemusha** · 06-04-2008, 00:15

Ioannis tries to to control his laughter, while replying to the questions of now unconscious Monomachos, but he has to walk instead out of the Senate to unleash a burst of laughter.

**pevergreen** · 06-04-2008, 00:39

Michail wakes after his nice sleep, to hear some of Ioannis' comments.

"Invaded? The single saracen that sits besides me is, from all I can tell, an honourable man! He is no more an invader than you. I stand by this man, if you seek to damage his reputation, damage mine!"

Michail sits down, livid with anger. A few minutes later, his face is back to its normal set, emotionless.