What would offend a Celt?

[Theodotos I]

An unusual question, obviously, but I need it answered for my Aedui AAR. I mean, one thing you could do in ancient times in the Middle East to insult a king's messenger would be to forcibly shave off his beard, but the Celts generally shied away from beards. So, what would be the Gallic/Celtic equivalent of such an ? Thanks for any constructive advice.

[Sand]

Dump him in the settlements latrine? That would certainly be construed as insulting in some cultures.

Would even allow for "Madness? THIS-IS-<Name of settlement here>!"

[johnhughthom]

I think the main way to offend a modern Celt is to call him English.

[DaCrAzYmOfO]

I say shave off his mustache :D

[satalexton]

call him a roman? (read too much astrix >_>)

[cmacq]

As there are no Celts today, I assume you're question is about pre-Roman Gaul or southern Germany. In that case, one Gaul to another may tell their enemy, that after he took his head, above the door he'd nail it to the shed, so his ugly face might scare away the crows. And for his body, if he could only hide the smell, he will chop it up and feed it to the dogs, if they'd deem it fit enough to eat?

[ezekiel2517]

I think the main way to offend a modern Celt is to call him English.

couldn't help but to laugh at this one

[Shylence]

Spit in his face. right in the eye. that would definatly offened anyone let alone a gaul

[Celtic_Punk]

I think the main way to offend a modern Celt is to call him English.

thats more than an offence, thats the quickest way to be sleeping at the bottom of the irish sea



but seriously, if you call into question the parentage of himself or his children, or his skills as a tradesmen/businessmen then you are going to get a mouthful of knuckles

[Cyclops]

Sorry not to give a serious answer.

Here's an example of a successful (?) insult given to a Gaul.

Negotiations broke down, resulting in Quintus Fabius, a member of a powerful patrician family, killing one of the Gallic leaders. The Gauls demanded the Fabians be handed over to them for justice. However, the defiant Romans not only refused, but, as Livy writes, "those who ought to have been punished were instead appointed for the coming year military tribunes with consular powers (the highest that could be granted)." The enraged Gauls promised war against the Romans to avenge the insult that they had been dealt, resulting in the Battle of the Allia and the subsequent siege of Rome itself.

from wiki

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Allia

slightly different version of events in Appian here:

http://www.livius.org/ap-ark/appian/..._gallic_2.html

[cmacq]

Yes, and thus these moronic Latins were set straight on the path to empire.

Again, in the Gaulish Culture (450-45 BC) the greatest insult to a defeated enemy would be the desecration of the falled foe's body by removing the head (seat of the soul) and displaying it as a trophy. Within the belief system of this society, this act alone deigned the dead an afterlife. By the way, their concept of an afterlife was the keystone that held this Culture and individual Gaulish societies together. Then cutting the corpse into small bits and scattering them or feeding them to animals (burning the body bits would actually have been seen as favorable). On this line, feeding the body bits to the victors hounds, would have been by far the most insulting. Anything more would have been seen as crass window dressing.

[dominique]

Yes, and thus these moronic Latins were set straight on the path to empire.

Your post gave me a strange idea and a good laugh:

The romans were like this guy who got dressed as a girl and raped in prison, and when he's back in the 'hood, he gets even with the world by bullying everybody and his dog.

Modern version: NO, I WAS NO PRISON BITCH!

Roman version: NO, ROME WASN'T SACKED, THE GEESE SAVED US!



for a little reference on the joke:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_the_Allia