What would offend a Celt?

[Theodotos I]

An unusual question, obviously, but I need it answered for my Aedui AAR. I mean, one thing you could do in ancient times in the Middle East to insult a king's messenger would be to forcibly shave off his beard, but the Celts generally shied away from beards. So, what would be the Gallic/Celtic equivalent of such an ? Thanks for any constructive advice.

[Sand]

Dump him in the settlements latrine? That would certainly be construed as insulting in some cultures.

Would even allow for "Madness? THIS-IS-<Name of settlement here>!"

[johnhughthom]

I think the main way to offend a modern Celt is to call him English.

[DaCrAzYmOfO]

I say shave off his mustache :D

[satalexton]

call him a roman? (read too much astrix >_>)

[cmacq]

As there are no Celts today, I assume you're question is about pre-Roman Gaul or southern Germany. In that case, one Gaul to another may tell their enemy, that after he took his head, above the door he'd nail it to the shed, so his ugly face might scare away the crows. And for his body, if he could only hide the smell, he will chop it up and feed it to the dogs, if they'd deem it fit enough to eat?

[ezekiel2517]

I think the main way to offend a modern Celt is to call him English.

couldn't help but to laugh at this one

[Shylence]

Spit in his face. right in the eye. that would definatly offened anyone let alone a gaul

[Olaf The Great]

Insult his plaid pants/kilt.

[Shigawire]

Certainly by insulting his more famous ancestors.

[Havok.]

Insult his plaid pants/kilt.

ohh dear.....
hahahahahah!

[Swordmaster]

Tell them their bagpipes and tartans are all fake 19th century stuff.

[Havok.]

Tell them their bagpipes and tartans are all fake 19th century stuff.

i aint scottish but i was deeply offended by that >_>

[General Appo]

Rape and kill his entire family (including male members, pets and husbandry animals, any servants and the occasional passer-by), burn his home, discredit his name to make him the laughing stock of the entire world and get him exiled from pretty much everywhere, turn his friends against him (and then rape and kill them just for the heck of it), beat him up and leave him alone completely naked in the wilderness, crush his private parts (not cut off, crush), breck his fingers, nose, toes and some various other bones, publicy torture him infront of a laughing crowd throwing tomatoes and passing water on him, have dogs rape him, slowly force him to eat parts of his own body, and then finally say something really mean about his mother. That usually makes them feel a bit insulted, though admitedly, it doesn´t always work.

[Havok.]

Rape and kill his entire family (including male members, pets and husbandry animals, any servants and the occasional passer-by), burn his home, discredit his name to make him the laughing stock of the entire world and get him exiled from pretty much everywhere, turn his friends against him (and then rape and kill them just for the heck of it), beat him up and leave him alone completely naked in the wilderness, crush his private parts (not cut off, crush), breck his fingers, nose, toes and some various other bones, publicy torture him infront of a laughing crowd throwing tomatoes and passing water on him, have dogs rape him, slowly force him to eat parts of his own body, and then finally say something really mean about his mother. That usually makes them feel a bit insulted, though admitedly, it doesn´t always work.

You're one scary guy

[||Lz3||]

You're one scary guy

nah... he's just appo , its... normal...

[Havok.]

nah... he's just appo , its... normal...

[Power2the1]

Certainly by insulting his more famous ancestors.

Definitely that!

Another thing is if you and another warrior both lay claim to the Heroes portion of meat at dinner time...that'll end in death for one or both of y'all probably.

Raiding his land/cattle is another sure way to guarantee a reprisal raid of your own land and cattle in the future.

[artavazd]

Calling him a ManWhore?

[Cyclops]

What would offend a Celt?

Hide his menhir?

Kidnap his druid?

Tell him he is a mythical creation of Hellenic/Roman xenophobia compounded with 19th century sectarian/nationalist sentiment?

As there are no Celts today....

Cheeky fellow, there's lots of people who call themselves Celts.

They live in their ancient homelands of Brooklyn and possibly Queens, and worship at the shrine of the Gallo-Lenape deity Tammany

[roman]

Tell him that he is a part of "Fantasy" 2 hander sword unit, and is desperately trying to substitute lack of manhood with the size of the sword.

Plus i would guess a show of disrespect towards ones chosen deity might get things started nicely as well.

[ibleedgrenchese]

Just cut off his head stock it in his ass and throw him back to the gaul imsure someone might find that provoking

[russia almighty]

If he has a hot red head sister, banging her?

[Tyrfingr]

Calling him a ManWhore?

Or accusing him of loving the crappy band Manowar?

[Tellos Athenaios]

IIRC the Celts were (compared to Romans and others) exceedingly well aware of the need to keep themselves clean & keep up shape. Something along the lines of comparing him to a fat, smelly Roman barbarian might've offended him -- I guess. <_<

[Hax]

i aint scottish but i was deeply offended by that >_>

Yeah, then seriously, don't be offended.

I play the bagpipes myself. Or should I say the horrible sound of a goat in pain.

[QuintusSertorius]

Questioning his personal honour and the value of his word? Didn't Gauls take oaths very seriously?

Insulting the hospitality of his home.

[Havok.]

Yeah, then seriously, don't be offended.

I play the bagpipes myself. Or should I say the horrible sound of a goat in pain.

Me too
though i'm a player of Portuguese bagpipes, called Transmontana, not sure if you guys know it...

[Olimpian]

Showing him how his people are portrayed in RTW vanilla?

[Havok.]

Olimpian said it all