OK, let's try this again.

[Viking]

I'm too late!

Twice the size of France, only a handful of nomads, slavery as the norm, and plenty of newly discovered oil. I was sooo trying to get four hundred adventurous lads together and install myself as dictator.

I'm very sorry on your behalf, Louis; it happens to the best.

Spoiler Alert, click show to read: 

By the way, quite a friend base you've got

I've been idling when it comes to catching up with the world and the headlines lately, and I actually had no idea any political unrest going on in Mauritania.

It wasn't either; this was triggered by the president's wish to rid the military's top commanders. AFAIK.

India/Australia has to be one of the shinning examples,

I hope the shinning was not too humiliating.