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Thread: Contest comments thread.

  1. #1
    The Abominable Senior Member Hexxagon Champion Monk's Avatar
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    Default Contest comments thread.

    Have something to say?

    Let your voice be heard!

    Official rules thread is found here.
    Last edited by Monk; 10-01-2008 at 23:35.

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    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Nice story Ramses. I like the opening and the middle. I got a little confused in the middle thinking zombies popped outta nowhere in the middle of the war/battle. You put it together nicely at the end. Good work
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

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    Prince Louis of France (KotF) Member Ramses II CP's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Thanks Decker. To be perfectly honest I wrote the whole thing on my phone off the top of my head while my daughter was in her gymnastics class (Inspiration struck while I was reading the thread). I emailed it to myself and corrected the spelling (stapho-whatsits?) after the fact but otherwise tried to leave it alone. Editing and correcting was always the part of writing I enjoyed least.

    Not expecting to win anything, but when you're inspired you might as well share.


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    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ramses II CP View Post
    Thanks Decker. To be perfectly honest I wrote the whole thing on my phone off the top of my head while my daughter was in her gymnastics class (Inspiration struck while I was reading the thread). I emailed it to myself and corrected the spelling (stapho-whatsits?) after the fact but otherwise tried to leave it alone. Editing and correcting was always the part of writing I enjoyed least.

    Not expecting to win anything, but when you're inspired you might as well share.

    Yeah no problem And really? That's funny because I had just finished reading Keegan's The Face of Battle, and he has a whole section on the battle of the Somme. Then I come here and you have your "paper." And I feel ya on the correcting haha... I hate that. I always try to get someone else to do it

    And hey, it's all for the imagination. It's always interesting to see what people have mulling around in their head.
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

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    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Interesting story Lemur. It kind of reminds me of There Will Be Blood but focusing on all the moments between the dad and the son.
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

  6. #6
    Senior Member Senior Member naut's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    I really enjoyed both. Very different styles, both good stories.
    #Hillary4prism

    BD:TW

    Some piously affirm: "The truth is such and such. I know! I see!"
    And hold that everything depends upon having the “right” religion.
    But when one really knows, one has no need of religion. - Mahavyuha Sutra

    Freedom necessarily involves risk. - Alan Watts

  7. #7
    Senior Member Senior Member naut's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Nice story AoM. Good read.
    #Hillary4prism

    BD:TW

    Some piously affirm: "The truth is such and such. I know! I see!"
    And hold that everything depends upon having the “right” religion.
    But when one really knows, one has no need of religion. - Mahavyuha Sutra

    Freedom necessarily involves risk. - Alan Watts

  8. #8
    The Abominable Senior Member Hexxagon Champion Monk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Hey all.

    Unsticking the thread to tidy up around here. This place has gotten so dusty.

    Continue to post all comments/critiques you have on the entries! With luck we'll have more before the week is up.
    Last edited by Monk; 10-27-2008 at 17:29.

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    Retired Senior Member Prince Cobra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    I hope another onew would be added to the collection of contest stories

    Edited : Soon
    Last edited by Prince Cobra; 10-27-2008 at 20:00.
    R.I.P. Tosa...


  10. #10
    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Nice story AoM. Liking the imagery you used.
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

  11. #11
    One of the Undutchables Member The Stranger's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    i might be able to get a story in... not a chance for a 1 or 2 day delay? since this week im working 60 hours and you happened to deny my entry on invalid reasons!!!! ;)

    We do not sow.

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    The Abominable Senior Member Hexxagon Champion Monk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Rythmic's entry is up.

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    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Interesting story Rythmic. The parts with the "()" were you own commentary?? Was a little distracting. But other than that. It was an interesting read. Was the guy schizophrenic? That was one of my first thoughts lol. I liked watching him with this "shadowy figure" haunting him on his walk home.



    And I just wish everyone was allowed to flesh out their entire stories Some look to be really good
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

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    Senior Member Senior Member naut's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Decker View Post
    Interesting story Rythmic. The parts with the "()" were you own commentary?? Was a little distracting. But other than that. It was an interesting read. Was the guy schizophrenic? That was one of my first thoughts lol. I liked watching him with this "shadowy figure" haunting him on his walk home.
    Hmm, maybe I should have picked 'The Shadow' as the title after all.
    #Hillary4prism

    BD:TW

    Some piously affirm: "The truth is such and such. I know! I see!"
    And hold that everything depends upon having the “right” religion.
    But when one really knows, one has no need of religion. - Mahavyuha Sutra

    Freedom necessarily involves risk. - Alan Watts

  15. #15
    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Rythmic View Post
    Hmm, maybe I should have picked 'The Shadow' as the title after all.
    I actually like the title you have up more than "The Shadow" It's got a more... "epic" short story type air around it like some of the great writers out there.
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

  16. #16
    Mercury Member Thermal's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ramses II CP View Post
    Thanks Decker. To be perfectly honest I wrote the whole thing on my phone off the top of my head while my daughter was in her gymnastics class (Inspiration struck while I was reading the thread). I emailed it to myself and corrected the spelling (stapho-whatsits?) after the fact but otherwise tried to leave it alone. Editing and correcting was always the part of writing I enjoyed least.

    Not expecting to win anything, but when you're inspired you might as well share.

    i was scarely confused reading yours, because the language was so advanced

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    Retired Senior Member Prince Cobra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    GAH! Sent few minutes ago... I hope it is not late since according to the org. clock it is 1 hour after midnight... but according to the all other clocks it is 00.00GMT...

    My story has no title. ...

    Very vicious story

    Note the info about Manuel is slightly exaggerated (absolutely consciously: he has not done the perversions he was accused)
    Last edited by Prince Cobra; 11-01-2008 at 02:03.
    R.I.P. Tosa...


  18. #18
    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Stephen Asen View Post
    GAH! Sent few minutes ago... I hope it is not late since according to the org. clock it is 1 hour after midnight... but according to the all other clocks it is 00.00GMT...

    My story has no title. ...

    Very vicious story

    Note the info about Manuel is slightly exaggerated (absolutely consciously: he has not done the perversions he was accused)
    Like gratuitous blood and guts??? AWESOMENESS
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

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    The Abominable Senior Member Hexxagon Champion Monk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Stephen Asen View Post
    GAH! Sent few minutes ago... I hope it is not late since according to the org. clock it is 1 hour after midnight... but according to the all other clocks it is 00.00GMT...

    My story has no title. ...

    Very vicious story

    Note the info about Manuel is slightly exaggerated (absolutely consciously: he has not done the perversions he was accused)
    My own policy has been to be a little flexible when it comes to the midnight deadline mainly due to the fact that the .org boasts members from all walks of life and cultures. For instance I live in the states, on the east coast, and am therefore many hours behind GMT. I may be out with friends or writing a paper at the same time someone is slipping an entry under my metaphorical door here at the .org.

    In short, the Midnight deadline is there and should be respected but I am normally willing to go +/- an hour.

    Stephen Asen's entry is posted. Submission phase is now basically closed. It's been a hell of a month, thank you to all who submitted entries! The judging will begin shortly.

  20. #20
    One of the Undutchables Member The Stranger's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    noooooo... i thought it was till sunday... wtf

    We do not sow.

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    Retired Senior Member Prince Cobra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Quote Originally Posted by Decker View Post
    Like gratuitous blood and guts??? AWESOMENESS
    It is strange but the whole story starts from a romantic gay love between Nicephorus and Dyogenes Branas(an attempt to escape from the cliche; something like a new version of Romeo and Juilette )... Then something gets wrong and Nicephorus changes... Lust, almost no feelings, passion for power... It's sad story... It's another matter of discussion I'm not as good writer as I wished.
    Last edited by Prince Cobra; 11-01-2008 at 10:21.
    R.I.P. Tosa...


  22. #22
    Banned ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Pretty Good stories I think


    Good Luck Everyone

  23. #23
    The Abominable Senior Member Hexxagon Champion Monk's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Coulda swore I posted here...

    Oh well. CONTEST OVER!

    Check the results thread for official winner and runner-up. The selection this season was great and not at all easy, there were a number who we had to debate at length, which just goes to show how good some of these were.

    Thanks to all who entered, see you next season!

  24. #24
    Retired Senior Member Prince Cobra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Winner: Rythmic
    Runner-up: Lemur


    Nice stories and deserved awards!
    Last edited by Prince Cobra; 11-04-2008 at 21:09.
    R.I.P. Tosa...


  25. #25
    German Enthusiast Member Alexanderofmacedon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    It's always great when a participant in the contest feels no different win or lose. I take pleasure in just sharing the piece with you all! Congrats to the winners!


  26. #26
    Senior Member Senior Member naut's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    Speechless... I really, really enjoyed reading everyone's entries though, and I'm not sure how I won...

    Well-done Lemur, I really thought you would win to be honest.
    #Hillary4prism

    BD:TW

    Some piously affirm: "The truth is such and such. I know! I see!"
    And hold that everything depends upon having the “right” religion.
    But when one really knows, one has no need of religion. - Mahavyuha Sutra

    Freedom necessarily involves risk. - Alan Watts

  27. #27
    One of the Undutchables Member The Stranger's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    congratz rythmic and lemur! welcome to the club :P

    We do not sow.

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    Member Member Decker's Avatar
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    Default Re: Contest comments thread.

    indeed good showing gents
    "No one said it was gonna be easy! If it was, everyone would do it..that's who you know who really wants it."

    All us men suffer in equal parts, it's our lot in life, and no man goes without a broken heart or a lost love. Like holding your dog as he takes his last breath and dies in your arms, it's a rite of passage. Unavoidable. And honestly, I can't imagine life without that depth of feeling.-Bierut

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    Banned ELITEofWARMANGINGERYBREADMEN88's Avatar
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    Wink Re: Contest comments thread.

    Congrats Gentlemen

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