Old ways are the best ways! Twenty cubits to a stade! Fifteen chains to a fathom!

These newfangled Normans with their fancy chained-mail and their miles and their ... oh, wait, sorry, I was off by a few years. Ahem. I meant to say, death to the metric system! Just because the military, science, aerospace and the rest of the world use the metric system is no reason we should do so!

Somebody bring me some freedom fries.