Old age

[Quirinus]

The oldest family member I've seen reach old age is probably somewhere in the nineties-- and that was just one time, most of my family members buy the latifunda at around seventy. It was Lucius Julius, one of the starting generals for the Julii. He had good management ratings, so I stuck him in Patavium. Eventually he became faction leader, and managed to outlive all his brothers-- and even two of his sons! When he was about sixty-five, I started moving retinues to younger family members, but he lived on productively for another 50-60 turns.

For your lack of suitors, I wouldn't worry about it too much. In fact, I would just sit on those daughters, rather than marry them to mediocre old men. Since the addition of family members in RTW is governed by the number of territories you have, your stream of suitors aren't likely to dry up any time soon. Just keep rejecting the mediocre ones until you stumble upon an exceptional bloke. Even if your daughters are past marrying age, you will continue to get family member offers, in the form of adoption.

Man of the Hour seems to be triggered only when your family-member:territory ratio becomes too low, so if you have an overabundance of family members, even heroic victories won't help.