We've already had a defeats thread, so now its time for a victories thread.
I'll start this off with my own tale: I was playing as the Sweboz in the 230s, and me and the Aedui had a war going on. I took my "royal" (qualified as royal because it was basically my only army; it was also a very great army that truly represented the variety of units the Germanic peoples can field) and had it march down through the Alps into Insubramrog (Milan province).
I parked it at the edge of the mountain pass into the Alps, hoping to use the topography to my advantage. I was attacked by a stack with 2 FMs in it, which was supported by another stack. Thinking that there was no way I would risk my army in such a massive battle, I retreated. Only to get attacked by a stack from the South. My army had about 35,000 men, give or take a couple thousand. The enemy stack was similar in size, and had 3 VETERAN Cinjetos and Gaesatae. I destroyed it, and had about 30000 men left ( not really sure, 5-8000 lost is what I can remember).
At this point, I was having a grand time lampooning the Aedui for their incompetence, plotting the fate of Mediolanium once it fell into my hands, when the fullstack with the 2 FMs attacked me (RPed as only two days later). This was a proper battle, and in the end I triumphed, although an enemy FM escaped and my numbers were reduced to 18000 (about 10000 lost). I took a deep breath, congratulated myself, and debated calling it a campaign and retreating back into Germanlandum.
Of course, the Aedui weren't about to let me off so easily. The third fullstack (describe in the 2nd big paragraph) attacked me. And it had....
I started to get worried at that point. In retrospect, I still have yet to see a closer or more difficult EB battle. There was immense slaughter. Eventually, it was down to some of my battered units and their Solduros and Gaesatae. The two battles were separated by something like 250 meters. My FM and remaining infantry eventually bested the Gaesatae, although they spent 5 minutes wavering, and delayed me for so long that with each passing second my dread grew. The situation with the Solduros was so desperate that after they had emptied their quivers my Baltic archers were forced to frontally charge them. There was simply no time to encircle them, as mere hundreds remained to combat their 1000+. My FM crushed the Gaesatae, who had, true to form, fought to the last, and attacked the sides of the Solduros with whatever pitiful forces remained.
The last of my forces began to rout. I knew that my FM, great general that he was, would die gloriously in single combat against a worthy opponent. I roared out epithets so shockingly offensive that repeating them within earshot of 99.9% of humans would get me knifed. As I glared at the unit list through eyes blurred with tears, I noticed something. A unit of 700 Speutogardozez, ust standing around. I realized that earlier in the battle they had run off after some slingers. Yes, they had single-handedly destroyed the enemy's impressive missile assets, at a cost of 200 or 300 men. But they were on the other side of the map; would they make it in time?
It is true; I gave in to despair. Even as they ran at top speed towards the battle, my remaining units all routed until a mere handful of Baltic archers and 200 of my general's Companions still fought. And my Speutogardoz were still so far away.
There they were, in the home stretch, poised to strike at the Solduros' rear. The last archer fell. The general was fighting back-to-back with his men. The pikemen sounded the horn as they charged. I simultaneously screamed at the top of my lungs and belted out LOTR music. In the end, only 500 men remained standing on the field, surrounded by tens of thousands of dead.
After all the healing, the survivors amounted to about 6,000 men. If they had sent out the small force that garrisoned Mediolanium, I would have been destroyed for sure. But my men limped back through the Alps unmolested. I had lost 30000 men, but over 70,000 Celts had been slain. According to the faction charts, the Aedui had lost half of their military strength.
FORKING EPIC
Unfortunately, the general was bribed by Rome 2 turns later and I had to assassinate him.
The end.
Most Glorious Victories
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