English! Who talks funny?

[Sisco Americanus]

This is a bit inaccurate. Regional dialects are still common among certain groups throughout Germany. High German isn't very similar to the regional dialects that dominate in the South (Bavarian, Austrian, Swabian) or the North (Plat German and so on). The coastal dialects tend to borrow more words from English and maybe even pronunciation because of the influence of commerce. Bavarian and Austrian is practically incomprehensible for most Germans, as is the dialect of Cologne.

I guess I've been misinformed, then. Or perhaps I'm not recalling correctly-- It was many, many years ago.

EDIT: Perhaps this is the source of the confusion. From Wikipedia (yeah, yeah, I know):

Hochdeutsch (lit. "high German") is a phrase in German.

Linguistically and historically, it refers to the High German languages, which developed in the Southern uplands and the Alps.
Hochdeutsch is always used to refer to Standard German in daily (German) language, a confusing term since it collides with the linguistic meaning.
In the common meaning, "hoch" refers to "high" in a cultural or educational sense (sometimes pejoratively), while the linguistic term simply refers to the geography of Germany.