I have big problems; please help me.

[Ramses II CP]

The fact that you're here to talk about it means the odds are you've already decided not to make a serious attempt. That's good. The fact that you made your gesture to a bunch of essentially random people on the 'net is less good. There's no substitute for looking someone in the eye when you speak to them, so find someone you can be in the same room with, or at the very least someone you can speak to on the phone, and go through this with them. If you continue seeking attention online you're going to run into negative reinforcement sooner rather than later. If this is the only place you feel comfortable then it's better than nothing, but don't count on long term help here.

A guy I went to school with killed himself at sixteen. Not a close friend, but that afternoon, before he did it, he told me and a couple of other people a pretty good joke. That's the kind of person he was, funny and gregarious. When he decided to do it he just did it. Yeah we all knew he had issues, everybody has issues, the point I'm trying to make is that by discussing it you make it less likely to happen, so keep talking.

Good luck.