I first found it tempting to out-shoot the enemy (AI), falsely believing it would result in fewer kills to me -as in MTW2, but am now of the same opinion as von Clausewitz, that even in the 18th century, melee is the main focus of combat.

For me, the key difference between ETW and MTW2 is that in MTW2, i found it was generaly more advantageous to attack with missile fire than hand to hand -as you could receive fewer casualties for the number of kills you inflicted on the enemy (providing you had the strategy, tactics and the troops that is: hello mr pavise crossbowman, sitting on a hill-top/river crossing etc). I found that MTW2 battles were more even in melee, where you would receive a higher number of freindly casualties per enemy kills.

In ETW however, the tables have turned. I find that it's both harder to engineer the tactical advantage to enable devastating missile firing and that by and large, missile exchanges (shooting it out) are now most equal in terms of kills received and inflicted. It might be just a more level playing field (literally -there are now few large hills to camp on), but I now find that melee is more conclusive and that I seek to engage in it earlier than I would have in MTW2.

Consider European line inf vs European line inf. Both will always have the same range -unless endowed with a tactical advantage (eg on a hill), so the advantage usually lies with who gets the first shot/volley off. Tech advantages over the enemy (ie they don't have them) like rank and platoon fire will help a good deal, but your unit will still stand to lose a fair few men from even their first volley. Experienced and elite line infantry units have higher firing and melee skills but will still die just as easily as raw recruits from the enemies fire. In fact, I've so far found that elite and experienced units have a greater melee advantage than ranged and that they kill more per casualty in melee than in a protracted musket duel.

Real tactics of the time involved firing a couple of volleys before a bayonette charge. This works most of the time for me too in ETW (and has been recommended by many on this forum).

Ultimately though, the most conclusive battles and those with the highest ratio of enemy deaths to yours result from combined arms and tactical out-maneuvering of the enemy. Using each troop type as appropriate and to the best effect, in coordination with the rest of your army was and is still the best way of levering those 'Heroic' victories.